No, no it doesn't. What did I want GTA Chinatown Wars to be when I first heard about it back in July? In short, I wanted it to be some retro, stylized top-down goodness. So Nintendo Power recently released a little feature on the game, and little did I know that Rockstar was going to give me just that, M-rated and cell-shaded goodness. It was actually quite a bit better than I expected after reading people's impressions of the game, but I was quick to realize that they're all full of shit. After seeing a few of these shots, I really dig the artstyle. And if the controls work well, I can see this being a LOT of fun. 

Here is a quick run down on the features and impressions courtesy of Nintendo Power:

• True GTA game - sandbox gameplay, open-world environment, gritty crime narrative.
• Isometric camera angle.
• Cel-shaded polygons w/ black borders, (which is a very cool look in my book).
• Tasteful, well-implemented touch controls and mini-games.
• UI based on a PDA - hub for email, contacts, map, music player, GPS, stat-tracking.
• Stats uploaded to Rockstar Social Club website.
• "Portable" arcade-style mission design for shorter periods.
  

  Asian grimacing while dead, dying, or unconscious.
• Simple aim with the control pad, targetting with the R-button.
• Subtle drive-assist.
• Quickly jump back into the action if you fail a mission.
• Flamethrower, chain-gun. 
• Liberty City modeled well throughout the game.
• Solid load times, frame rates, and draw distances.
• Abundant pedestrians/cars on-screen.
• Wanted system - objective is to disable police cars any way possible.
• Real-time weather effects, 24-hour day/night cycle.
• Tons of radio stations.

Asian chaos!

All the screenshots above were the first "batch" of scans from Nintendo Power. To me, that looks great, but when I say that, I'm imagining the game.. on a DS Lite screen.. in motion. So I was taken aback by how much negativity people were giving a game they hardly knew anything about. Here are a few (of many) comments left on the illustrious and always intelligent Gamespot forums:

"that looks awful"

"Looks pretty terrible. I'll stick with Liberty City Stories."

"I think I just threw up in my mouth a little..."

"As soon as I saw those images, immediately I was depressed..."

"Wow Rockstar, don't even bother."

"Ugh. This looks like trash."

And I could go on, but what's the point. Excuse my language for a bit here, but people are fucking dumb (imagine me saying that in a George Carlin voice). Not only is everyone completely overreacting to a couple of magazine scans, they are unable to see beyond the low quality shots and unusual aesthetic. It's almost like they've forgotten who's making the game.

Anyway, another batch of shots came in that confirmed my brilliant opinion. This game is going to look great in motion on the DS.

Night car chase, my favorite shot.

Asian female driver.

This shot looks really cool, and I don't know why.

I can't wait to play this. Am I alone?