Weapons-Grade Gears Gear

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Posted by Ryan (1263 posts) -
What freaks me out is how field-ready this thing looks.
Here's a sterling example of the hoary old adage about life imitating abject awesomeness. Aside from alpha-male behavior laced with homoerotic overtones, nothing sums up Gears of War's blunt-force attitude like the Lancer. Seriously, is there anything ass-kickier than a wicked machine gun with a friggin' chainsaw strapped on the front? As you can tell from this video that CrunchGear dug up, it's even better in real life. We're not talking about some kind of fancy Nerf gun you'd keep in the bottom drawer of your desk, but an actual AR-15 with a functioning chainsaw blade bolted on the front, undoubtedly by a man whose deep commitment to being an unmitigated bad-ass makes my life look like a 24/7 stuffed-animal tea party. Pass me a razzleberry cupcake, Mr. Bearingsworth!

Check out the video for yourself to see some pumpkins get treated like the skulls of some feeble Locust grunts, and don't try to deny the fact that you too would cackle like a madman if you saw this in person.

  
Staff
#1 Posted by Ryan (1263 posts) -
What freaks me out is how field-ready this thing looks.
Here's a sterling example of the hoary old adage about life imitating abject awesomeness. Aside from alpha-male behavior laced with homoerotic overtones, nothing sums up Gears of War's blunt-force attitude like the Lancer. Seriously, is there anything ass-kickier than a wicked machine gun with a friggin' chainsaw strapped on the front? As you can tell from this video that CrunchGear dug up, it's even better in real life. We're not talking about some kind of fancy Nerf gun you'd keep in the bottom drawer of your desk, but an actual AR-15 with a functioning chainsaw blade bolted on the front, undoubtedly by a man whose deep commitment to being an unmitigated bad-ass makes my life look like a 24/7 stuffed-animal tea party. Pass me a razzleberry cupcake, Mr. Bearingsworth!

Check out the video for yourself to see some pumpkins get treated like the skulls of some feeble Locust grunts, and don't try to deny the fact that you too would cackle like a madman if you saw this in person.

  
Staff
#2 Posted by KimFidler (311 posts) -

I would like to do lunch with this gentleman.

#3 Posted by Bass (692 posts) -

that's a little frightening.

#4 Posted by daniel_beck_90 (3159 posts) -

that is what I call a traditional lancer

#5 Posted by MrMuise (227 posts) -

What kind of manly man puts the safety on? Real many men eat safe for breakfast and crap out danger for brunch.

#6 Edited by RodneythePom (87 posts) -

Well at least if the commies ever invade, our backwoods militias are armed to the teeth.

#7 Posted by AspiringAndy (332 posts) -

hahaha, whatta fanboy.

#8 Posted by Jeff (3577 posts) -

I love how his advancing-while-firing stance is super serious, but it all goes to hell when he tries to start up his silly chainsaw.

Staff
#9 Edited by DualReaver (3882 posts) -

How much are they, and where can I get one? I have some Koffings to kill.

#10 Posted by CleverLoginName (678 posts) -

That'll be standard issue one day.

#11 Posted by ewingsquadron (33 posts) -

Is a modification like that even legal?

#12 Posted by HistoryInRust (6317 posts) -
Jeff said:
"It all goes to hell when he tries to start up his silly chainsaw."
That's what she said.
#13 Edited by Aaox (1657 posts) -

Okay... So someone took a CHAINSAW and attched it to a ASSAULT RIFLE. I only remember someone taking a Toys R Us 'Happy fun times chainsaw!' and a Nerf 'Foam shooting bullets!' gun. And That was pretty awesome. Drawback to this gun? (Aside from the fact that if you slip while you're holding it and manage to fall on it in such a way as to re-enact that clown's death in Dead Rising ) Where does the petrol go?

#14 Posted by Captain_Fookup (1519 posts) -

It isn't a chainsaw unless it's a Stihl.

#15 Posted by License_To_Bill (792 posts) -

Do want.

#16 Edited by Wright (637 posts) -

He looks so playful when he goes to chainsaw those pumpkins. There's also a vid where he tries to cut down a tree which makes the chainsaw seem even more silly.

#17 Posted by LeBart (302 posts) -

I've lost all faith in humanity.

#18 Posted by artofwar420 (6290 posts) -

The laugh makes the video.

#19 Posted by ThePhenomenal1 (467 posts) -

don't fuck with that dude

#20 Posted by I_am_Lono (193 posts) -

That video is a prime example of why inbreeding is illegal.

#21 Posted by Red (5995 posts) -

Dude, I'm surprised the government hasn't erased all data of this ever existing: they need some secret weapons.

