The Story Of Shimmeroiled

#1 Edited by Shofixti (154 posts) -


This thread serves as a storage point for the story we are generating in the Giant Bomb Community Succession Game. All comments are welcome! However, I'm still trying to get 12 posts set up here before random comments begin. If you think you can be relied on to update a post when the next player finishes his turn, it would be awesome if you could help me by making a post that just says THIRD YEAR - in Header 2.


Well, it's been fun. I did my year as fast as I possibly could. I'm going to a wedding this week in California, so fearing I would let everyone down, I just did this as fast as possible. Luckily, the first year is always the easiest Let's just hope I didn't set us up for failure.


So, following an arduous journey, we arrived at Shimmeroiled, and immediately began digging out our mountain halls. And what a location! I've never lived in such luxury in all my life. The first time I set my pick to the stone, I struck gold! We sent a dwarf out to chop wood, and all he could find was mahogany! We're building a home fit for the king of the realm! I found a nice little nook to begin digging. I like grand entrances, so I immediately created plans to create a grand entrance to our keep. Over time, I envision a grand gate of gold greeting foreigners to our noble fortress. I also planned a great dining room and meeting hall near the entrance. Oh, and bedrooms. We'll need to sleep.

I ordered another dwarf to start a farm near the entrance. Once he had prepared the soil, we realized that we had failed to bring anything to farm above the ground. Oops. Perhaps a caravan will bring us seed. To make matters worse, the floors of our fortress were solid stone. I began digging towards the sand walls and eastern marshes, hoping to find land that could be farmed. I must say that I wasn't particularly worried about food. We had a talented fisherdwarf with our group, who had set up a workshop in the cave. We were entirely capable of subsisting on a diet of fish. What worried me was our alcohol supply. Without something to drink, we could all go crazy.

One level below where we began digging our habitations, I discovered a sand floor! And this was no ordinary sand, either, it was loamy sand! Some other dwarves and I dug out a small cavern in order to begin a Dimple Cup farm. I just love loamy sand.

Our work was mostly uninterrupted. We dug out places to sleep, places to work, and places to store food. Eventually, a dwarven caravan arrived. They didn't have anything we could use to start an outdoor farm. We just traded some exquisitely made chairs for foreign cheeses and grizzly bear meat.

Our peace ended quickly, with the arrival of a monster.

Look at that hideous creature. I was informed of the creature's arrival when some of the dwarves left their work and rushed indoors, consumed by fear. That... thing ran around our supply piles, and scared everyone off. I had never seen so hideous a beast in all my life. I asked the other, and one knew what it was: a Coati.

Typically, he explained, Coati are small animals. Our nemesis was gigantic and muscular, with handsome chestnut hair, and menacing black eyes. I assessed the situation. We had no weapons, and no one capable of killing the beast. Someone suggested that I build up and army, but I'm a pacifist. I'll let my successor take care of that. He had done nothing more than scare us up to this point, so I just decided to let him be. After a while, he left, and we got back to work.

Eventually, some migrants showed up. With them came a talented engraver. He and I took upon ourselves the task of decorating Shimmeroiled's stone walls. By the time I'm finished here, this fortress will be a magnificent site to behold. Apparently, our Coati friend head that there were new dwarves to scare, so he came back. He frightened us all. One of the new dwarves brought a crossbow, which the coati stole. Fiend!

I quickly tired of my responsibilities as leader. Before passing leadership to another, however, I made sure to commission a monument near the entrance of the fort in my honor. It shall be my resting place after I have lived a long, fruitful life.


I'm not a very good writer, so sorry about that. Nothing too exciting happened, so sorry if it's a bit dry. I'm not a very good DF player, either. I hope that none of you hate me. Oh, and please make sure to adorn my tomb with golden statues. I deserve it.

Good luck,

#2 Edited by Shofixti (154 posts) -


BoG set up the fort extremely well and I thank him for giving me a fort in great shape. Here is what happened under my watch.

What the fort looked liked when I got it.

I have been tasked with running a up and coming colony away from the Mountain Homes known as Shimmeroiled. I do not know why the previous leader had to give up his post but I am confident in my abilities to take over where he left off. When I arrived I was surprised to see many things were set up outside, which I have not seen done at any Dwarven settlement I have ever been to. But when I enter I discovered the wonders this place holds, gold. So much gold. The place is packed with it. I will be rich, I mean we all shall be rich.

First thing first, move everything inside. What kind of Dwarf lives outside? As my first act as Overseer I ordered walls to be built around the depot to make things more secure and to have all the stockpiles moved from outside indoors. It seems no one knew that animals needed grass to eat so I rushed to get them into a pasture outside. Sadly a young yak calf died before I was able to save it, but we now have a place for grazing animals to stay.

First birth of the New Year

Mazel tov! Rith, our woodcutter gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. While I did not actually deliver the baby myself, that was our lovely female doctor Dodok (how progressive), I was there in spirit and trust she will look up to me as she grows under my rule. In mid spring we had more migrants! How wonderful, under my watch this fortress is growing gloriously. 25 new souls, more than doubling what I was originally assigned to watch over. A weaker Dwarf would find this slightly problomatic but I am sure I can handle it.

Since I was tasked by my predecessor to build an army and now that I have expen...willing souls I shall do such a thing. It shall be the greatest military force in all of Dwarfdom and they shall be known as The Scorching Constructs (They came up with the name, don't ask me).

I spoke too soon. We are doomed. Before our fine soldiers even came together as a squad a monstrous beast appeared. The terrifying Werelizard Cilko Ebbakpos has come for us and I have no idea if we will survive. For the first time in my life I truly know fear, may Armok help us. I am ushering everyone I can to a burrow underground to save as many as I can. I shall let our brave Dwarves and Lady Dwarves in the armed forces train on the job. Without any weapons...

Human scum and the loss of our first Dwarf. May he rest in peace.

The monster was a human! He killed our ranger and turned into a dirty human! What are the humans doing where they let one of their own turn into a monster and come to kill my citizens? They will pay. The memory of Tobul Urvaddolush shall live on in the halls of Shimmeroiled for all time. Sadly Cilko got away before he could be killed. I hope he does not come back because I do not know if will be ready for his return. And not even a moment after people were let out of the burrow did a dwarf become possessed and claim a Craftdwarf's workshop. So much mayhem. He did end up making a lovely scepter though.

What will he build?


Can we not get a moment of peace? Thankfully he was quickly taken care of. Our military proved itself on its first time in real combat and gained much needed experience. Though they could still use more, I don't know how they will fair against a invading Goblin army. Too bad they don't like to train...

For a while there I thought every thing was fine but something far worse than we had yet to experience showed up.

Elves. The thought of their pointy ears and hippie nature disgusts me. They think they are so much better than us just because they don't require step ladders to reach the top shelf. Since all of the goods we had to trade were made of wood I could give them nothing without inquiring a war which I do not want and am not ready to fight. I could not even give them gold because they did not have enough room to carry it. I was happy to see the tree huggers leave and hope the next caravan is more accepting of our wares. I will have to speed up rock craft construction so they will give us the time of day without begin disgusted next time they visit.

In mid summer we got even more migrants. 12 this time. And we had another birth, this time the doctor delivered her own baby. Quite impressive.

Today one of the population has been stuck with a fey mood. He was blabbing and acting very strange when all of a sudden he commandeered a carpenter shop and will not let anyone in and will not leave. I have no idea why he needs it or what he is doing but I hope it is for a good reason.

Another birth and even more migrants! 10 this time. Under my rule Shimmeroiled is growing and becoming an extremely prosperous settlement. They shall raise me though the ages as one of our people's greatest leaders and for that I think I need a tomb to celebrate my life after I leave this world.

My modest tomb on the left with BoG's beneath it.

No no no no no! We could not get Sakzul what he wanted and he has gone madly insane and is attacking people! Why do such things have to happen under my watch?! Oh Armok no... He has killed a baby... How could this have happened? A poor innocent baby, dead, just because he could not find some stupid item. So senseless. Thankfully our military took care of him before he could take any more innocent lives.

He got most of his teeth knocked out before he was taken down

Finally a real caravan of hearty fellow Dwarves has shown up. We can get the things we need and don't have to worry about giving them wood.

Before they even get to the trade depot a Goblin snatcher showed up! Goblins are such foul creatures, almost as bad as the Elves.

He stole the doctors baby! Thankfully our hunter was near by and killed the Goblin and reunited mother and child. It must have been a harrowing experience for them both. Thankfully the traders helped by giving us some much needed booze and a lot of food. They even traded us a handful of military equipment though we still need much more to have them well equipped.

As soon as winter starts another Goblin snatcher comes to try and steal our children and when we scare him off another one appears! Why do they want to give our fort such stress? We have already lost one infant and have had another child kidnapped already even if for a short time. Even a kobold thief comes! When will they leave us alone?!

I have been thinking of the crazy carpenter incident and have decided it could have been handled much better. So I have decided to make a jail room and appoint a sheriff. I hope in the future the peace can be kept and any events that happen within the fort can be taken care of without lose of life.

It seems during a fight, I have no idea which, one of the militia hurt their foot, so I am building a hospital. Sadly it is not fully stocked or really up to snuff in most ways. We do have a Chief Medical Dwarf at least.

The crazy carpenter turned into a ghost!

It chopped off Zulgar the potash maker's leg off! Can this damned carpenter not leave us alone?! Has he not already done enough damage in his life and now he needs to terrorize us in death. Good thing we have a doctor on staff to help him. After Sakzul killed that young helpless baby Dwarf I did not think he deserved a proper burial so I left him to rot in a corpse pile, but it seems even the unjust deserve more than that. I did not want to do it but I placed his body in a coffin to help ease his soul. Thankfully he was put to rest before he could hurt anyone else.

The coati has been taken care of. I did not think it was possible but I did it. Even back in the mountain homes I heard tails of this monstrous beast. Children were told about it during ghost stories, bards sung of it as cautionary tales, it was the stuff nightmares were made of. I admit it now, even I was afraid of it before I took this job, I was strongly considering not coming here. I ended up putting it in the back of my mind believing that it could possibly not be real. It however was and not its blood covers the walls and ground leading to the trade depot there for all to see. I shall be heralded as a hero across all of the Dwarven kingdoms. Some skeptics may claim that there is no body and that just because there is blood everywhere that it is not dead but to them I say how could a creature lose so much blood and survive? Others may say that I was not the one that actually fought the beast but it happened under my orders and under my rule and I should get as much credit as those soldiers that gave the final killing blow.

