By TurboMan 25 Comments
You be the judge! In my opinion, it sounds like Ray Liotta to me.
You be the judge! In my opinion, it sounds like Ray Liotta to me.
Here's a short review of my thoughts about Vengeance 2011:
Overall, I would say that I was pleasantly surprised overall by Vengeance. Going into the show, the card looked pretty bad and I would've been upset if I payed for a ticket to see it live. Every match just didn't seem like it meant anything in the long run, and the entire night was easily predictable (I only got two outcomes wrong)... but everybody involved went out there and put on a good show.
Match of The Night: John Cena vs. Alberto Del Rio
Anyone else catch Vengeance? What did you think?
EDIT: Here's a little video I made, enjoy!
Another fun little stat: Vinny is in almost every quick look featured in this one.
If you're on reddit, be sure to upvote:
Bound for Glory is being built as "TNA's WrestleMania", and for the most part it showed last Sunday. There were a number of matches that were high quality matches. I consider myself a casual fan at best of TNA's work, and I was actually excited at some of the situations going into the PPV. Overall, I would say that the opening half of the PPV was phenomenal, and everybody that was involved looked as good as they are going to look. Unfortunately the wheels fell off the track by the end of the PPV, and it erased all of the good will that the first half did for the product.
Austin Aries (c) vs. Brian Kendrick - Grade: (B+)
Holy hell, how is the X-Division championship still be defending at the beginning of every TNA PPV? Austin Aries continues to be the top guy performing at every TNA show for the past couple of months. He is phenomenal at what he does in the ring, every movement has it's purpose and he has a very natural way of getting the entire crowd behind the match. If I was TNA, I would put everything into Aries. Kendrick continues to not impress me all that much, but him and Aries work fine together. Aries selling the top-rope Sliced Bread #2 was a fantastic moment. Easiest thing to compare it to was The Rock's selling of the Stone Cold Stunner at WrestleMania. Hopefully the X-Division continues to expand past these two guys soon.
RVD vs. Jerry Lynn - Grade: (B)
The easy first reaction to this match is "oh great, another RVD vs. Jerry Lynn match, these were great in 1998". While you are right that we've seen these two fight so many times, you'd forget that these guys always put on a great match. A good hardcore match between the two, even though I have no clue what's next for either person. Van Terminator is always something that will impress me.
Crimson vs. Samoa Joe vs. Mat Morgan - Grade: (C+)
This match was more entertaining than it had any right to be. Samoa Joe vs. Crimson feud might be interesting... even though everyone knows that Joe should be a main eventer by now.
Mr. Anderson vs. Bully Ray - Grade: (B-)
Once again, another match that we've seen about ten times by now. This one went throughout the arena and had a couple of good spots (piledriver on concrete floor). Very reminiscent of old ECW matches.
A Women's Match happened. This might have been the sloppiest match I've witnessed this year... I'd rather not relive it right now.
AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels - Grade: (C)
Oh hey, another AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels match (you might be seeing a pattern with my thoughts on these matches). The match was fine up to the finish, where Styles was walking towards Daniels with a SCREWDRIVER and Daniels just quit before he was murdered. Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb.
Hulk Hogan vs. Sting - Grade: (F)
I really have no clue where to start with this one. The only moves during the match was punches, Hogan fell down on his back twice, he took a stinger splash and then tapped out to the scorpion death lock. It's a slap in the face to all the younger workers that this match was even allowed to happen, and it helped nobody look better. Hogan's not going to take TNA to the next level, and nobody in the upper management seems to be able to get over that fact... Hogan turned face after the match FOR NO FUCKING REASON WHATSOEVER... I'll talk more about this in the next section.
Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode - Grade: (C+)
Time was running out on TNA's PPV time, so they skipped proper introductions for a TNA Championship match, and tried to rush a match into the last 15 minutes of the hour. GEE, IF ONLY YOU HADN'T OF WASTED TIME WITH THE HOGAN/STING MATCH OR THE WOMEN'S SLOPFEST, MAYBE YOU WOULD'VE HAD TIME IN YOUR MAIN EVENT TO PULL OFF A MAIN EVENT WORTHY MATCH. Most of the match was fine, and there was a ton of submission moves that threatened to end the match. Angle ended up winning by cheating, which is a great big "fuck you" to every TNA fan. You have a young wrestler who might set the standard for the future of TNA, and you continue to let some ex-WWE guy hold onto the belt. You didn't even let him win by pinfall, it was a bullshit ending ON YOU BIGGEST PPV!
