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MattyFTM

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SAY NO TO SANTA HATS!!!! SAY YES TO COMMUNISM AND ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!

By MattyFTM 26 Comments

This is a true story!!!!

 
No Caption Provided
Once upon a time on a fine November evening, a bear with a green hat and red bow tie is taking a gentle stroll through the Giant Bomb Forums. He is stopping to converse with people. Talking about his favourite video games with some random humour mixed in. Suddenly out of no where, he spots a forum thread titled "is that time again, GB". He is intrigued by such a vague premise. "What is it time for again?" he wonders aloud as his curiosity gets the better of him, and he enters the thread to investigate further. Upon entering the thread, he discovers a horror, an injustice that he could barely comprehend...
 
IT WAS A USER REQUESTING THAT PEOPLE PUT SANTA HATS ON THEIR AVATAR'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS HORRIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! To understand the full horror of this atrocity, we must revisit the start of this sad tale. "Once upon a time on a fine NOVEMBER evening". The bear was shocked that this could happen so early. He had to do something about it...
 
The bear quickly rushed to his secret lair, where he hatched a plan. He quickly drew up a shopping list and headed out the door to the supermarket: 

Tin Foil
Wire Coat Hangers
Red Dye No.2
A Sony Walkman
Elastic Bands
A Car Battery 
KY Jelly
Frozen Pizza
Yellow Paint
Cider
Fork Handles
An Audi A4 
A Hamster & Hamster Wheel

He returned with his shopping and entered his tool shed. For days bizarre noises came out of the shed, until finally the door opened, and what should exit...
No Caption Provided
A Robot Communist exited the shed. "SAY NO TO SANTA HATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" it shouted "SAY YES TO COMMUNISM AND ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!". The bear had created an anti-christmas pro-communism robot that will forever be known as "Robot Communist". As he walked down the street into the distance on his quest to rid the world of Christmas Hats, the screams of children could be heard. For all fear Robot Communist, and all will fear him for the rest of eternity.
 
And the moral of this story?
 
SAY NO TO SANTA HATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SAY YES TO COMMUNISM AND ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
26 Comments

26 Comments

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damnboyadvance

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Edited By damnboyadvance

Can I just use your other icon for the time being? I wanna be MattyFTM for a day!

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Red12b

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Edited By Red12b

Rather red than dead, wait that's not how it goes, 
 
Umm,  
 
Yeah I stick with that. 
 
I ran over sante clause, Hahahahahaha

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ZombiePie

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Edited By ZombiePie  Staff

All right I'm not going to lie after going through a long car drive and being forced to listen to nothing but Christmas tunes, I'm starting to side with robot communist. I mean Christmas is just soooo overrated, more than Halo 2 (yeah I went there).

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Claude

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Edited By Claude

Santa Hats are bigger this year than last year. There's no stopping Santa Hats, you hear me, nothing!

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ZeroCast

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Edited By ZeroCast


  Machinarium Robot >  Communist Robot!
  Machinarium Robot >  Communist Robot!
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lordofultima

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Edited By lordofultima

You're a fool. They play Christmas music in November all through retail chains, so Santa hats are fair game. 

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clubsandwich

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Edited By clubsandwich

I'll just leave this here.
 

No Caption Provided

:D
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LordAndrew

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Edited By LordAndrew

I still have my Christmas icon from last year saved up. I just... can't get to it. You win this time...

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Capum15

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Edited By Capum15
COMMUNISM IS THE VERY DEFINITION OF FAILURE!!! 
DEMOCRACY IS TRUTH! COMMUNISM IS DEATH!
 
/pro-Santa hat.
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ZombiePie

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Edited By ZombiePie  Staff

Well I like my avatar just the way it is, and that means without Communists, robots, and most importantly Santa hats. So I'm not sure whose side I'm on...

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Dalai

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Edited By Dalai

Never.

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MattyFTM

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Edited By MattyFTM  Moderator
@Sweep said:
" Woah, flashback from 2008:
 
 @MattyFTM said:

" Sweep said:

"MattyFTM said:
"I WANT PEOPLE TO STOP PUTTING SANTA HATS ON THEIR AVATARS!!!!!!!!!"
Anyone who doesn't put a santa hat on their avatar is some kind of robot. Or a communist. A robot communist.

Awesome."
Being a robot communist is sooooooooooo much cooler than having a Santa hat in you're avatar!!!!!!! "
  :D "
When you said that simple statement back in 2008 you had no idea of the long lasting repercussions. Happy days, happy days...
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DanielJW

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Edited By DanielJW
@MattyFTM: We have you surrounded, mate.  
 

No Caption Provided
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natetodamax

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Edited By natetodamax

Death is a preferable alternative to communism.

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sweep

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Edited By sweep  Moderator

Woah, flashback from 2008:
 
 

@MattyFTM

said:

" Sweep said:

"MattyFTM said:

"I WANT PEOPLE TO STOP PUTTING SANTA HATS ON THEIR AVATARS!!!!!!!!!"
Anyone who doesn't put a santa hat on their avatar is some kind of robot. Or a communist. A robot communist.

