I am a CHESS MASTER!!! CHALLENGE ME!!! YOU ARE DOOMED!!!


Chessmaster Challenge

( Well, this is certainly a weird blog, and trying to provide context will only make things stranger.) Some time ago, LordXavierBritish held a "contest": Photoshop Ryan Davis' face into a sunglasses-wearing pineapple for a free game on Steam. I entered with this (fun fact: I created that entirely with stabbing motions. With SpongeBob, that is the only way), and soon won my prize: a basic chess game with ranking and stuff. So what do I think of it? It's chess. It's fucking chess.
 
 Chessmaster Challenge assumes nothing except for your utter lack of mathematical skills.
Of course, it's chess with a lot of frills. For example: a profile system. For chess. It includes a bunch of incredibly stupid pictures and a typical character limit. As you can see, I chose the one character who looked normal in some way, since I don't want computers thinking me a mutated freak. That's how they know what to kill. Then again, I did show the computer that I was vulnerable by taking the tutorial. The long, long, long tutorial.  Let me give you an idea of how long it is: 29 parts, each one maybe 80-100 pages. Do I have to tell you how much they stretch this out? This game tells you how to set up the chess board, even though it's a computer game that can set itself up. Lazy fucking computers. Actually, I shouldn't insult the computer, since that just gives it reason to do what it's been doing for a long time: assume I'm a moron. Remember how I said that it padded things out? Part of that involves " click this square, asshole" quizzes. Again, why do I need to know this? Why can't you use this time to teach me chess? I'd say that the depths to which it goes to explain chess make you a better player, but I didn't get anything out of it. Maybe it's just me, but I couldn't always figure out what the computer wanted from me on a certain move. I should also mention that these moves were perfectly valid and would have achieved what the game was asking of me. That's all I learned: when the game was too strict. Not anything useful, like how to spot which pieces were best to capture or when an opportunity was open or when your pieces are threatened (the closest it ever comes to that is saying "forking is not a sex fetish, so stop leaving me in the background while you Google that"); just how to set yourself up for failure. Yes, that's an actual part of the tutorial. Yay.
 
Wait, did I just write an entire paragraph on the tutorial alone? Wow. But what about the chess? Well, again, it's chess. That means I have absolutely no goddamn idea how to play it or win in any capacity. All I know is that there's a class system that would put Fire Emblem to shame (soldiers can promote to paladins? Is this Tear Ring Saga, or am I tripping out?) and the Queen could totally kick my ass. (Of course, that last one applies to real life, as well.) Speaking of kicking ass, the only way I could do so would be if I fought a monkey. That's not a joke. That was actually the first game of chess that I won...and I still got my ass kicked pretty hard. The only difference between a real game of chess and this thing is the strategy; while I don't know what the word "offensive" means in an actual game of chess, my strategy here consists entirely of throwing units at my enemy and hoping that I checkmate them somehow. Oh, I might as well mention that there's a training mode and a ranked mode, and I won both. Are we done here? No? There's a puzzle thing? But that's just more chess! OK, now we're done here!
 

Review Synopsis

  • The tutorial assumes that you're a dumbass. Sometimes, it's right.
  • It's chess. What do I have to say.
  • Did I write more about chess than I did about Excitebike?
 
 
 
 
Speaking of Fire Emblem, remember my Aquaria blog, where I wanted the video in question to become a series? Somebody actually made that happen! Granted, the editing is kinda basic and the guy's voice sucks, but there's a lot of information to be found in these videos! I could imagine citing this in an essay...on Fire Emblem. I guess my point is that more colleges should offer, nay, FORCE people to take Fire Emblem as a major!
  
  

Doom 3

( Fun fact: this is my 1100th game beaten.) But I won't dwell on it too much, since anything not divisible by 500 is really boring. Wait, Doom 3 isn't divisible by 500 in any way possible. You end up with ugly decimals and stuff. Yet Doom 3 is not boring! I know that I'll probably get some crap for this (maybe I should go back to games where I don't say that at the beginning without fail), but Doom 3's pretty awesome.
 
