Diesel, the absence of heroes, and what I haven't been playing.

oh boy. here we go. 
 

 i totally forgot the c in absence, but whatever. 
 
  
so apart from the fact that i can never decide what be my Game of the Year, i don't think i'll be doing any GOTY stuff apart from a list. isn't it great that the games i've been playing lately aren't games that were released this year?  
 
productivity. i'm not good at it.   
 

WHICH ONE OF YOU IS ROLLIN' WITH ME? 

first up on the list.. Vin Diesel's The Wheelman. apart from the fact that this game isn't actually called Vin Diesel's The Wheelman (VIn Diesel WHEELMAN, instead) this game is dope as shit. i feel like that this game was written off pretty fast when it came out. probably with good reason, too. the on-foot shooting stuff is pretty lousy, it's real easy to get arrested and there are some really weird quirks when it comes to some of the game mechanics, but it's still a lot of fun.  
 
to me, it feels like some sort of weird mix between Stuntman, DRIV3R and Just Cause. there's lots of chaotic fast paced chase scenes with a lot of destruction and stuff blowing up everywhere with just the right amount of jank, along with constant moments where you jump from car-to-car to steal it in mid air.. this ability is called Air Jack, and
stop looking at me like that, Mr. Diesel. 
 it's probably why you've heard of the game apart from Mr. Diesel's affiliation if anything. pulling off an air jack is a lot of fun to watch, especially when the driver of the car just decides to plow the car into a bunch of destructible objects on the sidewalk, or into some innocent dude on his bike.  
 
i'm not really sure what the story even is. you play as Vin Diesel, who plays Milo Burlik, who acts like a Wheelman, when he's actually a CIA man from "The Agency" who was sent in to take care of an international threat or something.. you're taking on jobs from a bunch of gang lords in the city who are instantly forgettable not only for their personalities, but because there's like 60 dudes in the story and they all look the same to me. although, i don't think the story really matters in the least. they're just good excuses to drive a huge-ass truck or air jack an ambulance or something.  
 
in addition to that, the air jack stuff can be pretty limited. there was this one mission where i was chasing a train, shooting the cars off with my gnarly-ass pistol and the dudes in the train would constantly shoot out my tires and set my car on fire. there were guys chasing me in cars, but the game didn't allow me to air jack them because they were gang members. y'know. gotta show some respect for the dudes trying to ram me off the road.  
 
what kind of sense does that make? 
it's nothing to write home. it was good for the 20 dollars that i paid just to flick the right stick to see my car swerve into another car, only to watch the car i hit do approximately 10 000 flips in the air before exploding. Vin Diesel's presence is still weird, but whenever i crash my bike into a traffic car and fly about 30 000 feet down the street and lose no health, at least it'll be justified because i'm playing as Vin Diesel.  
  

Your hair looks like shit! 

No More Heroes is great. Travis Touchdown is great. Travis Touchdown's name is great. slashing dudes in half only for them to yell "MY SPLEEN!" is great. collecting coconuts in a minigame.. isn't as great, but No More Heroes is fucking awesome.  
 
i'm late to the party, i know but better late than never! i managed to snag a copy of No More Heroes: Heroes Paradise which is the HD port to the PS3 with added Move support and extra boss battles. i'd imagine that they didn't make many copies of this game, so i'm happy i got a hold of it. after admiring the absurdity and excessive gore that No More Heroes brought whenever it came out, i was still left saddened by the fact that i didn't own a Wii. however, time's changing and i'm grateful that this game even out on the PS Triple.  
 
Travis Touchdown is an idiot, and I wouldn't have it any other way. 
 
anyway, this game is wonderful. i don't remember the last game that constantly made me smile like No More Heroes did, and continues to do. the entire game is so weird, and full of crazy, colorful characters. i've been playing with the six-axis controller and it's cool and all, but i only hear good things about the Move support, along with the game's original controls back when it was on the Wii. the music is also pretty awesome
  
however, with that said, i feel like i don't understand this game. Suda 51's mind is so crazy and confusing, that i can never tell what's deliberate or not. the open world stuff is so terrible and such a pain to use. when i look at the game's wonderfully done combat, it makes me wonder if the open world stuff was done bad on purpose. some of the dialogue boxes are also a total pain to navigate, considering it shows like five words on the screen at once. it's all dumb, and it makes me wonder if i'm missing some something, or some huge joke is flying right over my head.  
 
regardless, it's still funny and a total blast to play. the dialogue is great, especially when it comes to Travis, and that one employer who always bows down to "THE GOD OF [insert job that you're doing]". i'm having a great time with it, and i'm almost done, too! i have one more person to kill before i'm the #1 ranked assassin! not to mention Sylvia's gonna do it with me!  
 
