Diary of Your Creepy Friend : read this with a british accent.

BattleHOLYCOWIT'SATANKField

IM TOO SEXY FOR MY SHIRT TOO SEX...

So i've recently been playing battlefield 3 and boy this game isn't anywhere near the quality i thought it would be. my biggest gripe so far is the size of the maps and lack of destruction, i mean really it feels like the series took three steps back and i can't figure out why. the gameplay is far better than any other title in the series and the only title i can think of that is close to it is BF1943. but the god-damn size of the maps and lack of destruction gets on my nerves sometimes so friggin much, i mean really what stopped them? i can't think of any reason why we can't make buildings collapse, and i can't figure out why so many buildings that should be completely explorable are locked. when i imagined BF3 maps i thought it was bigger than BC2 and it allowed us to hide in any building and destroy any bulidng we want so that only rubble is left. the gameplay is exactly what i wanted the series to have,

I think that Caspian Border is the only map that really feels like a BF map and it's quite mediocre and graphically weak compared to the other maps, i also hate how conquest on it is always random, they should have done the "phase" thing in BC1 where after conquring one node it locks and you move on to the next. it keeps the action all in one place without making the other areas barren of life. what's the point of a large map if people are going to spend 95% of their time splitting in groups and pretending like they're in TDM. i really see what the BF3 players mean what they say that the current players aren't from the BF series at all.

The problems doesn't stop there, the jets are god-damn awful, they are nowhere near as fun and exciting as 1943 and are such a pain to level. the fact that most maps only have 2 planes on the air most of the time makes me cry as the epic dog fights that are in 1943 made the experience for me, their absence in BC bugged me as it would be like taking out tanks but leaving vehicles. i really wish that the PC version has more jets in the maps because if both console and PC versions have the same plane limit then consider me furious i won't stop myself from stealing all of DICE's employes left shoes or *gasp* steal their coffee maker, you have been warned folks. the classic moments of looking around and seeing a tank canon Staring at you is still priceless.

Oh and i would like to applaud DICE for making the console version look terrific considering the tech limitations. fantastic job guys.

GTA V

It seems that Rockstar learned their lesson with GTAIV and is finally giving us a proper GTA. i frigging cannot wait for this and i damn hope that it comes out next octobor instead of sometime in 2013. SO EXCITED!!!111

Lack of Excitement for "Major" releases this month : a sign of menopause?

Wait a minute last i checked (which was just now just fyi) Im a guy and im not in my 50's (at least to my knowledge) so i don't know why menopause came to mind.

The only title this month that i am truly excited for is WWE12 and that is because im a big wrestling fan. the create-a-show and improved features like being able to injure a star and put them out of the game, the improved WWE Universe mode which generates unlimited random maps is so damn exciting. last year SvR11's universe mode lasted me 5 months, which is more bang for my buck than any other game i've tried. the only thing that got boring is the gameplay which they're fixing this year and now looks fantastic.

I would like to mention also that THQ's treatment of their fans recently is fantastic and better than any other company out there, and their DLC pricing puts other companies to shame too. you can get all DLC for 800 ms points or buy each indivdual wrestler for 80 ms, 80 MS!! that is the price of an icon on the xbox live market. that is the kind of pricing that other companies would never dare to use, EA would have charged us 400 MS for each wrestler and 1200 ms just for one pack. i think THQ is a great company that other companies should strive to be like because it's only a matter of time before DLC dies down after EA raises the prices too much.

Yeah anyway back to topic, I both find myself unable to get excited for Skyrim or any other big title launching. i plan on picking it and the others up but i don't feel like as anxious as i am for WWE12. i don't know honestly if im the only one who feels that way but i felt like mentioning it.

THEME OF THIS BLOG

Pain Journal

Recently my doctor told me to write down a pain journal for all the pain i felt and what is a better place than here?

Journal Begin:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! DEAR GOD AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

FRAK FRAK AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! AH AHA HA!!!!!!!!

DAMN YOU AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! IT HURTS SO BAD!!!!! DAMN THAT LOUSY DOCTOR TO HELL!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

FRAK FRAKK 2@$$#%#%$$#

AHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

OH DAMN DAMN DAMN OH SNAP!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Journal End.

4 Comments

Diary of a Deranged Gentleman: a lick of madness.

Have you ever seen a man run out of coffee or tea while completely drained out of his energy? no? well let's hope you don't because unless you conveniently happen to carry caffeine pills with you, you are about to become his meal.     