Then again, it is essentially Half-Life. Don't believe me? Count how many times I say "sound familiar". Maybe drink to each one or something. Anyway, the game begins with a largely silent mook returning to yet another day of work in an exotic science place with more soda machines than science could ever need. Sound familiar? He is then sent to complete a minor task that ends up summoning all sorts of odd creatures whose first instinct is to murder everything they see. Sound familiar? Now all rests on his shoulders as he tries to contact the outside world, only to find out that there are about 20 more parts to the game. Sound familiar? Oh, and it turns out that this type of demon-summoning stuff has been going on for a while. Sound familiar? Also, Grey DeLisle is very clearly in this game. S...what? Who was in charge of that casting decision? Why's Kitty Katswell maintaining a demonic Mars outpost? Anyway, back to the Half-Life comparisons. One part of the game has you escaping deadly neurot-that's Portal. I'm thinking of Portal. I need a Half-Life comparison. Uhhh....the characters don't look too good. I know, I know, but there's just something really off about the way they look. Maybe it's the lip movements or the generic "we let cosmetologist students practice on a slab of ham" heads or the fact that one character in the game appears to have crossed eyes. I want you to think about that. Somebody was most likely specifically asked to give a character crossed eyes. Do I need to say anything else? Why is it that character models in first person shooters age so horribly?
 
Oh shit. This can't possibly end well.
And why this game in particular? They fucked that up, but everything else looks fantastic? How?....Maybe I should back up a bit. This game looks amazing. Keep in mind that I was playing this on the 360 (meaning that the introduction didn't know how to handle layering or aspect ratios), and for most of the game, I forgot that it was an Xbox game. I'd say "then again, I am the idiot who can only win a game of chess if it's against a monkey", but I don't want to detract from why this game looks so cool. I'd say something about textures or enemy models, but it's all in the lighting. I'll give you a minute to clean up the semen from your keyboard. You back? OK. As I was saying, the lighting in this game is really good. It looks realistic, at least given the circumstances (those rovers you Earthlings sent up are full of shit; Mars is a REALLY dark place), and it adds a lot to the atmosphere. For example, how do you make babies ripped from The Fly scarier? (It's not "make it the 1986 version".) You make it hard to see them. I know what you're going to say about it: it introduced a flashlight you had to use manually, which makes the game crap. Shut up. You can switch between your gun and the flashlight with the push of a single button. It's not a big deal. Hell, I actually hated the three levels where the game suddenly took away your flashlight. How am I supposed to see anything when the game is so dark and doesn't have proper lighting....in the form of a flashlight?
 
Wait, I realized something: this is an FPS, not a survival horror game. That's gonna cause some problems. For example, that demonic burst of laughter in every level is pretty cool if it's 1993, but not 2004, when the series is trying to be all serious and mature (at least compared to what came before it). And remember how that lighting works really well for scary scenes? Not gonna work too well for a game where you're trying to see your enemy. And having little to no ammo? Great if you want to be scared, but crap if it's because it's so stupidly easy to pour all your ammo into an enemy. (And it is.) And those zombies may be scary if it's a survival horror, but in an FPS, they-wait, those still work really well. Finally, somebody managed to make smart zombies and provide some goddamn justification for them wanting to murder you (what with the whole "possessed by Satan Claus" thing). Actually, now that I think about it, the enemies in this game are pretty cool. I've already mentioned zombies and fly-babies, but you also get Cthulhu if he let himself go, walking (and crawling) episiomoties, and  everything else you didn't know lurks in your nightmares. But id knows. Think about that tonight, while you sleep with your eyes open. That's what I love so much about the enemies: weird designs and some odd form of consistency (yes, this game somehow manages to make it believable the Cthulhu exists alongside fetus flies). What was I saying before? This game's effing awesome as an FPS!
 
