By HumanityPlague 53 Comments
Ok, here are a few of my thoughts:
Firstly, I generally don't mind/care about female gamers. I care about gamers. If they have boobs, fine, if they have chest hair, fine, if they have a tail, fine. I ONLY care about gamers, and their ability/enjoyment of games.
Second: This video is a COMPLETE FUCKING ABORTION:
This single video exemplifies entirely what is wrong with the female gamer/geek culture. Let me count the ways....
1. There's NO way that fucking video gets made if Clare Grant (chick dressed as Lara Croft) wasn't married to Seth Green. No fucking way on Earth. If you'll notice, she's the one featured the most prominently....wonder why....
2. Why is Starbuck in front of a bunch of Stormtroopers?
3. Cute how Robot Chicken and "Hatchet" are prominently displayed as the "nerdy" dvd's, isn't it?
4. Who actually uses "l33t sp34k" (leet speak) in real life? If one of my friends said that, I'd beat the shit out of him.
5. What exactly is it with the fat guy dressed as the Flash?
6. The entire goddamn point of the video is (theoretically) supposed to say "Take me seriously as a gamer. Yes, I might be female, and attractive (based on your own tastes), but that doesn't exclude me from knowing about things we both enjoy." Instead, they portray themselves as essentially blow-up dolls, only existing to cater to men's sexual whims. I'll point to them dressing in badly-made cosplay costumes, and them being naked with "nerdy" stuff covering their sexual organs. Hey, you having an S-Rank in The Darkness, or Team Fortress 2 is nerdy. Having CGI lightsabers covering your boobs? NOT nerdy.
7. Playing Halo doesn't make you geeky, a gamer, l33t, or anything else. I will repeat this a billion times if needed, but once should be enough. Halo is a fine FPS, but it is NOT the end-all be-all for fucking shooters.
8. Am I the only one seriously creeped out by Clare Grant's green eyeliner? It looks clownish.
9. I will repeat point 7 only with "WoW" in the title. If your only experience in gaming is playing WoW, it's time for Timmy to take you to the shed to put a bullet in your skull. It's just the humane thing to do. I will digress on this later, if my blood pressure can take it, but there is a fundamental problem in MMO's. Mainly, that you can *never* win. You can/will NEVER beat WoW, Everquest, Aion, or any of the others. It is literally impossible to. The only way you can truly beat an MMO, is to turn the fucker off, so you can regain a modicum of your life/sanity back.
10. I would, love, *LOVE* to put any of those 4 women through Giant Bomb's trivia system. I'm currently ranked something like 40, having answered around 6,500 questions, and having an average of around 60% or so. I would love to see how well they do on it.
11. Here's the most ironic thing to me, there's a "director's cut" of the video. It runs a minute and a half longer and has a whole intro for Seth Green's character. Here:
Two things about this version: 1. It adds a pretty funny popcorn gag in it. And 2. The first woman shown with Seth, Mikaela Hoover, is LIGHT-YEARS more attractive than the 4 women in the video, combined. So, apparently, she had to go, because upstaging them with her beauty, and class, is a no-no.
Ok, video-rant over. Back to original point, there are tons of geeky/gamer girls out there, whether or not you like them. Leigh Alexander, Babs on Comic Vine, Amanda on Blistered Thumbs (on Twitter she's VelvetVelour), Candace at PDP, among many others. These four I mentioned (and others) are all attractive in their own ways, either physically, or mentally, but they do not overtly advertise it, or preach it. I think a lot of guys would agree that Babs is an attractive woman, physically. While that is true, it is her actually KNOWING shit, and having the capacity to detail her thoughts into rational, respectable viewpoints, is what makes her special.
Bottom line: Be a gamer, or a geek, period. Don't draw attention to yourself, and draw distinctions on what makes you different. Instead, try and focus on what makes you the same as everyone else. Also, don't be an asshole who is only trying to suck-up to males.
...I'm looking at you Olivia Munn for that last one...