There are, at last count, somewhere in the neighborhood of a quarter million words in the English language, and that doesn't even count all the stuff currently contained within the hallowed pages of Urban Dictionary. And yet, this does not stop Japanese developers from actively going out of their way to dig into the annals of obscure language, and even recombine words in inexplicable fashion, as if words were some malleable form, just waiting to be reshaped by the right set of hands. And thus, we find ourselves with games like Tactics Ogre: Let Us Cling Together, Ar tonelico Qoga: Knell of Ar Ciel, and now, Theatrhythm: Final Fantasy.
What in the Sam Hell is a Theatrhythm: Final Fantasy, you ask? Totally reasonable question. According to the announcement of the game featured in Japan's weekly magazine Jump (thankfully translated by Andriasang), it is a "theater rhythm" game. What in the Sam Hell does that mean? I. Don't. Know.
What Andriasang was able to ascertain from the info-lite announcement story is that the game will feature battles similar to the side-view battles in older Final Fantasy games, and that multiple popular characters from the series, including Cloud and Lightning, will make appearances--albeit in a decidedly cuter, "Chibi"-inspired form. Other stories covering the announcement have made note of the gameplay resembling something like Patapon, with rhythmic tapping tying into the game's battle system.
Whatever the heck it is, we will supposedly learn more about Theatrhythm: Final Fantasy when more info pops up in next week's Famitsu. In the meantime, I'll just go back to developing my Final Fantasy-themed cooking simulator, Final Fantasy Epicuriosity: Can This Sandwich Be a Dream?