Oh, you don't believe me? Have you seen the weapons in this game? They're effing awesome! What's not to love about chainsawing a guy in half...besides the fact that you put yourself within one foot of a demon who can burn your face off? OK, there's that, but then you have shotguns and plasma guns and other cool weapons and power-ups. There's even a power-up that just summons screams. It only comes up one or two times, and it serves no other purpose than to summon screams. Again: id knows what lurks in the dark corners of your mind. Oh, and remember the last FPS I played, where the weapons were just as cool, but there wasn't really any reason to switch from your regular assault rifle? (Of course you don't; Unknown_Pleasures was the only person who read the shitting thing.) Doom 3 laughs at such stupidity, and not just because of the ammo thing from before. Turns out that certain weapons are more powerful than others, so there's some amount of strategy in how you handle fights. I don't think I need to go into that. In fact, I don't think I need to go any further into Doom 3. Yea, I could say that there are some weird carry-overs from the PC (you mean I can quick save whenever I want, but that's the only save I'm getting?), or that the levels hold as many cool secrets as they do kinda-useless PDAs, but I think I got my point across. If I didn't, let me reiterate: Doom 3 is awesome. There. That's it. End of blog.
 

Review Synopsis

  • Imagine if Doom grew up a little. Now call it Half-Life, because that's what it is.
  • How does this game function well both as an FPS and a survival horror game?
  • Oh, now I remember: by combining zombies and chainsaws. Like Dead Rising, only not shit.
47 Comments
48 Comments
Posted by Video_Game_King

Chessmaster Challenge

( Well, this is certainly a weird blog, and trying to provide context will only make things stranger.) Some time ago, LordXavierBritish held a "contest": Photoshop Ryan Davis' face into a sunglasses-wearing pineapple for a free game on Steam. I entered with this (fun fact: I created that entirely with stabbing motions. With SpongeBob, that is the only way), and soon won my prize: a basic chess game with ranking and stuff. So what do I think of it? It's chess. It's fucking chess.
 
 Chessmaster Challenge assumes nothing except for your utter lack of mathematical skills.
Of course, it's chess with a lot of frills. For example: a profile system. For chess. It includes a bunch of incredibly stupid pictures and a typical character limit. As you can see, I chose the one character who looked normal in some way, since I don't want computers thinking me a mutated freak. That's how they know what to kill. Then again, I did show the computer that I was vulnerable by taking the tutorial. The long, long, long tutorial.  Let me give you an idea of how long it is: 29 parts, each one maybe 80-100 pages. Do I have to tell you how much they stretch this out? This game tells you how to set up the chess board, even though it's a computer game that can set itself up. Lazy fucking computers. Actually, I shouldn't insult the computer, since that just gives it reason to do what it's been doing for a long time: assume I'm a moron. Remember how I said that it padded things out? Part of that involves " click this square, asshole" quizzes. Again, why do I need to know this? Why can't you use this time to teach me chess? I'd say that the depths to which it goes to explain chess make you a better player, but I didn't get anything out of it. Maybe it's just me, but I couldn't always figure out what the computer wanted from me on a certain move. I should also mention that these moves were perfectly valid and would have achieved what the game was asking of me. That's all I learned: when the game was too strict. Not anything useful, like how to spot which pieces were best to capture or when an opportunity was open or when your pieces are threatened (the closest it ever comes to that is saying "forking is not a sex fetish, so stop leaving me in the background while you Google that"); just how to set yourself up for failure. Yes, that's an actual part of the tutorial. Yay.
 
Wait, did I just write an entire paragraph on the tutorial alone? Wow. But what about the chess? Well, again, it's chess. That means I have absolutely no goddamn idea how to play it or win in any capacity. All I know is that there's a class system that would put Fire Emblem to shame (soldiers can promote to paladins? Is this Tear Ring Saga, or am I tripping out?) and the Queen could totally kick my ass. (Of course, that last one applies to real life, as well.) Speaking of kicking ass, the only way I could do so would be if I fought a monkey. That's not a joke. That was actually the first game of chess that I won...and I still got my ass kicked pretty hard. The only difference between a real game of chess and this thing is the strategy; while I don't know what the word "offensive" means in an actual game of chess, my strategy here consists entirely of throwing units at my enemy and hoping that I checkmate them somehow. Oh, I might as well mention that there's a training mode and a ranked mode, and I won both. Are we done here? No? There's a puzzle thing? But that's just more chess! OK, now we're done here!
 

Review Synopsis

  • The tutorial assumes that you're a dumbass. Sometimes, it's right.
  • It's chess. What do I have to say.
  • Did I write more about chess than I did about Excitebike?
 
