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crusnchill's forum posts
Something I found that works with this sort of friend.
" I have one friend who constantly bails on plans. It's usually more surprising when he actually shows up somewhere he has said he will be."
When I'm about to ask a friend if they'd like to come round or hang out somewhere, if they don't look interested in what I'm talking about or they look like they point blank aren't listening, then before the question comes out of my mouth I simply say to them, "Do you really care about what we're talking about? Because you don't look interested."
If they aren't interested then you've just saved yourself a tonne of time, if they are interested then they'll listen up more and respect you more too for calling them out on their shit.
Something else that I find helps guarantee that your friend will show up is putting a price of admission on your personal time.
If I'm organising to do something, I will make sure that my time at least appears like it requires some level of effort on their part if they want to hang out with me.
I don't do this to seem cool, but to make sure my friends always respect my time.
For example, I'll say; "Hey! Will you really be there, yes or no? I want you to respect my time. If you flake out on me then I'll take that as you looking down at me. I don't want to hang out with people that look down at me. So, yes or no?"
Don't be aggressive but say it like you mean it.
I mean come on, the guy doesn't care as much as you deserve if he can't even be bothered to be there to hang out with you.
Oh and I say to them; "If you still show up but you're really late then you'll have to buy me 2 rounds of beer." (And to make it seem nicer. Tell him that if you're ever late for him you'll buy him 2 rounds of beer.)
I feel like maybe I'm giving too much social advice out all in one go.
Apologies, I'm a life coach so I sometimes find myself going into way too much detail in relation to the thing that interests me the most... Socialising.
I used to hate it when one friend in particular would ONLY call on Friday nights because it was convenient for him, and I was a guaranteed friend that would come and hang out with him.
I only had nothing to do on Friday nights because I finished work REALLY late.
Following this I found a different job and started going out a lot more with other friends.
He actually got pissed off that he couldn't hang out any more. I was flabbergasted, I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
I told him point blank that; "I'm not your: 'just in case I'm bored' friend, that you ask to hang out when ever you don't have any plans.
start respecting my time, or just leave me alone."
Shortly after he bought me like 4 cold ones and we just laughed it away.
We're best friends now.
I think that maybe if we vocalise our annoyances with our friends, in a way that is understandable and not needy, then friends will respect you more.
Lucky I'm no longer going on holiday huh?
Now I get to play Dragon Age instead.
Sarcasm aside, my holiday/vacation was cancelled for reasons that don't matter on this forum. I figure the least I can do in exchange for not having a holiday is buy something I would like to play.
Hopefully it's cool DLC and not like that "Return to Ostagar" DLC.
For me personally, I feel like EA has been consistently showing their newer more diverse directions and I think that this can only be a good thing for the industry.
So if I had to choose one, I'd have to go with diversity. EA!
I really hope that EA doesn't return to its, hopefully, long dead old ways again though.
I'm beginning to get the impression that beyond good & evil 2 is one of those games that has an announcement trailer and nothing's actually been created in the background.