Games that need more Mike Haggar

Games that need more Mike Haggar

Mayor of Earth Mike Haggar. He's a family man. He's a professional wrestler. He's a mustachioed lead pipe and overall connoisseur. Sadly Haggar has only been in a handful of games, like the Final Fight series and, more recently, Marvel vs. Capcom 3. I think it's high time that Haggar makes more appearances, and here are some suggestions. Here's a picture of him piledriving a shark.
 

1. Dead Space 2

Sure, beating the shit out of necromorphs with your bare, muscular hands would take some of the suspense out of the game, but those aliens had it coming. Maybe then I could even beat Hardcore mode.

2. 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand

YO HAGGAR, HIT THAT BIG-ASS RAMP! Also I'm pretty sure watching Haggar piledrive a racist helicopter would be the best thing ever.

3. Gal Gun

From what I understand in this game you fight off lusty ladies. Then wouldn't it make sense that the manliest man is the one doing the fighting?

4. Food Fight

Charlie Chuck and Mike Haggar would make a great team, and you could get some sweet, sweet revenge on those asshole chefs.

5. Mass Effect 3

I don't want a starring role for Haggar in this, but a mere mention of his name when you find out the first Krogan was the result of Mike Haggar impregnating a female komodo dragon in space.

6. Jurassic Park

Beating up veloceraptors. Need I say more?

7. Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare

How much more emotional impact would that notorious nuke scene have if it was actually Mike Haggar piledriving the bomb into [Middle Eastern Country]?

8. Pikmin

Mike Haggar happens to have a soft spot for those little colorful dudes, so he will RIP OUT THE THROAT OF ANYTHING THAT COMES CLOSE TO THEM.

16 Comments
18 Comments
Posted by GlenTennis

Games that need more Mike Haggar

Mayor of Earth Mike Haggar. He's a family man. He's a professional wrestler. He's a mustachioed lead pipe and overall connoisseur. Sadly Haggar has only been in a handful of games, like the Final Fight series and, more recently, Marvel vs. Capcom 3. I think it's high time that Haggar makes more appearances, and here are some suggestions. Here's a picture of him piledriving a shark.
 

1. Dead Space 2

Sure, beating the shit out of necromorphs with your bare, muscular hands would take some of the suspense out of the game, but those aliens had it coming. Maybe then I could even beat Hardcore mode.

2. 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand

YO HAGGAR, HIT THAT BIG-ASS RAMP! Also I'm pretty sure watching Haggar piledrive a racist helicopter would be the best thing ever.

3. Gal Gun

From what I understand in this game you fight off lusty ladies. Then wouldn't it make sense that the manliest man is the one doing the fighting?

4. Food Fight

Charlie Chuck and Mike Haggar would make a great team, and you could get some sweet, sweet revenge on those asshole chefs.

5. Mass Effect 3

I don't want a starring role for Haggar in this, but a mere mention of his name when you find out the first Krogan was the result of Mike Haggar impregnating a female komodo dragon in space.

6. Jurassic Park

Beating up veloceraptors. Need I say more?

7. Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare

How much more emotional impact would that notorious nuke scene have if it was actually Mike Haggar piledriving the bomb into [Middle Eastern Country]?

8. Pikmin

Mike Haggar happens to have a soft spot for those little colorful dudes, so he will RIP OUT THE THROAT OF ANYTHING THAT COMES CLOSE TO THEM.

Posted by MetalMoog

I disagreed when I clicked the post title. Now that I've seen him Pile Drive a Shark, I couldn't agree more.

Posted by groin

Games need more steel pipes.

Posted by Video_Game_King

Why does that sound like something Christopher Walken would say?

Posted by Harbinger_Of_Hippos

Could Mike Haggar handle this pure badassery?
Posted by JJOR64

Every game needs Haggar.

Posted by Dalai

If Mike Haggar was in SimCity, I could've saved a ton of money and real estate by not building police stations... because he is a one-man police force.

Edited by LordXavierBritish

I was disappointed to not just see "All of them. All the games." in bolded H3 text.

Posted by Underachiever007

All games need more Mike Haggar.

Posted by SethPhotopoulos

Tropico 3 
 
The mayor of Tropico.

Posted by Wrighteous86

Mike Haggar needs to join the Mario Bros. and show them what having a mustache is all about.

Posted by PooffBallzZzZ

Kane and Lynch 3 with Mike Haggar?  
He could kick some serious punk ass =D 
Posted by Skullo

Mike Haggar should be given a Spinning Pile Driver in MvC3.  SPDs make everything better.

Posted by ViciousAnchovy
@Skullo said:
" Mike Haggar should be given a Spinning Pile Driver in MvC3.  SPDs make everything better. "
Mike Haggar should also have been in Power Rangers SPD, to show the rangers what SPD really stands for.
Posted by FesteringNeon

You totally forgot the true #1, obvious Mike Haggarless omission.
.... and for a baseball fan i'm quite disappointed in you, my newly followed friend. 
With a sweet moustache like that, that ripped motherfucker would spin punch the shit out of the good ol leather and laces in MLB11!
Home Run Derby? MIke Haggar calls bullshit. Henceforth, from this day forward it shall be called the new Grand Slam Piledriver.  

Posted by VicRattlehead
@JJOR64
Every game needs Haggar.
@LordXavierBritish
I was disappointed to not just see "All of them. All the games." in bolded H3 text.
@Underachiever007
All games need more Mike Haggar.
Edited by tshirtarts

Piledriver Piledriver Piledriver

what a cool character!