..she's not gonna do it with me, isn't she? 
 

What I haven't been playing. 

Skyrim.  
 
yea, i haven't been playing much Skyrim. i bought it, and it's pretty spectacular, but i haven't been putting the time into it. i'm having an absolute blast setting bad dudes on fire, and exploring caves and stuff, but it hasn't grabbed it as much as it did with other people. i've probably put in a maximum of.. five hours at the most. i spent most of my time with Saints Row  3, where i put at least 30 hours into it before finishing the main story.  
 
it almost seems like i'm unintentionally trying to prevent Skyrim from being in my Xbox. i started playing Ninja Gaiden II again, i booted up Deadly Premonition again for some reason (which i still didn't finish) and i ordered Persona 3 and 4 on Amazon when i have more than enough games to play.  
  
*sigh* i should finish more of my games. i still haven't even played Resistance 3 yet, and that game is supposed to be awesome.  
  

If you weren't playing Skyrim.. then what were you doing this whole time, you idiot?  

stuff like this:  
 
  
  

In other news... 

  • Ninja Gaiden 3 looks questionable, but fun. Dead or Alive 5 looks dope. 
  • i finished Cowboy Bebop! a near-perfect ending. i really enjoyed it. 
  • i have confirmed over the past week that Kill Bill is still an awesome movie
  • the new Black Keys album is wonderful. 
  • here is a Protomen reference to further prove that my title may or may not have been an unintentional Protomen reference for Three0neFive's enjoyment 
thank you for reading! it's not very often that i blog, but i hope you kind of enjoyed it?  
39 Comments
40 Comments
Edited by AjayRaz

oh boy. here we go. 
 

 i totally forgot the c in absence, but whatever. 
 
  
so apart from the fact that i can never decide what be my Game of the Year, i don't think i'll be doing any GOTY stuff apart from a list. isn't it great that the games i've been playing lately aren't games that were released this year?  
 
productivity. i'm not good at it.   
 

WHICH ONE OF YOU IS ROLLIN' WITH ME? 

first up on the list.. Vin Diesel's The Wheelman. apart from the fact that this game isn't actually called Vin Diesel's The Wheelman (VIn Diesel WHEELMAN, instead) this game is dope as shit. i feel like that this game was written off pretty fast when it came out. probably with good reason, too. the on-foot shooting stuff is pretty lousy, it's real easy to get arrested and there are some really weird quirks when it comes to some of the game mechanics, but it's still a lot of fun.  
 
to me, it feels like some sort of weird mix between Stuntman, DRIV3R and Just Cause. there's lots of chaotic fast paced chase scenes with a lot of destruction and stuff blowing up everywhere with just the right amount of jank, along with constant moments where you jump from car-to-car to steal it in mid air.. this ability is called Air Jack, and
stop looking at me like that, Mr. Diesel. 
 it's probably why you've heard of the game apart from Mr. Diesel's affiliation if anything. pulling off an air jack is a lot of fun to watch, especially when the driver of the car just decides to plow the car into a bunch of destructible objects on the sidewalk, or into some innocent dude on his bike.  
 
i'm not really sure what the story even is. you play as Vin Diesel, who plays Milo Burlik, who acts like a Wheelman, when he's actually a CIA man from "The Agency" who was sent in to take care of an international threat or something.. you're taking on jobs from a bunch of gang lords in the city who are instantly forgettable not only for their personalities, but because there's like 60 dudes in the story and they all look the same to me. although, i don't think the story really matters in the least. they're just good excuses to drive a huge-ass truck or air jack an ambulance or something.  
 
in addition to that, the air jack stuff can be pretty limited. there was this one mission where i was chasing a train, shooting the cars off with my gnarly-ass pistol and the dudes in the train would constantly shoot out my tires and set my car on fire. there were guys chasing me in cars, but the game didn't allow me to air jack them because they were gang members. y'know. gotta show some respect for the dudes trying to ram me off the road.  
 
what kind of sense does that make? 
it's nothing to write home. it was good for the 20 dollars that i paid just to flick the right stick to see my car swerve into another car, only to watch the car i hit do approximately 10 000 flips in the air before exploding. Vin Diesel's presence is still weird, but whenever i crash my bike into a traffic car and fly about 30 000 feet down the street and lose no health, at least it'll be justified because i'm playing as Vin Diesel.  
  

Your hair looks like shit! 

