WTF Videogames!?

In this blog I’m going to write about gaming. Unfortunately, there is no real reason behind it; I’m just another dude at work writing about something to pass the time. Well, here goes…

Gaming did not begin; it evolved.

It evolved very gradually from the interaction between people and low-tech videogames that were electronic exemplifications of humankind’s pastimes; board-games, sports, puzzles, exploration, etc.

Bah, fuck that. Everybody knows that. Let’s talk about something else…

Okay, so today while I was writing this boring ass report I was thinking about a game that I’ve been playing recently called Demon’s Souls. In this game, you go around collecting rocks to forge new weapons (ha, you thought I was going to say something a little more obvious?).

Anyway, you kill clowns and lava beetles to collect rocks to make your weapons and shields better.

Great game.

At the time I was thinking that, my boss came in and asked how the report was going. I answered his question and he left my office. As I returned to my computer screen, I noticed that I couldn’t locate where I was typing this blog (I copy and paste these bullshit blogs into the real reports so that it looks like I’m typing something significant and it’s more difficult to get caught).

That’s when it hit me – a small shock to my brain. My vision blurred as I experienced somewhat of an astral projection of the history of humankind.

Fuck. It was fucking crazy.

I went back in time, and I was flying in the sky over the lush savannas of a primitive earth.

Hot, blonde cave-women were riding on saber-tooth cats.

Strong, hairy men were eating haunches of meat and laughing as they danced around a fire.

Raptors grew wings and leapt over a cliff only to find themselves flying by my side.

It was badass.

Then, I spotted some cave-people pulling rocks out of the ground. They were holding the rocks up toward me, as if trying to tell me something! It was then, at that very moment that I realized that gaming is possible because people take rocks out of the ground, do experiments on them in a lab, and make all of the hardware components necessary for computing data!

Then, the raptor beside me turned and looked at me and raised his foot like a “heavy-metal” sign.