By GlenTennis 16 Comments
Games that need more Mike Haggar
Mayor of Earth Mike Haggar. He's a family man. He's a professional wrestler. He's a mustachioed lead pipe and overall connoisseur. Sadly Haggar has only been in a handful of games, like the Final Fight series and, more recently, Marvel vs. Capcom 3. I think it's high time that Haggar makes more appearances, and here are some suggestions. Here's a picture of him piledriving a shark.
| 1. Dead Space 2 |
Sure, beating the shit out of necromorphs with your bare, muscular hands would take some of the suspense out of the game, but those aliens had it coming. Maybe then I could even beat Hardcore mode.
| 2. 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand |
YO HAGGAR, HIT THAT BIG-ASS RAMP! Also I'm pretty sure watching Haggar piledrive a racist helicopter would be the best thing ever.
| 3. Gal Gun |
From what I understand in this game you fight off lusty ladies. Then wouldn't it make sense that the manliest man is the one doing the fighting?
| 4. Food Fight |
Charlie Chuck and Mike Haggar would make a great team, and you could get some sweet, sweet revenge on those asshole chefs.
| 5. Mass Effect 3 |
I don't want a starring role for Haggar in this, but a mere mention of his name when you find out the first Krogan was the result of Mike Haggar impregnating a female komodo dragon in space.
| 6. Jurassic Park |
Beating up veloceraptors. Need I say more?
| 7. Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare |
How much more emotional impact would that notorious nuke scene have if it was actually Mike Haggar piledriving the bomb into [Middle Eastern Country]?
| 8. Pikmin |
Mike Haggar happens to have a soft spot for those little colorful dudes, so he will RIP OUT THE THROAT OF ANYTHING THAT COMES CLOSE TO THEM.