Middle School Bans Broness

Two notorious trouble makers caught in the act! What are our schools coming to!?
Working in public schools I've seen and heard about my fair share of idiotic school rules. I've seen students expelled for turning in a boyscout knife they accidentally left in their jacket pocket, large swaths of the color wheel and the entire alphabet banned from student clothing, and the elimination of all forms of competition and celebration in the classroom, but this rule just issued by the administration at East Shore Middle School in Connecticut takes the cake. After a series of rampant groin kickings at their school the principal decided that the obvious solutio n was to BAN ALL FORMS OF PHYSICAL CONTACT. That includes shaking hands, high fives, pats on the back, hugging, kissing, virtually all forms of horse play, and, of coarse, the fist bump! Now I could lists a whole host of reasons why this rule is not only ludicrous on its face but also virtually unenforceable, but I think this rule speaks for itself. Congratulations East Shore administraition, your school finally made the news! You really showed the world just how well you can handle regular school discipline problems. Hope you're proud of yourselves!

The new "SyFy" Channel

My disgust with the SciFi Channel has reached a new zenith with this announcement first brought to my attention by the folks over at Penny Arcade. I'm tempted to say I

Just looks like yet another a nail in a coffin to me
can grow no more disenchanted with the channel than this, that my long, rocky, and dare I say masochistic relationship with the station has finally crashed jarringly to its bottom. If the last several years have taught me anything, however, it's that every time I think I've climbed to the highest peak of revulsion and based disgust with how they handle everything from their programing to their PR possible I'll only arise to find yet another higher summit looming into view; it can, and likely will, get worse from here... much worse.

I've suspected it for some time but, with this new name change and its accompanying press release, now it's official; the "SyFy" channel has utter disregard, if not outright contempt, for its "geeky" audience. Makes you wonder why they got into the Sci-Fi business in the first place.


The Best Commercial to Never See American Shores

Hark! Ghostbusters fans! Mythbusters fans! Hear me and rejoice for I present to you now the greatest work of art to ever be conceived of by man for your visual and aural enjoyment!


Talk about product synergy! That was a commercial for Mythbusters (obviously) that was aired some time last year in Germany. They may be getting episodes over a year after us here in The States, but I'd have to guess that that one commercial alone almost makes up for it!


The Great Hamburger/Sandwich Debate

For those of you not in the know, there currently rages a debate in the Hamburger from of epic proportions; is a hamburger a sandwich? Partly because I have an ego the size of a small zeppelin, and partly because I just got tired of looking at that blank spot for blog entries on my profile, I have decided to post my addition to this debate here to be preserved immemorial.

"Now to throw a wrench in the works.

Is this a sandwich? I say NO!
We all agree that, as most dictionaries state, a sandwich is two pieces of bread with meat betwixt, and so from this many would argue that a burger must therefor be a sandwich. HOWEVER allow me to remind you fair forum goers [and blog readers] of the most bizarre of permutations of the burger; the low carb burger! A healthy portion of fried ground beef placed snugly between two large slices of lettuce  with all of the usual condiments. With few exceptions I would presume that most here would agree that this is indeed a burger. So how then could a burger be both considered a sandwich AND include within its ranks the likes of the low carb burger? For this reason I submit to you wise men and women that a burger is in fact NOT a sandwich!"

Thank you and good night!