#22 Posted by punkxblaze (2985 posts) -

This is silly not just in form, but function. The chainsaw latched to the front would throw off the balance of the gun, especially lacking anything significant to grab on to, totally fucking your aim (As if it's not hard enough to get a good shot out of a rifle unless you're trained.). Secondly, the chainsaw is useless holding the gun as a gun, because there's no pressure downwards, you'd have to completely switch your hand positioning for it to do anything more than nick someone or slice off a finger at most.

The game Lancer is at least somewhat more plausible, thanks to it's more central positioning of the chainsaw and the 'in chansaw' grip.

#23 Posted by VilhelmNielsen (1735 posts) -

That'll teach them terrorists!

#24 Posted by ahoodedfigure (4240 posts) -

Take that, pumpkins!

Personally, I'm not sure I'd want to be trying to start up my chainsaw when I wind up in melee, or leave it running so people know where I am.  That, and if I hit the dirt, break the chain, and it flies up into my face, gouging out my eye, I imagine that might sap my will to fight.

The halo kid bugged me more, though. This just seems like a fun stunt.

Personally, I'm all for tea parties!

#25 Posted by Kazona (3068 posts) -

Ok, so who wants to take a guess when we'll be seeing this thing on Discovery's Future Weapons?

#26 Posted by Prime20 (168 posts) -

Good old red neck ingenuity, gotta love it.

#27 Posted by Arsenal86 (123 posts) -

No fucking way that is imense why do the UK army not have that gun.

#28 Posted by Death_Burnout (3797 posts) -

Haha yeah it was all good till he starts up the saw.

I'm still actually scared of chainsaws, more so when they are pointed at me, so, i dont want to be at the other end of one of those, but i wouldnt feel bad if i was in front if him though...

#29 Posted by ImperiousRix (2963 posts) -

I woulda liked for him to attempt to start it up and have it jam
Which would be proceeded by a hearty "AWWW C'MON!!!"

#30 Posted by Mann_uk (73 posts) -

true badass

#31 Posted by Scooper (7881 posts) -

You call that a gun? THIS is a gun!

  
#32 Posted by zityz (2360 posts) -

Well that makes the French 1700 ol' Musket with The Pike at the end look like a Red Rider BB gun with a plastic knife ductaped to the end. 

#33 Posted by Endogene (4741 posts) -

We actually have a member here on GB who did that also with a gun he owns, I dont recall his name but he did mention that when he uploaded some pics of it to a gun forum he was told that it was illigal to do with the type of gun he owned and that he better not post those pics around.

#34 Posted by marcusfriendly (87 posts) -

It looks scary.

#35 Posted by MordeaniisChaos (5730 posts) -

"I love how his advancing-while-firing stance is super serious, but it all goes to hell when he tries to start up his silly chainsaw."
I think that was the point his child side kicked in. He looked giddy lol. PLus he looked pretty ungraceful just to begin with. I think he just wanted to chainsaw some damn pumpkins into oblivion.

#36 Posted by BinaryDragon (638 posts) -

That is a little bit Awesome.

I do wonder how long before some country actually makes a real lancer. Look at what happened with the Halo armour.

#37 Posted by SynAzrael (41 posts) -

Only problem is that a real lancer would be unwieldy and awkward, I would guess.  Not the best for actual warfare against....not pumpkins.

#38 Posted by Charleslegrand (186 posts) -

Well the woman watching sounds impressed!

#39 Posted by Kralle (101 posts) -

White trash lol

#40 Posted by Pibo47 (3166 posts) -

OMFG THIS IS THE GREATEST THING EVER!!! I NEED NOA!!!

#41 Posted by Sparky_Buzzsaw (6199 posts) -

Holy crap!  Redneck ingenuity kicks ass!  Now if only someone would get around to building me a real Warthog, I'd be a happy camper!

Moderator
#42 Posted by wait (54 posts) -

way to let the airborne to figure out a way to strap a chainsaw to a civilian hk417

#43 Posted by Drakulla (13 posts) -

This guy has wayyy tooo much time on his hands. Can you say psycho chainsaw murdering sniper.

#44 Posted by Farmer (328 posts) -

Promote that man!

#45 Posted by Irishjohn (581 posts) -

That is creepy.

#46 Posted by DeanJParker (54 posts) -

I cant say what I want to.... so I'll say nothing

#47 Posted by TwoOneFive (9459 posts) -

i would carry that around like when Homer got that gun and was using it to turn on tv and the light switch!

#48 Posted by TaintedSun (154 posts) -

Wow, way to take what could have been an awesome video and make it suck.

#49 Posted by jonnyp (193 posts) -

What's sad is that guy chose to build that ridiculous weapon instead of feed his 17 kids..


Wait a second, thank you darwinism!
#50 Posted by lamegame621 (975 posts) -

amazing.

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