The year is coming to an end and with it my time here as Overseer. I do not know how much more stress I can take and I have decided to step down at the start of spring. I am sure the Mountain Homes can send a suitable replacement. I think I am going to stick around though but as a miner with the other former leader BoG, it seems like a nice way to spend retirement. At the end of my reign we had four more babies born, many of the parents I am sure looked at me and were spurred to love under my prosperous rule. As my final act I appointed a book keeper to keep track of all our stocks which I am sure will come in handy for my replacement.


That was fun. Some people died, 3 in total, but the fort survived. I hope I gave Seaborgium enough to work with and that everything is ok for him. Some things that I think still need to be done.

  1. BoG's tomb still needs a gold statue. Sorry BoG
  2. The military needs to train more and get better equipped. Goblins are coming.
  3. The hospital needs to be stocked.
  4. Some of the workshops could be better organized and some are not completed yet.
  5. Many more beds and doors need to be made for the 2nd floor bedrooms. The upstairs ones still need cabinets and things still need to be smoothed and engraved.
  6. Other stuff I am sure.

Here is what the fort looked like at the end.

There is a 3rd floor but it really just has the jail on it.

Good luck!

#3 Edited by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

THIRD YEAR - Seaborgium

So I guess I've been assigned to Shimmeroiled. I was retired, but hey, the sunshine was running low and the pay was good. Said the place was littered with gold, and that I could have my share of the riches, no strings attached. Well, I did some poking around. Turns out there's a bunsoth coati in the place, they have ghost problems, and their children are being actively stolen by goblin thieves. No strings attached, huh? What a bunch of zagstok. Not like I've got anything better to do, though.

It's been years since I've managed a fortress, probably due to the whole.... well, it's been years since I've managed a fortress. First things first, let's take a look at the personnel records.

Could use a bit of cleaning up. Looks like the previous overseers met the migrants with open arms. In a mature fortress I'd start to suspect that the overseer was a no-good elf-lover, but it's only our third year; I can keep them busy.

That's better.

The fortress is a little disorganized as well. The first level has: A bunch of bedrooms (minimal and noble), many scattered workshops (including a small farm), a dining room, some tombs, and a bunch of stockpiles. I'm thinking that the second level will be the living area. I'll expand the bedrooms and we can start moving the rest of the migrant scum there. I'll make a nice dining room as well, keep the dwarves happy - once they're ecstatic we can start systematically butchering their pets, reduce the potential of tantrum spiraling and petsplosions and such. Later on I can build out some noble rooms.

I'll clear out a big workshop space on the third level and start moving the workshops there, too. Other than that, the previous overseer left a to-do list, which I'll work on.

It looks like everyone is practicing some kind of mass tableau vivant right now (I hear it's very big in the Mountainhomes). They've just been standing stock-still for the past few hours while I've been going through this paperwork. I'm done with the basic planning, though, so I'd better get up and tell them all to get to work.

After having a chat with Davey, I decided to start building up our military. It seemed that our military dwarves were simply sitting around. I believe the problem was that for some reason, they didn't understand that the barracks was meant for them, despite their being the only military squad in the fortress. I assigned the barracks to the Scorching Constructs, told them to start a training schedule, and they promptly began to train correctly.

The liason came. I can't think of much that we need, but I asked him to bring some food, as well as fuel and metal for our metalsmithing industry. They said that they wanted various things as well; the main products that we can easily provide are cut gems, figurines, and goblets.

A lowly hauler, Zuglar, was suddenly struck by a strange mood. We rejoiced when he created a turquoise cage, instantly making him a legendary gem cutter, and promptly ordered him to get to work cutting the scores of gems that the miners have uncovered.

A snatcher appeared! Fortunately, we were prepared for him.



After an intense battle, our squad triumphed over the goblin snatcher with a mere six dwarves lying incapacitated on the battlefield. Glory to the Scorching Constructs!

Unfortunately, we now have to deal with the aftermath. The hospital situation is in complete chaos. Our only doctor is on break. Our mechanic is too busy loading stonefall traps to build the traction benches we need. Dwarves aren't building hospital beds because they're hauling cabinets or doors. The injured are wasting away in the barracks; weeks after the battle, one injured dwarf remains on the battlefield, unable to move, with not a single dwarf willing to carry him in.

And now we have another kobold thief. Great, guess I'd better send the Scorching Constructs after him again. Let's hope he doesn't slaughter what's left of them.

Armok, the one dwarf left on the battlefield with a broken leg is trying to hobble after him. Well, he escaped, so no harm done, I guess.

Well, I managed to draft some haulers as makeshift doctors, and the soldiers have apparently healed. Nevertheless, they still have broken limbs and infections which will probably kill them, in time.

There was a fairly uneventful period following this. Some elven traders arrived. I asked the broker to trade and ordered him not to do anything else, but he decided to spend his time partying, drinking, and taking breaks until the traders finally decided to leave. I ordered that the trade depot be deconstructed so that we could nevertheless relieve the elven traders of their burden. Now the traders appear to be sitting here without leaving, preventing us from building a new trade depot.

I did, however, manage to requisition a few golden statues, two of which I've placed in the future tomb of our dear founder, BoG. I've also constructed an enormous amount of bedrooms underground. These should provide for a slightly safer living area for all the peasantry.

Something strange is happening with the farmers. My records show that we have nearly two hundred plump helmet spawn, but both the farmers refuse to plant any plump helmets. This is very strange. We have run out of booze, which is a serious problem. It could be a problem with how many seed bags we have. Hopefully my successor will be able to rectify the farm situation.

A number of goblin snatchers arrived throughout the year. Fearful of a repeat of the previous snatcher incident, I let them steal our babies freely. We have enough of a population as it is, anyhow. On that note, I've been noticing a troubling increase in the number of idlers throughout the fortress. My advisors assure me that without work to do, the dwarves will surely turn to hooliganism. To nip this problem in the bud, I've recruited a large stone-detailing force, and drafted a second military squad and converted half of the dining room into a barracks.

We've been ambushed!

The goblins are absolutely slaughtering us. Several dwarves were struck down while drinking at the pools of water outside. They never stood a chance.

I've ordered every dwarf inside. I've built a fair number of traps; hopefully they'll slow the goblins down. The merchants have some guards with them as well.

I'll order the miners to dig a channel in the main entrance. If all else fails, we'll have sealed ourselves inside. Only problem is, with the farming problems we've had, we'll soon starve to death.

The military are disobeying orders and leaving the fortress to drink! They're running straight into death. I've decommissioned every last dwarf; hopefully that'll keep them inside.

The goblins are at the gates. Armok preserve us.

A single goblin has rushed in. The trap doorway has proven extremely effective, incapacitating him entirely.

What's more, the caravan guards are heading out to attack. Perhaps we'll survive this ambush after all.

Well, it's spring now. Two goblins are down; two remain outside, butchering our livestock. I just got a message from the mountainhomes; after the goblin situation, I'm being "retired" again. They're sending in some new guy, Sankis something-or-other, supposedly a former defense expert or something. Well, that's fine with me. I'll keep the books here, maybe round down on the gold crafts stocks every once in a while, as long as the fortress still stands.

There's a lot of stuff that needs doing if this fortress is to last more than a few more years, though. First of all, Sankis will have to beat some sense into the farmers and get them to start working. Track down the plump helmet spawn, maybe even scrap the farm and start a new one, that sort of thing.

Once the goblins are taken care of, our dead have to be buried, and there are many. We don't want the ghosts coming back. On that note, I've neglected to build myself a tomb. Sankis can dig out a spot if he likes; if not, when the time comes, he can toss me in with the rest of the rabble. Not like I'd be around to appreciate it, anyway.

Later on, we need to increase our fortress' defenses. More traps is always a good idea. I've started some large-scale excavation a ways down; if we keep digging, we should find some ores we can use to start a metalworks and make our own weapons. Any idle dwarves should be drafted and trained. Some sniper towers would help, if we can train a few marksdwarves.

On the lower-priority stuff, the move to the underground isn't fully finished. Some bedrooms and noble bedrooms, as well as the dining table, remain on the first level. They should be migrated to their new locations (we'll need some more noble bedrooms, too). An out-of-the-way area should be designated to hold all of the extra furniture we have; it's taking up all of our stockpile space. Beds, chairs, and tables can go into deep storage; maybe keep barrels in the farming area; buckets can probably go next to the hospital.

Idle dwarves can also be set to join the stone detailing crew. They should just smooth stone for now; once they get their skills up (legendary), they can start engraving the bedrooms and such.

Here's a map of the fortress as it stands, levels 1-3.

#4 Edited by jesterroyal (390 posts) -



1 of Granite rolls around and I receive my orders from my cousin, the queen. I'm to act as Seneschal of Shimmeroiled until a suitable replacement is found. Whatever.

As a friendly dwarf gives me a tour of the place, I spot a walled workshop in one of the lower levels. “A dwarf went crazy in there. He started taking off of his clothes and crying.” my guide informs me. Dwarves under my reign are to be free to express emotion and not live in clothed tyranny. As my first act, I order the wall opened and the dwarf released.
While on the main level, I start getting some SERIOUS bad vibes. It turns out that some dwarven bros are hurt and trapped in a small hole that a former ruler had channeled. Eager to rid myself of this bad feeling, I order a floor made over the hole so I no longer have to think of them.
Before I arrived there was some business with goblins. They're no longer a problem. Our buddies from the mountain homes chased them off before I could have anything done with them. Probably for the best.
While surveying the outside I'm shocked to learn that we've imprisoned animals in a small pasture. What in Armok's name??? You can't OWN animals, man. I order that our brother beings be freed.
A similar restriction was made for our very own citizens. As if we were living in some sort of military state! I abolish the ordinance.
Before I let them leave, though, there's the matter of food. Our WHOLE FORTRESS is on the verge of starvation. There's only one thing to do. As I let dwarves out of the fortress, I enact a new law.
Every capable man, woman, and child is to head outside and gather up nature's bounty. Not to eat, but to be brought back and shared amongst ourselves. A suitable field is selected and near every citizen leaves to do their new job.
Another issue that proved challenging to previous ruler was drink. Every dwarven man and woman craved the refreshing, natural taste of water. Unfortunately a majority of water outside is unfit for drinking, having been tainted by mud or blood. A portion of the brook outside is diverted into an underground reservoir. A well is created on the floor above, drawing on the new water. Not only is this a much, much more healthy alternative to alcohol but it's not outside where our brothers and sisters were being slaughtered.
While observing, I notice that my plan to feed the fortress (and later the world) is bringing results. Dwarves are see merrily hauling in handfuls of wild strawberries and prickle berries.
It seems that word of our tragedies have spread to the mountainhomes. Word is spreading that we're a cursed fortress doomed to failure. Whatever. That's just, like, their opinion.
While I was outside I had a bold plan. The land near the brook was devoid of any structures. Having built a pump I had the nearby land irrigated. It seemed that the land is too rocky, though. Nothing would grow.
All in all, I think the fortress is in good hands. The next three seasons will be great!!

