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Dalai

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Whiskey Media subscriptions and how I would structure them.

The fine people at Whiskey Media is kicking around a subscription service for its websites, as you all know. And yeah, I guess I trust the Whiskey guys in making the subscription service as optional as possible since it could end up splitting the community between the haves and have-nots... but personally, I'd scrap the whole thing. 
 
Unless... you use my ideas. 
 
I'd use a multi-tiered structure of sweet perks and special features in order to squeeze as much money out of you as possible. 
 

  • Vanilla Giant Bomb (free) - stays as is, from the Bombcast to the Endurance Runs.
  • Taaka Gin package ($10/year) - specialized birthday message from the Giant Bomb staff, free bottle of Taaka gin sent to you.
  • The C-word package ($20/year) - a random staffer will call you a cunt during Kessler Kam, one can of surstromming sent to you.
  • Batmanbatmanbatman package ($50/year) - one new, unique Batman figurine sent to your door each year, chance to win a copy of Deadly Premonition signed by Swery65.
  • Honest Abe package ($100/year) - free copy of Lincoln Force: Limited Edition complete with stovepipe hat and a jar with a human brain inside, ability to permaban other members.
  • Lucha package ($500 one-time fee) - Jeff and Brad will come to your house riding Luchadeer with a copy of the Genesis version of UMK3. They'll play UMK3 with you provided you have a Sega Genesis. Brad will be required to die first while playing. Ads on the site will be removed.
  • Whiskey movie package ($2000 one-time fee) - Whiskey Media will fly you to San Francisco where the Screened staff will take you to the latest movies. Also comes with a straitjacket signed by Alex Navarro.
  • The works ($10000 one-time fee) - fly to Sausalito to visit the old offices, tour the new office, play Persona 4 with the Giant Bomb staff, be a guest on every Whiskey Media podcast, a night of karaoke with Brad Shoemaker, and enter to win a NBA Jam arcade machine signed and played by Jeff Gerstmann. Custom forum signatures.
 
I will demand royalties if you go with these suggestions, by the way.
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Dalai

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Edited By Dalai

The fine people at Whiskey Media is kicking around a subscription service for its websites, as you all know. And yeah, I guess I trust the Whiskey guys in making the subscription service as optional as possible since it could end up splitting the community between the haves and have-nots... but personally, I'd scrap the whole thing. 
 
Unless... you use my ideas. 
 
I'd use a multi-tiered structure of sweet perks and special features in order to squeeze as much money out of you as possible. 
 

  • Vanilla Giant Bomb (free) - stays as is, from the Bombcast to the Endurance Runs.
  • Taaka Gin package ($10/year) - specialized birthday message from the Giant Bomb staff, free bottle of Taaka gin sent to you.
  • The C-word package ($20/year) - a random staffer will call you a cunt during Kessler Kam, one can of surstromming sent to you.
  • Batmanbatmanbatman package ($50/year) - one new, unique Batman figurine sent to your door each year, chance to win a copy of Deadly Premonition signed by Swery65.
  • Honest Abe package ($100/year) - free copy of Lincoln Force: Limited Edition complete with stovepipe hat and a jar with a human brain inside, ability to permaban other members.
  • Lucha package ($500 one-time fee) - Jeff and Brad will come to your house riding Luchadeer with a copy of the Genesis version of UMK3. They'll play UMK3 with you provided you have a Sega Genesis. Brad will be required to die first while playing. Ads on the site will be removed.
  • Whiskey movie package ($2000 one-time fee) - Whiskey Media will fly you to San Francisco where the Screened staff will take you to the latest movies. Also comes with a straitjacket signed by Alex Navarro.
  • The works ($10000 one-time fee) - fly to Sausalito to visit the old offices, tour the new office, play Persona 4 with the Giant Bomb staff, be a guest on every Whiskey Media podcast, a night of karaoke with Brad Shoemaker, and enter to win a NBA Jam arcade machine signed and played by Jeff Gerstmann. Custom forum signatures.
 
I will demand royalties if you go with these suggestions, by the way.
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bed

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Edited By bed

this has to be the best subscription list that i have ever seen.  
 
is there a lifetime package? 

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Claude

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Edited By Claude

The Lucha Package seems rather cheap. I would pay at least twice that amount.

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ajamafalous

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Edited By ajamafalous

I'd pay for the Taaka Gin package.

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Video_Game_King

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Edited By Video_Game_King

Do the benefits stack, or am I fucked if I pay for The Works only?

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ht101

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Edited By ht101
@Video_Game_King: I hope they would stack.  I would have to go for the Lucha package.  Since I don't have a Genesis, would we be able to choose the game they bring based on the systems we own?