1 - Bad Habits


You see i tend to have a bad habit of leaving my games backlog grow to the point im looking at 900+ hours worth of gameplay ahead of me.  instead of grabbing one of them and making a small attempt at solving the problem i end up reaching for Black Ops. you see there is so much joy to be found in BO's hardcore mode, you could be lucky enough to run into a commanding cranky 14 year old who demands that you perform better and stop failing. Now I am a gentleman and avoid getting my hands dirty because it's hard to clean my hands when they're covered in blood and gun powder but sometimes you have to roll the hard six. 4 rounds of unloading a revolver into the kid's brain is the equivalent of a gaming nerd getting invited into his favorite game studio, it just feels good. when i am not killing my team-mates i am attempting to improve my photoshop skills which are abysmal at best. 
 
 I mean REALLY come on, how can you possibly put this level of skill to use?

2 - GAMING CAN MAKE YOUR BRAIN ROT


Researchers discovered several small regions in online addicts' brains shrunk, in some cases as much as a 10 to 20 percent. The affected regions included the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, rostral anterior cingulate cortex, supplementary motor area and parts of the cerebellum.

What's more, the longer the addiction's duration, the more pronounced the tissue reduction. The study's authors suggest this shrinkage could lead to negative effects, such as reduced inhibition of inappropriate behavior and diminished goal orientation.

Excuse me are you a girl? well you better stay away from me madam because i have reduced inhibition of my inappropriate behavior, i discovered this while humping the hood of a dodge charger and while im not comparing girls to cars it's better to be safe than sorry. I have went ahead and isolated myself from females to avoid cracking jokes about their bums or their twin valkyrie guns. i believe the world will benefit from this action so no harm will come from me.
 
But i also found out that i have diminished goal orientation, sometimes when i get up to go to the toilet i end up losing orientation and running straight into a wall instead ruining my good pants every time. i also don't work anymore because every time i pick up a pen i end up attempting to jab my lovely co-workers with it and facing assault charges. i am not very familiar with the law but i never realized you can gain an assault gun by harming your co-workers.
 
If you are a female and you're still here  then can i see your **** piece of (Content removed for verbal assualt)
 
OH COME ON, now you can get an assault gun by cursing? bloody hell. oh crap.
 
 

3 - Nyan Cat Fools


  For the past few weeks my  GentlemenBook Freinds have been spamming me with a picture of a cat crapping out a rainbow while being shoved into what appears to be one of those cursed fortune cookies all while broken glass floats in the air. am i supposed to laugh or cry? is this what my fellow gentleman find funny these days?
 
No no this is something far more sinister than that, you see this isn't the first time a cat meme has infected even the most smartest and respected people. there was another meme in which anime characters drawn in chibi style danced while either mimicking a bunny or a cat.
 
  
  
Oh no my dear readers it gets much MUCH worse. 
  
  It spread to the point protests around the world broke out and the media attempted to cover it as democracy problems which is a horse load of garbage. it got so bad to the point people stopped working and eating and started dancing and working. if this Nyan Cat meme somehow spreads at the same speed in the outside world our end will come sooner than we thought.
  

4 - FEMALE SHEPARD FREAK OUT BONANZA

 
A couple of weeks ago Bioware did an amazing move by giving the fans a choice on how female shepard will look like instead of getting us stuck with another sheploo.  female shepard 5 won by a massive vote count:  
When i first saw the 6 concepts this one looked like she was pissed and ready to rip your head if you mess with her. it's exactly how i imagined the default femshep to be and it made me super happy to see that people thought the same thing as well.  BUT WAIT! even though clearly this concept out-voted all the others by a massive vote count it seems like a small amount of fans are crying and screaming injustice about the choice even though clearly the community clearly chose who they wanted,  people are seriously pissed off like someone took away the create-a-character mode. 
 
Now i personally am a silent person and tend to keep away from messes like this but there is something hilarious that i noticed on almost every single site that had an editor complain about the design: almost all of them were females. i find that VERY funny especially since most of them worth their articles like they were sworn on blood to prevent this shepard from being used. you see they fail to see the obvious that which stares them in the face but the rest of the female characters are bland goths who look like a product of a human and a geth. seriously whoever designed the other characters wasn't thinking clearly (look at number four, how the hell does anyone think that she would fit as shepard?).  i consider this shepard to be a miracle because if she wasn't designed we would have Iranoutofmethwhilelivinginthestreets shepard and imtryingtobeagoth shepard clones. when ever i look at this designed i think of the bad-ass and hot starbuck, i don't think of scene girls or goth chicks.
I dare you to walk up to her and call her a scene girl.
I see a bad ass soldier who doesn't let her outer looks affect her. another example is buffy: 
 But of course using logic and popular examples of how hot blondes can still be bad-asses won't work with these kind of fans. oh no you see this is what they imagine the real female shepard to look like: 