Update 2 of 2: Summer, Autumn and Winter

Just as soon as Autumn comes do the haunting start. A dead child, among others, reportly rise from the dead to torment those from their past lives. Spooky!
Some other dwarves have informed me that having everyone outside gathering plants is not exactly the best idea. Something about Goblins. Whatever. I was never one for "defense" or "survival." As a compromise, I agree to keep my harvesting to the indoors. I find suitable room and clear it out.
While that's being done, I look to our food supplies. The output is just not enough to feed a fort of sixty dwarves and despite my protests no one will follow through on my ideas of sharing and eating only what you need, not what you think you need. I find a suitable dwarf and assign him to exclusive fertiziler duty. This all natural fertilizer, straight from the teat of our Mother is set to increase our plump helmet output tenfold!
As summer draws to a close I order our miners to seek out natural caverns. Many hundreds of feet below our hold we find one. It's only a matter of time before delicious fungal spores and moss creep up to our living area.
Meanwhile our fertilizer is already producing results! SPLENNNNDID!
With our barely existent military I turn the barracks into a common area.
With autumn drawing to an end, I revist the room I had dug out. Success! Fungus and moss from the caverns below have successfully begun to spread. Soon we will have no need to leave the walls.
Outside, I receive word that an elven trader has gone berserk. He does little harm, except to the mule he came with, before a dwarf cuts him down.
Oh no. Why won't they just leave me alone? We're just, like, minding our own business, you know?
Despite the goblins at our door, things are looking up for the summer
The dwarven caravan inexplicably still has not departed. They deal with the goblins. In the coming days, bodies of missing dwarves and animals are found littering the surrounding countryside. No one bothers bringing the bodies inside and I don't really care.
While I'm busy surveying the outsides, some sort of bird is busy harassing the workers. I am loathe to harm a brother being but I'm left with no choice. The half dozen poorly trained military dwarves are dispatched.
... but not before we lose several to the Elk Bird. Oh well! I'll be sure that every bit of the bird is used so that his death is not in vain.
More Elk Birds?! Apparently my advisors did not properly convey the threat before. A whole flock of the flightless birds had taken residence inside the fort. With a wounded military, I simply order the hall they occupy to be blocked off. Problem solved! Oh, and it turned out that these birds were coming from the cavern. Oops!
Summer came and went. As I dealt with the Elk Bird threat, my miners and masons were hard at work outside. A moat is made and filled and a bridge erected. I've single handedly saved our fortress from more attacks. I continue my work on the colossus.
More goblins appear but are unable to get to us. There is no defense better than a natural defense!
As I'm busy congratulating myself, a kind dwarf points out that we had not taken out the ramps leading to the hills overlooking our majestic fort. I quickly order the ramps taken down but it's too late. The goblins are once again upon us!
I'm exhausted and sick of all this work. I throw down the sceptre of leadership and pick up the hoe of farm life. Someone else can deal with the goblins. I'll be working on my organic farm.
#5 Edited by Shofixti (154 posts) -

FIFTH YEAR - Zombie_Shakespeare

Hullo, fellow Dorfs. Some strange lookin' fellas broke into me home yesterday, abducted me and brought me here to this fort.

I am a humble farmer-Dorf, but these men told me that now I'm a leader-Dorf. That's alright, I suppose. Me mum never taught me much about

leadin', but maybe I can do good and put some of her old-world farming values back into this little fort. She taught me that

the two most precious things in a Dorf's life are liquor and farmin'. I never had no reason to doubt her. She never steered me wrong.

Oh, my name is Tosid. You c'n call me Zombie, though. Me friends started callin' me Zombie when I was little, after an elephant trampled

me head and I got up and just started playin' tag again. The doctors said I'd be a veg'table, but I proved them wrong right good.

Now, I don't know what kind of name Shirremoiled is, but I'll try me darndest to keep these fellas safe an' happy.

They sure rushed me right in. I didn't see much on account o' the sack on my head, but one time we tripped and it came off. Lots o' blood

and dead Dorfs.

Must have been one crazy party. We kept goin' in pretty far, past the entrance. Pretty sure I heard some screams, but the Dorfs with me

told me it was just one big joke welcome for their new overseer. One o' them said somefin about 'account-o-bility', but then the other

one slugged him but good. They took me into the first and told me about how the last overseer did a right bang-up job, but Dorfs are dying

and I could fix it. They asked me what my first order was. I looked all 'round, at how bloody and dirty this room was, and told 'em

to start cleanin' up their mess. Me mum would have a fit if she saw all this. They gave each other a weird look. Then they told me

I should really take care o' the goblins outside, but I told them that the goblins would still be there tomorrow. They said they'd get

the old overseer to help me out.

After scrubbin' on those floors for a while, I told the nearest Dorf that they were hard to clean up, and he suggested that we just make

a new floor over it. I told him that was good, and that he could do it with whatever we had around. I caught him later buildin' tiles to

seal up the blood stains out o' potash. Oh, well. One stain down, when he finishes. Me mum would be proud o' me critical thinking skills.

Then I got reports o' a goblin outside killin' all sorts of poor, innocent animals. I told the Dorf that was sad and all, but I had a fort to run

and these blood stains weren't going to cover themselves up.

Through all o' this, though, the goblins kept killin' people outside. So I told the nearest Dorf that we should just wall up the entrance.

He told me there were Dorfs still outside, but I just said that if they were outside, they must have bad survival instincts anyway, and I

couldn't finish cleaning up this mess with that big racket. So he told me he'd get some Dorfs to bring up some alunite for me.

But soon after that, they were workin' on bringing up the rocks when the yak over in the front went berserk! I shouted for someone to kill it,

and the Equivalence of Cloister squad burst into action. Dodok carried her baby into battle and wrecked it. Then she walked off like nothin' ever

happened. What a lady.

They did so good that I told them to go on and kill the elf who snuck inside during the seige. Me mum hates elves, so I should, too.

After that, I think we c'n get that wall finished and start some clean-up.

And then, somethin' bad happened.


Well, here we are again, fellow Dorfs.

I had someone check outside, and when he came back, he told me that he took a look 'round outside and saw a bunch o' Elves and Goblins

still hangin' out. Some o' our Dorfs are out there, too. A couple o' children, too. Then he collapsed and died from all the arrows in his spine.

I had someone tuck him in the corner and then told them to go get the stone for the wall. In the mean-time, good ol' Dodok took her baby back

over to the front entrance and broke all the Elf's limbs. Then she passed out from all the pain of having her right arm pulped.

One o' the other past overseers, Davey, also took out the fight and beat the piss out o' a Goblin pikeman.

Then he took a nice long nap outside on the ground.

Someone told me that beefy girl Dodok is also 'chief medical Dorf'. That sounds bad. She's pretty not awake right now, and new

Dorfs be comin' in every few minutes with their guts hangin' out right good. Seein' as how most the Gobbos were gone at this point,

I told my team they could go ahead and nix out on the big wall I told 'em to build. They seemed happy with that. I must be a

natural leader! Other than that, the rest of the yaks got real mad. Some o' the Goblins came in a while ago and killed some o' them,

so I think they're just lonely. I went and cuddled with one for a while, until he headbutted me in the face and tried to trample me.

Then some Dorf came over and showed him a real bad time.

He got up after a while, though.

(BoG, Sankis, Davey, Seaborgium and I are at this point all alive, and except for Davey (who is just sleepy), entirely healthy, as far as I can tell)

And then a spooky ghost appeared just outside! I think he was tellin' me somethin', but I was too busy cleanin' up those bloodstains to really

listen all proper-like. A bunch o' children started runnin' around him in circles, which I thought was nice. They weren't scared o' playin'

with a good Dorf just 'cause he died from a decent skull smashin'. I told one of me Dorfs to put his body in the garbage pile out front later.

Then I remembered about all the other corpses outside. I told them to go ahead and do them, too. After that, a Gobbo came back in from outside.

It didn't seem too smart to me, since he got cut down in about five seconds. Him and a buddy.

Then someone came and told me that a new Gobbo, name o' Dangspespo came in lookin' for children to steal! I told him that was right fine,

since I never liked kids ever since Urist from next door grabbed me by my beard and made me dance naked for the other children.

What was I sayin'? Oh, yeah. I told Dodok that since she's got doctorin' to do, she can take a break from killin' and go do some o' that.

She liked that just fine. I put that fine Sankis fella in her spot, and promoted one o' the other Dorfs to captain o' the Cloisters, since

Vucar, the old one, was dyin' in a pretty painful lookin' way, with his toes oozin' and all. Watchin' them Dorfs crawl all over the place movin'

piles o' corpses was comfortin'. I knew all those Dorfs were at peace, except the ones that weren't.

It went great until ol' Deduk, a Dorf who was just haulin' most o' the time, snapped and started yellin' and screamin' and makin' all

kinds of noise. Then he tackled Bim and punched him so hard that his liver popped. By then, Catten had gotten there, and he chopped Deduk's

legs off and then went and did some fishin' for a while while Bim bled out on the floor next to him.

Someone told me we'd lost about 10 Dorfs, all in all, in the Gobbo siege. That seemed okay to me. Me mum hates it when it's crowded.

Over the next few weeks, Lorbam created masterpieces, but he always seemed to tuck 'em behind his back when I came to look.

Davey drank a lot every time he saw a ghost, and Sankis always had "somethin' else to do" whenever I asked him to help me clean.

Seaborgium found a lot of corpses out and about in the wilderness outside the fort, and BoG was...BoG. He gives me the creeps. I

don't think he likes that I startin' callin' him 'bawg'.

After a few more weeks, I noticed some Dorf named Edem across the moat. Same name as me mum. He waved and told me there was no way across,

and that he would really like some food. So I went back inside. Never did see that fella again.

No migrants showed up, either. I wouldn't want to come to a fort covered in so much blood that you can see it from the mountains.

Then ol' Olin died from infection. Dorfs flooded in to take his socks. Vucar is still alive, somehow.

On the 15th Felsite, some Elfy folk showed up with a big wagon and got real confused lookin' at our moat. Then some more Gobbos tried to

ambush us from across the moat. I decided they could duke it out themselves, between the two groups of 'em. They kinda just stared at each

other until the Goblins chased down and killed some stray cats and the couplo' Dorfs that never made it back in the fort. I'm sure they

managed to work out their differences with the Elves.

