Female Jeff Gerstmann reviews horror novel.

#1 Edited by Apathylad (3065 posts) -

You might remember that popular thread posted a couple months ago that featured a video of a girl who resembled Jeff (and if you don't remember, you can see the hilarity here). That same person just reviewed a horror novel starring a character named Zach, so could this be the Zach from Deadly Premonition? o_O  And get this: She uses a five-star rating system!
 
 

  
 
Oh, and she really seems to like Giantbomb, because this was under the video:

#2 Posted by jakob187 (21503 posts) -

Yeeeeah.  Ummmm....yeah.  Yeah.  Ummm.  Yeah.  A book.  Yeah.  Ummm...trust me.  Yeah.

#3 Posted by Atomasist (2818 posts) -

 Impostor! Jeff doesn't review books, only games yo.

#4 Posted by cancerdancer (314 posts) -

MAN THE HARPOONS!

#5 Posted by Ratcabbage (246 posts) -
@cancerdancer said:
" MAN THE HARPOONS! "
Awww, dude. Come on, I mean...right? Just...come on, man. Not cool, bro, not cool.
#6 Posted by LiquidPrince (15601 posts) -

Are you her?

#7 Posted by ArchScabby (5809 posts) -

Good review Jeff!... er, I mean akia.

#8 Posted by sixghost (1679 posts) -

I wonder what he opinion on final fantasy is. Only then could we truly know.

#9 Posted by AuthenticM (3671 posts) -

Cracks me up everytime I see her face.

#10 Posted by Xeiphyer (5589 posts) -

Anyone taking odds on how she feels about anime?

#11 Posted by Cube (4366 posts) -

She's got the same way of speaking and facial expressions as Jeff. 
 
So fucking awesome, the love of my life.

#12 Posted by AjayRaz (12389 posts) -

oh god..

#13 Posted by Dalai (6876 posts) -

See, this explains what Jeff did in high school... impregnating the population. 
 
Jeff, meet your long-lost daughter!

#14 Posted by Spiral_Stars (456 posts) -
@LiquidPrince:
#15 Posted by SoothsayerGB (1468 posts) -

Words can not... man...shots the cockgun.

#16 Posted by Death_Unicorn (2826 posts) -
@Dalai said:
" See, this explains what Jeff did in high school... impregnating the population.  Jeff, meet your long-lost daughter! "
This seems like a sensible theory!
#17 Posted by mshaw006 (529 posts) -

Wow, this is one's a lot more like Jeff than the last one. DID SHE JUST SAY GREENVALE? Oh Brinkfield! Brinkfield. Phew.

#18 Posted by LiquidPrince (15601 posts) -
@Spiral_Stars: So you're saying you're Scruffy, the Janitor?
#19 Posted by OmegaPirate (5518 posts) -

coincidence of the century? or have we unravelled Jeff's dark secret as to what he does on weekends?!

#20 Posted by face15 (1244 posts) -
@cancerdancer said:
" MAN THE HARPOONS! "
#21 Posted by Ineedaname (4319 posts) -

I wonder if Jeff has seen this yet.
 
I'm sure he refuses to look for the fear she'll claim benefits or something.

#22 Posted by TwoOneFive (9461 posts) -

what if jeff and her did it and had a baby?

#23 Posted by Delta_Ass (3230 posts) -

Oh man. I uh... I can't dispute you on that. She does totally look like a female Jeff Gerstmann. 
 
It's uncanny.

