@devil240z: well, you know, this isn't even your fault. anger issue aside. might sound childish but i'm just stating fact. someone takes something that's yours, doesnt give it back, you take something that's theirs, then you're being the good guy giving it back but she doesn't. Even though in this situation we're talking about a lighter, u can replace the lighter with literally anything. I've had my share of anger issues in the past (it got really bad as well for me, so trust me, i'm not just talking out of my ass) but as i've grown older i'm getting calmer, wiser and I try to channel my rage into something else. It's been working last 5 years i'd say, more or less.
My point is, it's good to recognize your flaws and it's great to want to become better, but be careful of the reverse effect,
where you start becoming a pushover just because other people use your anger issues against you for any reason whatsoever. Not giving your lighter back after you gave back hers is sending out a message. Seems to me like she intentionally tried to trigger your rage and then pointing the blame towards you. think about that. I may sound like i'm trying to make this worse for you, but on the contrary. Maybe she should look at her own flaws. Why is SHE acting LIKE THAT?
That being said. Just depends what you're willing to put up with. Maybe i'm dramatizing, this is the internets, but i figured i might be onto something. If you want to make it right, just apologize, do everything you can to make it better and she'll turn around. But think about why she behaves and does the things she does. Stay True To Yourself.
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