I obviously can't explain why every person was turned off by all of this, I personally find it smells of people trying to push agendas that really have nothing to do with atheism and skepticism. The petty bickering between the "sides" has certainly limited my involvement in the online atheist community.
Are you suggesting that the atheist community as a whole has been unfriendly or unwelcoming to women?
I don't think the atheist community as a whole is anti-woman, but there is at least a subset that do seem to be that way. That Amazing Atheist video posted earlier is pretty damning, not because the hosts of "The View" aren't obnoxious people and deserving of criticism, but because of how he was punctuating the entire video with angrily shouted exclamations of how these women are "cunts". I don't know how much of that is just him, or if he's just playing to his fanbase but either way it's not great. Those thunderf00t videos don't inspire much confidence either.
Would you say that an even larger issue than those women making fun of a man who had his penis cut off is that they were called cunts afterward? Do you believe that an all male group of hosts would have gotten away with making fun of a woman who had her genitals mutilated? Would they have walked away from the situation with their jobs intact? Would laughing through an apology have been acceptable? Would you have been more outraged if it were males making fun of a female victim?
And as someone who always tries to see the point of view from both sides of an issue, I'm quite happy that my comments on "elevator gate" resulted in people on both sides of the issue attacking my last post. Awesome.