Congrats TNA, on your biggest PPV of the year you managed to turn so many people away from your product... maybe you should figure out that this is why you only hold events in half-filled arenas:
So according to multiple wrestling websites, the original plan was to have Bobby Roode win the TNA Championship from Angle, and let Angle take time off away from professional wrestling. This changed when Hogan was offered a contract extension (for two years!) and lobbied in the back for Angle to retain over Bobby Roode. I have read two different things on why this happened:
Days before Bound for Glory, Hogan said that Roode shouldn't be a champion, and he thinks that TNA should promote the living hell out of Jeff Hardy, cause Hogan thinks that he is the future. Now, personally, I think it's very obvious that Hardy should never be anywhere near the championship ever again since he embarrassed the company earlier this year by showing up to the main event pilled out of his mind:
Roode has been with TNA for over ten years, and he's talented enough to hold the TNA Championship. Forcing Roode to lose his match has just about pissed off the entire TNA roster, since there's been disappointment towards Hogan all day on twitter. It's just like WCW all over again. Fuck Hulk Hogan.
I made this for the freelance screened job... also, Where's the wrestling wiki site?
You have been sent by whomever the overlords of your intergalactic planet are with one goal, which is to try and take over any and all planets that are left in the universe. The spaceship has set its coordinates to "Earth", an inferior planet filled with weak humanoids. The spaceship crash-lands in an empty forest outside of Oklahoma City, and you stumble through the barren wasteland, looking for civilization on this planet called "Earth". There is a giant building with cars outside, and inside the building you find two men in the middle of a professional wrestling ring trying to decide who is the better man. It dawns on you that in order to take over this planet, you must first prove your dominance against the best athletes that this world has to offer... Professional Wrestlers.
Wrestling characters (otherwise known as gimmicks) makes or breaks the success of the actual wrestler that's working the character. Since this website is taking a look at everything extraterrestrial related in movie history, I feel that we need to take a brief look at what has happened inside the weird and whacky world of professional wrestling. The interesting thing about all of the workers featured in this post is that all of them found success in the wrestling business even though that they paired themselves with the worst idea you could ever come up with, a professional wrestler from space.
Jim Cornette, one of the greatest wrestling managers of all time, had a rough start in the business. During the late 1980's, Cornette bounced around the NWA locker room managing as many clients as possible. There were some shows where he was hired and fired on the same night by different wrestlers because he could never find a client that would benefit from his managerial skills.
Well, it appears that Jimmy Cornette was able to do some space and time exploration so he could find the tag team known as "The Galaxians". This team consisted of Alpha and Beta, claiming to be from the "Outer Galaxies" or "The Twilight Zone", these two clowns never won a match inside of the wrestling ring.
Even though this team was a disaster, Cornette has stated in his book that managing this team helped him gain the experience and confidence he needed to manage The Midnight Express. And more shockingly, one of The Galaxians (Danny Davis) eventually was the owner of Ohio Valley Wrestling, which used to be the development territory for the WWE.
Back in 1986, the hot new toy for the children is undoubtedly Lazer-Tag. To capitalize and make a marketable character, the NWA gave birth to a man known as Lazor-Tron. The man who is under the mask is none other than a member of the legendary Guerrero family, Hector Guerrero. I'm sure at this time, Hector was glad that this would be the last dumb gimmick he would have to work under before he hit the big time as himself. If only he knew that in under a decade, he would be in a turkey suit dancing with Mene Gene Okerlund...
Let us focus on Lazor-Tron for now. His outfit was certainly out of this world. He wore a white space outfit, featuring futuristic shoulder pads and antennas on the top of his mask. In the middle of Lazor-Trons suit was an official sensor for the Lazer-Tag game. It was a reminder that even though Lazor-Tron looked peaceful and friendly, he could pull out his Lazer-Tag gun at any moment and smoke your ass with invisible Lazer bullets. Believe it or not, Hector Guerrero was the NWA Junior Heavyweight Champion for some time under the gimmick of Lazor-Tron.