No More Heroes is great. Travis Touchdown is great. Travis Touchdown's name is great. slashing dudes in half only for them to yell "MY SPLEEN!" is great. collecting coconuts in a minigame.. isn't as great, but No More Heroes is fucking awesome.  
 
i'm late to the party, i know but better late than never! i managed to snag a copy of No More Heroes: Heroes Paradise which is the HD port to the PS3 with added Move support and extra boss battles. i'd imagine that they didn't make many copies of this game, so i'm happy i got a hold of it. after admiring the absurdity and excessive gore that No More Heroes brought whenever it came out, i was still left saddened by the fact that i didn't own a Wii. however, time's changing and i'm grateful that this game even out on the PS Triple.  
 
Travis Touchdown is an idiot, and I wouldn't have it any other way. 
 
anyway, this game is wonderful. i don't remember the last game that constantly made me smile like No More Heroes did, and continues to do. the entire game is so weird, and full of crazy, colorful characters. i've been playing with the six-axis controller and it's cool and all, but i only hear good things about the Move support, along with the game's original controls back when it was on the Wii. the music is also pretty awesome
  
however, with that said, i feel like i don't understand this game. Suda 51's mind is so crazy and confusing, that i can never tell what's deliberate or not. the open world stuff is so terrible and such a pain to use. when i look at the game's wonderfully done combat, it makes me wonder if the open world stuff was done bad on purpose. some of the dialogue boxes are also a total pain to navigate, considering it shows like five words on the screen at once. it's all dumb, and it makes me wonder if i'm missing some something, or some huge joke is flying right over my head.  
 
regardless, it's still funny and a total blast to play. the dialogue is great, especially when it comes to Travis, and that one employer who always bows down to "THE GOD OF [insert job that you're doing]". i'm having a great time with it, and i'm almost done, too! i have one more person to kill before i'm the #1 ranked assassin! not to mention Sylvia's gonna do it with me!  
 
..she's not gonna do it with me, isn't she? 
 

What I haven't been playing. 

Skyrim.  
 
yea, i haven't been playing much Skyrim. i bought it, and it's pretty spectacular, but i haven't been putting the time into it. i'm having an absolute blast setting bad dudes on fire, and exploring caves and stuff, but it hasn't grabbed it as much as it did with other people. i've probably put in a maximum of.. five hours at the most. i spent most of my time with Saints Row  3, where i put at least 30 hours into it before finishing the main story.  
 
it almost seems like i'm unintentionally trying to prevent Skyrim from being in my Xbox. i started playing Ninja Gaiden II again, i booted up Deadly Premonition again for some reason (which i still didn't finish) and i ordered Persona 3 and 4 on Amazon when i have more than enough games to play.  
  
*sigh* i should finish more of my games. i still haven't even played Resistance 3 yet, and that game is supposed to be awesome.  
  

If you weren't playing Skyrim.. then what were you doing this whole time, you idiot?  

stuff like this:  
 
  
  

In other news... 

  • Ninja Gaiden 3 looks questionable, but fun. Dead or Alive 5 looks dope. 
  • i finished Cowboy Bebop! a near-perfect ending. i really enjoyed it. 
  • i have confirmed over the past week that Kill Bill is still an awesome movie
  • the new Black Keys album is wonderful. 
  • here is a Protomen reference to further prove that my title may or may not have been an unintentional Protomen reference for Three0neFive's enjoyment 
thank you for reading! it's not very often that i blog, but i hope you kind of enjoyed it?  
Posted by Video_Game_King

Wait, you don't own a Wii? GO OUT AND GET ONE, DAMN IT!

Posted by Apathylad

I haven't been playing Skyrim either! I liked No More Heroes, and I was one of the few who bought it the same week it launched. Good times. I haven't looked at what the PS3 version has that the Wii version does not, though.

Posted by Little_Socrates

Good blog. I wish Vin Diesel were involved in more video games. Based on his experience with D&D, I'd say he at least kind of gets it.

Posted by MoonlightMoth

MOE

Posted by AjayRaz
@Video_Game_King: hell no. if i ever need one, i could probably borrow one from someone that i know since they never use them.  
@Apathylad: pretty much Travis will just have a dream after you save your game and you just fight assassins in your dreams. apparently they're supposed to be NMH2 bosses.  
@CrazyManAndy: :(  
@Little_Socrates: thank you! despite his involvement in Wheelman still being real weird, it's kind of funny and cool (since i actually like Vin Diesel) to see him running around. his voice sounds so weird in that game though. it's like they cranked up some sort of effect on the microphone to make him sound like he just got out of bed.  
@AllIsHeresy:  STRAWBERRY ON THE SHORTCAKE
Posted by Three0neFive

I thought the title was a Protomen reference. Needless to say, I'm disappointed. :'(

Posted by Video_Game_King

But what if they don't own the games I tell you to play? You'll look like an asshole if you own games to a console you don't own. (I guess that's why people hated Microsoft during the Xbox 360 launch.)

