This will more or less be rambling, but I have to find some way to get this stuff out. I make no promises of coherency.

I'll start by saying I was incredibly excited for GTA V to come out. I preordered it as early as I could, I watched all the prerelease footage, and I was planning on hitting up a midnight release. That's why it sucks that I don't think I can bring myself to play it. At least not anytime soon.

Here's the story: I went in to work this morning and everything was normal until we were all called into my boss' office. He said that we were locking down because there were reportedly shots fired in a neighboring building. If you haven't caught my drift yet, I work on the Navy Yard in Washington, DC.

At that time it we were surprised (because who expects that type of thing?), but nobody in our office had any idea of the true situation. We all went back to work (checking the news sites a little more often, of course) and were surprised when we saw that this was being reported as the top national story. That's when word started to get out that people had actually been shot and there might be fatalities.

Unfortunately, the only information we had for most of the day was what was being reported in the media. The conflicting reports did not help things. Neither did the helicopter we could hear circling overhead. Even still, we kept working (I think as much for a distraction as for actually getting work done).

Then came the time when, presumably, the shooter had been killed and the police/FBI/SWAT/Marines (apparently 1800 strong) on the Yard at that time were sweeping the area. The media updates slowed down and we were all just waiting for the all clear to go home. Turns out, my building was among the last cleared because of its proximity to the scene. Finally we were taken to the conference room where we gave investigators our information and our statements (not that any of us had the opportunity to see anything) before being escorted off the base.

After all of this, of course we were pretty tired and hungry from being locked in the office all day, but I don't think it actually sunk in what had happened until we were able to see the parking lots full of news vans. That's when it started to hit me how close I was to one of those awful stories that is talked about in the news for a few days before you put it out of your mind because it happened somewhere else to people you don't know.

Which I guess brings me back to GTA. It's a game where you CAN (not to be confused with ARE ENCOURAGED TO) shoot up a bunch of virtual people for no good reason, then take out the cops who try to restore order. There's no real consequence for this behavior. You do it, then you move on and soon you forget about it.

I have nothing against GTA games. I've certainly enjoyed them in the past and I still think that this one looks like an incredible game. Further, I don't think that there's any kind of link between these types of games and mass shootings like this morning's. I just don't think I can handle spending time in a world where there are no consequences, where justice is not served. So please, enjoy GTA V and its expansive, detailed world a little extra for me. Will I pick it up eventually? I very well may. But for now, I hate that I just don't have the urge to play it.

That is understandable duder. Being so close to what transpired has to shake you up a bit and make your have different perspective on things. That being said hopefully in time you'll be ready to enjoy games like GTA V again.

Yeah, that's a notion I can certainly understand.

I'll shoot some cops and stab some hookers for you man.

Hang in there dude and remember the world isn't always shitty!

Sucks, duder. I'll make sure to have extra fun for you.

Glad to hear you're safe. Shitty situation all around.

Damn man, just glad you're alright.

I won't be surprised if people in the news cite GTAV as a possible cause for such violent behavior even though the game isn't out until tomorrow.

Also its good that you didn't get murdered. Keep it up dawg.

Man, sorry to hear. But good to see that you are alright.

No reason to feel bad about it, man. That's a very understandable reaction. Heck, after tragedies that hit close to home, I've been hesitant to even play any kind of videogame, as the frivolity seemed oddly inappropriate. But after a while, things somehow get back to normal and that comfort with them comes back. I'm glad you're alright. Hang in there.

The local news already threw in a "He was a fan of violent video games", so it's already snowballing in the newsrooms, no doubt.

I think your attitude is perfectly understandable, and that gunning down scores of cops might be a little too close to home at the moment. Respect for continuing to understand that people who do choose to play it, aren't somehow making light of real world tragedies or somehow don't care.

It might just be worth playing just to see the big beautiful world. You could always just stick to the speed limit, play some tennis and golf. Do a bit of scuba and just soak up the sights.

For similar reasons I can no longer play Minesweeper.

Now that I think about it, can anyone name why it's okay to shoot virtual things? I'm not starting some jack thompson campaign here, moreso just curious as to what logic people would apply to justify this (It's for fun, okay?). In GTA these virtual people do not hold the same moral implications that real life has, sure, but why?

Eagerly waiting on the replies.

I think people are okay with hurting random civilians in games like GTA is because they are just shallow representations of people. They walk the street in a predetermined pattern and don't appear to be actually characters. They are not full fleshed out characters just polygons. I doubt people would as willing to go to random destruction if the people were painted in a way that showed them are human. Say you knew one person was driving home from a long days work to get to their kid.

It comes down to the level of immersion someone gets into a game too. I never felt like hurting random people in GTA4 but would randomly bulldog slam a passerby in Saint's Row 3 for the heck of it. Some people don't take a game serious to the point that they care about the world or story and thus are always in that trivial mindset towards the world of the game I was for Saint's Row.

I was standing at midnight that Monday night, waiting for GTA V, thinking of all the people affected by the shooting that incurred.

My heart goes out to you. I knew I was about to play a video which allowed me to go on a rampage. And I thought, it's a video game.

I love you all. Hell, I saw a dude, his wife and their baby at my midnight launch.

Peace to you.

Honestly I've gotten a lot less comfortable shooting cops in video games. Any mission that ends up with a shoot out with the cops has me wishing I could have the option to try and sneak/run away. I'm not totally sure why I've started to feel like this.

Yep, missions involving shooting a lot of law enforcement officers have gotten a lot more grim as the games have gotten more and more realistic.

@len1444: Because one is reality and one is not. I think violent media can be a cathartic way to exorcise our basest instincts. GTA is a game where you can act out just about anything you want to do in a safe environment and I think It can be a good way to just unwind and channel your frustrations into.