 
 
 
Speaking of Fire Emblem, remember my Aquaria blog, where I wanted the video in question to become a series? Somebody actually made that happen! Granted, the editing is kinda basic and the guy's voice sucks, but there's a lot of information to be found in these videos! I could imagine citing this in an essay...on Fire Emblem. I guess my point is that more colleges should offer, nay, FORCE people to take Fire Emblem as a major!
  
  

Doom 3

( Fun fact: this is my 1100th game beaten.) But I won't dwell on it too much, since anything not divisible by 500 is really boring. Wait, Doom 3 isn't divisible by 500 in any way possible. You end up with ugly decimals and stuff. Yet Doom 3 is not boring! I know that I'll probably get some crap for this (maybe I should go back to games where I don't say that at the beginning without fail), but Doom 3's pretty awesome.
 
Then again, it is essentially Half-Life. Don't believe me? Count how many times I say "sound familiar". Maybe drink to each one or something. Anyway, the game begins with a largely silent mook returning to yet another day of work in an exotic science place with more soda machines than science could ever need. Sound familiar? He is then sent to complete a minor task that ends up summoning all sorts of odd creatures whose first instinct is to murder everything they see. Sound familiar? Now all rests on his shoulders as he tries to contact the outside world, only to find out that there are about 20 more parts to the game. Sound familiar? Oh, and it turns out that this type of demon-summoning stuff has been going on for a while. Sound familiar? Also, Grey DeLisle is very clearly in this game. S...what? Who was in charge of that casting decision? Why's Kitty Katswell maintaining a demonic Mars outpost? Anyway, back to the Half-Life comparisons. One part of the game has you escaping deadly neurot-that's Portal. I'm thinking of Portal. I need a Half-Life comparison. Uhhh....the characters don't look too good. I know, I know, but there's just something really off about the way they look. Maybe it's the lip movements or the generic "we let cosmetologist students practice on a slab of ham" heads or the fact that one character in the game appears to have crossed eyes. I want you to think about that. Somebody was most likely specifically asked to give a character crossed eyes. Do I need to say anything else? Why is it that character models in first person shooters age so horribly?
 
Oh shit. This can't possibly end well.
And why this game in particular? They fucked that up, but everything else looks fantastic? How?....Maybe I should back up a bit. This game looks amazing. Keep in mind that I was playing this on the 360 (meaning that the introduction didn't know how to handle layering or aspect ratios), and for most of the game, I forgot that it was an Xbox game. I'd say "then again, I am the idiot who can only win a game of chess if it's against a monkey", but I don't want to detract from why this game looks so cool. I'd say something about textures or enemy models, but it's all in the lighting. I'll give you a minute to clean up the semen from your keyboard. You back? OK. As I was saying, the lighting in this game is really good. It looks realistic, at least given the circumstances (those rovers you Earthlings sent up are full of shit; Mars is a REALLY dark place), and it adds a lot to the atmosphere. For example, how do you make babies ripped from The Fly scarier? (It's not "make it the 1986 version".) You make it hard to see them. I know what you're going to say about it: it introduced a flashlight you had to use manually, which makes the game crap. Shut up. You can switch between your gun and the flashlight with the push of a single button. It's not a big deal. Hell, I actually hated the three levels where the game suddenly took away your flashlight. How am I supposed to see anything when the game is so dark and doesn't have proper lighting....in the form of a flashlight?
 
Wait, I realized something: this is an FPS, not a survival horror game. That's gonna cause some problems. For example, that demonic burst of laughter in every level is pretty cool if it's 1993, but not 2004, when the series is trying to be all serious and mature (at least compared to what came before it). And remember how that lighting works really well for scary scenes? Not gonna work too well for a game where you're trying to see your enemy. And having little to no ammo? Great if you want to be scared, but crap if it's because it's so stupidly easy to pour all your ammo into an enemy. (And it is.) And those zombies may be scary if it's a survival horror, but in an FPS, they-wait, those still work really well. Finally, somebody managed to make smart zombies and provide some goddamn justification for them wanting to murder you (what with the whole "possessed by Satan Claus" thing). Actually, now that I think about it, the enemies in this game are pretty cool. I've already mentioned zombies and fly-babies, but you also get Cthulhu if he let himself go, walking (and crawling) episiomoties, and  everything else you didn't know lurks in your nightmares. But id knows. Think about that tonight, while you sleep with your eyes open. That's what I love so much about the enemies: weird designs and some odd form of consistency (yes, this game somehow manages to make it believable the Cthulhu exists alongside fetus flies). What was I saying before? This game's effing awesome as an FPS!
 