#24 Posted by Red12b (9044 posts) -
@Ineedaname said:
" I wonder if Jeff has seen this yet.  I'm sure he refuses to look for the fear she'll claim benefits or something. "
Time paradox, our whole universe will implode!!!!!
#25 Posted by Shadow (4965 posts) -
@cancerdancer said:
" MAN THE HARPOONS! "
Oh fuck off
#26 Posted by Red12b (9044 posts) -
@TwoOneFive said:
" what if jeff and her did it and had a baby? "
@Red12b said:
" @Ineedaname said:
" I wonder if Jeff has seen this yet.  I'm sure he refuses to look for the fear she'll claim benefits or something. "
Time paradox, our whole universe will implode!!!!! "
#27 Posted by Apathylad (3065 posts) -
@TwoOneFive said:
" what if jeff and her did it and had a baby? "
Incestuous relationships tend to produce unhealthy offspring.
#28 Posted by Ineedaname (4319 posts) -
@Apathylad said:
" @TwoOneFive said:
" what if jeff and her did it and had a baby? "
Incestuous relationships tend to produce unhealthy offspring. "
You mean wincest right?
 
@Red12b:
Argghh it'd be like dividing by zero.
#29 Posted by JJOR64 (18782 posts) -

Oh god...

#30 Posted by Claude (16251 posts) -

She's my hero. Burned, banned and burned again. Love that line.

#31 Posted by Jeffsekai (7017 posts) -

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

#32 Posted by Zero_ (1970 posts) -

Haha, I love this. She seems pretty cool. But at least we finally know what Jeff Gerstmann does during the weekends when not reviewing games - he's a chick that reviews books.

#33 Posted by Meowayne (6084 posts) -
 
#34 Posted by lordofultima (6183 posts) -

I don't see the resemblance..

#35 Posted by BraveToaster (12590 posts) -

I don't know why I'm creeped out whenever I see her.

#36 Posted by Ghostiet (5153 posts) -

She used to post here, I wonder why she stopped....

Huh.

What the fuck could it possibly be?

Hmmm.

No GODDAMN IDEA, right, guys?

Online
#37 Posted by heat (190 posts) -

What no MMORGP?

#38 Posted by S0ndor (2715 posts) -

This is still just as creepy and uncanny as the first time I saw it.

#39 Posted by Sharpless (441 posts) -

The people saying "MAN THE HARPOONS!" need to -- what's the Internet parlance? "Die in a fire"? At the very least, stop being dicks to her. Overweight people are human beings, you know. And honestly, if you can't learn to love an overweight woman, you, sirs, do not know what you're missing. As someone who has some experience with ladies of the thicker variety, they can be just as worthy of time and effort as their healthier counterparts. So, yeah. Stop being dicks and try thinking about the person you're spitting your insulting memes at. THENKS.
 
And yeah, shit. There's some significant Gerstmanning going on up in this piece. The Windows Movie Maker editing is a big turn-off, though.

#40 Posted by solidlife (874 posts) -

Do not want. 

#41 Posted by Jadeskye (4359 posts) -

I propose we refer to this chick as 'Ladymann' from now on.

#42 Posted by armaan8014 (5253 posts) -

hahaHA!!

#43 Posted by Mac (71 posts) -

Looks more like Alex Navarro than Jeff to me.
#44 Posted by Icemael (6269 posts) -

Gerstwomann 2: Return of the Gerstwomann.

#45 Posted by Apparatus_Unearth (3031 posts) -
@Ineedaname said:
" @Apathylad said:
" @TwoOneFive said:
" what if jeff and her did it and had a baby? "
Incestuous relationships tend to produce unhealthy offspring. "
You mean wincest right?
 
@Red12b: Argghh it'd be like dividing by zero. "
Usage of the word Wincest means you win the thread. I laughed for about three minutes straight.
#46 Posted by Lemoncookie01 (1667 posts) -

Jeff likes to be a ''lady'' on the weekends.

#47 Posted by b33 (407 posts) -

so... about headshots....

#48 Posted by JeffGoldblum (3657 posts) -
@Red12b said:
" @Ineedaname said:
" I wonder if Jeff has seen this yet.  I'm sure he refuses to look for the fear she'll claim benefits or something. "
Time paradox, our whole universe will implode!!!!! "
Or maybe they will just faint. Doc isn't sure.

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