The VGAs are not good.

I like Video Games. I like Comic Books, I like Anime, I like Manga, I like Films, I like Music and I even like books. But to me games are no 1, pure and simple. Video games are able to bring out a type of passion in me that no other art form can. The thing is being that passionate about games means you end up shitting on games that don't really deserve it, for example, I did not like the majority of Portal 2. I think that the second part of that let us see behind the curtain way too much and removed the secretive nature of the first game. Also I don't find those games funny.

But even though I have those problems with the game I still think it is a fucking amazing game. The fact that my main problem with the game isn’t a basic level criticism of “the shooting suck balls” means that is should be given praise. That is where my problem with the VGAs come from. When I was done with the show I didn’t feel like my favourite art form was being applauded in any way, I felt like it had been made fun of.

The sad thing is they got it right for about five minutes. There was a great montage of the Zelda games, Shigeru Miyamoto came on stage to a standing ovation. Even now thirty minutes into this terrible excuse of a show, that seems only to exist for Gametrailers to get "exclusive" trailers, there was some kind of hope that the final awards of the night would have some kind of decency in them.

Then Charlie Sheen watched Robert Bowling from Infinity Ward be be chased off stage by a man dressed in cameo. The same man then proceeded to "Teabag" another developer. THIS HAPPENED TWICE! IN ONE SHOW! Adam Sandler would look at that and say, "Hey shouldn't we not repeat the same joke twice in one show?" But no this is what the gamers want. I can just feel the good vibes.


E3 1: The One that cost $1000 to make

 More than 1 colour, the budget has been blown.

Microsoft happened and it turns out that the internet is pissed because they tried to get the whole Kinect into the public spotlight. But how would you do that? Oh yeah you show it to the fucking press. And what is E3? A FUCKING PRESS EVENT! The BBC go to E3 for fucks sake, and next week there will be a report that gets looped into BBC news 24 that is about E3 and unless Nintendo and Sony cure cancer in front of our eyes you know who will have top billing. Microsoft with Kinect I don't that there are that same impartiality laws surrounding E3 as there is for an Election. But on to the breakdown of the games.

Call of Duty: Black Ops

Hey they made a Call of Duty game; it has a level where you sneak around. Then it skips ahead for your convenience after that there is a bit where you have to escape because you did something probably involved blowing shit up. Finally you have to escape in a vehicle.... wait I feel like I've seen this demo before only with less forest and more snow. But seriously that looks like Call of Duty and it is cool that Treyarch has a new logo.

Metal Gear Solid: Rising 

For me this was the biggest disappointment of the show. Raiden in what he stands for is Kojima’s giant middle finger to the fans of the Metal Gear games, from being the protagonist in MGS 2 to becoming the most badass character in MGS 4. I found it really funny when after MGS 4 came out that people wanted a Raiden spin off. But the trailer, god that was bad, it started with the normal Metal Gear action trailer fare, but then after the title they decide to show the same goddamn cutting concept over and over. It was like a tech demo for your middleware called Slice. I really hope the real combat sections are good because if not I might as well YouTube the cutscenes.

Gears of War 3

Yep that is Gears of War; the suits that Marcus and co wears look awful nut hey there are two ladies.  

Fable III

Yep that is Fable. Don't see why you bring Peter Molyneux out just for a trailer. I get this feeling that he was going to show something that got pulled out at the last second.

Codename: Kingdoms

Wow Crytek can do things other than first person shooters.

Halo: Reach

Yep that is Halo. Oh and space combat, I wonder if we will see Battlefront 2 style space battles?

 This is why Kudo wears sunglasses.


I guess we know where the Milo technology went, but that demo was creepy as hell. I get what they are doing and hey if Nintendogs got me to buy a DS and Eyepet got me to buy a Playstation Eye then I am prepared to be freaked out by a Tiger that wants to eat my face secretly.

Kinect Sports &  Kinect Adventures

I dug this way more than I should. I guess I just find it fun watching people I don’t know playing motion games. Oh and it is a Rare game so I have to buy it. I could see this working, in fact if Microsoft launched a Kinect bundle that had both Sports and Adventure both together for say £120 they could make a killing.