Oh, you don't believe me? Have you seen the weapons in this game? They're effing awesome! What's not to love about chainsawing a guy in half...besides the fact that you put yourself within one foot of a demon who can burn your face off? OK, there's that, but then you have shotguns and plasma guns and other cool weapons and power-ups. There's even a power-up that just summons screams. It only comes up one or two times, and it serves no other purpose than to summon screams. Again: id knows what lurks in the dark corners of your mind. Oh, and remember the last FPS I played, where the weapons were just as cool, but there wasn't really any reason to switch from your regular assault rifle? (Of course you don't; Unknown_Pleasures was the only person who read the shitting thing.) Doom 3 laughs at such stupidity, and not just because of the ammo thing from before. Turns out that certain weapons are more powerful than others, so there's some amount of strategy in how you handle fights. I don't think I need to go into that. In fact, I don't think I need to go any further into Doom 3. Yea, I could say that there are some weird carry-overs from the PC (you mean I can quick save whenever I want, but that's the only save I'm getting?), or that the levels hold as many cool secrets as they do kinda-useless PDAs, but I think I got my point across. If I didn't, let me reiterate: Doom 3 is awesome. There. That's it. End of blog.
 

Review Synopsis

  • Imagine if Doom grew up a little. Now call it Half-Life, because that's what it is.
  • How does this game function well both as an FPS and a survival horror game?
  • Oh, now I remember: by combining zombies and chainsaws. Like Dead Rising, only not shit.
Posted by Hizang

I would much rather play Chess master than Doom 3, even Doom 2!

Posted by Video_Game_King

@Hizang:

The hell is wrong with you? Also, what about the first Doom? Do Doom fans have negative opinions about all Doom games after the first one?

Posted by Hizang

@Video_Game_King: To be honest i never played Doom.

I didn't even know it existed until a few weeks ago...

Posted by mylifeforAiur

I'd play Doom 3 if the Xbox 360's backward compatibility wasn't deficient.

Posted by Video_Game_King

@mylifeforAiur said:

I'd play Doom 3 if the Xbox 360's backward compatibility wasn't deficient.

You do realize that I was playing this on my 360, right? The only compatibility problems I had were "aspect ratio and layering is screwed up in the intro videos". It's not as bad as Return to Castle Wolfenstein (the frame rate is shit in some areas) or Battlefield 2 (doesn't work) or Goldeneye: Rogue Agent (also doesn't work).

Posted by mylifeforAiur

@Video_Game_King said:

@mylifeforAiur said:

I'd play Doom 3 if the Xbox 360's backward compatibility wasn't deficient.

You do realize that I was playing this on my 360, right? The only compatibility problems I had were "aspect ratio and layering is screwed up in the intro videos". It's not as bad as Return to Castle Wolfenstein (the frame rate is shit in some areas) or Battlefield 2 (doesn't work) or Goldeneye: Rogue Agent (also doesn't work).

Ah, well I guess it's more a case of my Xbox not being in the best condition. I don't know, the game would always freeze while I was playing. I fear that my moribund Xbox is not long for this world.

Posted by Video_Game_King
@mylifeforAiur
 
To be fair, it did freeze a bit on mine, but not so much that it became a major problem. That frame rate thing I mentioned, though...
Posted by Still_I_Cry

Doom 3. Maybe a play.

On second thought..no..no.

Posted by ArbitraryWater

If I could major in Fire Emblem, a lot of my problems in regards to choosing a major would be solved. Sadly though, I think the extent of career options for such a major would be just making videos like that guy. Also, like you, I am bad at chess but good at Fire Emblem.

Posted by Video_Game_King
@Still_I_Cry
 
Why not?
 
@ArbitraryWater said:

Also, like you, I am bad at chess but good at Fire Emblem.

