Something went wrong. Try again later

Shaunage

This user has not updated recently.

948 152 53 34
Forum Posts Wiki Points Following Followers

Lies, and the Lying Dyack Who Told Them

"I think you'll all be pleasantly surprised." "Actually we've only been working on Too Human for FOUR years." "An integral moral choice: become more powerful at the cost of your humanity - how far will you go?"

Denis Dyack is a liar. He has made a good game (not this one, obviously), but he is a bad person.

Too Human is one of those crazy new games that realises people hate losing progress in games to unfair deaths and just

Denis 'remember Eternal Darkness?' Dyack
Denis 'remember Eternal Darkness?' Dyack
respawns you with no penalty every time you are killed. I say "every time you are killed instead of "every time you die" because in a game, 'dying' implies that it is your fault. Unfortunately, Too Human also realises that you are technically completely invincible and that as such it can feel free to kill you unfairly over and over and over again. There is a "100 deaths" achievement in the game. It was thrust upon me about 3/4 of the way through the game. Would anyone like to guess how many times I died in, for example, Fable? None. Not once. Scarily close against that scorpion, but I got away with it.

It seems I chose completely the wrong class. I hope I did, or the game has no place being on shelves with "$99.99" written on it. I chose the dual wielding melee character, assuming from the demo that the entire game is just up close cutting dudes action. Most of the game is, but every now and then you will be assaulted by a horde of suicide bomber enemies, who explode upon contact with your weapon, immediately doing approximately half a life bar worth of damage. I said 'horde' and I meant it. They run at you in large groups, meaning you take a swing, hit two of them and are killed instantly. You wait out the 20 second odd valkyrie revival for the 80th time, run back into the room you were in and are again killed immediately because there are THIRTY OF THEM LEFT. Maybe the long range weapons class is able to take these guys out, but my berserker's weapons, regardless of the number next to them in the stats screen, invariably did less than 10 damage per shot, while my melee attack might do 900 or more. In practice, this means that the horde is upon you before you can kill even one of them, so you may as well just start swinging and take the 5 deaths.

This apparently awful character class decision filtered through to the boss fights as well. Up close, it is pretty well impossible to hit the specific body part you need to damage at that moment with your swords and you die in one or two hits. The effect of this is that the only realistic way to kill the bosses is by standing back and using your BB gun on them until they die. This method will usually take somewhere in the vicinity of AN HOUR to kill this single enemy. That is not an inflated number. I actually mean a full hour. Sixty minutes.

The cutscenes are the best part of the game. They'd just about have to be, with what I've written above. They are well written and look preeeeetty good. Unfortunately, this game is "the first installment of a thrilling trilogy," so the story never gets as good as it is going to have to if the third game is ever going to be released (good luck with that). I'll make the obvious Lord of the Rings trilogy comparison, but Too Human doesn't get quite as far as "I'm glad you're with me." The credits roll at about the "It's wonderful to see you, Gandalf" stage.

Oh, and it features Havok.

Another review tonight. I've actually been playing games.
1 Comments