After that, one o' me advisors encouraged that I somehow put the ghosts roaming the fort to rest. They were makin' some Dorfs very

unhappy. So I told him to work up some slabs of stone that we could put engravin's on. He seemed to like that idea just fine.

After gettin' a new manager in the office (Sankis was always lazin' about), I had him set the orders for the slabs and then set to work on

a bridge. Ever since the two Dorfs that got caught outside died to those nasty Gobbos, I thought it might be nice. Between that and migrants,

my advisors say I'm the smartest Dorf ever, just like me mum used to. I took some of our gold nuggets, had them smelted down

and built the drawbridge out of that. Here's where the lever is.

But some bad news is that migrants arrived 'fore I finished the bridge. Or one, anyway. Then more Gobbos came and wiped 'em up. I felt bad.

Might be time I finally get a break from leading the fort. Even if only for a few hours. Don't know how long these Dorfs'll last without me.


Alright, here's what I have at the moment. Some not good stuff is happening in Shimmeroiled. I'm not sure I can hold it together for almost six more months.

Welp, it's me again, fellas. I got to sit down for almost ten minutes this time. Then someone screamed at me and I got back up and back to work.

Those Gobbos are bein' nice an' patient while I finish up the bridge. One o' dem smiled at me, and I smiled back real wide-like. Then he

started eatin' the corpse of the cat they killed out there last month.

Thob finally got 'round to startin' on the bridge, but he took one look at the Gobbos on the other side and ran away, back into the fort.

I guess some things you just have to do yourself. I tried, anyway, but then one o' the Gobbos threw a big stick at me and started laughin',

laughin' just like Urist used to laugh at me. So I shouted, I shouted at him, "You havin' a laugh? You havin' a laugh at me?" And then I

laughed right back at him. I don't think he liked that. Suspended bridge construction until they starve to death.

A week later, the Gobbos finally got bored and left. Never stopped starin' at me, though. Real uncomfortable. Could tell from all the way

down by the still. BoG is throwin' a party, but only him, Sankis and Davey showed up. That don't sound real fun to me, so I just went to check

on the stone slabs for engravin'.

A human caravan came, but they took one look at all the Dorf corpses, rivers of blood and the impassable moat and turned right around.

I waved as they left. No one waved back. I was a little disappointed. At least Thob finally finished that bridge, the day after. Maybe

next time migrants come in, we can have them sit in for a bit before they see how horrible things is here and take off. I miss me mum.

I lowered down the bridge so the other Dorfs could get a nice taste o' the outside for a while, and then an ambush force o' Gobbos

came in right that second. I sent the Cloisters after 'em. Then they all turned inta doors. Wait, did I imagine that? Must've.

Catten sighed at me when I sprinted out across the bridge to start collectin' stray cat teeth from where the last group o' Gobbos

knocked 'em out right good from that poor kitten. But he grabbed his stuff and went out to kill some Greenies. And...well, he put

up a brave fight, that he did. Rest in peace, chum. Dodok got real angry when all this happened, came out and killed two Gobbos single-handed.

Then the humans from the caravan showed up again, I guess for the Gobbos. They put a real quick end to the rest of them out there.

Just wish they'd been a bit quicker for Imush, Zuglar, Minkot, maybe Sibrek and big, strong Catten. We lost a lot o' good Dorfs this day.

Dodok dropped her weapons and everyone started to get back to their normal routines, when Goblins came back to the fort.

This was gettin' real old. We couldn't take much more o' these Goblins interferin' with our day-to-day. No one had hooked up the bridge to

the lever, yet. I couldn't even trap them out. I removed Dodok from the Cloisters again and told the surviving military to get out there

and die protecting their home. Maybe I could've left out part of that, but they all looked pretty depressed anyhow. I hoped those humans

would still help us. Kol was already a goner, just from where he was when the Gobbos showed up.

As Dodok, her baby, Etur, Vucar and Endok were slaughtered outside helplessly, Kogsak, a simple hauler-Dorf was possessed. The humans struggled

this time to chase away the Gobbos. The Dorfs around here are used to tragedy. Only 27 of us now. I sent someone to finish hookin' up

that lever. I think I'm going to close off the outside until we get some migrants. If we get some migrants. It's Autumn now.

One o' the Goblins wandered into the fort and had his spine broken by a rock trap. He can't move. I don' know what to do with him.

We're goin' to need more slabs to engrave. A lot more.

Tired o' seein' this Gobbo in my fort, I walked after him as he started limpin' away, at last. I grabbed him and tore his ear off, then beat him

to death right good with my shield. I see brains. Me mum would be proud.


Davey is miserable. He keeps throwin' fits, and I can't do much about it. Maybe we have to put him down for

the safety of the other Dorfs. I'll watch him for now. No one's willing or maybe no one's free to hook up the

bridge yet. Don't know why that's happenin'. I told some other people that they were mechanics now, but they

don't want to. We have the supplies.

I took a walk out on the grounds to clear me head, and found something pretty bad outside that I must'o missed

just after the last Gobbo skirmish.

RIP in peace, buddy. Maybe someday that statue'll get real tall.

Some nice chap finally hooked up the lever for me after I started pointin' at every Dorf who walked through the

room and shouting at them to do it for me. I don' really know how that mechanical stuff works. I just like farmin'

and drinkin'.

Davey had another fit and a ghost went and hung out with him until he calmed down and went to sleep. I don' think he

liked that much. He was cryin'. I finally gave the order to start engravin' all those slabs we have. I'm real tired.

I don't think I'm much cut out for this overseer stuff. But the human caravan finally left, and we got in some new Dorfs

that I can put to work. If nothin' else, they can haul in the corpses before I close up the bridge. I don' think we can

survive with all these Gobbos for much longer. But they haven't been 'round in a couple o' weeks, at least. Maybe

they're gone?

I made some o' the new Dorfs chief medical Dorf and broker, since they all had some talent.

I have a real bad feelin' for some reason. No idea what it's for. Like me senses are warnin' me against somethin'.

Maybe it already happened? I c'n just shake it off. Need to focus on putting them ghost Dorfs to rest this month.

It's not gonna be a real fun time for me engravers.

Everyone was real excited to meet the new people. BoG and Id, the only two other than Davey that are still alive

from when the fort was founded, are ecstatic now. Davey's still real sad. I'm worried about him. I think he

misses Sankis. We still find bodies from time to time as we enter th' month o' Sandstone.

Davey threw another tantrum today. I'm thinkin' o' sealin' him in his room before he hurts someone. It'd be a

real shame, but maybe it'd keep the fort safe from his hissy fits.

The humans left behind a couple'o merchants and a yak. They went insane today. I think they started killin' each other,

but I couldn't watch because Kogsak, the possessed Dorf from a while back went stark raving mad, too. He stripped naked

and then ran around screaming and crying. He gave me a hug. One of the humans ran away from the insane yak, and the other

one just got sad and sat down next to it. They're just starin' at each other now. No one wants to get near them, but

they're interruptin' a lot o' work.

After a while o' this, I sent the Cloisters to kill them both, like a good overseer would. One o' the new migrants came and killed

them both. It turns out, the yak still had a lot o' trade items on it, so we took those into the fort. Lots o' logs, cheese

and good stuff. I'm scared the humans will come back for us now.

It's Timber now. We've seen no Gobbos for over a month. I think we scared them off! It's a happy day in the fort for all

the Dorfs still alive. We're still cleanin' up the corpses of friends, alright, but we might not have to do any more.

We have food, alcohol, beds and everything we need to survive the winter.

An outpost liason came from...

Someplace. We ignored them.

Kogsak, Rith and Davey are all pretty upset. I'm tryin' to help them out, but it's hard. Almost like they want to be upset.

Though Kogsak is just insane at this point. Maybe that's why the others are upset?

I talked to Rith. Her baby and brother died last month, and the baby is haunting her. That sounds bad. I'm gonna to get some

more slabs to engrave. Like I thought, Davey was upset about Sankis.

I set up some more jobs for the idle Dorfs, and everything was looking up. Then the Gobbos came back on the 16th Timber.

I just sent the Cloisters out to -


Kadol was outside. He was the first one down. I managed to get off the alert in time to stop anyone else from dyin'. We're

sealed inside now. The bridge is up. I'm not lowerin' it any time soon and exposin' my Dorfy comrades to that kind'o violence


I watched the Gobbos from just outside o' the fort. Eventually, another group o' them came and they all charged the Dorf liason

and his buddies. One of the Dorfs got real weird, twitchin' and what-not, and he killed almost all of them by himself. Then the liason

left. What a weird bunch o' Dorfs. They left right around the time it turned to winter. It's Moonstone now.

Dorfs are startin' to cheer up. Maybe we can still make it.

Three more months. Here we go.


Nothin' seems likely to happen at the momen'. Ev'rybody is workin' on projects, engravin' slabs and making more,

farmin' and sleepin' and brewin' and drinkin'. I've been followin' around Kogsak, makin' sure he don't hurt nobody.

He seems harmless, but he's scarin' some o' the children. I thought about sealin' him up like I wanted to do

with Davey durin' his tantrums, but that seemed mean. After two weeks, he died on his feet. Just dropped dead

just like that. I hope I don't go out that way. I miss home.

I took Kogsak out to the corpse pile meself. Didn't want no one else to have to.

At least he's not hauntin' us.

Moonstone's almost over. Thought I saw Sankis today. Must'o been my mind playin' tricks.

Amost's been possessed, same as Kogsak was. I hope he doesn't go out the same way. Maybe he can help him, though

we couldn't help Kogsak. He went over and claimed a Jeweler's workshop and started haulin' over materials. I'm

followin' him to see what he does. He took lots o' gems and some gold nuggets. He's been working for a week now.

It's been a week and a half. He must have everything he needs, 'cause he's started workin' on somethin' big.

He finally came out o' the workshop, cacklin' and sweatin'. He held up a big, shiny green ring. It's real pretty.

But I've always been a man'o function. He let me look at it. He carved a picture of a mug onto it. I guess he likes

drink as much as the rest'o Dorf-kind. He calls it 'The Entrancin' Theater'. I don't understand it, but I'm glad he's

okay. I told him he could do whatever he wants with it.

A kid named Astesh came and talked to me on the 12th Opal. He told me about how his dad died and is haunting him.

He said he was really tired but his dad kept him awake, and he was scared his dead brother was going to come back

for him too. I gave him some ale and told him I'd take care of it.

People are looking at me funny, like they don't like me no more. I'm a little scared.

All I could really do was add his names to the engravin' schedule. Maybe it'll work out. I hope he doesn't go crazy.

We have enough crazy Dorfs already.

Seaborgium told me today that he's been makin' all our logs into ash for about six months. We don't got any left now.