Posted by AjayRaz
@Three0neFive: what. you might want to check that "In other news..." section before you accuse me of such treachery.  
@Video_Game_King: i look like an asshole anyway because the box for DRIV3R is up on my shelf! besides, i own a GameCube game and i don't own a GameCube so i'm used to it.
Posted by Video_Game_King

Even more reason to buy that Wii: play GameCube games (unless it's the newer model).

Posted by AjayRaz
@Video_Game_King: okay, fine. my friend's GameCube is on the shelf because he let me borrow it. there. now i have no reason to buy a Wii.. except.. 
Posted by Video_Game_King
Posted by Cloudenvy

Man, sometimes I wish I would've enjoyed Cowboy Bebop as much as other people seem to have. : (

Online
Posted by Three0neFive
@AjayRaz: AJAYRAZ IS BEST RAZ
Posted by aurahack

LSD

Posted by AjayRaz
@Cloudenvy: it's not mindblowingly amazing (though it's very close), but it's really enjoyable. the world that they've created, the wonderful characters, the great animation and humor.. all of it makes up for a fun show to watch. i don't really watch anime but that show has a nice spot in my heart. bang.
Posted by Cloudenvy

@AjayRaz: Hmmm, maybe that was the problem for me. I never really liked any of the characters besides Spike.

Online
Posted by AjayRaz
@Cloudenvy: Spike alone should have done you good, but i guess it didn't help you much with the episodes focusing on other characters. i liked everyone, especially Spike and Ed. every time Ed was on-screen, i was cracking up because they way that they animated her was perfect. not to mention the voice actor (in the English dub, anyway) fit perfectly.  
@aurahack: so tripy lol dam man  
Posted by Cloudenvy

@AjayRaz: I'm one of the rare people who hate Ed....

Please don't hurt me. : (

Online
Posted by AhmadMetallic

No no, you're not gonna sell me on Wheelman, that ship has sailed and sunk in the north pole. 
 

it almost seems like i'm unintentionally trying to prevent Skyrim from being in my Xbox. i started playing Ninja Gaiden II again, i booted up Deadly Premonition again for some reason (which i still didn't finish) and i ordered Persona 3 and 4 on Amazon when i have more than enough games to play.  
I really hate when a truly great game simply is not growing on me and I start avoiding playing it. I hope you'll get the Skyrim vibe all up in your shit soon. 
 

  • the new Black Keys album is wonderful. 
And why is that?
Posted by AjayRaz
@AhmadMetallic: aww. you should at least give Wheelman a shot if you're into sub-par open world games! although.. after the first mission, you've probably seen all that the game has to offer.  
 
yea, the same happened with me and all of Rockstar's recent games. i stopped playing LA Noire a couple of hours in because i think i had my fill of it. Red Dead on the other hand.. the ending got spoiled for me so i felt absolutely no motivation to continue playing which isn't usually the case for me. i hope Skyrim will click with me again if i ever feel like going on an adventure. 
 
El Camino is lovely. i'm not someone who's good with music but it's probably the first album i've bought since that stupid Tony Yayo album i bought in like.. 2005 for some reason. it's lively and catchy, not to mention it's the first album in a long time that i've listened to the entire way through in one go. 
Posted by onimonkii

car melee

CAR MELEE

Posted by Hot_Karl

@Video_Game_King said:

Wait, you don't own a Wii? GO OUT AND GET ONE, DAMN IT!

Eh, I don't own a Wii either. Most of the games I've cared about that weren't Nintendo exclusives came out on other platforms already.

I was wondering about that NMH port. I should probably get another game that uses the Move, even though I've yet to touch Dead Space Extraction, RE 5 Gold, or much of HotD: Overkill Extended.

Posted by AjayRaz
@onimonkii: yo check this game out THE CARS ARE RAMMING INTO EACH OTHER and holy shit that car just exploded with ONE BULLET TO THE HOOD 
@VinceNotVance: RE5 sounds like it would be a nightmare to play with the move. NMH is lovely, though. it plays just fine with the controller, but i imagine it must be so much better with a move controller 
Posted by Hailinel

@Apathylad said:

I haven't been playing Skyrim either! I liked No More Heroes, and I was one of the few who bought it the same week it launched. Good times. I haven't looked at what the PS3 version has that the Wii version does not, though.

Pretty much what he said, aside from the not playing Skyrim part.

