Shepherd. Wait... did that wrong. Dialogue? Yeah, spell check. Dialogue.
After weeks and months of stalling and procrastination, I finally got the courage to play Mass Effect. Perhaps you've never heard of it. Mass Effect is a small video game made by Bioware, a tiny, independent group of ragtag nerds with a love for speaking and the occasional action. It's about aliens and spaceships and going pew pew pew with your fancy space gun. But it's not your ordinary space shooter, it's a game with a grossly expansive universe with lots of attention to the tiniest details. For example, did you know the Salarians live relatively short lives due to their metabolism? Did you also know the average Krogan can bench press 600 pounds? And that the SSV Normandy was not named for the World War II battle, but after Normandy Mining, a former mining company based in Australia? Well when you talk to people like I do in Mass Effect, you can find all sorts of useless information on various alien species, class hierarchy, eating habits, hygiene, favorite color, and more. I've played through several hours of the game and I feel I've barely scratched the surface not just because I take my fucking time sightseeing like I always do in games of this scope, but because I have to talk to everything that moves. It's an unfortunate side affect of my completionist syndrome. Of course the game doesn't help since conversations can last a really long time. I'm expected at one point in the game to run into one of the maintenance workers at the Citadel and ask him in detail about his race, job, favorite football team, and last sexual encounter because I would not be surprised.
Mass Effect: the book? But I do exaggerate just a smidge... or I'm playing it wrong. Mass Effect is a very talkative game with the inability to shut up when I'm in control. I guess if you're trying to build a universe from scratch, one way is to have it in your face all the time, and people totally dig that. From my point of view, as long as the dialogue is good and in no way hokey, go ahead and talk my ear off because getting to know the various groups, races, and their history will undoubtedly help understanding the entire story when it's time to blow up the Death Star or whatever happens at the end. There's an entire universe to explore filled with some odd creatures that all speak English. Star Trek, much?
Where's the "Get back in the kitchen, woman!" option? What I'm trying to say is that while the choices aren't detrimental to the game, maybe games should consider cutting some unnecessary branches on some of those dialogue trees or even streamlining some of the options. Too often I go to a crew member or complete stranger and we chat for a second... and then Shepard gets all inquisitive. And so 6 different questions show up. Sometimes I wish there was an "all of the above" choice where the morality portion is not involved just to save my mouse a few clicks. The alternative would be to avoid everyone at all costs and just stick to the essentials, but I fear there's something I'll be missing if I say nothing at all so will continue to speak to the most trivial members of society gaining as much knowledge as I can.
So that's my Mass Effect experience in a nutshell so far, but you might be wondering if I have some vendetta against dialogue trees. Well, not really. The whole point of a dialogue tree is not just to inform or decide between a good and bad outcome, but also to increase the replay value of a game. In the case of Mass Effect, Bioware's goal was for the player (that's me... and probably you) to try out every possible scenario and choose Shepard's past, present, and future. It's like reading a "Choose Your Own Adventure" book over and over reading every possible outcome. Right now I'm attempting to create a good Shepard because that's how I always roll, but a part of me wants to create asshole Shepard for the hell of it.
Maybe? Now with that out of the way, I was trying to find out what the last game I played at length that had dialogue in tree form. The Sam & Max games come to mind, but that's typical of that genre. Before that, I believe it was Persona 4... and I remember their dialogue trees making a huge difference in how Charlie Tunoku's year would turn out with all the intimacy, popularity, and Social Links. Unfortunately that also means 98% of normal gamers will never get a unique experience due to the 60-100 hours of actual game... that's a lot of JRPG to swallow. That means parts of the game will forever be unknown to me because I doubt I'll touch Persona 4 again.
I think I'm finally out of things to say so I guess this is the part of the blog where I ask a question about what you think about dialogue trees.
What's your opinion on dialogue trees?
Is there a game out there with the perfect dialogue tree construct?
Do you love having dialogue trees as a means to make decisions?
Are you indifferent towards them?
Do you hate them with a passion because you think it's a poor way to tell a story or because you think predetermining your own fate is stupid?
Well this is a marketing tactic I haven't seen in a while. I can remember the days where I'd browse through my latest Nintendo Power and see some advertisement boasting a game's cutting-edge graphics or its extreme attitude. One of the more interesting marketing tactics was to portray said game as too extreme or too gross for parents. And now, Dead Space 2 brings back that ad trick.
Your mom hates Dead Space 2? Maybe this worked back when the majority of gamers were teens and young adults, but what is the Dead Space 2 demographic? People who are old enough to buy video games on their own. This ad is clearly aimed at people who aren't old enough to walk into a Gamestop on their own and buy Dead Space 2. Unless you're 15 or younger, that tagline is downright stupid. And I think the young teens on this site might find it just as dumb. And does that mean your mom might like the upcoming Gears of War 3? Bulletstorm? Actually in the case of Bulletstorm, that might be dumb enough to work.