Saw Sankis again. He waved. Waved back. Think I'm finally losin' it. Little over a month till the end of the year.

Don't know what we're doin' next year. Haven't seen no one from outside in ages. Rimtar's been luggin' around a stone chair

for about three months.

It's the 27th Opal. A liason came from wherever. Thob went to meet with him and talk about the fort. I left the meetin'

early to go sit down and close my eyes for a while. Thob came by and told me later that he asked 'em to bring some wood,

peacocks and extra plump helmet seeds. Told him it was fine. Slept for a day.

It's Obsidian now. Year's almost up. Lot o' idlers around, but I can't think of enough jobs to give 'em. At least they

have some down-time. Still, we have a lot o' drink, a lot o' food, and enough beds for all the Dorfs around. No Gobbos

in a while.

When I woke up on the 27th Obsidian, me room was pitch black. I fumbled around for a while before I could find the door,

but it was locked. Pounded on it for a while. No one answered. No one let me out. I don't know how long it's been.

Someone must have jammed it right good, 'cause I can't get it open at all. Tried kicking me way out, but there's not

enough space to do it right. Startin' to get real hungry. I guess maybe I wasn't a popular overseer. This is what I

thought about doin' to Davey and Kogsak. Very thirsty. Still no light. Gave up tryin' to get out. Should be Spring by now.

Can hear Sankis sometimes. And Kogsak. Dorden and all the other Dorfs that died.

I want to go home. Maybe just take a nap instead.

End of year 5.

#6 Edited by Shofixti (154 posts) -


Envane's Turn Update 1

What can i say , I remember scouting this location for the Mountainhome many years ago , It seemed like a very promising location filled with gold and obsidian and other dwarfly delights.

So you can understand my shock and disdain upon arrival , I knew there was problems with goblins and management kept changing hands each year due to the high stress of the position , but i didnt expect THIS MUCH BLOOD!

Corpses everywhere , an entire field stained with blood , and people puking in nestboxes.

at least the owners seemed to have a sense of humor , at the front gates stood a massive statue of what appeared to be a decapitated dwarf .. turns out it was just something the mysterious "sankis" had been working on , before he met his untimely end. I ordered a slab engraved in his honor , and placed it in the crotch of his creation , I thought of making it a memorial room , but apparently all the idle dwarves that could fit in sankis's crotch turned up instantaneously , although humorous i figured it was a bit unwise to have a meeting location so close to the gates.

Strangely enough , the majority of the living residents seemed pretty happy and content with their confinement within the burrows. I assessed the situation and since there appeared to be no goblins i allowed everyone out of the burrows and the fortress whirred into action.

I noticed out severe lack of wood , (who in their right mind made 2 dining rooms full of wooden tables and chairs. By Armok! we have obsidian and gold up the wazoo... So i made the judgement call to open the bridge and order some wood to be chopped , and for it to be hastily moved back inside , and off they went.

Shortly after lowering the bridge , we were greeted by some more eager migrants either too dumb,brave,or greedy to ignore the warnings. They showed little aptitude so i decided that they would become the new masons we needed to finish Sankis's Statue .

I had not got to know the dwarves very much by this point , but apparently we have been delegating some work to children. This seems to have worked well, and Vucar a child-mason , came up with some sort of insane plan and snuck off and claimed a workshop, I myself have never witnessed such a moody child, but im sure this fortress has aged him more than most children.

Well I cant say i haven't seen stranger things . theres something about the quality of work that makes the spikes look more enticing than menacing , and the image of a bin makes the industrial dwarf inside me want to store myself snugly within it.

For now things seem calm , ill maintain the military in order to stave off any more goblin threats , but i should be safe to gather more wood and build a new trade depot. Ive also designated some extensive mining , in particular im looking for hematite , and PLEASE ARMOK PLEASE something to make coke with , lest i burn all the wood for charcoal hehe. ive also started a grand chamber above our current layer to A. requistion more gold and obsidian , and B. build an opulent set of quarters for myself to reward myself for the toils yet to come , I shall take up the pick myself ad begin digging , i shall report in some months time.

End of part 1

Hehe , i sort of slackly rewrote this post as i stupidly closed the window earlier while weriting the first version , ... wow .. i clearly saw alot of evidence of goblins , but so far things have been super peaceful , i even let the elk birds out to cage them for a bit of excitement , which it really wasnt , i think ill try and get us some marksdwarves atraining , have plenty of bones :D

Envane's Turn Update 2 of 3

What can i say , Alot of stuff has happened since i last reported , we had a bunch of new migrants , we had seen hide nor hair of the goblin menace until the blasted elves turned up and i opened the bridge to trade with them , as i was desperate to put Seaborgium up to the task of becoming a broker. As soon as the bridge was lowered , we had reports of 2 goblin master thieves who had spied us unloading the goods.

The dwarves scattered , mostly making it inside , i scurried the military into action , then as the elves came closer to the depot , multiple ambush parties attacked! , they were more concerned with the elves and luckily chased them around for a while giving the military time to assemble at the bridge. Davey proved extremely lucky as he was caught outside and had chosen to run around the goblins the long way , i was worried for a bit but he was a hardy miner and was able to make it back in time before the scuffle broke out.

Run Davey run !

Unfortunately For us and for the dwarves in the military , I had not inspected them other than witnessing them sparring , I did not expect them to get EVISCERATED by the thieves. Wrists were slashed , thighs were cut and in a few moments 3 out of 4 members of the squad were either bleeding to death or immobilized. They had forgotten to don full armor and only one of them was carrying a weapon. Luckily it was the brave Sibrek , who charged at them with his bronze battle axe and cleaved ones head off and sent the other flying into the moat ,which struggled underwater for a while then drowned. Sibrek was over-exerted afterwards and retired to the hospital , leaving the elves to their doom which was swift. However they managed to chase off enough goblins before dying that only a few made it to the gates and were promptly hit in the head with rocks . We were victorious but at the cost of our entire active military except for Sibrek who must have been extremely depressed , as he went missing and was later found drowned in the well. Perhaps he wanted to fight the master thief once more.

Thats why i stick to wine.

Reeling from the attack , Thob , the mayor , Mandated the crafting of quivers. That got me set on establishing a real military. I drafted 4 dwarves who showed aptitude already for the crossbow and built them an archery range and updated the barracks. The mayor then forbid the export of coffins , which had been mass produced to meet the sudden demand. I assured him they were all needed for our own dead as I established what ended up being several large memorial chambers and mausoleums.

In an effort to get a military trained fast i turned to dwarven science. I ordered a room to be filled to the brim with wooden training spears protruding from every surface. They were then linked to a lever enabling them to be triggered and reset repatedly. While i was busy gathering iron and smelting it and creating armor and weapons for a few small squads , I had "Zombie" volunteer to be the test dwarf for the program , as he had only recently been exhumed from his own locked room , he didnt object to being locked into a new room. Seaborgium was happy to operate the lever while zombie spent a good day or 2 being poked by spears. We decided to let him out when he got hungry unsure of the results. He strode out deftly flexing his muscles and gave a little demonstration on dodging and swung his axe around his head in a manner only a legendary axedwarf would. Great Success!

As the equipment for more squads was created , more participants were selected , i soon had 3 legendary squads ready for action , which was quite soon. A human caravan arrived and another attempt to teach Seaborgium the appraisal skill with it. I sent out the Marksdwarves to defend from across the moat as the inevitable ambush party descended upon the caravan.

Embarrassingly , the marksdwarves had only brought their training bolts and proceeded to waste them rapidly to no effect. Thankfully the humans knew how to defend themselves and made it to the depot mostly intact so I sent the marksdwarves back in dejectedtly to gather the correct ammo while the melee squads eagerly rushed to meet their new challengers. Despite a few minor injuries , the dwarves struck terror into the goblins and decimated their 3 seperate ambush parties driving off or decapitating them across the entire field. We surely collected the debt of blood owed to us by the goblins that day.

Along with our victory , Seaborgium had ample time to learn his brokerage , trading oodles of obsidian trinkets we had made , i eagerly awaited the dwarves , and made sure the military was intact and left them to their own training schedules once more , practicing their orginizational skills and tactics that cant be poked into you . I will return to the mines , we shall soon have a sizeable amount of steel , the only thing holding us back is the rate at which we gather wood , I wont be surprised if we anger the elves because it looks like we will need each and every tree in this area.

Continuing construction projects include Sankis's statue, a water wheel power generator for magma pump operation, and more mining,dumping,smoothing and hauling, than you can possibly have dwarven nightmares about.

I must rest for a while before we greet our dwarven buddies that shall surely arrive soon to trade, .. until then , please dont drown in the well.

Envane's Turn update 3 of 3

As expected , Autumn brought with it more migrants and the dwarven caravan, which we were eager to trade with . Apparently there had been a liaison hiding in a tree on the edge of our clearing for the past year or so already, awaiting his rescue by another caravan. As the traders unloaded at the depot, so too came the goblins , sending in their stealthy thieves to try to breach our defenses , But this time we were more than ready.

The marksdwarves rained bolts along with the caravan guards as zombie and his axedwarves did what they do best , cleave heads clean off. Its probably unwise to fight so close to the bridge however as by the end of this season of blood, we had a dozen corpses floating beneath the bridge. The newfound military success seemed to inspire one of our dwarves into a fey mood , in which he crafted an astounding green glass weapon rack. He was a bit dejected when i told him it was too good to actually be used as a weapon rack, nevertheless it would make a good decoration.

As autumn wound up, we prepared for the long winter. As had become a tradition in the fort, I was being relived of my dutys at the end of the year. I must say i had alot more work to do , but only so little time , so we doubled down efforts and began the mass hauling and busywork that i had left undone. We gathered up as much wood as possible . Finished sankis's statue albeit with a rush of random stone that was as close as possible, I'm sure he wouldn't mind it looking a bit patchy. I also had constructed over the year a power generator using water wheels, unfortunately i had no real use for the power apart from routing it to the workshops to power some millstones which i still haven't ordered to be placed. But it still looked impressive. I ordered a series of steel corkscrews made to facilitate a future magma pump or device along those lines.

Those boards dont work on water UNLESS YOU GOT POWER

Much more grand in design is the grand chambers i have been digging and smoothing for the entire time I have been here , id like to fill it with a zoo and possible more things but even the most diligent dwarf can only wor so much. Regardless behold my royal chambers and the grand combined statue garden and dining hall alongside the swanky new barracks and archery ranges.

As Winter rolled by we were granted one last spot of entertainment , Kobolds!. As we were letting the drawbridge up because we expected no visitors in the wintertime, apparently we disturbed the kobold ambush party that was hiding right next to it

They mostly dead within the minute.