Kinect Joy Ride

I guess that Microsoft decided that this could use some motion control. I don’t know I'm not all into Kart racers as it is.

Your Shape: Fitness Evolved

  • First: great subtitle
  • Second: we get it we aren’t in shape
  • But hey you do win an award for showing me the only person in the world I now hate more than Don Mattrick.

Dance Central

Harmonix I can’t hate even after you put out a Green Day game, but still the game better contain a white guy dancing mode. Most funny gif potential lies here. 

Star Wars Game

Does anyone over the age of 9 care about Star Wars anymore and even worse it looks to be based on the clone wars CG crap. Oh I don’t have to point out the whole on Naboo fighting both Stormtroopers and Droids, or the fact that the Jedi looks like Anakin Skywalker but is fighting Darth Vader.

This thing has gotten too big so I'll just go over the big stuff. 

Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit

Totally the third Hot pursuit game but also the only one to not have a number in the title. We know Criterion can make a solid racing game so I just wonder how the game will play. 


This game looks nuts.  

Rayman: Origins

Finally a new Rayman game and even better it is in 2D 

Child of Eden

 wow, just wow that trailer was just so purdy and the game is rez for traffic cops. seriously looks cool. I wonder if it will have that Joy Williams song in it.

E3 0: The Kinda Crappy Prequel

The age of crappy paint banners begins. 

With E3 about to blow through the wall of timeyiness. It would now be a good idea for me to look at what we think we know will be at E3 proper. 


 I pray to Steve Ballmer that Don is a no-show
.Microsoft’s first bigish leak was Kinect (Aka the Technology formally known as Natal). You know Kinetic energy, Motion... you see it’s a motion controller and the name is scientific for motion. Also Kinect sounds like connect, see we too can be smart.

Ugh I have to say that is one of the most stupid name changes I have ever heard, and I remember the Revolution to Wii name change, I just don’t understand why you would name something a name that when typed into Google will get you a spelling change. But I’m still looking forward to the tech powering the portmanteau because the one thing my TV really need is yet another camera pointing at me while I look desperately into a screen.

Then there is the Rumoured Xbox 360 Slim, a piece of hardware that looks like someone took a shitty pc case that cost £20 an decided that it needed a good kicking in. I also love the fact that the console that has numerous problems with heat related problems is being made smaller. But hey that don’t matter no because the inhale in this one is FUCKING EXSTREME!!! 

But what about the games no one asks. Well crackdown 2 is out soon so I expect at least a mention, and then there is Dead Rising 2 and its Half-bred Arcade son. I wholly expect that the Arcade game will be part of the “Summer of Fun 2010” Or “Hotties Bebop” whatever they call the summer thing; you know when the good Live Arcade games come out. We might get a peak of Gears of War 3 but then that might rub Halo Reach up a bit wrong. I’m sure that Microsoft knows that backing Call of Duty: Black Ops would be toxic because they kind of get the idea that the people who watch this don’t like the whore that is Treyarch that much.

I am really look forward to MGS Rising mainly because I like all that Raiden stands for, he is Kojima's giant middle finger to the fans that like security during their video games, so making him the best thing in MGS 4 was the best thing he could of done.


Okay Sony for you I have no expectations, all you need to do to get me buy Move is say the words "The Last Guardian is Move compatible" seriously that is it, hell if you give a release date as well you've won. Oh and kill Rico in the Killzone 3 trailer. 


Nintendo you have 2ish hours to show me if I will care about the Wii for the next 12 months. If the leaked Zelda stuff is correct then you already have lost me.

“The game tells a story several hundred years before Ocarina of Time. It also answers the question of how the Mastersword came into being.”

By invoking the name of Ocarina of Time they are intentionally trying to sucker fans of the series into buying the game, the last time they did that it was called Twilight Princess and that was so effing great.

“Sometimes you have to "draw" a specific symbol on a door with your sword, to open it.  The Bow-Control is very similar to the Bow-Control in Wii Sports Resort, as the script shows.”