If you are fond of the nWo era in WCW, you might be able to recognize this name: Konnan. Konnan is a fine wrestler who is a mega star in his home nation of Mexico, and has worked for many companies in America. When WWE gave Konnan a contract in 1992, he came up with a character by the name of Max Moon. Max Moon came down to the ring in one of the most ridiculous costumes ever made in the history of wrestling. Not only was the wrestling gear a mess, but he also came to the ring during his entrance in a jetpack, and had fireworks and streamers shooting out of his hands. I am honestly surprised that Capcom didn't try to get involved, since Max Moon looked strikingly similar to Mega Man during his entrances.
Max Moon has both been announced as from "Outer Space" and from "The Future". When he got in the ring, he's known to start out his matches by doing a couple of rolls on the ground, which must be some sort of way to psych out your opponents on the moon.
The real kicker is that Konnan only wrestled three matches in the WWE before leaving. Since Konnan left, WWE actually passed on the Max Moon gimmick to Paul Diamond before killing Max Moon off in 1993.
The main question with adding The Ultimate Warrior to this list is whether or not he qualifies as being from outer space. Warrior has always been billed from "Parts Unknown", so he really could be from anywhere. But I dare you to watch some of his promos and tell me that this man is from our solar system. Even in the video, Warrior is talking about loading up the spaceship with rocket fuel and how he landed here in some sort of capsule:
We all know of the success that The Ultimate Warrior has gained throughout the handful of years that he was one of the main stars inside of the WWE. Not only is The Ultimate Warrior from out of this world, but I'd say that the man from behind the mask is also completely insane. Born under the name of James Hellwig, he changed his name to Warrior in 1993. I didn't forget to add a last name to that, he just goes by the name of Warrior now.
The Ultimate Warrior is the prime example of an extraterrestrial creature. He was a freak, and had no social qualities with anyone else on this planet. He looked and moved differently than anyone else we've ever seen in the wrestling ring. Hell, he even had supernatural powers from time to time. It is awfully dumb, but he somehow managed to be one of the most memorable wrestlers of all time.
So, if you're not sure why I'm doing this, here's a brief explanation. Vince Russo has been relinquished of his head writing duties in TNA this week, so I think it would be a bit of fun to travel down memory lane and examine some of the worst things that Vince Russo has done in his professional wrestling career... at the end of the week, I'll compile all of these blogs together as one big "Wanna Wrestle?" blog...
also, make a damn wrestling site, Jeff Gerstmann.
#5. Viagra on a pole match
One thing that Vince Russo may always be remembered for is booking good quality matches with awful, pointless stipulations. For instance, there's a match involving four mexican wrestlers trying to prove themselves in the big time American wrestling leagues. So what match should they be involved it? Why yes, of course, a pinata on a pole match, and inside the pinata is $10,000. These matches were extremely frequent in the Vince Russo era of WCW, but the most offensive angle he's ever made was booking the "Viagra On A Pole" match.
See that man up there? He is "The Franchise" Shane Douglas, and this one of the most important segments in the history of wrestling. It's the birth of ECW in 1994. It's a shame that later in life, Douglas has made many enemies in the wrestling industry and seems to be a colossal prick, but he is a well accomplished wrestler that never quite made it in the big time. Here's how he was treated in WCW:
I guess sex tapes were a big thing in 1999/2000 for some reason (can't think of a celebrity sex tape from those years). But whatever the case may be, there was a love triangle between Billy Kidman, Shane Douglas, and the seemingly slutty Torrie Wilson. Billy Kidman and Torrie Wilson had a sex tape at first, and it was hot if you're into staring at a bed cover for two minutes. Shane Douglas tried to one-up Billy Kidman by making his own sex tape with Torrie Wilson, but it ended up not working because Shane Douglas couldn't get an erection.
Are you finding this hilarious yet? How about a Viagra on a pole match? And the bottle has a giant label with "VIAGRA" on the cover. What if the commentary kept making sexual innuendos? GET IT, VIAGRA on a POLE? Why are you not laughing?
The match itself wasn't awful, but it was a great way to tarnish the career of Shane Douglas and make Billy Kidman further away of getting that push he deserved in WCW.
