By Dalai 5 Comments
About 5 days and 28 hours of play time with the latest Zelda adventure, I can honestly say that I'm familiar with the inner workings of Skyloft and the surface world in general. I know my way around town pretty well, I have a friendly relationship with the Item Check girl, and I am a master bug catcher. There is so much I know about the world in Skyward Sword, but there are burning questions that need answered. It's possible they'll be answered as I play through the second half of the game, but I can't wait for the final battle with Ghirahim or maybe the fortune teller (he knows too much) to have these questions answered for me. So let me ask you all here since you've all been playing Skyward Sword on your dustless Wii consoles.
- In the world of Skyloft, there is an honest-to-goodness working toilet. It's fairly crude by modern standards, but indoor plumbing in my Zelda game? I'm stunned! Anyway, there is only one of these toilets in the entire floating town. That toilet takes care of the people who live at the Knight Academy, but what about the common folk? They don't have toilets. Do they... just poop off the edge of the island? Or do they all just use that one crapper? Because I never see a line into the bathroom. Ever.
- No Zelda game can ever survive without pots of all shapes, sizes, and creeds. They are virtually everywhere in the universe, both above the clouds and below. Yet not a single potter in Skyloft. Where the hell do they come from? Does it rain pots while the town sleeps? Seriously, somebody has to explain these mysterious pots for me.
- Speaking of pots and breakables, how come only a handful of people get pissed off when I break their shit? Some people don't give a fuck if I break their fine china. Why? Do they think Link is "special" or something?
- On the subject of breaking shit, why is Link such an asshole? Why does he always barge into people's homes and tear shit up for no reason?
- And finally, who has ever tried pumpkin soup? Because this delicacy has eluded me my entire life. It's a pretty big deal in some circles in Skyloft, but the real world doesn't care about pumpkin soup.
I should have more serious thoughts on Zelda: Skyward Sword in a few days... unless I run into the only potter in town. Because he's gonna kill me after what I've done to his work.