avicenna's Soul Calibur IV (Xbox 360) review

Soul Calibur IV Review!

Alright dudes time to strap on your warriors cloak, shine that massive battle axe because you trying to make up for something and start listening to the most over dramatic narrator in a fighting game. That’s right; it’s time for Soul Calibur IV!

As you may know Soul Calibur first burst onto the scene almost 10 years ago making it’s debut (that’s French by the way) on the Dreamcast. I know what your thinking………..”Dream what?”. The Dreamcast, that pretty good system that Sega made but nobody bought, Soul Calibur originally came out for that…… and you know what? It was *#^$ing AWESOME! The first Soul Calibur really took fighting games to the next level. They had awesome characters, beautiful graphics, smooth controls and great fighting mechanics with weapons. Soul Calibur IV keeps up all those things, but with a few short comings.

So let’s get the good out of the way. By no means is this game bad. It looks great, the graphics are super smooth and detailed. The controls are super smooth even if you are not really into fighting games; you can just pick up and play. The characters have really cool designs and you will quickly have a favorite. This is also the first Soul Calibur with Star Wars characters……..Yeah I know random, but whatever. Darth Vader on the PS3 version and Yoda on the Xbox360, there is also the Apprentice from the Force Unleashed game coming out in September, he is on both versions. Now these Star Wars characters are pretty much the biggest news in this game. Darth Vader isn’t crazy strong so it keeps the fighting balance there. Yoda is a little fucking green turd that you can never grab because he is too short, but his attacks aren’t the strongest, so it’s not that bad. The Apprentice will hand you your ass though. Hands down the strongest character in the game, he will make you his bitch in no time. That motherfucker uses the force so much that you wonder how come nobody else in Star Wars thought of this first. All your other favorite characters are there as well such as Kilik, Maxi (Pad), Cervantes, and that pervert dude (Voldo). The women have had some significant changes to their design, specifically the breasts. The boobs are huge and they bounce a lot more. I know this may sound gay, but I really didn’t like it, they just ruined their designs by adding bigger boobs, but I liked looking at them.

Soul Calibur added a new feature called the Soul Gage, pretty much if you block too much you get pieces of your armor or clothing (pants) blown off of you. It’s a nice add, because all those turds that block too much can’t do that anymore. There is also a finishing move for all the characters, but it’s pretty much useless. It’s kind of hard to pull it off and there is this cinematic that goes along with it that just takes too long and you don’t care. Customization is still present and it’s awesome, you are pretty much just limited by your imagination. There are so many hats, swords, cloaks and armor to choose from that it’s almost too much. You can’t customize the Star Wars characters though. It’s a shame because I wanted Yoda to wear a Top Hat and Monocle, but I guess my dreams will have to wait one more day.

Soul Calibur has an arcade mode, and story mode, and mode. mode is pretty standard run of the mill stuff, but still fun. Story Mode makes no sense at all. The intro for every character is text, like come on. I don’t want to read, I want to be read to. The best part about the story mode is the Narrator. He says shit like, “As he climbs towards destiny, he must battle the shadows of History”…..uh wtf does that mean? Who CARES! LETS FIGHT! Tower of souls mode pretty much replaced the Quest mode in the older games. You have to fight battles after battle as you make your way up this Tower and….blah blah blah who gives a shit.

The makers of Soul Calibur totally ripped out the most fun part of the game. Quest mode would make single player interesting. They would have stuff like “the ring is poisoned beat your opponent in 10 seconds” or “Keep your foe up in the air for 20 seconds”. I even remember where you had to fight on a beam and you had to knock people off to get to the end. It was fun, different, interesting and now it’s gone. Oh well, at least there are big tits in the game now.

All in all it’s a good game, not great. If you are a Soul Calibur fan or if you play a lot of games with your friends you should pick it up. A little disappointing but still a solid game. I give Soul Calibur IV…….(drum roll) 3 out of 5 Stars
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