  This is what they consider the "perfect" shepard. you see if square enix saw this thing in one of their games they would die from sever brain damage. have you ever seen a female soldier who looks like this? if you ever do please tell her to visit a good therapist because only a woman who hates herself would do that to her hair. there are plently of female soldiers in the army who have long hair but have it bunned, example: http://www.murdoconline.net/pics/withoutthemmanisnothing-thumb.jpg 

But who wants to see a boring bun? i don't know about you but im extremely excited to see how the hair physics will be with long hair for your character. the CAC system is STILL here if you don't like her! hell, even Jane from the first two games with red hair will be present as well! the only reason why people are freaking out is because of pure hate for good looking characters and wanting their crack-addicted shepard to be shoved down everyone's throats everywhere as the "real" shepard.
 
 
Thank you for reading my fellow gentlemen, if you experience any anger or confusing please drop me a private message and i will help you get back to being normal.
12 Comments

Finally finished Monster!


 I think i can see the ocean.

  I just finished Naoki Urasawa's Monster and i am blown away, i can safely name it as my favorite Show of all time.

If you haven't seen it yet you owe it to yourself to see it, it's a masterpiece that beats even live-action TV shows!

Currently there are three legal ways to get the show:
1- Download the English dubbed version from Amazon: [www.amazon.com]

2- Download it from Itunes
[itunes.apple.com]

3- Import all the Japanese DVD sets which are japanese only as far as i know.

Whichever way you decide to go with i highly recommend you to see it! 
 
 
SPOILER WARNING: 
The Posts below have spoilers for the end of the show so watch out!
13 Comments

Got ya you camping bastard!

Thought he was smart. i've been playing Minecraft and it's been two days since i started playing, you see i tried my best to create a good home as a starting point for a huge castle i was planning. however there was a fatal design choice that ended up nearly costing me my items and putting my home as a danger zone for a while.  before i explain let's look at my piss poor design choice corrected: 


My original home design was that yellow = door with no torches being placed outside,the wall with the red line didn't exist. i was in my merry way digging up the mountain on the second floor when i noticed that i was about to run out of torches and Pickaxes so i thought that i would go down stairs to start working on my bench (It's the brown table you see on the far left in the image.
 
 this was at night so when i got down i heard a arrow being shot which ended up landing on my character, i had no clue where it came from so i hid myself and just peeked my head just enough for him to shoot again when i finally saw where the arrow got shot from, see that pink paint in the yellow door sketch in the image? a skeletion was standing there like a turret being able to shoot me from nearly every angle in the room.
 
I had to think of a away to trap the skeletion alive so i remembered a tomb that acted like a trap in front of my door away, however it's outside and the door being watched over by the skeleton like a fucking nazi. i luckly had some rock blocks with me so i started planting them as a barrier between me and the door, the plan basically was to go in the same direction that the blue line is going in (starting from the right of the image ofc.) to a hidden door away that i sealed in case if something like this happened. 
 


See the two green lines? that's the hidden door away that i used. this was AFTER i fixed the door by changing the design a bit and placing torches, before there was a huge hole where the two lines are in front of the door way that acted as a way to trap creatures for kicks, this skeleton somehow made his way through it without falling and started camping right at my door. thankfully my brain started working pretty fast as to how to correctly trap the creature without getting myself killed. 
 




This is from the side hole near the green line (second entrance), i started digging under the red line and my plan was to make my way to my trap, seal it and place torches inside of it and THEN going under my door and digging under it so i can pull down the skeletion to where i was. the plan went smoothly and the skeletion came crashing down and tried to shoot me a couple of times. i built around him created the fixed door you see on top of him with a proud grin on my face.
 
Morning finally arrived and i decided to chop down some trees to get some wood supply. in the middle of my farming session all of sudden i see a skeleton englufed in flames shooting at me and chasing me in the bright daylight! i panicked and started running towards a cave to lose him, im pretty sure he died a short while after i entered the cave.
 
I wondered where the skeleton  came from and then it hit me, i went to see the skeletion that i trapped in the tomb and he is nowhere to be found and i can no longer hear his moaning/grunting. teleporting skeletons confirmed? either way it was such a fun random amazing experience that made me love the game even more.
7 Comments

WRUP GB? OCT 2010

What are you guys playing this month? Im currently going through Medal of Honor's Campaign with a few MP games here and there planned. i got invited to the Cataclysm Beta and plan on leveling a bunch of Worgens and Goblins. i have Castlevania and Vanquish stuck in the middle between the former games so ill be struggling to beat them before Fallout New Vegas comes out. 
 
WRUP?

10 Comments

Good job EA! you've wrecked MoH!

