By MooseyMcMan 10 Comments
YO! Been working on these goals.
100% LA Noire, and 5-Star every case.Progress: COMPLETED! AHAHAHAHA! Well, except for the Reefer Madness DLC, which isn't out yet, but the game says I have 100% completion, and I have literally all of the Trophies except for the Reefer Madness ones. But I bought that DLC pack thing, so I'll play that when it's out. I really hope it involves punching druggies in the face.
Upload at least one good LittleBigPlanet 2 level.Progress: I'll get to it...Evenetually.
Become skilled at Marvel vs. Capcom 3Progress: Complete! Depending on how you define skilled, anyway. I'm probably out of practice, but whatever.
Acquire a copy of ZHP: Unlosing Ranger vs. Darkdeath EvilmanProgress: Complete!
S-Rank Deadly PremonitionProgress: It's looking less and less likely that I'll get a new Xbox this year, especially if we have to get a new TV. If that's the case, then I shan't complete this one.
Finish Alpha Protocol (with my friend).Progress: We'll finish it. Someday...
Beat Deus Ex: Human Revolution with zero kills.Progress: You know, as awesome as this game seemed in the early (and mostly not gameplay) trailers, word on the street is that it doesn't really seem to live up to its potential, at least based on what I've heard from people at E3. I'm still hopeful, and I'll probably buy it regardless, and try for this silly goal.
Try once again to beat Dead Rising (and probably not succeed).Progress: Without a working Xbox, this is pretty much impossible.
Buy and beat Dead Rising 2: Off the Record.Progress: I read somewhere that this game will be $40. I can't pass it up for that price, even if I had hoped that I could beat the first one before starting this one.
Don't buy this year's Call of Duty.Progress: Wait until it comes out. Then thou shalt see mein iron will!
Don't buy anything at GameStop.Progress: Goin' strong! You won't get any of my money this year, GameStop!
Buy at least one Wii game.Progress: I totally bought Red Steel 2. And that game is awesome. SO COMPLETE! AHAHA!
Beat Yakuza 3, then buy/beat Yakuza 4.Progress: Finished! OHO!
Buy the new Mortal Kombat game, and memorize some fatalities.Progress: Komplete!
Resist buying Portal 2 (or any other Valve product) until Valve gives some concrete info on the next Half-Life game.Progress: I see what you're doing Valve. You make Team Fortress 2 free, just to make people think you're all nice and junk, but really you just like tempting people with Half-Life, BUT THEN NEVER ACTUALLY MAKING ANOTHER ONE. Come on, Duke Nukem Forever came out! Yeah, it was terrible, but you don't want Half-Life to go the Shenmue rought, do you? Speaking of which...
Never give up on the other long rumored games I've been waiting for.
Progress: You know what would be great Wii U games? Metroid Dread and Shenmue III. I mean, the Wii U is pretty much the Dreamcast II, just like I predicted. It's coming out before the other systems, and will be kinda in-between in terms of power, and it's got a screen in the controller. THE DREAM IS TRUE! Sort of.
Get back my S-Rank in ME2.Progress: Not having a working Xbox sucks. All I want to do is give BioWare my money, but I can't.
See every hidden Calendar Man conversation in Batman Arkham City.Progress: I'll get back to you when I play this game. You know, when it's out later this year.
Sorry, but no new goals this time. I can't think of anything. I think I've done pretty well on these though, all things considered. You know, aside from my Xbox breaking. That was bad. Now if only there would be a decent deal on the 250GB Xbox that doesn't come with Kinect. Seriously, all the deals are either for the 4 GB model (and I've barely gotten by with 20 these last few years, I ain't downgrading) or the Kinect bundles. I don't want a freaking Kinect Microsoft! Those games come in purple boxes. PURPLE! Whose bright idea was that? As if transparent neon green wasn't bad enough.
Speaking of which, that brings me to my other point of discussion: Mass Effect 3. More specifically, the fact that the 360 version of Mass Effect 3 has Kinect support.
Now, I don't mind that BioWare (by which I really mean Microsoft pressuring EA, and then in turn pressuring BioWare (well, maybe, I don't really know)) added in Kinect stuff, especially since it's optional and in a way that makes sense (even if it's all just stuff that literally ANY MICROPHONE can do). What bothers me is that Kinect games come in purple boxes.
Is Mass Effect 3 going to come in a purple box?
I sure hope not. I don't know if I could bring myself to buy it then. Yeah, I know, it's a really dumb and meaningless thing to be upset about, but on the other hand, I have my pride. My manly pride. Purple is not manly. Purple is the color of royalty. Royalty is not manly, and it's not American.
So yeah, the color purple is not American. You know that song "Purple Haze?" Well, Hendrix was writing about the evils of monarchies. You can look that up, it's totally true.*
And don't say, "Oh, well just buy the collector's edition." There's three potential problems with that. One: It may just have the regular case in it. Two: I'm too cheap for that. Three: I read online that it'll have lady Shepard on it too, and I'm too sexist for that. That, and I feel like BioWare has wimped out by not sticking with the same thing they've used in all the marketing for the previous games. The hell with the people who used lady Shepard or changed the look of man Shepard. They went to the trouble of modeling it after a real dude. Stop disrespecting that Dutch model or whatever the hell he does for a living.
Okay, so that last reason is pretty silly, and I'm not really sexist (well, maybe a little). But I seriously wouldn't want to buy a game in a purple box. I'd seriously consider borrowing my friend's PS3 copy of ME2 and playing that (and paying $10 for that comic thing) so I can have all the decisions for Mass Effect 3. And I could save a couple hundo dollars by not buying a new 360. Of course then I'd miss out on Gears 3...Decisions, decisions...
Anyway, does anyone have thoughts? Anyone else afraid that ME3 will be in a purple box? Do you internet people not care? Damn hippies, women, and hippie women. You ruined America! And this one I stand by.
*Not true at all.