100+ Things You've Learned Playing Skyrim (Spoiler Free Edition!)

#201 Posted by raynate2022 (321 posts) -

207. What felt like playing for 12 minutes, was actually the last 3 hours of your life.

#202 Edited by Tennmuerti (8515 posts) -

208. The Emperor is a pretty cool guy and doesn't afraid of anything.

209. Some dragons are soulless bastards.

210. The Blade's recruitment standards have really gone downhill. As long as you are Dragonborn's buddy (even drinking buddy) it's all cool.

211. Organized crime (of both sorts) in Skyrim is in a pretty pathetic state. But you can save it!

212. A dude can accumulated quite a lot of obligations on his afterlife to various parties.

213. If you're a werewolf and you marry a werewolf. Do you always do it doggy style?

214. You can back stab and slit throats of ghosts.

215. For that matter you can decapitate ghosts.

216. People like to shout macho things at you while they are being decapitated. And even a few moments afterwards.

217. Todd Howard lies when marketing, wait I already knew that.

218. Bards guild sucks. And so they remain the worst profession in rpgs. All is well.

#203 Posted by Sweep (9752 posts) -

@QKT said:

74. sometimes you have an arrow permanently stuck in your face.

Just like in real life.

#204 Edited by BlinkyTM (1057 posts) -

219. Dragons can fly under the ground and attack you from below.

220. Real life Bards are better than most in-game bards:

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#205 Posted by MB (14421 posts) -

Edited all of the numbers, deleted some duplicates. Up to 220 now and all should be in order, keep 'em coming! Try to avoid anything remotely spoiler-ish and keep off topic chatter to a minimum so we can keep the topic as clean as possible.

#206 Posted by paskaroni (22 posts) -

I apologize if I missed someone posting this earlier...

221. If you're right-handed in real life, so is your character in Skyrim, and vice versa...

#207 Edited by Dharmasaurus (11 posts) -

222. Some of the guards sound like Schwarzenegger.

#208 Posted by Godlyawesomeguy (6420 posts) -

223. Knee armour has yet to be invented.

#209 Posted by DrMadHatten (133 posts) -

224) Most people in Skyrim concluded that you should not have come here.

#210 Posted by benspyda (2124 posts) -

225) If an enemy can't find the person who sniped their buddy, they come to the conclusion they were just hearing things.

#211 Posted by AhmadMetallic (19303 posts) -
@benspyda said:

225) If an enemy can't find the person who sniped their buddy, they come to the conclusion they were just hearing things.

#212 Posted by DoctorWelch (2817 posts) -

226. Never let a Frost Troll chase you into a town or the Guards will be pissed at you and murder you while the Troll murders everyone else.

#213 Posted by ArgonianFromSkyrim (3 posts) -

227. Most of my friends don't know what an Oblivion gate is...

#214 Posted by Rxanadu (577 posts) -

228) Don't shout at the Graybeards. They'll juggle you with their shouts until you die.

229) Two dragons fighting each other is actually a deadly debate in practice.

#215 Posted by MariachiMacabre (7097 posts) -

230) Seriously, kill the Thalmor. All of them. They only serve to insult you until you murder them.

#216 Posted by InternetCrab (1581 posts) -

231. If you shout, you blow people away.

#217 Edited by DakotaLeeJohnson (17 posts) -

232.Watch out. Sometimes if your just walking down the street and dude with a wagon of cabages walks by don"t get too close. One time a cabage got stuck on me and was floating in front of my face. I then drew my sword and it floated to the backside of my head. Finally it got off somehow, I don't remember what I did. 233.Going up to random citizens and shooting them in the head with an arrow might sound like a good idea, but it does have its consequences.

#218 Edited by MCFunkyStudent (8 posts) -

234) Don't feed the Sabre Cat, that is all

#219 Posted by Linkhyrule (14 posts) -

235) Bears and Sabre Cats work together... against you.

#220 Posted by rb_man (494 posts) -

236) Don't start a fist fight it summons Dragons

#221 Posted by DiegoBorin (7 posts) -

237) Ulfric is a stage name. Real name is Adolf.

#222 Edited by Storms (364 posts) -

238. If, in the course of 250 hours of playing, 20 of the 2,000,000 things in the game go awry, wailing and gnashing of teeth will ensue.  
239. Carrying a million gold on your person doesn't weigh you down even 1/10 of a unit. Packing away hawk feathers, that's a different story.
240. Bethesda is pretty much satan for not keeping things stable, polished, focused and unambitious. 
241. Too much magic can be dangerous. You could burn your sweetroll. 
242. Buying a gaming PC is, apparently, a reasonable solution to casually suggest for every issue one might encounter -- but buying a controller if you don't like the way the UI handles on a keyboard is just silly.