Is that just the natural order of things? Is there somebody who's good at both? Or would Benjamin Franklin curse the man who invented Bolting?
Posted by Guided_By_Tigers
Posted by Video_Game_King
@Unknown_Pleasures
 
Speaking of which, what happened to id? I know that Doom and Duke Nukem have gotten XBLA releases, and there was that Wolfenstein game a year ago (I think), but that's about it. Do people just prefer military exploits to space marines blasting up demons?
Posted by Guided_By_Tigers

They were busy working on Rage....Doom 4 is still in development and now that Rage is done they should be focusing more on Doom 4.

Posted by Still_I_Cry

@Video_Game_King: Doesn't look like my kind of game.

Posted by Video_Game_King
@Unknown_Pleasures
 
I think the fact that I didn't know Rage was being made by id shows how little I know about them or about Rage (all I know is "it's like Borderlands, only with a Wolfenstein reference, for some reason").
 
@Still_I_Cry
 
How so? What's not to like about shooting up demons in the dark?
Posted by Example1013

Just don't play chess against the computer. It will always win. I've beaten people who've been playing chess most of their lives, but I can't beat the damn computer, even on easy.

Posted by Video_Game_King

@Example1013:

That's exactly what I did here, though, and I won. Granted, it was against a monkey, and I lost a lot of pieces, but I won, damn it.

Posted by Example1013

And if you actually want to get good at chess (you probably don't, this is just a general reference) play against yourself. Try to outwit yourself. Plan out every possible move for one side, then take that knowledge and try to beat it from the other side. I don't really enjoy it much because it's tedious and requires a lot of thinking (keeping track of three different sets of eight possible turns ahead at once is boring as hell, since it's not actually moving), but it'll elevate your game. Just don't ever go in expecting to win any tournaments ever. The people who are really good at chess have been groomed since birth to be really good at chess. They've been playing longer than you, and they're probably smarter than you. Kind of like the computer.

Posted by Example1013

@Video_Game_King: Maybe Chessmaster is easier than than the default chess included with OS X, because even a small bump over minimum difficulty results in me getting my ass kicked.

Posted by Video_Game_King

@Example1013:

I honestly have no idea how playing against myself would make me better. I imagine it would be like talking to yourself in AIM.

Posted by Example1013

@Video_Game_King: You may not think it'd make you better, but trust me, it would. The process of playing yourself is, you come up with a move on one side, and then have to come up with a counter on the other (best-case would be you stalemate yourself). So you start to see how to counter a certain move, because you've been on both sides of the board from it many times, and as you're able to see larger implications of moves and see more possible turns into the future, your strategies can become more complex.

I'd say that playing yourself is probably better for improving your skill than playing the computer. I used to do it during my free hour in middle school, and the improvement was remarkable.

Posted by Video_Game_King

@Example1013:

Although that seems to be missing the issue that you're playing against yourself, meaning you'll probably end up making the same moves on both sides. The only way I can see different strategies arising from this is by you causing one side to fuck up on purpose, like moving a queen next to a pawn and then shoving the king into the front lines.

Posted by LordXavierBritish

Worth it.

Posted by Example1013

@Video_Game_King: No, that misses the point. You're trying (on each side) to beat the other by making a move that will actually put you ahead. Most likely what will happen is that on one turn you'll slip up and make a mistake (not on purpose, just carelessness), and the other side will win. Ideally this wouldn't happen because you'd make a mistake for neither side, and that would result in a stalemate. The reason you don't copy yourself and make the same moves for both sides is because you know that will end in a stalemate, which defeats the purpose, since the purpose is to try to win as both white and black.

Edited by believer258

I stumbled across this while looking at the comments in the Doom 3 BFG edition news article. I was looking at that because I also just finished the Doom 3 Xbox version and thought it was awesome, and was interested in playing the better looking and playing BFG edition.

Anyway, I should probably mention that the PC version of Doom 3 (which is presumably what the BFG edition will include) had a fair bit more - and different - content in the original campaign. A lot of areas from the original Xbox version were gimped or cut out altogether, so maybe the BFG edition will be well-worth a revisit.

EDIT: When posting this, I did not think about the effect that bumping might have on a nine month old thread.

Ooops.

Posted by Carryboy

Sorry i only skim read this what's happening they releasing Doom chess?

Posted by yoshisaur

Doom 3 was an enjoyable experience for me. I remember it being the first game to make me want to spend $2,000 on a new computer.

