How I Made My Fun with 10 Cars: Grand Theft Auto Online

So I played way, way, way too much Grand Theft Auto Online. I would say it's okay for the most part. It still has a lot of problems (and even some new ones) that plague the series. Like most things, it's probably more fun with friends or other likeminded folk. But for me as a guy running solo with no crew affiliations, I had to make my own fun with this game. And the most fun I had was collecting cars and slapping bulletproof tires and turbo charging the shit out of them.

How I Made My Fun with 10 Cars

The missions are pretty lukewarm and incredibly hard, often asking you to pull off ridiculous shit with little to no payoff so I guess it's no surprise no one wants to play them. Races have devolved to Criminal Records and Down the Drain with Super cars and absolutely nothing else. There seems to be only one Survival map that happens to be Scrapyard. And I think I've only seen one session where one other guy actually wanted to play Skydiving. Oh, and I played one game of Tennis that didn't increase my strength stat like in the single player.

However, collecting cool vehicles kept me coming back for some reason. Making my own personal list of hot cars and cool vehicles was really appealing, so I figured I would share my madness.

Collecting Cars and the Import/Export Garage Love Story

One of my favorite things from the Grand Theft Auto series was the Import/Export garage. I found a lot of fun in tracking down cars from a list and delivering them to a dock or hangar. It gave me a reason to pay attention to the road and get out of my vehicle to make a daring theft or harass some unlucky motorist. I was really disappointed when this was nowhere to be found in the single player of GTAV. However, they sort of brought it back for the Online with Simeon and his car theft list. The other 99.9 percent of players don't seem to share my love, so it's one of the few things I can do without constant interruption/murder.

The major catch about this would be that the vehicle list is super limited and seems to be the same two groups of cars every single time. I must have stolen a million Mammoth Patriots and Schyster Fusilades. It's a damn shame they can't make it interesting and ask for like a Cop Car or a BF Injection or something. There must be hundreds of vehicles in this game and they only pull from a list of ten. I suppose maybe they were thinking ahead and realized how terrible their vehicle spawns are in online. Where the entire world only uses four of five cars to fill the road, sometimes making Simeon's car list damn near impossible to fulfill.

Who wants a Benefactor Dubsta? Text me if you're interested! Great prices!
Who wants a Benefactor Dubsta? Text me if you're interested! Great prices!

So that's when I decided to make my own car list. I stopped caring about the guns. I didn't care about the shootouts. I forgot the bounties and gaudy Super cars everyone seems to be in love with. I bought a ten car garage and set out to fill it with the stuff I cared about. I recently bought my tenth car, and I'm feeling like I've actually gotten something done in GTA Online.

Sarumarine's Showroom: My 10 Cars

Every car has a story. Especially in this game when people seem to want to kill you just 'cause it's something to do. Sometimes getting one of these personal beauties was a real pain in the ass. But it's worth it. And every single one of them has bulletproof tires so you can't stop me when I'm crusin'. That's what Sticky Bombs are for.

Bravado Duneloader

I love this rickety-ass truck
I love this rickety-ass truck

The Bravado Duneloader (without junk in the back) is without a doubt, the hardest fucking vehicle to find out of the whole list. It was especially infuriating when these would spawn in a mission where I couldn't take it to my garage. But I love the way this thing looks. I gave it a silver paint job, a turbo engine, and bulletproof tires so I can roll all over the Grand Senora Desert even someone takes shots at me.

Ubermacht Oracle

My fake government vehicle has the best black paint job ever
My fake government vehicle has the best black paint job ever

I really wanted an FIB Buffalo or Unmarked Cruiser because I've always admired the pure black government agency vehicles in Grand Theft Auto- but since you can't store Emergency vehicles in your garage, I decided to make a fake one. It also has four doors, which was helpful in a handful of missions when there was three other people to climb in. I tinted the windows black so I can always feel like I'm up to no good. It's also low-key at the same time, so when I park it at the heliport no one messes with it.

BF Injection

Best vehicle in Grand Theft Auto V. Sarumarine approved!
Best vehicle in Grand Theft Auto V. Sarumarine approved!

