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BrokenCage

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Games That Don't Live Up To The Hype.

Every game released is accompanied with a chrorus of hype. Each game is always the most "innovative" experience in existence. Game reviewers can often contribute to this madness by hyping the "visual style" and "fresh gameplay." This is all well and good, until you get the game home and realize that it just isn't any fun...

These are the games I feel that way about. You may not agree, and I'm not asking you to. Also, I've played through every game on this list, start to finish.    

List items

  • The problem with Alan Wake is that it never has a chance to be suspenseful. It keeps throwing enemies at you left and right, never giving you a chance to be nervous about what's in the woods. You already know. There are shadowy figures in the woods, and if you see a light shining in the distance, you're about to be attacked by six of them. If there had been fewer attacks, and fewer enemies, the game would've built more suspense, and been more interesting to play.

  • There are a lot of good things about this game, but it's glaring flaws are completely unacceptable. Money is a joke. It serves absolutely no purpose outside of buying more buildings to make more money. The controls aren't reliable. Sometimes you will assassinate someone that isn't even on the screen instead of your intended target. Sometimes you will pick up a dead body instead of grabbing your target. It's horribly inconsistent. Then there's the frustration of the timesinks. Several times you'll just be following someone over here, then over there, then you'll escape. Recycle. Finally, on the very last stage, you'll be asked to literally platform in a circle, with little circles in that circle, and if you swing on the wrong bar, the platforms disappear and you get to do it all again. Fun. They should've known when to end the game, and added more inventive missions than fetch and follow quests.

    Oh, and during the bomber mission, ask yourself this: If the only way to get to the top of the tower is via Parkour from ledge to ledge INSIDE the tower, how the hell did they get the parts to build the bomber up to the top of the tower?? They sacrifice ALL logic just to subject the player to redundant puzzles every five seconds. (Also, you can't reach the Broken Acqueduct Viewpoint until after Sequence 7, even though it shows up on the map around Sequence 3.)

  • For a game that is basically Devil May Cry with boobs, it drags on WAY TOO LONG. Building upon that, every boss in the game is recycled later. This takes any feeling of epicness out of a boss fight when you have to repeat the encounter 2-3 times. Also, towards the end of the game, it begins relying on cheap instant-kills to create difficulty, which is always a sign of lazy game design.

  • I was crazy about Fable, and when reviewers started calling this "game of the year," I had to own it. Imagine my disappointment when I realized the epic story from Fable was replaced with a half-hearted "revenge tale" that lacked motivation and emotion. To make matters worse, the redundant gameplay is worsened by silly puzzle designs like "Chase the ball through the cave, hit it, now shoot it, now cast on it, ok, the door is open." Fable felt epic and passionate to me, Fable II felt like a paycheck.

  • Since GTA:SA is my favorite of the franchise, I was gnawing at the bit for GTAIV. When the big "IGN's first 10" hype hit, I had to have it. In fact, it was the first game I purchased for my 360. As soon as I got into a car, I knew something was wrong. Just because you're going for a more realistic story doesn't mean you have to sacrifice driving. Niko doesn't die from a single gunshot to the gut and stay dead for the rest of the game does he? So why did the driving mechanics have to be tweaked until driving just wasn't fun anymore? LEAVE IT ALONE! (I now prefer SR2 to GTAIV.)

  • The entire time I owned my PS2, all I ever heard from the Xbox side was Halo. That's all you needed, Halo. It seemed like nothing could compare. So when I got my Xbox 360, I went out and I bought Halo. It's difficult to judge it as it stood when it was first released by playing it after experiencing some of this generations greatest. I fully acknowledge that Halo came up with some designs that changed the way we play FPS games. That, however, doesn't change the fact that it's a four hour game stretched into ten. It's got more padding than a stuntmen banging an umpire. The entire final mission is a six minute driving segment with absolutely no checkpoints in the Warthog. The Warthog, if you've never driven one, has the same mechanics as the Mako in Mass Effect or the driving missions in Gears of War. It handles like garbage. This is on top of the fact that I'm traveling back through the same areas I've already played, with the same always-grey textures, and the same spawn-on-top-of-you, zergling mobs. The game starts out living up to the hype, peaks, and crashes to the floor before it's all said and done. Halo is a good example of not knowing when to end it.

  • Most of the praise I've heard regarding this game is that there is just "so much to do." Yeah, that's great, but is it fun? No. Red Dead Redemption can be summed up in one activity, Horse Riding. You ride a horse to the mission, then you have to ride with a posse to the designated combat zone, then you ride back to town just to do it all again. There is actually a mission in this game that is nothing more than riding to a cutscene and then riding back. That's the entire mission. There's a fast travel mechanic, but it involves animations of sitting at a campfire, and kicking dirt on a campfire, a good twenty seconds of animation just to fast travel (which you can't do during a mission.) This is a game designed for people who play just to waste time, not to have an experience.

  • This is a tough one, cause I love this game, and I've beaten it many times. However, that doesn't change the fact that many of the gameplay decisions are just bad. The biggest flaw is the sparring partner in career mode. He is often so overly powerful that your actual opponent seems like a pathetic schoolgirl in comparison. Scheduled fights feel like a joke after a few months of sparring. It really makes career mode feel more like a grind than a career.
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