Posted by WarlordPayne

I thought Doom 3 was great, I never understood all the hate it gets.

Posted by Napalm

@Video_Game_King said:

@Hizang:

The hell is wrong with you? Also, what about the first Doom? Do Doom fans have negative opinions about all Doom games after the first one?

Oh my god, you like Doom 3. I fucking love Doom 3. I knew we had something in common. I knew it. Goddamn it. Give me a hug.

Posted by Jay444111

Welp... I gotta be honest. When I play chest, I must look like a damn drunk in terms of effective strategy... Yeah, I remember playing even the gameboy chessmaster which had barely anything to it and it still kicked my ass... Chess is not for me... but Chess Boxing on the other hand!

I think I would totally do that though. A actual sport that relies on mind and matter? FUCK YEAH!

Posted by pweidman

I've tried playing Doom 3 on my 360, and it gets by but runs and looks funky. Anyway hasn't Bethesda promised a spruced up Doom 3 for 360 later this year? I liked the game on my xbox, but never finished it, and I'd buy a redux if it wasn't too expensive.

Posted by Aetheldod

The only thing I dont like about Doom3 is the wimpy sounds of the guns .... they are so lame :(

Posted by Carryboy

@Jay444111: This is fucking nuts

Posted by Video_Game_King

I leave to see The Dark Knight Rises, and this is what I return to. '-_-

@believer258 said:

EDIT: When posting this, I did not think about the effect that bumping might have on a nine month old thread.

Ooops.

LOOK AT WHAT YOU HAVE WROUGHT!

@believer258 said:

Anyway, I should probably mention that the PC version of Doom 3 (which is presumably what the BFG edition will include) had a fair bit more - and different - content in the original campaign. A lot of areas from the original Xbox version were gimped or cut out altogether, so maybe the BFG edition will be well-worth a revisit.

In terms of gameplay, absolutely. In terms of a blog? I've my doubts. What more could I say about it? "Yea, it's still Doom 3, and Doom 3 is still pretty good, you guys." Then again, I'd totally play Persona 4 Golden again and blog about that, sooooo.....

@Carryboy said:

Sorry i only skim read this what's happening they releasing Doom chess?

If I remember correctly, I played chess against a monkey and played a version of Half Life 1 where Grey DeLisle forced you to use a flashlight a whole ton.

@ck1nd said:

Doom 3 was an enjoyable experience for me. I remember it being the first game to make me want to spend $2,000 on a new computer.

@WarlordPayne said:

I thought Doom 3 was great, I never understood all the hate it gets.

Me neither. Hell, I don't even understand people saying it strayed from the Doom formula. It's still Doom; just a Doom that decided to grow up.

@Napalm said:

@Video_Game_King said:

@Hizang:

The hell is wrong with you? Also, what about the first Doom? Do Doom fans have negative opinions about all Doom games after the first one?

Oh my god, you like Doom 3. I fucking love Doom 3. I knew we had something in common. I knew it. Goddamn it. Give me a hug.

For any and all hug needs, refer to my comment in 's Fragile Dreams blog. Speaking of Jay...

@Jay444111 said:

Welp... I gotta be honest. When I play chest, I must look like a damn drunk in terms of effective strategy

You're not supposed to grope about like a sloppy madman, you damn fool. You're supposed to massage the nipples until they get hard, and then you pinch them ever so softly. Strategy, man!

@pweidman:

Yea, the emulation isn't perfect, as I noted before, but it was still perfectly fine for me. And I guess Bethesda is releasing an upgraded Doom 3 later this year. Certainly explains the bumping of this blog. Speaking of which...

@believer258 said:

EDIT: When posting this, I did not think about the effect that bumping might have on a nine month old thread.

Ooops.

LOOK AT WHAT YOU HAVE WROUGHT!

@Aetheldod said:

The only thing I dont like about Doom3 is the wimpy sounds of the guns .... they are so lame :(

I'd respond to this post properly if I remembered what the guns actually sounded like. I remember walking around in darkness and shooting a ton of things, along with an extended neurotoxin portion of the game.

Posted by yoshisaur

@Video_Game_King: Will you hate me if I admit to not understanding your picture response?