That was the last significant event during my leadership , i retired as a leader and went back to mining. I look forward to prosperity to come, barring an unforeseen disaster Shimmeroiled shall become a grand mountainhome.

Heres the final "score"

The marksdwarves became hammer lords fyi

And according to the figures , we are clean out of meat and fish , we have several massive stockpiles of prepared meals however , and SO MUCH WINE.. if anything we need to focus on breeding some meat worthy animals , or hunting more often..

#7 Edited by jesterroyal (390 posts) -


UPDATE 1 Granite 1 58

I have been here a while slaving over my metalwork, SO MUCH GOLD! and yet NO ONE USES!! Yeah yeah! The massive row of statues outside! How obvious. All this hard work of mine just sitting around doing nothing! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH EFFORT I PUT INTO THOSE GOLD BARS!!! FOR THAT QUALITY TO JUST HAVE THEM SITTAROUND AND THOSE MUCKY KIDS PLAY ON THEM!!!


So when the last leader of our fort tripped over their own feet and was then declared not the right Dwarf for the job. I was thrown the responsibility.

Immediately I put that gold to work! I was wonder what I could do...then I remembered....I always thought that monument to Sankis was allways.....a little....disappointing.

Thus the Sankis project was to be enhanced!!

Time passes, nothing happens project comes along. Then MIGRANTS!!!.....turns was just one guy and he just stayed out in the field looking at the fort.

Dont blame him. The Sankis monument is a sight to be hold....UNTILL I AM FINISHED WITH IT!!! IT SHALL STAND PROUDER THAN EVER BEFOR!!!!!

Alot of times passes and its spring.

A ghost appears in the barracks.....there is so many bodies around I dont know who it could be. I found a body in the water under the well....cant be good for us.

A Dwarf is taken by a Fey mood and takes to the Crafts workshop hostage.

Two men during the construction of the enhancement to Sankis monument are trapped...didnt notice for a week or so. They got hungry and thirsty. Plans were set to free them.

AN AMBUSH!!! Send the army!!!

Another ambush? Oh no...that poor dwarf. Oh well TO THE DANGER ROOM EVERYONE!!!

Is that my fellow Dwarfs? Or is that a band of Migrants? Whoever they are those Goblins are going to fight them after they killed the poor dwarf.

DONT WORRY GUYS!! Rith just made us an Gelan earring! That will save us from the Goblins!!! Stupid fey moods!! I might have been able to do somthing with it if he made it out of gold but no....

Amongst the battle was Merchants. They were absolutely peppered with Arrows. They took cover behind their yaks...until they fell over.

One brave miner of ours was caught by some goblins. Swing their Pickaxe and killed a few even cut off one of the goblins hands. However they were overwhelmed and crawled into a pond and died.

That Dwarfs actions can be see engraved on the floors for the first meal hall. Next to the engraveing of someone who died of dehydration the year before I took over.

Many months pass by. More abushes that either go away or killed Merchants. The project is finished and.....oh great what does Seaborgium want!? I was about to sick the Death squad on them. Untill someone told me he isnt going to attack anyone....we think.

He made a Scepter? Put it on the pile!! We have plenty as is!!!

Time goes by some more. I set up a Tomb for Sankis and room in the enhancement of his monument. As I spent alot of my year building the enhancement. I decided I too would set up a room and my final resting place a level below Sankis.

I have worked too close to project. I cannot express its awe in truer words. I shall leave someone else to gaze in awe and find their emotions give them the words to describe it.

Also.....I didnt do much except set the entire first floor of the fort to be Smoothed or engraved. We have a bunch of Gold Sarcophagi aaaaaaaand...........I am tired. I am going to sleep in my golden room. It is Granite 1 59.

PS I could have gone into more detail about stuff and made things even more grander. However I felt for what was there I would just be talking nonse. However I was trying to gather together enough of somthing to make a slight mundane task epic, with a video and such. However It would take too long and Shofixti has been josen to get a go for along time. Didnt want to deprive him too much. I cant wait for the 3D work.

PSS another reason why I didnt do too grand a job. It will take me a while to sort out spelling errors. Let alone if anything makes sense.

#8 Edited by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

EIGHTH YEAR - Shofixti

Ahem, I've been told I must keep a record of me year and suchlike, well this here is that and I feel it's only in the spirit of fairness that I introduce meself properlike:

Me name's Shofixti. I'm but a humbledwarf who was unlucky enough to stumble into a drunk dwarf one night who gone and told me tales of a distant settlement where the very walls were laced with gold and a hard workin' dwarf like meself could make his mark on the world.

He didn't mention nothin about no Goblins or blood stained fields or graveyard the size of the king's beard.

Course by the time I finnaly got round to braving the bright overhead and I made the trip here from the mountainhomes, I found meself with hardly any choice other than to stick around now didn't I? The other option as I see it would be to wander outside and let one of them Gobbos stick a few sharp things in me.

Damned Gobbos.

After livin' a few years in this light forsaken hell-hole as mayor and seein no other gentledwarves step up to rule after ol Akyho stepped down, I somehow got shouldered with the weight of this whole settlement.

Arnok save us all.

Bein' the mayor was easy... Me, I just went and yelled at folks whenever I felt we needed somethin' or didn't partcularly needed somethin'. I've no idea how to manage the lives of these Dwarves! Hell, me old wound I got from the Gobbos back in 56 means I can barely hold a scepter! How do they expect me to rule with nary a scepter!

At any rate, I should mention one complaint to the higher-dwaves who end up readin' these logs... Our last leader horribly defaced the great statue to Sankis by adding solid gold oversized male genitalia to it... I believe he set hiself up with his own personal quarters inside of the 'orrible eyesore.

Bloody disrespectful if ya ask me.

I'll be takin' the next little while to farmiliarize meself with the fortress i've called home all these years. If they expect me tah rule it, I may as well know where everythin' is.

Letter 2, Slate the 2nd

This fort is a bloody mess. No ands if nor buts about it!

Me, I went n' spent me whole first month just lookin' round the fort and gettin' tah know the whats-wheres. I made more than a few interestin' discoveries along the way! For instance, I didna know we had goblins caged up along the front gates! (I suspect this was for tha best, as I do so like sticking stabby things in Gobbos)

We also have Eagles (?!) a Gecko, a few Elk Birds (Dear Arnok I hate those things almost as much as I hate tha Gobbos!) and a Tiger.

I'd also like ta point out that we now 'ave us a red carpet o sorts leading right to the gates of Shimmeroiled!

The smarterdwarves tell me it's not actually blood any more, jus' mud. But I sure as shit don't see the difference. 'n them walls are definitely coated in Gobbo blood. More or less permanently methinks.

And so it is that every bloomin creature what looks upon our fair fort is greeted firs' by Sankis's dick, n' second by the welcome mat o' blood. Gold specked halls of paradise my ass!

Though' me, I must admit, it is a might impressive. Go n' imagin' an entire field of golden grass, taller than meself is high, and rising admist that a hill o stone an' grass, laced with thick lines of solid gold.

Somethin' the others havna mentioned is the golden wooden grass what covers the ground!

Our fair forts seen it's fair share o' good leaderdwarfship, in fact I canna very well improve on where we be now. Safe, in our lil' Ellhole. But I spose it's me job to do just that! An' so I must try.

To start er off, I consider meself a clothingist. I believe in clothin' I do. So I've set up a lil detachment in the workshop area where tha' fair industry will exist in our fort. Do I know how to make clothing? Hell no! But it canna be that hard, aye?

On me way to do jus' that, I saw one of the ghostfolks flying about in a wall.

Note: Ghosts are a everyday part of Shimmeroilian life. Most Dwarves wont think twice on seeing one.

I went n' said Hi to the fellow, we chatted for a time. Hope he has a good day that one!

After settin' up somethin' called a loom, n' puttin together a clothiers shop or two, I found out somethin' about the farmers round here... They all mus' be as blind as a bat, as stupid as a gobbo, or as full of complaints as me wife. (Arnok bless her). Every single bloody day I find meself with a new farmer, some of them naught but childfolk, askin' me where the bloody plump helmet spawn is. "IT'S IN THA BAGS LITTERED AT YER FEETS YA NUMBSKULLS!" i'll normally say and they'll go and take them anyway, and then sure enough next day it's the same bloody thing.

It makes me blood boil it does. So I built a single barrel, and went and told them all only tah put seeds in it.

This will work fine n' good till somebody gits' the bright idea to put a bag of seeds in ere' Then anyone who looks in the barrel will think to themselves: "Oh. It's only a bag! I dun' want to plant a bag. I guess were out of seeds again!" Bloody baffoons, them farmers.

The only other big thing I dun and went to work on is what i'm callin' the safecave.

The Safecave is me brainchild. Quite proud o' her... When she's done, she'll be safe, 'ave plenty of water, farmable spots, alchohol facilities, an' maybe a few bedrooms. Enough to keep a few dwarves cozy for awhile while hell breaks loose above em'.

About the end of tha month, a brave soul gone and showed up on our fortress! Fresh blood, and a spinner tah boot! Tha clothingist inside o me rejoiced, but then I noticed somethin' was wrong.

He just stood there, staring at the partial skeleton of some woodsdwarf.

An' stood there.

An' stood there.

A week later, he's still standin' there a staring.

I figured he must be one o them retards, like the farmerfolk...

But then I sat down and put the ol' thinker to work thinkin'. See, It done occured to me that there was a reason the Gobbo's can't come in... So maybe that's why this brave dwarf couldna? It makes sense! So I asked Davey, as he was loitering nearby, and he went n' tol me that I needed tah pull up somethin' called a drawbridge. Now I aint never heard of no bridge that can draw, but I went n' did as he told me tah and pulled the lever.

Arnok! With the bridge down was there ever a commotion! Dwarves started fleeing out of tha fortress in droves! And immigrants kept coming in by tha cartfulls. It's madness! And I hope I can coax the simplefolk back inside before somethin sour happens.

Turns out there were more o' them retards behind tha first retard.

That's about it fer now. It ain't much and may be awfully borin' just describin the mundane like I find meself doin' but I spose that's part of me job now aint it?

(Sidenote: I'm sorry I was only able to play a month so far, life is crazy right now with school around the corner. More to follow soon I hope! And covering more ground than just a month)

Letter 3

The battle for Shimmeroiled was about to begin but I couldna convince all of the members of the military to show up. Apparently they'd rather be drinkin' or sleepin' at a time like this. No matter! With the croc killers back, we were ready to begin. The Lever was pulled, and the orders were givin' an' the men once again' marched across the blood-stained path past the bridge but this time we werenah running away bleedin' from the Gobbos, this time we were takin' the fight to them!

