The most expensive console ever, even adjusting for inflation on older systems. Only two "games" were ever made for it.
This system was likely an international money laundering scheme and or investment fraud scheme. It all backfired when the organized crime "mastermind" wrecked his ill begotten Ferrari and blamed it on his imaginary accomplice, Dietrich. Damn you, Dietrich.
Nearly killed Nintendo when they were at the top of their game. At the very least it served as terrible publicity and distrust before its upcoming N64 system debut. An ill thought out gimmick one would expect from the LeapFrog people or some dollar store toy manufacturer trying to break into the video games business.
Hyped to holy hell, and never released. Its entire purpose, the ability to download games straight to a consoles hard drive, was beaten to the punch by- and is the norm for- all consoles since. Eventually, there came a special keyboard for PCs, but long after PCs made a move from key & mouse to 360 controllers; not to mention long after companies like MadCatz, Razr, and Logitech capitalized on the need for custom MMORPG/e-sport keyboards.
The Sega Genesis was released in Japan in 1988, and its main competitor was Nintendo Family Computer Disk System, from 1986. Due to the first Nintendo home video computer, from 1983, just starting to skyrocket as the NES in America in the late eighties, Nintendo never put out the disk system here. Nintendo gave Americans their own, completely unique Super Mario Bros. 2 game, and back ported Metroid and Zelda. When it came time to replace the NES here, Nintendo decided to line up Japan and America's cycles and make a whole new Super Nintendo for both countries at once. Sega, however, decided to keep marketing the '88 Genesis against the '91 Super NES, and the difference in graphical capabilities and especially sound capabilities began to show in arcade fighting game ports (Mortal Kombat) and PC shooter ports (Doom). Sega needed this expensive and complicated 32X adapter to ease public perception that Nintendo's versions of games were superior. The "32" implied it would be twice as good looking as Super Nintendo's 16-bit graphics, but it barely brought Sega games up to par. It couldn't enhance existing Genesis games; you had to buy- or buy again- special 32X editions of games, and very few were made in its life span. Plus, it was released so late in the Genesis' cycle that developers had already moved onto the Sega Saturn. Meanwhile, every 32X (and SegaCD) purchase stole away a potential Saturn customer, or diminished the value in the CD technology of the Saturn, ultimately leading that system to finish far behind the PlayStation and N64.
The bulky follow up to the 2600 never caught on, especially because it couldn't play existing 2600 games. It used horribly cheap and unintuitive, unaesthetic controller. When major titles like E.T. and Pac Man came to the Atari platform, they were still made for the much older and less graphically capable 2600, likely because it was in so many more homes. The 2600's terribly dated graphics caused many of those later games to be returned to stores in disgust, essentially ruining Atari's dominance, the 2600, and any hope for the 5200.
When the "Nintendo Play Station" deal went under, Nintendo decided, as Sony did, to make a whole separate console for CD technology rather than a SNES add-on. And the $700 mastodon Philips CD-i was it. Noted for bringing us a few horrendous low fidelity cartoons based on Zelda and Mario Bros. Oh, and a few shitty Zelda and Mario games that featured the characters, but played nothing like the genres we know them for. At least Sega had "Sonic CD" rather than "Sonic Teaches the Food Pyramid" or "Sonic Hotel Management". Everything the CD-i could do the SegaCD, Jaguar CD, NeoGeo AES CD, 3DO, TurboGrafix CD, Saturn, and PlayStation could do, and in most cases for way less money.
A handheld online console long before anyone this side of the FCC knew what the fuck WiFi was. So it connected to the web via plugging a goddamned dial up modem telephone wire into it. It used a proprietary ISP, and had speeds of 14kbps. If the battery died all of your saved games, contacts, emails, and phone numbers would be erased. All games were made by the first party, in house studio. There was no backlight. It was a touch screen. A horrible, horrible touch screen.
For one, they didn't score Tim Kitzrow as the console's own Kevin Butler. Hard to come down on a system like this without including shit like Leapfrog systems on this list. Those are for a separate industry. It'd be like CNET stacking a review of a Parker Bros. "laptop" toy against the Macbook Air. Except this was made by Apple, and meant to be a real console and competitor to the likes of N64 and PS1. Apple had Bungie in its grasp. Had they made the graphics a little better than PS1 (it was two years newer), put a 56k modem in, got Bungie to make games for it, and charged $399... it could've been the Xbox.
Ah, yes, the "64-bit" architecture console. Shit, PC gaming didn't go 64-bit until like 2007. This must have had the best graphics ever! Well, these "bits" in the 1990's were meaningless as opposed to the 32-bit/64-bit editions of Windows 7 nowadays. Jaguar added up the processing power of all its different purpose-built chips into one dick length measure of a number. It sported decidedly worse graphics than PS1/N64/3DO/Saturn, and because it was so hard to develop for, many games looked worse than on SNES/32X/CD-i and other previous generation consoles. Failure rate was huge because there was no dust cover to protect the cartridge bay. They even made a CD drive accessory, with even fewer games for it. It is nigh impossible to find a working Jaguar CD today.
Honorable mention: Taco. Take the whole fucker apart to switch game cartridges. Hold it the way you would if making fun of a person's intellect by "licking" an invisible ice cream cone against your ear... in order to make phone calls. Bulky and awkwardly designed from the buttons to the GUI.
Use your keyboard!
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