Many other people have written much, much better things about Ryan Davis than I ever will but sometimes you just need to write your thoughts down on even if they're incomprehensible.
"Ryan Davis can't die."
Those were my thoughts when reading the news story about Ryan's tragic death last week. "But it's Ryan motherfucking Davis" I kept thinking as I tried to make sense of it all. When you watch, listen, and experience (that's the only way I can describe Ryan persona, it was one hell of an experience) a person every week for over 5 or 6 years it's natural to assume that that will continue forever. Unfortunately, that isn't true. Ryan and the Bombcrew have been one of the few constants over the last few years of my life. As many others have said, no matter what crap was going on in our lives Giant Bomb has always been there to lift our spirits, whether it be the Bombcast, Quick Looks, I Love Mondays, (WU)TANG, Endurance Runs and of course the countless livestreams expertly hosted by Ryan.
It hurts. Sometime you don't understand how much a person means to you until they're no longer there. I never got a chance to meet him but that didn't stop me from feeling a huge loss (obviously nothing compared to that of his wife, family, friends and the GB guys). Neither did the thousands of people who've been sharing their memories over the last two days. It's a testament to his character that by just seeing or hearing him you felt a close bond. This was a person worth listening to because he was 100% genuine. He didn't need to hide behind a fake persona because who he was was so amazingly funny, so charmingly garrulous, so incredibly witty that you couldn't help but pay attention to him. He trusted his audience and let us in to his life. Who else would tell us a story of how they sat on a cake naked? Who else would drink human breast milk live on stage in front of an audience of adoring fans?
Even now I still haven't fully processed that he's actually gone. I keep reading all the wonderful eulogies and have to remind myself that he's not coming back and I have one less constant in my life. What's helped ease the pain has been another constant, the Giant Bomb community. Seriously, I love you guys. Reading all the tributes paid to such a wonderful man has been incredibly uplifting. I have friends that are into games but not to the same extent as people who would frequent a video game message board. Being able to talk to people who share your interests about such a nerdy hobby is wonderful. I feel so lucky to be able to contribute to site that Ryan helped found and that has such an amazing fanbase. So thanks duders. And thanks Ryan for being a part of mine and so many others' lives. I hope you're sitting on cake in heaven right now.
(Ryan would probably be annoyed by the pretentious blog title but it was the first thing that came to mind.)