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Added by Brad Shoemaker on July 1, 2009

Apparently it's all StarCraft, all the time this week. I just caught sight of an amazing listing on Craigslist (San Francisco Bay Area edition) from a guy named ByunTae offering by-the-hour StarCraft lessons. He sure isn't shy about offering his qualifications:

I have advised and coached many professional gamers such as Im Jae Dong, Park Myung Soo, Ma Jae Yoon, and more. Boxer and I were great friends until he started using my dropships to gain his fame. I started training other players to be on par with Boxer and eventually surpassing Boxer. He is no longer the best player thanks to my contribution to rest of the players.


Um, yeah. OK! So what will your $25/hour (or $35 for advanced lessons) get you? Here's what ByunTae will be teaching.

  • Micro management (unit management) 
  • Macro management (unit production and economy) 
  • Map specific strategies 
  • Basic and Advanced strategies and build orders for all three races. 
  • In-game bugs to be used to your advantage such as unit stack, stop lurkers, etc. 
  • Counter strategies and perfect attack timings. 
  • Learn Korean lango, like "chobo" "gosu" "ww" etc 
  • Basic Korean to communicate with Koreans on battle.net 
  • Unit details, their size and their pros/cons against other units 
  • My signature cannon rush along with my signature cheese rush (boxer learned it from me)

Oh yeah, there's always the "Chance to become a professional gamer in Korea - Celebrity status, especially for foreigners." Don't forget about that part. Then again, with madness like this to look forward to, maybe you could stand to brush up on your skills.

 





Filed under : StarCraft

58 Comments

FlamingHobo
on July 1, 2009
I'm not paying $25 an hour so someone can force feed me their playstyle of a game.
Honestly, I find it pointless the lengths some people will go to be good at games.

Edit: Nice 100th post Brad.

The_A_Drain
on July 1, 2009
Holy. Fucking. Shit.

I'm not sure if I want, or I want to kill myself after hearing this.

DerekDanahy
on July 1, 2009
That's pretty ridiculous.

Pie
on July 1, 2009
Is it free?

WitchHunter_Z
on July 1, 2009
Wow... amazingly I bet people will actually pay for this crap.

Inf225
on July 1, 2009

This is awesome... but I have a question... who the hell is boxer?


Krenor
on July 1, 2009
I'm in!

or am I?...

fillmoejoe
on July 1, 2009
He's Korean so it's official.

NoXious
on July 1, 2009

I love how he stabs at Boxer constantly, making claims of him owning certain strategies etc. As if he patented it all XD


NickM
on July 1, 2009
@Pie said:
" Is it free? "
Is it personalized?

The_A_Drain
on July 1, 2009
@Inf225 said:
"

This is awesome... but I have a question... who the hell is boxer?

"




babblinmule
on July 1, 2009
The more I learn about professional starcraft, the more i lose faith in humanity....

phlegms
on July 1, 2009
Woah, my mind just got blown a little bit..

Seraphim84
on July 1, 2009
For the record, ByunTae (the guy's "name") translates to pervert in Korean.  So, um, watch for the chloroform with this guy.

stinky
on July 1, 2009
I'm offering lessons in 2600 version of Pitfall.

Topics include :
Jumping, Jumping over logs, Jumping on Alligator heads, and Jumping to avoid tar pits.

Advanced techniques include  3 consecutive alligator head jumps, as well as knowing when to grab a vine.

pornstorestiffi
on July 1, 2009
People can make money of everything these days.

PJ
on July 1, 2009
@stinky said:
"I'm offering lessons in 2600 version of Pitfall.

Topics include :
Jumping, Jumping over logs, Jumping on Alligator heads, and Jumping to avoid tar pits.

Advanced techniques include  3 consecutive alligator head jumps, as well as knowing when to grab a vine.
"

Seriously? I'm in! But I will only pay you no more then $150/hour.

Jeff
on July 1, 2009
@stinky said:
" I'm offering lessons in 2600 version of Pitfall.

Topics include :
Jumping, Jumping over logs, Jumping on Alligator heads, and Jumping to avoid tar pits.

Advanced techniques include  3 consecutive alligator head jumps, as well as knowing when to grab a vine.
"
Do you teach the elusive "just run to the left" technique I've heard so much about?

Jambones
on July 1, 2009
@NoXious said:
"

I love how he stabs at Boxer constantly, making claims of him owning certain strategies etc. As if he patented it all XD

"
For the advanced classes, he's even offering a bootleg of Boxer's DVD imported from Korea... It runs deep, apparently.

Grim_Fandango
on July 1, 2009
I prefer to make my own strategies, using somebody elses means if you come up against them, they will know how to counter it.

Experiementing is the best way to learn and strategize.


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