The first shots were fired by our marksdwarves, the Archery practice really showin' through.

I may not seem like i'm a smartdwarf, but I have a way with battle, I do, an' I kept our close fighters at bay for a spell while the marksmen did their job. It was beautiful it was, our boys were pickin' them off at a huge distance an' they couldna even get close enough to loose a solitary arrow back. But they kept comin, that big ol' spider soakin' up arrows like a sponge... Eventually though, it fell, and then another gobbo, and then another...

Finally, they went n' broke rank! They were like movin' cactus they were... So full of bolts. I'm afraid they left quite tha trail of blood behind them as they went n' ran fer their lives but not bein' elves we hardly care about such things.

The sight o Greenskins fleein' in terror from us Dwarves... Now that's a sight i'd been waitin' a long ol time ta see.

We won. Could hardly believe it but we did! and with not even a single scratch on our troops to boot. It was a good ol' day.

Envane, ever the leadertype, decided to throw a party the instant the last o' the Gobbos was out of sight... An' what a party it was. It fer sure felt good to really be in control o' our lands.

Time went on from this day pretty uneventfully... Me? I figure the Goblin's what got out alive told all their cousins we weren't so fun to be slaughterin' anymore. They left us in peace fer months after that battle. Ahhh... It makes me wanna shed a tear...

I'm afraid I dunna have much else tah report about the fortress for the months after that. My lil' project the "safecave" goes on as planned... I'm workin' on all the irragational stuff fer that with the advice of the wise ol' dwarves who know of such magic. It's gunna have some basic workshops, a farm plot so we can eat, a still so we can git stone drunk, food stores to last fer awhile an' some nice places to eat sleep an' shit, just so any dwarf can forget about the hell above in comfort. Oh! And I'm workin' on a system that could permanently cut us off from the fortress, even if some ol dwarf or a particularly insane ruler tries to say otherwise. Just in case, ya know?

I'd like to learn how our training room works so that I may teach meself to be as strong and capable a fighter as the monsters what I see come out of the room, but such a thing will needta wait till I have me some spare time.

Everybody 'round these parts are so happy. Parties seem to be a constant thing, jus like in me dwarfschool days... I was at one an' happened to glance at tha guest list, when I saw this:

What kinda cruel world do we live where a Dwarf canna attend a party jus' because of a little bit of unconscious? I went to track the poor blighter down jus' tah see if I canna cheer him up and give 'im a beer. It took me awhile but eventually I found the poor soul, turns out he was a prisoner in our dungeon. I didna even know we had a dungeon. When I got there, I saw an awful lot of blood, and one of his legs beside the chains his limp form was tied tah. My mother aint raised no fool though, so I didna ask any questions.

I get word that some traders are here! But that they also brought a few Gobbos with em. I dispatched the military right quicklike to take care of tha blighters an' help out the honestdwarves who's back were full o' Gobbo stabbythings... But the boys were a tad slow to the draw, an' the hilly terrain meant the marksdwarf couldna dispatch them like before. So the HammerLords and other close range Dwarfolk got their chance at bat.

They did a right good job they did. Only a few scratches at tha end of the day, and plenty o' dead Gobbos.

Turns out the stabby things in the traders were fatal though. Shame.

I'd like to mention that Envane and Zombie are ungodly beasts in combat with multiple kills under their belt and I canna imagine a foe they couldnah handle.

Time goes on...

The Gobbos don't take a hint it turns out, because I woke up one morning to find two goblin sneakybastards in some of our cage traps. They'll look mighty fine in our goblin collection an' tha children can rest safelike tonight.

Well then, after that, I don't 'ave much to say really. Summer is going to end in a few days, and everythin' here is just dandy. I canna imagine what could possibly happen to upset this loverly fortress I call home...

What's that ye say? A huge monster just awoke from it's primeval slumber in tha inky blackness?


Letter 4 - 5th of Granite, year 61

I write this, tha last of my letters with a right heavy ol; heart. I fear this 'ere may be the last o' my contact with the outside world. I'll git to explainin' why that is exactly soon enough, but fer now I 'spose I need to continue from where I dun left off.

We have a fuckin' Panda in the fuckin' basement.

By the descriptions I heard, it was a right nasty feller of a gigantic size, full of scales n' fierce as me wife on a bad day. Definitely not somethin' we wanna have to deal with methinks. The ol' fortress has been well neigh free o' death fer a good half year at this point. So why would I wanna' go and be ruining that perfectly good record by gettin' good Dwarves killed huntin' down the monster? No, live and let live says I.

There's a lake an' a wall between us an' him. So fer now we're jus' going to need to live with the fact we have a Panda in the damn basement.

Some time goes by after this point, we go a few months will nary a story to tell really. An' really though, aint no story the best kinda story sometimes? Anywho, later on them Humans go and show up, with some Greenskins right on their asses. Some o' the Gobbos get killed by our traps, The humans really do seem to lovethe rest get the taste of right nasty human steel. No injuries to anybody we care about, an' this makes me a happy Dwarf.

Now the nice thing about having gold up to our necks is tha most people love gold. A LOT. So when the humans showed up I just brought out some old solid gold vase we werenah even usin' and sold that fer a huge portion o' the Humans wares. amoung that, we got a few impressive lil' barrels o' clothing and cloth. And I do like clothing as ye well know.

The work on tha Safecave progressed a lil as we started ta do that irragatin' nonsense... And that was right n' good up until tha point some of the water cleared away an we realized it was all polluted with blood an' corpses an' such. A lil' bit of ol Sankis even somehow made it onto our walls... How anyone recognized the blood as 'is was beyond me fer sure.

It's fine if the cave went n' got stained red, right?

More Gobbo's show up every now n' then... We've gone n' captured so many of em in cages that I almos' wonder if we could make a Goblin Zoo? Nah, that's a right stupid idea.

Lots o' Migrants are showin' up now, i've lost track of em long ago. I jus' hope they manage to fit in round here and find somethin' useful tah do. Thankfull none o them are Nobles too... so I willna be sharin' me office anytime soon.

Most days, I spend me time either tellin folks what they can and canna have, makin' the safecave an' trainin in the Danger room. I've become right good with a hammer I have.

I start me trainin' in that danger room we have up on tha top floor.

Thing's are swell and life is calm fer the first time I remember since I first got here. We had only a few lil' misshaps here an' there... You know, lil things like some Dwarf gettin possessed by some manor o' demon, and then emergin' from his room weeks later crossbow in hand an shootin up everythin' in sight. Yeah, that happened... Some Dwarf has a bolt in his leg now, and there's a dog I dunna think will be movin' around much anymore.

A slow week tah be sure. (Dead dog slain by a Berserk Dwarf with a Crossbow)

Oh! We did have one event o' some importance what happened round then. Some Dwaves made it tah our fortress and gone told me somethin' pretty excitin':

I accepted o course, and Recommended that Davey go an' be sent back to tha Mountainhomes to become our Baron. You'll be missed ol friend, if ya do come back, I dunna think i'll be seein' ya seeing as i'll be stuck in tha safecave an' all. But i'm sure you'll do a fine ol' job of doing whatever the heck it is Barons do.

I did some thinkin' about that time of who I was gunna take with me to live a minimal existence in tha Safecave. Surely I couldna survive all on me own in there... So me? I searched the fort far and wide fer the 4 best Dwarves fer the job. They are, for records sake:

  • Brad the Boozemaker
  • Karen the Fungiineer (Who will be doin' all the farmin o' fungii)
  • Vinny Clothavella (I couldna start a colony within our colony an' not bring someone tah make more clothes now could I?)
  • Ryan Davdwarf (He's a pretty solid craftsman, he is)

Me an' these Bravedwarves will be livin' totally isolated from tha others if ever disaster strikes our fair colony.

Officialy, were known as tha Last Stand.

About this time I noticed Akyho runnin' down the halls. Ya don't see him too often outside o' his cockhome so I went n' took note... The Dwarf was giggling and mumblin' some dark words about some contraption he needs tah make. I always knew he was crazy.

Never did see him again.

The Safecave is nearly done, Winter is near fully over, an' the last thing to write about really was a small Gobbo ambush that hit our fort too quickly to react to... They were already gone n' past the drawbridge when we noticed em. I figured it was a good time tah see if our traps work the way they should...

They most certainly bloody do.

An so importantdwarves-what-read-my-letters, I must bid ye farewell. I've had me fill o the crowded life around tha fortress! Me, I just wanna live a simpler life with less tah worry about and now that i'm done me term as a leaderfolk, I spose I have tha chance tah do just that...

I went n' told the 4 other member o' the Last Stand that "The Panda is bloody coming!" and "Run fer the bloody safecave chaps!". They gave me some strange looks, but we got there, Karen is ready tah lock the door now an when she does I mayna see the rest o' the fort ever again. So farewell Dwarfkind! I ask only that ye dunah ever forget me or me contributions tah this place. An also long live Shimmeroiled and it's tale o' blood and gold!

#9 Edited by Akyho (1834 posts) -


(Well, today's the day.) Today's the day I leave my Lunar Kingdoms so that I might take a bit of a vacation in the world of Shimmeroiled. You see, quite some time ago, I heard of a start-up Fortress in need of some leadership. Immediately, I thought, "This is perfect for me! I hate dwarves! *maniacal laugh*" I signed up, and now, I leave my castle to tend to the Fortress. Of course, I can sense some of my subjects wondering what would become of my own Kingdom during my stay at the Fortress. Fret not, my royal subjects, for I leave my Kingdom in the hands of Taiyn Hidueria, Queen of Airal and the United Lunar Kingdoms. She is a master of diplomacy and government; I trust my Kingdom will be in good hands during my leave.

I arrive at the gates of Shimmeroiled and am immediately greeted by its previous ruler, . Appropriately enough, he looks like Erik the Swift of Lost Vikings fame, en 'e speaks loiyke this, 'e roiyght does! With open arms, he greets me and ushers me into the tavern. I am not sure it's a tavern, but he assures me that it is a tavern. And it is in this "tavern" that Shofixti informs me of the current situation. Apparently, the Fort has been having trouble with goblins, of late. How do I, in my infinite wisdom, solve it?

By permanently drawing up the drawbridge, of course!

Now, some of my predecessors object, telling me that I left some dwarfs out in the wilderness to fend for themselves. But I explain my rationale: coming from an isolated confederation of Kingdoms, I work best away from the prying eyes of man. Besides, I haven't had any serious control over an army for about forty years; what use could I have of such a thing? Anyway, with that taken care of, I survey the Fort, searching out any and a-

Oh, gee. A shiny gold lever. Whatever shall I do it with?