I just don't see this advertising gimmick working in an industry where violence and scary shit is fairly commonplace. Now if this marketing ploy makes it to the cable news networks, maybe I will eat a little crow since everybody knows news coverage is free advertising, but EA fucked up this time, in my opinion.
Yet the worst advertising I've seen this week goes to Mario Sports Mix and its creepy Mii mascots. YOUTUBE CLIP GO!
I guess it's great to see Nintendo actually recognizing that Miis still exist, but they couldn't have picked a creepier way to use giant life-size Miis. The whole SportsCenter vibe is pretty corny as it should be. It is just a Mario sports game after all. Yet they had to use Miis here? I think they could've went with a fake Stuart Scott/Scott Van Pelt combo yet they go with a stoned Mii with a pedophile mustache. And at the 0:08 mark, I think the lady Mii is flipping the bird.
So Dead Space 2 ad... seriously? Is this the best they can do?
And Mario Sports Mix ad... really? Big Mii head mode? Thoughts?
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And I wonder if Comcast can make a trade. I'll give up G4 for something else. Like IFC or Boomerang... anything. I don't care. I don't need another channel that shows COPS in syndication.
Maybe I'm ranting to the wrong crowd. Perhaps a stern letter to Comcast would be more effective.
Also, I started playing video games again. Mass Effect... so far so good.
Well don't expect to get an expert opinion on the subject of handheld games.
I'm probably in the small minority of people here who has never owned a handheld. Ever. Hell, I don't even like the idea of playing on a mobile phone. So that's why I rarely ever talk about anything related to the DS or PSP because I just don't play those games. So as a biased observer, I can honestly say that the 3DS looks pretty cool. Wait, what?
Yeah... I think the lineup looks pretty awesome, but a piece of advice for Nintendo. Please stop with the Nintendo 64 remakes. They're completely unnecessary.
Hey guys it's snowing outside and everything is all white and I'm not doing anything tomorrow so you can all come over and play some NBA Jam or Wii Party I'll make hot chocolate and s'mores and play Snow's Informer on a loop because we're awesome and don't give a shit!
It was a slow week for me when it comes to the world of video games. In fact, I've pretty much been staying away from long and even video game sessions of moderate length all year. It's one of these lulls I find myself in every few months. Perhaps this withdrawal process could be beneficial, but somehow I found myself one day playing Plants vs. Zombies with my brother and having a fucking blast!
Tower defense, right? It's like somewhere between match 3 puzzle games and virtual hamster simulators on the casual meter, but... wait a minute. I like matching 3 of something. But this tower defense is good. Really good. And surprisingly deep and requires strategy and critical thinking at times. Maybe I'm exaggerating a little, but I'm not lying about its quality. We had a fucking blast with this game and I'm gonna recommend it to you, the viewing audience.
I guess there's a reason PopCap is a giant in the casual gaming industry. They make some interesting shit.
But the real question is the title of the blog. Is that all we need to protect us from the undead? Because I don't think all the peashooters in the world can take out one of them fast 28 Days Later/Left 4 Dead zombies.
I almost forgot I have more Christmas cheer to spread... nearly 3 weeks after Christmas. So I have 3 copies left to give since I got a bit chat drunk and gave some away to some epic people. Don't know what I was thinking.
So... you can win if you correctly guess what the review scores for the following games will be.
Bulletstorm
Dead Space 2
LittleBigPlanet 2
Gotta have a Steam account (preferably active) to claim your prize. In case of a tie, the first 3 who guess correct will win.
And DO NOT EDIT YOUR POST! I don't allow cheatin', son.
In other news, I really should start playing video games.
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I've said this a number of times before... I think, but Bulletstorm is one of my most wanted games of the year and 2011 has barely started. Why do I have this mancrush on such a ridiculous game? Let me count the ways.
I won't make this list too long so consider yourself lucky... and consider myself lazy.
Bulletstorm might be over-the-top than Duke Nukem. 2011 is shaping up to be the year of stupid fun and Bulletstorm, not Duke Nukem Forever, is going to lead the way. Nothing against Duke since we normally would bet on him, but the dialogue in Bulletstorm is going to be more childish and more retarded.
Stupid fun works. Too many serious games are serious. Bulletstorm is not a serious game and I fully endorse that style.
Dicktits.
You can kick dudes. Not enough games allow you to actually kick dudes.
Variety is the spice of life. You guys remember MadWorld? The idea was to mix up your attacks and perform crazy combos in order to create the most brutal deaths. It sorta worked, but Bulletstorm should improve on that concept.
If you've played Super Mario Bros. at all during your life, chances are you've wanted to see what would happen if Mario cleared the flagpole just to see what was beyond it. Well... I'm sure it's been done before and YouTubed and all that junk, but here it is. World 1-1, flagpole jumper.
Oh yeah, bad language and stuff.
Now that I think about it, this is a stupid idea. Isn't the goal to ride that pole like a stripper? Mario, you dirty skank.
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