Just because you wanted to get this out before Black Ops you've wrecked the game right into the ground and showed us all how terrible you're at quality control.
 When i hopped into the campaign all i repeated was " What the fuck? are you kidding me? please tell me this is a joke."  here want me to list the problems?

  • The worst pop in's and muddy textures you'll ever see in your life.
  • Framerate drop, hate them? well MoH redefined it in this game by having you spend more time waiting for the game to keep up with the action than playing.
  • Horrible,horrible..AI. it's the worst AI this generation, you can stand in the middle of the battlefield and you won't be able to tell your enemies from your friends since they both avoid shooting you and do nothing at all when you get close to them. hell i had one pass right behind me and sit right next to me in cover.
Oh and the best part? i haven't touched the multiplayer yet so im excited to see how they'll wreck it since the beta was pretty smooth for me.
 
I hate you EA. i definitely hate you after ruining this great game by rushing it instead of giving it 5-6 months of development so the developers can polish it.  
 
For the record the campaign IS good, fuck. the sounds in this game are mind blowingly realistic. easily the best gun sounds i've heard this entire generation. this is a good game WRECKED by EA's greed, they wanted to jump the gun and release this game instead of letting Danger Close polish it for a couple of months.
 
But NOOOO! we have to get the game out because no one will buy this game for 5 years when BO comes out!  what a group of morons.....
Oh and to all the people saying that UE3 is a great engine on PS3? this a good example of a new developer getting pounded to the ground by the publisher to reach the deadline and having the engine do more damage than good. if they went with Frostbite we wouldn't have this mess of a game. save your money and wait till this game is 10$ bucks.
 
Fuck you EA. 
41 Comments

DR2 - what i hate and like so far + Some pixes.

Im really loving this game so far but there are a few things i have to point out since im such a huge fanboy of the original Dead Rising:
 
- Lower Number Of Zombies  X  After reaching day 2 in game the number of zombies increased to resemble the same amount in DR1.
 
- No Camera 
I was hoping that you would get a camera at some point in the game but nope, no camera what so ever. 
   
- Girl Otis  
Far FAR less annoying than him in the first game and when you answer here you only get a text instead of holding a phone while getting munched on by zombies.
 
 Somewhat minor spoilers ahead.


     
Im playing the PS3 version just FYI, it's performing quite well for a port.
31 Comments

Finally got DR2 after 4 years of waiting to only be welcomed by..

 *SPOILERS AHEAD AHOY!*
PS3 update..... really? out all the weeks Sony picked they decided it was this week? shot me in my heart will ya? T_T
 
In any case yep i got Dead Freaking Rising 2 on PS3, i plan on not sleep what so ever so look forward to hearing news about some guy who played DR2 until his eyes bled. ^^ 
 
Questions? leave them here, i plan on answering any question so when the 28 release date comes by you'll know what to expect. spoilers will be kept in spoiler tags ofc but i won't post anything story related just because some people are dicks and will try to spoil the story.  
 
14%.... i downloaded 4 gigs faster than that. :(  
 
What would chuck do?

65 Comments

*Spoilers* The Lincoln Park Scene from Mafia 2.....

 That had to be the most shocking and gruesome scene i've  ever seen in a video game, best scene in the entire game too.
 Hearing him scream and then the sound of the cleavers cutting through his flesh over and over again was absolutely disturbing, i honestly thought that he was getting beat up but when i saw them cutting him up i was speechless.
Out of all the character's Henry grew on me the most, he was one of those guys that you instantly feel like they're your friend and trust them the most. i don't care even though he was a rat he still didn't deserve that fate, a bullet to the head would have been better. I completely agree with Joe when he said who could do such a thing to a person.

The scene really made me emotional and pissed me off a lot. this game has to be one of my favorites of all time and it easily has a blockbuster quality soundtrack. i can't wait for Mafia 3.

What do you all think about the scene? did it came to you as a shock?
 
EDIT: added more to the post.

23 Comments

Just watched Inception...WOW!

 I went today to the theater to watch Inception, honestly i did not have that much of high hopes but after watching it from start to finish today all i can say is WOW over and over again, looks like we found the BladeRunner of our generations boys!  There were some points in the movie where i went "yes" at the great music and it's great timing with awesome scenes.  it's like someone took James Bond mixed it with Dark City and a perfect baby came out. really can't wait to get it on Blu-Ray! easily my favorite movie of the year and it will be one of those movies i will watch over and over again without getting bored. if you haven't seen the film you owe it to yourself to see this film in Theaters or iMax.
 
This film has a good chance of turning into a series in the far future. it just felt like a TV show at times than a movie.

46 Comments
  • 12 results
  • 1
  • 2