Oh, you think I was going to stop? It's time for some Wrasslin' Discussion. This would be a much more appropriate place to talk about the sport of professional wrestling if there was a dedicated wrestling website... ya know... one with a wiki and forums and features... maybe one day we'll get that. But for now, we unite here.
Well, it's been a whole two weeks since the last WWE PPV. That's just two episodes of Raw, and two episodes of Smackdown. The card only has five matches on it, but I'm sure there will be some kind of six man tag shoved in there somewhere. I'm interested in both the main events tonight, and the possible disaster of the Sin Cara vs. Sin Cara match. Here we go!
During Christian's entrance, R-Truth and Miz where spotted in the front row with tickets, but John Laurenaitus and security came out to kick R-Truth and Miz out of the building. I call bullshit, when John Cena was fired last year, he bought tickets for ringside seats, but nobody did anything about it! Boo continuity.
I think that it's crazy to have this match being the opening bout of the night. Maybe there isn't going to be an unpromoted match tonight. Anyways, this was a good opening match. Nothing too fancy or memorable, and there was some stiff shots between them, so it was above the quality of a normal TV match for the WWE. I don't really agree with Sheamus winning the match, but I guess he makes sense if he's going to be the next challenger to Mark Henry (if Henry wins tonight). I hope WWE keeps letting Christian do his "One More Match" gimmick. Overall good match.
This is a guilty pleasure match for me personally, since it was the first thing that popped into my head when I read that Sin Cara was being replaced with another mexican wrestler while the original Sin Cara was suspended from the WWE for violating their wellness policy. The match started with a fair amount of potential, good lucha style wrestling. Unfortunately, the match became a bit stale and there was some "Boring" chants from the crowd (honestly, these chants were undeserved, but whatever). There was also a horrible botch with a moonsault to the outside where original Sin Cara missed his mark. Good Sin Cara wins, and is 1-0 against... EVIL SIN CARA!
Oh, look at this unpromoted match! I really like Air Boom as champions, and I don't think they need to let go of the belts until The Miz and R-Truth find their way back into the title picture somehow. Great match between everyone here. Dolph continues to be one of my favorite workers in the WWE and Evan Bourne continues to shine in these tag team matches. Sucks that it never was promoted, cause I think the match would have been much more interesting if it seemed that Dolph and Jack had a chance at winning.
This match was the dark horse of the entire PPV. Both Henry and Ortan are less-than-great wrestlers, but Henry has a great thing going and hopefully he will continue his "Hall of Pain". Overall, the match was a good paced brawl. The powerslam on the floor outside was a good spot. Randy Ortan pissed me off throughout the match for not selling his ribs and back being injured after all the slams and bear hugs that Henry was doing throughout the match. Good for them to include Mark Henry kicking out of the RKO, and winning the match in the end. After the match, Henry tried to add Ortan to the Hall of Pain, but Ortan got out of it and started fighting back. Sigh... this feud will continue.
Cody Rhodes come out and puts on a great promo about how ugly the Intercontinental title is, so he throws it away and brings back the white IC title. After that, for no reason what-so-ever John Laurenaitus comes back out (is HHH even here tonight) and forces Rhodes to defend it agains JoMo right now. WHY!? This match made no sense, even though it was cool to see Rhodes put on a half-way decent match while wearing a suit. Also, why JoMo? He hasn't won a match in two months, he doesn't deserve a shot at a belt. Bad booking all around after the promo.
The beast has been defeated.
I really enjoyed this match thoroughly. Great use of the cage, Punk really lunged himself into it a good number of times. The best part about this match was the psychology. Most of the spots were a results of a game of hide and seek, two wrestlers are going at it and the third emerges out of nowhere. It was kind of sad to see that the crowd seems to not give a fuck about ADR, the Cena/Punk chants were loud throughout the match, and took away from ADR really getting any kind of heat on him. The moment ADR locked Cena out of the cage is the highlight of the match. ADR got the dirty win off of CM Punk, I wish it was a bit cleaner (not all the heels in the WWE needs to be cheaters), but I'm glad they gave the title to the person that needed it most.
Miz and R-Truth ambushed everybody and locked themselves in. Seeing everybody in the locker room go after these two was a great way to end the PPV, and I'm excited to see where everything goes next.