Posted by Video_Game_King

@ck1nd:

The sodium confuses you, does it not? It is unimportant.

Posted by TheVeteran13

Chessmaster has bitchin music

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Posted by Fattony12000
Posted by believer258

@Video_Game_King said:

I leave to see The Dark Knight Rises, and this is what I return to. '-_-

@believer258 said:

EDIT: When posting this, I did not think about the effect that bumping might have on a nine month old thread.

Ooops.

LOOK AT WHAT YOU HAVE WROUGHT!

@believer258 said:

Anyway, I should probably mention that the PC version of Doom 3 (which is presumably what the BFG edition will include) had a fair bit more - and different - content in the original campaign. A lot of areas from the original Xbox version were gimped or cut out altogether, so maybe the BFG edition will be well-worth a revisit.

In terms of gameplay, absolutely. In terms of a blog? I've my doubts. What more could I say about it? "Yea, it's still Doom 3, and Doom 3 is still pretty good, you guys." Then again, I'd totally play Persona 4 Golden again and blog about that, sooooo.....

@believer258 said:

EDIT: When posting this, I did not think about the effect that bumping might have on a nine month old thread.

Ooops.

LOOK AT WHAT YOU HAVE WROUGHT!

@Aetheldod said:

The only thing I dont like about Doom3 is the wimpy sounds of the guns .... they are so lame :(

I'd respond to this post properly if I remembered what the guns actually sounded like. I remember walking around in darkness and shooting a ton of things, along with an extended neurotoxin portion of the game.

Well, this is certainly an oddity. I've never seen someone post the same thing twice in the same post before. And I really did mean in terms of gameplay, not necessarily another blog, though a dual P4 Golden and Doom 3 BFG throwback blog could be a good idea. You never know, how often do you get the chance to replay two games you really liked in a new package for each?

Also, I thought most of Doom's guns sounded all right. Most of them at least felt pretty good, and I think the shotgun actually sounded pretty good, but I'm in the minority on this. I don't think they were meant to boom as much as you might think because the game was so much more about tight quarters, corridors, and enemies lurking in the dark than previous games.

Posted by MordeaniisChaos

@Video_Game_King: Rook to King. Checkmate.

Posted by Video_Game_King

@believer258 said:

though a dual P4 Golden and Doom 3 BFG throwback blog could be a good idea. You never know, how often do you get the chance to replay two games you really liked in a new package for each?

That would be the shortest blog ever. I'd have to replay two other games I don't remember to give it some meat.

@MordeaniisChaos:

We're not playing chess. *transforms into Hardin* That was your mistake.

Posted by TruthTellah

@Video_Game_King: Aw. You're not playing chess anymore? Now I am filled with the greatest of sadness.

Posted by pyromagnestir

Monkey wouldn't stand a chance against me if we was playing Connect Four. Diagonal motherfucker.

I just noticed motherfucker does not get spell checked on this website. I love this website.

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Posted by phrali

chessmaster is a joke in the chess community. Get some rybka or fritz. And no one will ever learn to play well by playing against a computer. thats like training to be a sprinter by footracing against a ferrari. You learn to play chess by studying tactical problems and the games of strong players. Humans cannot learn or play like computers. Computers play by calculating. Humans play by pattern recognition.

Posted by Video_Game_King
Posted by redbliss

@mylifeforAiur said:

@Video_Game_King said:

@mylifeforAiur said:

I'd play Doom 3 if the Xbox 360's backward compatibility wasn't deficient.

You do realize that I was playing this on my 360, right? The only compatibility problems I had were "aspect ratio and layering is screwed up in the intro videos". It's not as bad as Return to Castle Wolfenstein (the frame rate is shit in some areas) or Battlefield 2 (doesn't work) or Goldeneye: Rogue Agent (also doesn't work).

Ah, well I guess it's more a case of my Xbox not being in the best condition. I don't know, the game would always freeze while I was playing. I fear that my moribund Xbox is not long for this world.

I had the same type of issues. I experienced a lot more freezing with Doom 3 on the 360 than on the original xbox. Still, the game is worth getting on the PC or when that BFE edition comes out (assuming you could play the game the same way the original was).

Posted by pyromagnestir

@Video_Game_King: That may be the best reply I've ever received.

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