Great gimmicks that is what will revitalise the Zelda series on consoles, this just sound like a last ditch attempt at making the Zelda series hit big on the Wii, i expect to never Link or Zelda on the main console unless it is in a crossover game. 

3DS might me fun but I wonder how they will try to convince us that this thing ain't just smoke and mirrors.

I should blog more often

Quite simply I don't blog enough. 
you see i twitter quite a lot about video games for example (If you don't understand twitter time goes up the page)

  1. The Deadly Premonition soundtrack is making sad about the fact I can't whistle
  2. Also Gamefreak, stop usind the same sound effects from red and green in your games.
  3. Gamefreak, make a Pokemon MMO already.
  4. Namco Bandi/ Bandi Namco, you should erm... I can't remember the last time I played one of your games.
  5. Capcom you really should make another Darkstalkers game. Or you could just redraw Morrigan in the not so secret Marvel vs capcom 3.
  6. Kojima you just make your godamn movie already
  7. Team Sonic, you just give up.
  8. Same goes to you Square, fuck the fans all they want is FF VII.
  9. Nintendo, ignore your fans. Don't go for realistic graphics in your next Zelda game! Learn that fans are idiots that only want OoT.    
see all relevant.  
erm yes so this new quest thing is cool. made me remake my profile background. 

Final Fantasy and me

Just recently I got Final Fantasy XIII, and playing it has made me think about the past games in the series and how they relate to my view on gaming today.
being born in the early 90's my first view of the Final Fantasy games was like most other people FFVII, which I hated i can never really explain why but i guess it has something to do with my friend loving it and building it up to the pinnacle of gaming history only for it be fine. In retrospect i think my views on FFVII are filtered through a pair of the black tinted glasses of hatred. 
After taking a break from the series I finally gave it another try with FFX, which to date is my favorite Japanese RPG of all time. Now i know there are some things in the game that are really retarded, Tidus, Wakka, Tidus, Blitzball and Tidus come to mind, and the voice acting is god awful at times, and the whole game suffers from the need to over-explain everything, and Rikku is only 15 yet is the most sexualised thing in the game (if you ignore Lulu's boobs). But on a whole i really like the flow of the game, the fact that it is not until around the last 30 percent of the game until it opens up location wise, and it is a great idea, you know almost everywhere in the game before it throws you to the wolves.
Then comes FFXII, in theory i should love FFXII the game got rid of the crappy love stories, the main character is blatantly not the main character, and there is Balthier (AKA the leading man), however when it came to gameplay i hated FFXII so much, from the battle system to the constant need to do side quests. needless to say i didn't finish FFXII in fact i got to a point where I'm walking across stupid spires in a desert when i said enough.
Since the release of FFXII i have gone and played the FFII remake and FFIX both of which were fine, FFIX is quite a good game and really should not get the grief that it gets, but then i could see why people whoud dislike it after playing VII and VIII.


This Week... (15th June 09)

I have wanted to do a regular blog for a long time now but I know I couldn't do an in-depth one for a long time. So I have decided to a quick fire blog in the style of The Fast Show's Jesse's Diets.

...I have been playing.

I finally got a 360 back from the repairs but sadly, it wasn't mine, in fact, it was a new one. Am I happy? No. You see while I get a free Elite I don't get my hard drive back, this means I have to re-download all my DLC. This Plus a still busted PC equals wasted gaming time.
So this week has been spent dedicated to Oblivion, and you know it's a fun game and the world is one I can easily get invested in, unlike Fallout 3 where I play the game like a game and not like a person in that world

...I have been Reading.

I Decided to catch up on Deadpool so I picked up; Deadpool #10, Deadpool #11, Deadpool: Games of Death,
Deadpool Suicide kings #2 and Deadpool: Suicide kings #3. Now don't get me wrong i like Deadpool, but that's allot of the Merc with a Mouth so I'm Deadpool'ed out for about a month. A quick ranking is:
  1. Deadpool #11
  2. Suicide kings #2
  3. Deadpoll #10
  4. Suicide kings #3
  5. Games of death

...I have been listening to.

3 new songs hit my ipod this week,
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