Overall PPV Grade: B-
Great main event, and all of the right decisions were made as far as winners, but there was too many matches that was not promoted. As far as the rest of the matches go, not many of the matches stood out. I say that if you can find a way to watch the main event, go for it, otherwise it's fine if you skip this one.
We've made progress!
So uh... that was weird.
Last week, Mark Henry attacked Jim Ross during an interview, which is a shock to no one because the only times JR gives an interview to someone he's had his arm broken and he's been set on fire (didn't make that up). Anyways, this time Jerry Lawler decided to step in and save his good buddy from being choked to death by Mark Henry. While doing so, Lawler got the shit kicked out of him and took a slam through the announce table, becoming legitimately injured for a couple of weeks.
Fast-Foward to this week. During a short segment talking about what happened, Cole comes out of nowhere and decides to announce that "The King" is suffering from Anal Bleeding. Booker T gets caught in an awkward situation and doesn't know how to re-act, and JR looks disgusted at Cole for announcing it on public TV. I can only imagine that it was something that Vince McMahon told Michael Cole to say through the headset, but it came out of nowhere and ended up being semi-hilarious. The fact that the phrase "Anal Bleeding" trended on Twitter last night made it worth it though.
Here's a fun video I made today and I would like you to watch it and like it and comment it:
It's another fun trope that CM Punk does, every time he's working the announcers table and Cena uses the table, Punk always complains about his Diet Soda being spilled. It was great to see him come out last night in his $10 announcers jacket and reclaim his seat during a Cena match. If Punk wasn't such a good headlining wrestler for the WWE, I would love it if he would replace Lawler/Cole as the heel announcer.
Anyways, Hell In A Cell is this sunday, and we once again have a WWE PPV where there are only four booked matches heading into the weekend. They pulled that kind of shit with Summer Slam, and I hope that they have learned from it since the buy rates went down by 50,000 viewers. But here's a quick prediction list of who I think should be winning each match.
John Cena (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk - Hell In A Cell Match
Who Should Win: Alberto Del Rio
Who Will Win: John Cena
Mark Henry (c) vs. Randy Ortan - Hell In A Cell Match
Who Should Win: Mark Henry
Who Will Win: Mark Henry
Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly (c) - Divas Championship
Who Should Win: Beth Phoenix
Who Will Win: Kelly Kelly
Christian vs. Sheamus
Who Should Win: Christian (Because he needs to have... One More Match)
Who Will Win: Sheamus
Holy Shit folks, we still haven't gotten a Wrestling website for Whiskey Media? Then I guess I'll keep posting these on every site till we get one.
Holy shit, ROH delivers here.
Eddie Edwards vs. Roderick Stong - This match is easily a MOTY candidate (along with CM Punk/Cena and Edwards/Richards). "The Ringmaster's Challenge" is a brilliant match stipulation that I expect to see more of out of ROH. The conditions for a "Ringmaster's Challenge" match is 2/3 falls, first fall is pinfall only, second fall is submission only, and third fall (if necessary) is a 15 minutes iron man match. The match ended up lasting a little over 40 minutes long, and the entire match was back and forth, making both Strong and Edwards looking like legitimate contenders for Davey Richards title. Roderick hitting Edwards with nine backbreakers in the match looked painful as shit, but at the end of the day, Eddie Edwards got the win over Strong. (Match of the Year contender)
Ladder Wars 3. The Brisco Brothers vs. The All Night Express - Ladder Wars. LADDER WARS! LADDER FUCKING WARS! This match got bloody quick, and there were a number of solid bumps throughout the match. I would say that it was a shame that Edwards vs. Strong happened before this match, since it should have been the main event of the night (and a much better match than this one turned out to be). None the less, this was a good way to end the rivalry for these two tag teams, and I'm happy that All Night Express get their tag team title shot that they deserve.
El Generico vs. Jimmy Jacobs - Technically, this match never ended since Kevin Steen came out of nowhere after being fired two months ago (surprise), but for the fifteen minutes or so until Steen came out, this match was astoundingly good. All three (technically four if you count Steve Corino) of these men are all telling really good stories right now, and Kevin Steen could be the most interesting character in wrestling today. I fucking love that ROH is breaking the fourth wall to let Steen "fuck with the company". Throughout the week this week, the ROH Forums has been down because KEVIN STEEN HACKED INTO THE ROH FORUMS AND SHUT THEM THE FUCK DOWN. I mean, that's a great thread of story right there. I'm personally hoping that everyone involved in this match gets the bump into main event competition soon. The video below is Steen cutting a promo outside of the event Death Before Dishonor was held in.
