By Video_Game_King 9 Comments
Apparently, I am not just the king of video games. I also seem to have dominion over Scrabble, that word game where you yell at your friends for playing words you don't know. Usually I'm one of those friends, kicking ass with words like matey (75 points to victory), advent, and queue. These words have led me to numerous victories, a fact that has no doubt angered a few gods. Why? Well, today, I can confidently say that I was a participant in the most fucked up game of Scrabble. I assure you that none of this is made up at all.
Things started off weird when both me and my foe discovered that we were playing on a French board. "Whatever," we both thought, "we'll play in English. What could go wrong?" How naive we were. My opponent started with the word "revert", and from then on, gained a noticeable lead with words like "quiet" and "Zeus" (with a blank for a Z). Speaking of blanks, I believe the first thing we noticed was that there were four blanks. Frightened, I appeased the deities by playing the French word "haute." This was not enough, apparently; they had decided my fate long in advance.
Defying them with balls that had grown to massively unsafe levels, I played Mamon. So many things were wrong with this: proper noun, misspelling, I got it from a video game, but in the end, we accepted the term. But the Board Game Gods did not. This is the part where reality starts slipping apart: I noticed that the first M was worth 3 points, but then the second was only 2. As if that was not enough, guess what I pulled from the box (no bag was available) close to playing that word? Yes, the actually-existing letter on the right.
If you're keeping track of the languages, this is a Spanish letter played on a French board. In an "English" word. Yes, more perplexing is the fact that I managed to play this in a word of my own invention: runñer. Used in a sentence: I will runñer ass over. Again, I am not lying. You may find it funny, but the oft-mentioned Board Game Gods obviously did not. Things progressed further downward as we discovered the following anomalies, like:
- A fifth blank, but with a P sneakily written on. I used it as a U in my next word, which by the way...
- There were two Qs in play, spread across three words: quiet, qualm, and quiet. Yes, quiet was played twice, no doubt in hubris.
- Several letters were missing, like a G and a K. However, there were 8 O's.
- I ended up winning, 185 to 158, despite having had my ass handed to me earlier. Not even the gods can keep me separated from victory.
So you may ask yourself, "What was the point of this self-indulgent tale?" or "Why did you post this in Off-Topic?" Well, it is a warning to never anger Scrabblor, God of Scrabble. However, there may be other ways. Therefore, I implore that you post your weirdest board game experience so that others may not anger Scrabblor again. Post your weirdest experiences, damnit! IT IS YOUR DUTY!!!