I want to start this blog by saying one thing, damn you steam sales (and by definition Humble Bundle pay what you want deals!) My problem is that my steam account is becoming horribly bloated with games I've bought on sale for less than $10. Screw backlogs at this point, my steam library is a landfill full of decent games I will never play.

I look at the steam sales on The Swapper and Gunpoint and think to myself, hey those games are sure to be good. Then I think to myself, I've just bought 5 other games in the last sale that I have yet to touch (State of Decay, Zeno Clash 2, Trine 2, Shadow Warrior and System Shock 2). Finally my head explodes while contemplating the 200 out of 357 games on my steam account I have yet to even play. That's not even considering the 3DS games I have yet to finish and games I've bought on the consoles yet to complete.

When did gaming become such a nightmare for me? Oh that's right, it's when I got a job and could buy all the garbage I ever wanted. I've mentioned this backlog stuff in the past, but I think I know what the final piece of the puzzle is. Turns out the childhood dream of buying as many games as I ever wanted backfired horribly to the point that I enjoy games less now. They say money doesn't make you happy, but perhaps in a lot of cases it makes you unhappy. When I was a kid, back when buying a new game (or even a preowned game from a bargain bin) was the most exciting shit ever, gaming was at it's best. The saying "Less is more" is no joke. It's time to stop filling my life with garbage and focus on the stuff that matters.

Focus, it's how we get shit done and done well. You can't do well at anything if you are trying to do everything. As a kid you are forced to focus on what you have because the only time you get new stuff is on your birthday and Christmas over the course of a year. It forces you to form a bond with the games/toys you get, they have meaning. This Christmas I went a bit nuts buying my family gifts and they did the same for me. What happened was despite all the gifts being great, we lost track of what we got and in turn diminished the value of the gifts. It's time to learn a little focus.

Just as the GB crew mentioned in their top 10 lists, 2013 was a weird year. I can't say many movies came out this year that interested me much but I really enjoyed a few of them, that's all I needed really. Not many 2013 album releases blew my socks off but man did I enjoy AMOK. Not many new TV shows grabbed me but thankfully I discovered older shows like Avatar: The Last Airbender, Buffy and Angel which all would easily fit on my favorite shows of all time list. The games of 2013 didn't really interest me that much either, yet I still bought and played 26 new games and purchased god knows how many cheap games from other years. Gaming is my problem.

Now it's time for the hard part: admitting you were wrong. By that I mean I was wrong; my conclusion was wrong. I think I now know the true reason why I don't enjoy playing Zelda. Once again I look at Dark Souls, a game that is far more tedious and troublesome to play. I focused on Dark Souls, it took me 60 hours to finish but I loved every second of it; well no, not every second... that game can be real nasty. The difference being, I treated Zelda as a game I wanted finish so I could move on through my backlog. It's why a kid can finish Ocarina of Time and a 24 old me can't. It's why I can't let go of Zelda, it's trying to teach me a lesson about myself that I have refused to face and blame on other things. Always remember, when you make a decision out of anger or frustration, it will always be the wrong one. But don't worry, as long as you learn from your mistake, it's all good. If I didn't write that last blog I wouldn't have rediscovered my love for Okami!

The important lesson here I feel is to spend less time playing everything and get absorbed into individual games more. Less worrying about clearing my backlog and more about each individual experience. I need to focus. It's why Brad loves the hell out of Dota 2, he focused 100 hours into understanding that game and the pay off is greater than any other game he's got in to. I must stop buying everything just because I can afford it, I may be able to afford the price tag but I sure as hell don't have the mental capacity to enjoy everything at once.