No ROH Titles were defended - Davey Richards is in Japan right now. The TV title hasn't technically been won by Jay Lethal yet (he wins it next week on ROH's new TV show). The Tag Team Champions (Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin) both fought in worthless singles matches. There was no point to most of the matches, even though they were all just fine, there was no point in why people were wrestling. Hopefully this is fixed by the weekly TV show, but ROH needs to learn how to have more than 2 feuds at a time.
TNA continues to prove why they are the worst wrestling company on earth
Bobby Roode's Push - Bobby Roode is a wrestler that just looks like he should be a main eventer, and I'm glad to see that he finally might get that long term push that he's deserved for over a year now. He's been with the company for a good long time now, and he deserves a chance to headline a PPV. Winning the "Bound for Glory" series means that he'll get a shot against Kurt Angle. Now, the real question is do I think TNA will actually let its fantastic younger talent win the TNA Championship? The answer is doubtful unfortunately.
Austin Aries vs. Brian Kendrick - It seems that TNA has been making all of the wrong decisions recently with the TNA X Division. They're bringing in new wrestlers that are no good at all, they restricted the weight limit to the lighter guys (sorry Samoa Joe), and every X Division match is the opening match of every TNA event (when they are actually the best matches TNA has to offer). So seeing Aries win in a pretty good match at a PPV gives me a bit of faith for the future of the division. But it also pains me to know that TNA will never give Aries the chance to become a main eventer in that company.
The Entire Show - Bubba Ray had two matches in one night. TWO MATCHES? The main event was a snooze fest between Sting, Mr. Anderson, and Kurt Angle where the end of the match had Angle winning because of Hulk Hogan's interference. Samoa Joe actually put on a boring match. There was a horrible women's match. The tag team match was also really bland. A great handful of talent hasn't been on TNA for a while now, which should cause worries for the company. Overall, the entire PPV was the same quality of a weekly TV show.
A bit underwhelming overall, but a solid PPV.
Miz/R-Truth vs. Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne) - In an interview after Triple H became COO of the WWE, he said that he wanted to bring the Tag Team division back as one of the most important divisions in the company. It definitely shows, since Air Boom has been a great team to hold the titles for the past month. The Miz and R-Truth is right now the best storyline going on in the WWE, and it's great that they're becoming the center of Raw recently. Both of them are great at doing the "conspiracy against them" gimmick, and there's a couple of times in the match where they yell at the referee to count the pinfall, and in The Truth's eyes you believe that he really thinks that the ref is going to cost them the match on purpose. The match ended in DQ after The Miz hits a referee in pure frustration.
Mark Henry winning - I don't care if every PPV match that Henry has had wasn't all that good. I do care that Henry has been around WWE for a good 15 years, and that he has deserved this title for a long time. I mean, he did an angle where he impregnated an 80 year old woman who gave birth to a hand for Christ's sake. Henry having the title opens the door for all Smackdown talent to try and challenge him. My fingers are crossed that he holds on to it for a long time, and him and Daniels Bryans have a hell of a match at Wrestlemania.
The crowd during Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix - It's fun to see a crowd give a shit about a Diva's Match. Night of Champions was held in Buffalo, NY which is the hometown of Beth Phoenix. Throughout the match was chants of "Kelly Sucks" and Kelly Kelly was booed out of the arena after another bullshit roll-up pin won her the match. I don't know why she is still the champion, since EVERY MATCH is won with a roll-up pin. Ugh. UGH I SAY!
CM Punk vs. Triple H - This whole match isn't a disappointment. There are a handful of moments that a memorable from this match. CM Punk pulled off a "Shane-O-Mac" and gave Triple H an elbow drop through the Spanish Announce Table. Triple H gave a stiff chair shot to CM Punk's leg while it was wrapped around the ring post. This match unfortunately unfolded into a late WCW main event match, meaning there were about five or six interferences at the end and it made the ending bullshit no matter what.
Use your keyboard!
Log in to comment