My realization.

I knew something was up when yesterday morning I read this tweet. I thought:

"Is Alex leaving Giant Bomb?"

"Is the site shutting down or moving AGAIN?!"

"Something isn't right..."

So, I kept an eye on Twitter a little more than usual, waiting to hear what I knew in my gut was some bad news. I had no idea just how bad the news was... After I finished cleaning my kitchen, I pulled my phone out of my pocket to see if the aforementioned ambiguous Tweet was clarified, and when I saw that Ryan has passed away, I was, as most of you were, completely floored. I plopped down on the couch, Comedy Bang-Bang still playing in my headphones, and thought, "This is a joke, right?" But then I thought back to Alex's Tweet earlier, and I knew it wasn't. I realized that I (see: We) had all lost a friend.

That statement is odd to me: "lost a friend". I, like most of you, never was able to meet Ryan in person. It's been a strange thing for me to grasp that I would not only consider a person that I have never met a friend, but that I would consider him a GOOD friend. It was when I was talking to my wife about this that I really realized, that for nearly a decade, I have known Ryan, Jeff, Vinny, Brad, and other former Gamespot alum. I have read an article or review, watched a video, or heard on a podcast all these guys almost every day of my life for years. I respect each one of these people greatly, and feel very close with them, even though we've never met.

Up until yesterday, I don't think that I would've ever refered to any of them as my "friends". But after I sat on my couch, without moving, reading Twitter and the various blogs that were being posted eulogizing Ryan for almost two hours, it hit me. Ryan was a friend.

So, in a strange way, I don't feel like yesterday I "lost a friend" so much as I gained many more. I am endlessly grateful to all the Giant Bomb staff for the site, the hours and hours of content each week, and for the friendship.

Much love, GLHB, China Don't Care, oh, and of course, Fuck Ryan Davis:


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