I played a lot of Skyrim for a few days, and then Saints Row: The Third happened. I have not felt the urge to go dragon-hunting since then.

Online
Posted by Bigheart711

Back at my campus lounge for the past quarter, I've played way more Saints Row III than I did with Skyrim.

Also, which boss did you have the hardest time with in NMH? The first few times with #2 (Bad Girl) were frustrating as hell for me. I thought #1 would be the worst one, but it turned out easier than #2 (Still a great game, though).

Posted by AjayRaz
@Bigheart711: i'm not done yet, but it was for sure Bad Girl. stuck on that boss for a good while. it was that, and Shinobu gave me some trouble too.  
 
it was such a good feeling when i beat Bad Girl, though. WHY DID I ATTACK HER WHEN SHE WAS CRYING OH GOD
Posted by Zolkowski

I share your pain with a lack of skyrim. If I don't have a lot of time, there is no motivation to play it as it gives the seemingly notion to require atleast 4 hours of free time to play or it will leave you wanting more. If you cannot find the time to play it thoroughly though I'd at least recommend getting through the main story as it's quite enthralling.

Posted by BraveToaster

I thought that this blog was about clothes. Either way, it's still a good read.

Posted by AjayRaz
@Axxol: thank you, monsieur toaster!  
@Zolkowski: i have tons of time to play Skyrim. trust me. it's more of me playing other games (more recently games i've played through several times) rather than games that need to be played, such as Skyrim and Resistance 3 (which i haven't even started yet.)  

with that said, i think i should at least get through the main quest (like you said) before i leave Skyrim in the dust in favor for games like Deadly Premonition or Ninja Gaiden II.
Posted by Bruce

Ah Travis, that masturbatory cliche.

Edited by Black_Rose

I've always wanted to try Wheelman, that and Stranglehold are two games that look silly yet enjoyable and addictive. Glad you' enjoyed it, at least somewhat.

NMH is a great game, though the world felt lifeless, it's too bad they didn't fix that on the port because that, for me, is what kept it from being truly amazing.

Posted by GunstarRed

I think I'm gonna play the Vin Diesels The Wheelman next. Agree completely about everything you say about Bebop/Ed annnd Kill Bill is still awesome isn't it. I think I might be the only person that thinks the pregnancy test scene at the end of two is the best moment in all of those films. and I totally just bought Muramasa earlier!

Online
Posted by AjayRaz
@Black_Rose: i would think more highly of it if it wasn't for that. i would have prefered a menu as opposed to a badly designed open world element that's a pain (and hassle, at times) to navigate. also, please play Wheelman, even if it's the demo. the demo pretty much shows everything that the game has to offer-- except there's more explosions and chaos in the actual game. it's a lot of fun, especially for the price i got it for. i'd say it was worth buying over DiRT 3 (which i originally planned to buy)  
 
@GunstarRed: Vin Diesel's Wheelmans staring Vin Diesel as Vin Diesel is probably something you'd really like or absolutely hate if i can get your tastes right. if you have a thing for jank in sub-par open world games with no disregard for physics or how cars operate, it should be right up your alley.  
 
also, is Muramasa as fun and beautiful as it looks in videos? 
Posted by GunstarRed

@AjayRaz: Nah, all games on the Wii look like shit. (I bought it online so I don't know yet, but I'm sure it does)

I have a feeling the Vin Dieselness of it will overcome any problems I have with it. Unrelated, I think Fast Five might be my favourite movie this year. I hope Paul Walker realizes at some point that starring in his own terrible video game will do his career wonders.

Online
Posted by AjayRaz
@GunstarRed: that scene with the huge safe is god damn magical. i love everything about that movie. 
Posted by Black_Rose

@AjayRaz: You should try to play NMH2, it scraps the whole open world aspect and replaces it with some cool retro minigames, plus you can play as that black high school girl whose name i forgot.

Also, Muramasa ain't that great. It looks amazing, truly beautiful. But the gameplay is one-note. It can be fun but with time it gets very monotonous.

Posted by AjayRaz
@Black_Rose: i've been thinking that i'll just buy NMH2 and borrow a Wii from someone since they seem to go unused. i hope it's just as good. also, i figured that Muramasa's gameplay wasn't anything special but it still looks like something that i could have a good time with. the art looks so beautiful. however.. i think Odin Sphere will fill my need for any sort of Vanillaware game stuff / artwork. 
Posted by TheHBK
You must be talkin about Big Daddy Cool Diesel
Posted by AjayRaz
@TheHBK: not in my entire life would i have thought that my title would have also meant Kevin Nash. 
 
thank you. so much.