Awesome."
Being a robot communist is sooooooooooo much cooler than having a Santa hat in you're avatar!!!!!!! "
  :D
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Video_Game_King

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Edited By Video_Game_King

I am not anti-Christmas; I am anti-Satan Claus.

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MattyFTM

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Edited By MattyFTM  Moderator
@DanielJW said:
" @MattyFTM said:
" @DanielJW: YOU CAN DEFACE PICTURES OF THE COMMUNIST ROBOT, BUT YOU'LL NEVER CHANGE THE SENTIMENT THAT HE REPRESENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "
Well it would seem as though your own robot doesn't believe in your doctrine. Abandon all hope, for your regime shall fall under the weight of your own metallic beings. "
All you did was deface a picture. Robot Communist still stands strong. Nothing you can do will stop him!!!!!!!!!!!! 

@Video_Game_King said:
" Again, shall this communist robot aid in my quest to kill Satan Claus? "
This communist robot will aid in any anti-Christmas quest.
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aaox

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Edited By aaox
@Video_Game_King: I don't know about that guy, but I certainly will. 
Oh, what's that you're saying, little Communist Robot?  
 Why, that's simply poetic. I hereby name you 'Little Christmas Robot'.
 Why, that's simply poetic. I hereby name you 'Little Christmas Robot'.
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DanielJW

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Edited By DanielJW
@MattyFTM said:
" @DanielJW: YOU CAN DEFACE PICTURES OF THE COMMUNIST ROBOT, BUT YOU'LL NEVER CHANGE THE SENTIMENT THAT HE REPRESENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "
Well it would seem as though your own robot doesn't believe in your doctrine. Abandon all hope, for your regime shall fall under the weight of your own metallic beings.
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Video_Game_King

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Edited By Video_Game_King

Again, shall this communist robot aid in my quest to kill Satan Claus?

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MattyFTM

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Edited By MattyFTM  Moderator
@DanielJW: YOU CAN DEFACE PICTURES OF THE COMMUNIST ROBOT, BUT YOU'LL NEVER CHANGE THE SENTIMENT THAT HE REPRESENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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gearhead

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Edited By gearhead
@DanielJW said:
"
No Caption Provided
What's that you say? Your robot wants a Santa hat? Sure! "
Oh my god. Post of the year.
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DanielJW

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Edited By DanielJW

No Caption Provided
What's that you say? Your robot wants a Santa hat? Sure!
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Karmum

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Edited By Karmum

Change is what we want and change is what I believe in!
 
Be above the crowd!

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zeforgotten

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Edited By zeforgotten

Fumo,, Fumoffu.. Fumo.. 
(That means, you will never win evil commie bastard! 
BETTER DEAD THAN RED! 
BETTER DEAD THAN RED! 
 
I know, it's amazing that it means all that)

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MattyFTM

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Edited By MattyFTM  Moderator

This is a true story!!!!

 
No Caption Provided
Once upon a time on a fine November evening, a bear with a green hat and red bow tie is taking a gentle stroll through the Giant Bomb Forums. He is stopping to converse with people. Talking about his favourite video games with some random humour mixed in. Suddenly out of no where, he spots a forum thread titled "is that time again, GB". He is intrigued by such a vague premise. "What is it time for again?" he wonders aloud as his curiosity gets the better of him, and he enters the thread to investigate further. Upon entering the thread, he discovers a horror, an injustice that he could barely comprehend...
 
IT WAS A USER REQUESTING THAT PEOPLE PUT SANTA HATS ON THEIR AVATAR'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS HORRIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! To understand the full horror of this atrocity, we must revisit the start of this sad tale. "Once upon a time on a fine NOVEMBER evening". The bear was shocked that this could happen so early. He had to do something about it...
 
The bear quickly rushed to his secret lair, where he hatched a plan. He quickly drew up a shopping list and headed out the door to the supermarket: 

Tin Foil
Wire Coat Hangers
Red Dye No.2
A Sony Walkman
Elastic Bands
A Car Battery 
KY Jelly
Frozen Pizza
Yellow Paint
Cider
Fork Handles
An Audi A4 
A Hamster & Hamster Wheel

He returned with his shopping and entered his tool shed. For days bizarre noises came out of the shed, until finally the door opened, and what should exit...
No Caption Provided
A Robot Communist exited the shed. "SAY NO TO SANTA HATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" it shouted "SAY YES TO COMMUNISM AND ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!". The bear had created an anti-christmas pro-communism robot that will forever be known as "Robot Communist". As he walked down the street into the distance on his quest to rid the world of Christmas Hats, the screams of children could be heard. For all fear Robot Communist, and all will fear him for the rest of eternity.
 
And the moral of this story?
 
SAY NO TO SANTA HATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SAY YES TO COMMUNISM AND ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!