#223 Posted by DiegoBorin (7 posts) -

243) Sweetroll thievery is a big issue for guards in Skyrim.

#224 Edited by Coreymw (248 posts) -

243.8. These blue orbs in an unnamed dungeon follow you everywhere.

243.9. This is a .gif. Click it to animate. Mammoths are not to be screwed with. They killed a dragon, straight up.

#225 Posted by Blackout62 (1520 posts) -

244. No one will ever have enough gold to buy all the dragon bones and scales you're carrying.

#226 Posted by blueinferno (480 posts) -

245. When NPC's glitch out, kill them

#227 Edited by Bollard (6534 posts) -

@Vexxan said:

50. A horse will always want to fight a dragon, but a horse will never win against a dragon.

Unless it's Shadowmere.

246. I used to be an adventurer. Until I took an arrow to the knee.

#228 Edited by GaryDooton (60 posts) -

@DiegoBorin said:

243) Sweetroll thievery is a big issue for guards in Skyrim.

247.) As is " lollygaggin' " . Never lollygag.

248.) Do you not attempt to talk to a recently decapitated head at the guillotine, because, as you will be duly informed, "this person is busy".

249.) You will have a hard time explaining yourself when your wife catches you undressing a dead woman and throwing her down a hill.

#229 Posted by pweidman (2447 posts) -

Every urn, in every dungeon, in the entire skyrim universe, contains between 2 and 8 septims.

#230 Posted by ripsaw117 (211 posts) -

@Afroman269 said:

10) Fuck trolls, especially ice trolls. (not that kind of fuck)


#231 Edited by CamiKitten (11 posts) -

251) Dead dragons still tend to make flapping sounds as skeletons. 

#232 Posted by TheSouthernDandy (4012 posts) -

252) The Dragonborn can slay giants, dragons and trolls with ease but can't quite figure out how to jump while sprinting.

#233 Posted by Asmo917 (501 posts) -

100. The worst time to have enough health potions to survive an encounter with an Elder Dragon...is when you have TWO Elder Dragons circling above you.

#234 Posted by MHMason (7 posts) -

Two dragons are not better than one.

#235 Posted by Rizzest (7 posts) -

21) Some Orcs are on a reservation for Orcs...so they are Native "Skyrimians"? (Trying to spin off Native Americans.)

#236 Posted by Stepside (558 posts) -

254. At earlier levels, don't complete the quest with Barbas the dog (i.e. take him back to his cave/master) - just keep him as your companion. He's invincible and can't be killed and will prove invaluable bait to enemies who attack him while you backstab them like crazy.

#237 Edited by rockyhorrorgerri (402 posts) -

@DiegoBorin said:

243) Sweetroll thievery is a big issue for guards in Skyrim.

Ha! -thumbs up-

#Whatevernumberisbeforemine) I am over qualified to be a guard: I have taken countless arrows to not only the knee, but face, back, chest, appendages, and I am STILL adventuring.

#238 Posted by Aegon (6750 posts) -
@ripsaw117 said:

@Afroman269 said:

10) Fuck trolls, especially ice trolls. (not that kind of fuck)


Exactly what I was going to say. 
#239 Posted by SexyToad (2939 posts) -

257)Your horse still loves you if even though you punch him, bashed him, lit him on fire, froze him, slash at him, shoot an arrow at them, make them jump off of unreasonable heights, make them climb mile high mountains, etc.

#240 Posted by SarcasticIndeed (2 posts) -

257. Never piss off a horse with eyes.

258. When a companion blocks your path, shout at him.

259. Never steal anything from the Sleeping Giant Inn, or you'll have an immortal delphine chasing you for the rest of your life.

#241 Posted by Skyrimnerd (12 posts) -

21) over half of the skills can be leveled to 100 on a short time with glitches

#242 Posted by SgtCarlMc (6 posts) -

In the Mehrunes Razor Quest, when you get to Mehrunes Alter, the Daedric Lords keep respawning at least 6 times, thats 12 Daedric Hearts for Daedric Armor

#243 Posted by rockyhorrorgerri (402 posts) -


Do not EVER contract vampirism. Period.

#244 Posted by muktor (64 posts) -

you can become an archmage in one day

#245 Edited by RyanD (102 posts) -

264) it doesn't matter if you take all of a dragon's bones. The dragon will still have bones when you walk away...

#246 Posted by plantass (2 posts) -

you can kill a fuckin dragon at level 10 but you can't kill a giant till your level 30

#247 Posted by RedCricketChase (462 posts) -

@bunnymud said:

110. Your smoking habbit doubles while playing Skyrim


#248 Posted by SteveRodgers (15 posts) -

save now to save your ass later

#249 Posted by Tsoglani (595 posts) -

267). Arrow to the knee jokes got old very, very quickly.

#250 Posted by _Chad (999 posts) -

Hypothermia isn't a thing.

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