This is my all-time favorite vehicle in Grand Theft Auto V. The BF Injection is so damn cool- that's why it was an amazing pain to find up near Sandy Shores. The game was being a real asshole by spawning nothing but Benefactor Dubstas for actual days when I really wanted a damn dune buggy. This black-and-copper Injection was my personal vehicle for the majority of my time online. Love it to death. I've rode through hell and high water in this thing and nothing but respect for it. Now if only more people would run Off-Road races so I can unlock more upgrades for it...

Bravado Gauntlet

Everyone needs a white car
Everyone needs a white car

I didn't drive this much, but I love the look at it. I didn't even have to mess with the white and red paint job. I took it right off the street and it was good to go with no problem at all. I gave it bulletproof tires just incase but never got around to turbo charging it.

Declasse Sabre Turbo

For all your muscle car needs
For all your muscle car needs

I spent most of my time with this muscle car. I've always loved the Sabre Turbo. I could recognize the back end of this car anywhere. I mean... you know. Luckily finding a Sabre Turbo is like trying to find dirt. It's literally EVERYWHERE and spawns in the tens of thousands. If you can't find a Sabre Turbo, I don't know if I believe you.

Canis Mesa Off-road

I only had to kill two players and four mercenaries (I hired) to get it
I only had to kill two players and four mercenaries (I hired) to get it

The Canis Mesa Off-road, or the Merryweather Jeep, was the vehicle I had to spill the most blood to get. First I had to pay 7500 dollars to get four mercenaries to attack a random player so it would spawn on the map. Then I had to kill the player I attacked with Merryweather when they tried to get in the jeep. And even when I managed to get away, I ran into another player heading back to my garage where they killed me and stole it. I thought it was gone for sure, but I shot out two tires and the guy who took it from me lost interest. I then drove it back to my garage riding rims praying and hoping no one else would try to kill me before I could get a tracker and insure it.

But man, what a beauty. Totally worth it. I gave it the color I use for races. Creek Brown.

BF Surfer

Now I can hang ten at five miles an hour!
Now I can hang ten at five miles an hour!

I really love the way the BF Surfer van is based off the VW Bus. Unfortunately, that's about all I like about it. This thing moves at 5 miles an hour and is a really big target in the trigger happy world of GTA Online. It's not hard to find a rusty beater version of this van, but I lucked out and found a pristine clean version on a coast near a lighthouse in the east. When I was driving it back, I managed to get a 1000 dollar bounty on me which made the slow ride back tense as hell. Lucky for me, no one felt like going out of their way to collect on me.

Declasse Tornado

*Plays garage theme from Saints Row the Third*
*Plays garage theme from Saints Row the Third*

I really wanted a purple car for some reason so I made it a Declasse Tornado. Of course as soon as I realized that, all the Tornado spawns dried up and I had to really look for this car instead of stumbling over it. That's pretty much GTA Online's car spawn in a nutshell. Feast or famine. Either way, this is probably my favorite showcase vehicle. Bonus points for being a convertible. It's slow, even after a turbo charge, but it sure looks great! White tires are the best.

Pagassi Vacca

Hey! A super car! I can almost picture Criminal Records and Down the Drain already!
Hey! A super car! I can almost picture Criminal Records and Down the Drain already!

As much as I've grown to hate Super cars from the stale Races in GTAO, I figured I would at least buy one. I like the Vacca mostly for how it handles rather than how it looks. After I bought it, I took it out to buy bulletproof tires and was almost immediately killed by a guy near my apartment. He really, really wanted to destroy this thing for some reason. Luckily, even with a busted tire, I managed to escape and get to a mod shop. I guess I can understand that guy's distain for Super cars. Unfortunately, this one is mine.

Bravado Banshee

Best friends forever!
Best friends forever!

The tenth and final vehicle makes me feel like I've come full circle with the Grand Theft Auto series. Probably my favorite car from Grand Theft Auto III (the first game in the series I played) was the Banshee. You could find it on the first island and then whenever you felt like it on the second island. I didn't know you could even buy it for the longest time considering it's so far down the list on Legendary Motorsports page. But now that I have one in a cool green paint scheme, I don't know what else I can do with GTA Online.

I wish they would have let you put more types of vehicles in your garage like the FIB Granger or the Romero Hearse. I've always loved stealing the unique or gimmick vehicles like in Vice City and San Andreas. But for now, I think I've gotten everything I've wanted.

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