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InnerBlueAbyss

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Going Home, and Why

I don't write these much anymore cause it seems rather pointless, but I feel the want to type.

So as most of you know I believe Ive been formulating plan's on moving back to LA. 

1.  For those of you who don't know, things here job wise went to shit and all my plans are pretty much pushed beyond the brink of my patience.  That said meaning getting our own/my own place.  Cant afford it with my Student Loans, and she hasnt been able to get a steady 40 hr 9to5 job since ive been here so we cant afford it together.  Im tired of not having my OWN place, space, etc.  Ive lived in her parents house far to long.

2.  Weather.  Worst weather this state has seen in 100 years, and it prolly will just get worse.  I was stuck in that house for 2 weeks straight due to snow, and any lesser man would  have put a bullet in his own head at times during that time as I like to think my buddy Steve would say.

3.  Nothing to goddamn do.  Really this state is boring as fuck, my dad was right about that.  Doesn't really help that the things you might wanna do take 2 hours to get to
 and on top of that are far and few between.  Seattle as a city is ok for a little bit, but unless you actually want to do something that doesn't involve eating, drinking overpriced dirtwater, or walking along the usually freezing coast, your fucked.

4.  The Job.  Yea I don't give a fuck who reads this, yes the goddamn job.  First they layoff a metric ton of people, don't even give an official statement until after the fact with a coldblooded non sense speech by the "CEO" than laying off more people.  Raise's (A raise I rightfully fucking earned) freezes, no hiring to make up for the lack of bodies to pick up the phone (a.k.a Good Customer Service), loss of all the benefits that made this job stand out.  People backstabbing other people, lots of shit talking, departments dividing and becoming cult like, the top brass being passive and indecisive, and the lies just mount.  I could go on and on about the job itself.  Betrayal is the phrase of the year.

Told my boss I need to be paid at my cap or else I would be going else where.  Im not sitting here for another year to get canned and or never see what we in this office should be making in the first place.

Don't get me wrong I dont regret moving here, its been a life experience, and it was always an experiment that I gave my best shot.  I can go home and say I gave it my all.  Its time to go back for me, I cant go on in this situation.  Id rather be jobless in debt without the overbearing stress than to continue commuting 2 1/2 hours a day each way to a job that doesn't give a fuck about me and is just getting worse attitudes wise and work load wise for minimal pay as far as im concerned for that the work load and level of knowledge necessary is.

Ive met some really good people here, and made friends with an awesome couple who also live on the island (Adam and Amanda).  Unfortunately when I go (We, im not sure), I wont be back here for quite some time to visit.  Its a good area for kids to grow up in alot of ways, and since they have kids I wouldn't suggest they go elsewhere at this point.

Music wise I feel my writing is progressing wonderfully.  I am creating theme's which I base and then write on from there.  Technically I think im peaking, as a person who works for a living and doesn't have the luxury of a teenager to practice all day really nullifies attempting to train myself with anything demanding a higher technical prowess.  I can out play most, I have my own general writing style and sound, thats good enough for me.  Maybe after the fact I might seriously go into an actual class and learn what notes are what on the guitar, new chords and theory, the stuff you cant learn by self teaching.

 Jon had a dream that he wanted to start a record label, which falls into my want to own a music shop with a recording studio, which falls in line with Timmy becoming a recording engineer.  Lines up pretty well in an odd way.  I have for some time thought of opening a shop with higherend insterments, not that 10 dollar 4x4 toneless all in one package bullshit Guitar Center and Sam Ash mostly sell.  Im talking carrying the real deal, and fine tune them so when a customer comes in, its ready to gig/record right on the spot, not the 1cent tin fishwire they put on at GC and SA.  Lot of differences.  On top of that I wanted to setup a small recording studio that we would charge a onetime flat fee for amateur bands who want to press a professional sounding disc master.  $300 to $500 for a disc, 10 tracks etc, that Timmy could master for people not willing ot knowledgeable to do it on their own with todays home studio kits.  So when he mentioned it, I can see how it could eventually work out.  Cant do that here though.

The opportunity here have dried up, and I am mentally and physically fed up with it all.  Once I have the money to drive back and have enough to pay bills for one or two months, I will be going home.

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