jakob187's forum posts

#1 Edited by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

I might finally fund a video game on Kickstarter. If I had the full amount myself, I'd hand-deliver that shit myself. Goddamn, I want this NOW!

Also, a November release date?! EVEN BETTER!

#2 Posted by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

There's the type like me that can drive the DM nuts, who questions things down to a level of minutia about surroundings and everything else, then when my party wants to do something, I do something completely ridiculous that works out.

For instance, there was one campaign where we were 3rd level against a camp of three orcs and a guy that was a boar rider (he was 5th level). The DM tried to play it where this guy was 100% armor covered and had no openings at all. I was a halfling rogue, so I snuck around all the time looking for weaknesses to exploit. Finally, while I was stealthed and maneuvering to flank behind this guy while my party was setting up elsewhere, I started asking about all kinds of things after a search and a perception check:

  • Height of the boar
  • Height of the man
  • What type of armor is he wearing?
  • What type of weapon is he using?
  • Where are the other people we'd be fighting?
  • Does the boar have any armor?
  • What is the disposition of the boar? Angry, happy, war-hardened, etc?
  • What is the disposition of the rest of his troops?
  • Is there a lot of food around this camp?
  • What is the weather like right now?

I mean, every little thing you could think about. While all of this seems a bit weird to ask, I had reasons for all of it. Since we were in a dense forest and it was warm outside, it means that the man covered completely in armor on this giant boar is most likely sweating his ass off, which means he would most likely have sweat in his eyes, which burns like crazy after a while. He was wearing chainmail armor, which meant that it could be pierced by specific types of metal. However, his helm was separate from the chest piece, meaning that there was going to be at least a slit of space between both pieces of armor that would expose either a leather coif or bare skin. It was the latter rather than the former. There wasn't a lot of food around the camp, which meant that they were having to ration out heavily most likely and probably a bit famished. The boar only had a leather saddle on him, which meant that while he was a dire boar (so his disposition was pissed off all the time), he wasn't going to be very happy about a guy trying to get him killed in battle. They are generally ill-tempered, and the fact that this guy was able to tame it to the point of riding it was especially interesting. Moreover, dire boars also have incredible scent (they get a +12 to Perception...and I was able to beat it out on a check to ensure he couldn't smell me, which meant I was constantly at an advantage in this fight). The rest of the troops, as it turned out, weren't very happy with their leader not having food for them. The height of the boar was about 6 foot, and the guy himself was about 6'7".

Therefore, with all of the information that I had gathered from this, I did the following:

I told the party to engage the fight. They caught everyone's attention. Meanwhile, when my combat turn came up, I decided to do the smart thing. I told the DM that I was going to run up behind the guy on the boar, using my acrobatics to run up the haunch of the boar's back legs and jump to grab onto the shoulders of the man, then drive my blade into the back of this guy's neck through the slit between his helm and his chest armor. The DM asked why I was being so crazy about it.

"Well, I'm planning on becoming a swashbuckler through prestige, and this is what I reckon a swashbuckler would end up doing. Is this something beyond my capability?"

"Roll the dice, we'll see what happens."

He had me roll for acrobatics and dexterity check as part of the maneuver itself (only charged me a minor action), and then I rolled for my attack. Crit hit. Rolled again. Crit threat. Rolled again. Stabbed his ass in the next, which led to him becoming paralyzed. He fell off the boar.

Afterwards, I screamed to his party members "he's a head on a stick, he can do nothing, and you have your chance to overthrow him for letting you starve, mates!"

They killed him for us, became our allies, and in turn, they allowed our half-orc Flint to tame the dire boar (which he named Betsy...and funny enough, he had been putting points into Handle Animal just in case some stupid shit like this came up), and we provided them with some salt jerk in return for their help.

THAT is why I love D&D. Nonetheless, I've been told I'm a difficult player to have in a party solely because I will question everything and leave no stone unturned, so it's difficult to pull one over on me. I'm also deceitful as fuck. While my whole party is sleeping, I'll go off on my own in the middle of the night and have my own entire solo adventure. Literally, they will all be role-playing or whatever, and I'm passing notes to the DM the entire time that I've snuck out, that I want to go explore a cave, then find a bunch of awesome loot...most of which I can't use. I actually buried loot in a place before a snowfall was coming into town. Why? Because if I couldn't use the shit, no one was gonna use it. My party never found them, and when they questioned where I had gotten my new leggings, I told them that I'd had them the entire time. My Bluff checks were so high that even the goddamn paladin in our group couldn't know that I was lying through my teeth!

#3 Posted by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

I think, as huge of a fan I am of the LoK universe, I'm glad they cancelled this. Nothing about it seemed challenging or worthwhile to me, but beyond that, I think I've finally gotten real real real real reeeeeeeeal tired of the Batman combat system. Regardless of that, I did like the amount of color in that world. I wish more games would be that colorful. It's probably why I've been enjoying so many Wii U games lately (besides how good they are).

#4 Edited by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

You can spend the low, low price of free for all things that are D&D necessary. Wizards has all of the sheets available on their website, and there are plenty of places that have the Monster Manuals, Classes/Races, Player's Handbook, etc online (although they may not be "legit" or whatever). Beyond that, you just need some dice (and trust me when I say that EVERYONE has a set of D&D dice laying around, even if they didn't know they do...those things fucking multiply like crazy). If you can't find some dice for free, then ask around. Hell, I have an entire goddamn bag of D&D dice, and I'd be more than okay with sending you some D&D dice for a full party.

As for stories, homebrewing is probably one of the best and most fulfilling things, but it's definitely not quite something to begin with. 5e is honestly the most solid place to start at this point. The way they've streamlined that rule set is both smart and fun.

Hope you have fun, man!

#5 Posted by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

Yes, I have, and I still put it in my top 3 films ever. It shows a golden age of acting that is long lost today, and the shooting techniques/cinematography/camera work is still absolutely fucking amazing.

#6 Posted by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

The fact that Kahn directed this to be a joke against Hollywood and their constant need to reboot childhood franchises into dark, gritty bullshit with dubstep just makes it that much better.

#7 Posted by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

1. Halo has always been M, and I honestly never understood why. They aren't dropping a ton of F bombs or anything in there, and when it comes to the actual violence part, it's not that much worse than the T-rated Bad Company.

2. The ratings system and the ESRB has always been terrible at actually nailing what exactly a game should fall under. It's one of the reasons I hate ratings systems altogether. I mean, how is it that Transformers (the terrible movie) gets PG-13 when they are using a woman as a sexual objectification and saying "shit" chained together over and over? How was Dogma going to get NC-17 because of the Golgothan shit demon?

3. Don't care what the rating is. I want to play it. Then again, I never finished City and I still haven't touched Origins. Asylum was still the best, hands-down. It was just the right amount of space, storyline, gameplay, and collectibles IMO. City got too big too fast, and every time I watched someone play Origins, I felt like bile was starting to churn up in my stomach to be exited from my mouth. Nonetheless, I still want to see what Knight has going on for it.

#8 Edited by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

It's just porn. You can redownload it.

That's a j/k, just to make sure you know.

#9 Posted by jakob187 (22335 posts) -
#10 Posted by jakob187 (22335 posts) -

DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!