Eventually we'll move forward, and the pain will start to dull. Right now though, I don't know. It still really fucking hurts. I spent much of yesterday crying, following the tributes that came out, trying to make little gestures of my own to honor the man, and trying to put into writing how it could be that my heart is so thoroughly broken over the loss of a friend I never once met or spoke to. Upon waking up today most of the sadness and anger had been replaced with numbness, but upon visiting the site it all keeps coming back up. I'm squinting at the monitor as I try to write this.