Is Video Games Making us Stupid? [Look at Games 1]

Is video games really making us stupid? Are their subliminal butchery seeping into our already government zapped brains?

Or are they harmless to anyone remotely resembling a normal human being, and helping us forget the world is a bit shit for a while?

Let’s find out in todays:

“I play games and I’m not stupid,” I hear you cry – well don’t. Crying is for babies and pathologically subnormal individuals. You are stupid and you’ll just have to live with it. Why are you stupid? If you’re asking that, then you’re probably the stupidest of them all.

Modern technology allows us to guess what Einstein would've been like if he had played 'Games'.

If cartridges and game packs are to blame for internet forum memes like “That’s million bucks” then it’s too late for the likes of you and me, brought up in a time where the effects of virtualised games were not apparent. However in today’s media savvy world the badness done by these so called ‘entertainment’ devices is too uncomfortable to sit with. Like a Large Hadron Collider.

Let’s look at the facts. Before video games were invented humankind had achieved feats as great as landing on the moon and making Nixon’s eyes excrete. But today, intoxicated from game's social numbing, no human has so much as looked at the moon without wondering if an elephant is bigger. Figures suggest it’s only getting worse, and that as video games become more real, our own reality becomes muddled in stupidity.

It doesn't work in real life.

Todays newspapers are full of headlines such as: Gameboy’s on ‘The Game’, Sonic makes 6 year old boy crush obese man's turtle in jumping frenzy and regrettably Minister sacked for waving Sixaxis at female boobs, a surreal incident where Minister for Outside Activities Mr. David Nown forgot he was at a meeting and started trying to jiggle the breasts of the opposite colleague because he thought she was Rosemary.

It appears our friends at Fox News have been warning us of the sin of video games for years.

You may feel normal. You may even think yourself less aggressive than those you know who don’t play video games. Hey – I feel the same. Is it possible that in our stupidity we’ve just not realised what monsters we really are?

Put us out of our mind-wrongity for christ's sake.

Unfortunately the evidence given to us by the media is so numerous and incomprehensible; the answer appears conveniently to be yes. And there’s nothing we can do about it, other than line up in a nice little queue and ask someone with a bloody powerful sniper rifle to blow our brains to bits and thereby saving us all from our own stupidity.

But wait! Could the abundant media reports be bias, misleading or inaccurate? Did video game players recently help in the fight against AIDs?

Well that’s for you to work out. And if you’re as smart as you look, you may need to put those videoized game units down, and get cleverer.

Thank you, goodbye, and try not to do anything too stupid.

17 Comments
17 Comments
Posted by BrickRoad

Is video games really making us stupid? Are their subliminal butchery seeping into our already government zapped brains?

Or are they harmless to anyone remotely resembling a normal human being, and helping us forget the world is a bit shit for a while?

Let’s find out in todays:

“I play games and I’m not stupid,” I hear you cry – well don’t. Crying is for babies and pathologically subnormal individuals. You are stupid and you’ll just have to live with it. Why are you stupid? If you’re asking that, then you’re probably the stupidest of them all.

Modern technology allows us to guess what Einstein would've been like if he had played 'Games'.

If cartridges and game packs are to blame for internet forum memes like “That’s million bucks” then it’s too late for the likes of you and me, brought up in a time where the effects of virtualised games were not apparent. However in today’s media savvy world the badness done by these so called ‘entertainment’ devices is too uncomfortable to sit with. Like a Large Hadron Collider.

Let’s look at the facts. Before video games were invented humankind had achieved feats as great as landing on the moon and making Nixon’s eyes excrete. But today, intoxicated from game's social numbing, no human has so much as looked at the moon without wondering if an elephant is bigger. Figures suggest it’s only getting worse, and that as video games become more real, our own reality becomes muddled in stupidity.

It doesn't work in real life.

Todays newspapers are full of headlines such as: Gameboy’s on ‘The Game’, Sonic makes 6 year old boy crush obese man's turtle in jumping frenzy and regrettably Minister sacked for waving Sixaxis at female boobs, a surreal incident where Minister for Outside Activities Mr. David Nown forgot he was at a meeting and started trying to jiggle the breasts of the opposite colleague because he thought she was Rosemary.

It appears our friends at Fox News have been warning us of the sin of video games for years.

You may feel normal. You may even think yourself less aggressive than those you know who don’t play video games. Hey – I feel the same. Is it possible that in our stupidity we’ve just not realised what monsters we really are?

Put us out of our mind-wrongity for christ's sake.

Unfortunately the evidence given to us by the media is so numerous and incomprehensible; the answer appears conveniently to be yes. And there’s nothing we can do about it, other than line up in a nice little queue and ask someone with a bloody powerful sniper rifle to blow our brains to bits and thereby saving us all from our own stupidity.

But wait! Could the abundant media reports be bias, misleading or inaccurate? Did video game players recently help in the fight against AIDs?

Well that’s for you to work out. And if you’re as smart as you look, you may need to put those videoized game units down, and get cleverer.

Thank you, goodbye, and try not to do anything too stupid.

Posted by Vinny_Says

"Is video games making us stupid?"

...not sure if trolling or just actually stupid

Posted by chrismafuchris

Boy, was that fun to read. Informative too. Keep up the good work!

Posted by BrainSpecialist

When I started reading this article, I thought you were going to write something intelligent.

Imagine my surprise.

Posted by BrickRoad

@BrainSpecialist: I'm afraid you've rather missed the point. Never mind, you'll get there.

Posted by RollingZeppelin

@BrickRoad said:

Is video games really making us stupid?

Well, I guess so...

Posted by BrickRoad

@RollingZeppelin: Don't worry. It's a joke. Get it? Like how the very next line has the opposite error. Because I was writing about... ah never mind.

Posted by BrainSpecialist

@BrickRoad: We get the joke but your blog post is muddled, badly written, and unfortunately very dull to read.

Posted by RollingZeppelin

@BrickRoad: Ah, I see. Dry humour is tough to detect on forums sometimes. Especially when it's the first part of the post.

Posted by chrismafuchris

Don't listen to the haters. You're a great writer.

Posted by BrickRoad

@BrainSpecialist: It's a parody of bad blogging isn't it? The terrible graphics, the title that's got an error in it, etc. I rather think you didn't get the joke at all, actually. Oh well. We both tried didn't we? Me to write something satirical and you to be destructive. We're both very cool.

Edited by havelava

Satire? Yes

Good Satire? No

But Hey!

@Barbed_Haywire, and @chrismafuchris

seem to like it, so who am I to judge?

Still, I'm of the same mind as @BrainSpecialist, it just wasn't very well written.

Posted by Barbed_Haywire

Absolutely brilliant, I actually laughed out loud at the title and then proceeded to giggle like a schoolgirl throughout most of the article. Bravo.

Posted by BrainSpecialist

@BrickRoad: Okay.

Posted by CaptainTightPants
@BrickRoad: Keep trying man, it is a good start.
But for now I have to agree with this guy 
 
@havelava said:

Satire? Yes

Good Satire? No

Posted by Manhattan_Project

I have no opinion on this blog post.

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Posted by Gamer_152

Afraid I'm with the other guys on this one. I could tell it was a joke post and I think it's got some potential but I didn't really think it was funny.

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