And so Shofixti's Safecave is discovered. Immediately, I order all dwarfs into the Safecave. Little do they know that one by one, they march to their eternal deaths. Yet what could harm them?

Except the spirits of the fallen?

Well, I want to make sure that these dwarfs will forever be safe, so...

I seal them away from the outside world.

Initially, the dwarfs are hopeful. They bide their time in the golden chamber at the front; some till the nearby fields to provide sustenance to this make-shift civilization, but for the most part, a relaxed calm pervades the atmosphere. Truly, the dwarfs view this as a joyous occasion for celebration.

They even alert me of the birth of new lives.

We must fix this.

They know their fate, and at first, their spirits remain as high as ever. But the winds of time slowly erodes those mountains of hope, leaving only a decaying valley where death and despair reign supreme. Conditions are cramped. These dwarfs have no space in which to mill about, leaving them only the option to crouch in agony and reflect on how a cruel tyrant revels in the despair that is now their life. The walls also shut out any light with which they can view the outside world; soon, the memory of a dwarven face fades entirely from their consciousness. Worse still, this oppressing darkness is the only life the children may ever know. They are like veal, primed for the slaughter.

Yet these miseries cannot compare to that which afflicts she who is trapped alone: Solon. Each night, she remembers that it was her who damned them to that pitiful existence which now comes to define them. This, Solon shall not soon forget, and yet still, the ghost of Olin stands forever at her side, haunting her. The ghost speaks not of Solon's sins. In fact, the ghost speaks not a word. What words could ever suffice? For you see, Olin is a permanent reminder that in time, Solon's former compatriots will shuffle off their mortal coils, fated to torment her and force her to relive those crimes for which she can never repent.

In short, she is in Hell.

Time passes...

The people forget us...
War is averted...

And dwarfs start dying. One by one, they drop like flies. Ironic wording, as not even maggots would call this squalor hospitable. The fetid stench of miasma chokes the air, reminding the living of what their eyes can no longer see. Most have grown accustomed to this new life. Others, however, remember better times, and are tormented by such memories.

Shofixti, driven to madness, lashes out at those around him...
...and takes Daveyo's life in the process. Stricken with grief, Shofixti soon ends his life, as well.
Autumn arrives. This is all we have.

Let us examine the two remaining citizens of the once great Shimmeroiled. First is Solon, with whom we have already become acquainted. She decides that enough is enough: escape must happen.

But a problem arises: she has not the energy to commit to this task. All the life has been sucked out of her. Frustrated and enraged, she lashes out at the environment around her, by which I mean "she goes berserk and murders every cat trapped in there with her". I watched her chase a cat, beat it half to death, walk away, and then run back at the fucker to finish the job, and Jesus fuck I wish I was kidding.

In time, though, she dies.

But what of the second citizen? This one is but a child. What can I say of this child that the game does not?


But deep within him remains a sliver of hope. Although ignorant of the world around him (there's a siege happening, but nothing results of it), he wishes for escape, singing this to himself with the intention of preserving what sanity remains. This does not last, though; eventually, he buries himself beneath the corpses he has come to know as his bed, never to emerge again.

And so Shimmeroiled ends. Or at least I think it ends, until I discover a final vestige of the fort in the form of Atis. She escaped the ironic safety Shofixti had intended for the fortress, but for some reason, she cannot bring herself to leave. She roams the halls of Shimmeroiled, wondering how it could have possibly come to this. Eventually, though, she settles into the Danger Room, having learned long ago not to trust the words designated to these locations.

Shofixti is not pleased, however. His eternal rage and Cockney accent know no bounds, for even in death, he causes more suffering and pain for the dwarfs than I could ever hope to achieve. He could leave the fort and rest in peace, but instead, he decides to beat and batter Atis, perhaps to instill in her the idea that while words are not to be trusted, they all mean "danger".

And that's how the year ends. Over a hundred dwarfs now lie dead, buried within Shimmeroiled rooms none shall ever manage to penetrate. My job is done. I have destroyed what was not a threat, for none but my own petty desires. I shall now return to Senastia, relaxed and sated, to rule over my Kingdom in a responsible manner, for a change.

#10 Posted by Ravenlight (8057 posts) -


I hope the fortress lasts this long!

#11 Edited by jesterroyal (390 posts) -


#12 Edited by jesterroyal (390 posts) -


Hopefully We have to start making these posts count for 2 years each.

#13 Posted by Shofixti (154 posts) -

Thanks folks!

#14 Posted by Daveyo520 (7390 posts) -

Coming together nicely.

#15 Posted by Video_Game_King (36566 posts) -

@Daveyo520 said:

Coming together nicely.

Except for the impeding goblin army.

#16 Posted by Daveyo520 (7390 posts) -

@Video_Game_King: Maybe not the fort but the story.

#17 Posted by coakroach (2493 posts) -
#18 Posted by Video_Game_King (36566 posts) -
#19 Posted by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

Thanks for the call out on twitter.

I'll try to make sure I at least bump this when any of the above years are edited. Just in case anybody is wanting to keep up.

#20 Posted by ZombiePie (6300 posts) -
@jesterroyal said:

@ZombiePie Thanks for the call out on twitter.

I'll try to make sure I at least bump this when any of the above years are edited. Just in case anybody is wanting to keep up.

You know what, my bad for not noticing this and the succession game earlier. Anyways good news is that Dave re-tweeted my tweet and is now aware of this and the succession game. 
#21 Posted by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

@ZombiePie said:

@jesterroyal said:

@ZombiePie Thanks for the call out on twitter.

I'll try to make sure I at least bump this when any of the above years are edited. Just in case anybody is wanting to keep up.

You know what, my bad for not noticing this and the succession game earlier. Anyways good news is that Dave re-tweeted my tweet and is now aware of this and the succession game.

No biggie! Genuinely, thanks for calling attention to this. I have no clue how moderators keep track of just about anything across a hundred boards. Its been a ton of fun to watch unfold and I'm hoping others might get a kick out of seeing how the GB community reacts when confronted with... "fun".

#22 Posted by Shofixti (154 posts) -

Heckyeah official recognition!

#23 Posted by Irvandus (3118 posts) -

This is amazing, keep it up guys!

#24 Posted by FiZi (142 posts) -

Awesome so far. Keep it up! I'm hoping to get in on the next one... If there is one :)

#25 Posted by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

If shofixti decides not to do another one I have no qualms with organizing it myself. So I'm pretty sure there will be at least one more (Becuase, I badly want to get out of the reserves and into the front lines).

#26 Posted by HotSauceMagik (277 posts) -

@jesterroyal: I'm with you man. I signed up fir the first succession game that never came to fruition. Missed the current one by a day or so. I am 100% in to do a new one when Shimmeroiled has reached FUN.

#27 Posted by Shofixti (154 posts) -

I hear you guys! I definitely doubt I'll be able to play in my own succession game at this rate... And the more I read the story here the more I overwhelmingly want to

#28 Posted by Aristides (90 posts) -

this is awesome, keep up the good work guys :) I play Dwarf Fortress too but I feel like the list of players is long enough already. It's weird but it's the kind of game that's almost more fun to read about than play...

#29 Posted by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

updated with sankis's first post.

#30 Posted by HotSauceMagik (277 posts) -

@Aristides: Its definitely just as fun to read as it is to play. I was in stitches the first time I read Boatsmurdered.

I would say lets start a new list now for when this one ends, but I don't want to take anything away from the current game.

#31 Posted by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

#32 Posted by Aristides (90 posts) -

@Aristides: Its definitely just as fun to read as it is to play. I was in stitches the first time I read Boatsmurdered.

I would say lets start a new list now for when this one ends, but I don't want to take anything away from the current game.

If another game follows this, I'm down. Just have to brush up on the newer additions to the game since I last played, like the medical system and the improved military.
#33 Posted by Irvandus (3118 posts) -

Remember, Remember

the tale of Boatmurdered.

The land where the elephants ruled

that was settled by fools.

Here was the start of sankis the mad

who created engravings that were quite rad

One day though Sankis burned

and no one there ever mourned

For when Sankis fell

so did the land of Boatmurdered.

Remember, Remember

the tale of Boatmurdered

The land where elephants ruled

that was settled by fools.

I imagine I will be writing something to honor this fortress at it's end/ when it all falls apart and everything and everyone is on fire or murdered by goblins.

#34 Posted by Video_Game_King (36566 posts) -

@ZombiePie said:

@jesterroyal said:

@ZombiePie Thanks for the call out on twitter.

I'll try to make sure I at least bump this when any of the above years are edited. Just in case anybody is wanting to keep up.

You know what, my bad for not noticing this and the succession game earlier. Anyways good news is that Dave re-tweeted my tweet and is now aware of this and the succession game.

Any word from him if he wants a spot in our succession game? Or is he too busy with...whatever his fortress is called? Or just the redesign in general?

#35 Posted by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

And thus ends the turn of Sankis. Updated the post!

#36 Posted by Shofixti (154 posts) -

@Video_Game_King said:

@ZombiePie said:

@jesterroyal said:

@ZombiePie Thanks for the call out on twitter.

I'll try to make sure I at least bump this when any of the above years are edited. Just in case anybody is wanting to keep up.

You know what, my bad for not noticing this and the succession game earlier. Anyways good news is that Dave re-tweeted my tweet and is now aware of this and the succession game.

Any word from him if he wants a spot in our succession game? Or is he too busy with...whatever his fortress is called? Or just the redesign in general?

Hes more than probbably too busy... But on our next fortress, perhaps we could petition him for a turn

#37 Posted by GS_Dan (1433 posts) -

More please :(

#38 Posted by Daveyo520 (7390 posts) -

@GS_Dan: Soon

#39 Posted by Daveyo520 (7390 posts) -

Oh look at that updates.

#40 Posted by buft (3409 posts) -

oh man, cant wait till the next update, gripping stuff here

#41 Posted by Zombie_Shakespeare (131 posts) -

In case anyone is following this thread for updates and not the other one, year 5 (my year) has been completed and has been logged in this thread now.

#42 Posted by Shofixti (154 posts) -

Updated with Envane's first update

#43 Posted by Shofixti (154 posts) -

Updated with all of Envane's updates! The Fortress is looking mighty fine

#44 Posted by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

WHOOPS. My bad y'all. I only remembered akyho claiming his own year and totally forgot about 2 people dropping out. So yeah. He no longer had his own year. Oooops. Updated now!

#45 Posted by Akyho (1834 posts) -

This mean I need to update with the next person. Oh joys responsibility.

#46 Posted by Video_Game_King (36566 posts) -
#47 Posted by jesterroyal (390 posts) -

There, updated. Finally.

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