Breaking up is hard to do

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Avatar image for claude
Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -

Hello Wii, we need to talk. We've had a time.

A Wii life on Giant Bomb in pictures.

 Super Swinging was fun!
 Super Swinging was fun!

 Games as bad as my MS Paint.
 Games as bad as my MS Paint.



 Wii Defense Force, hell yeah!
 Wii Defense Force, hell yeah!

 Oh my.
 Oh my.

No Caption Provided

 I saw a Narwhal in Endless Ocean. I took this picture.
 I saw a Narwhal in Endless Ocean. I took this picture.

 Tiger Woods PGA Tour with Motion Plus, you'll shoot your eye out kid.
 Tiger Woods PGA Tour with Motion Plus, you'll shoot your eye out kid.

 My 58 in Wii Sports Resort.
 My 58 in Wii Sports Resort.

 What gamers really want.
 What gamers really want.

 Wii fan working hard.
 Wii fan working hard.


 Hardcore Wii
 Hardcore Wii

 It's a sad story.
 It's a sad story.

 Fun with the Wii.
 Fun with the Wii.

 Holding on.
 Holding on.

 EGM 2005 Revolution?
 EGM 2005 Revolution?



 You can't kill me with words.
 You can't kill me with words.
It's come to this. I'm breaking up with you Wii. Maybe it was the fact I went HD that caused our relationship to strain or maybe the lack of Mario Golf or F-Zero, two of my favorite Nintendo franchises. I'll still give you a booty call from time to time and Skyward Sword seems like a nice piece of software. If you don't mind, I'll always plug a few older games in when the need arises. You will not collect dust.

Actually, I just want to see other consoles and see you too. Is that cool? It is? Cool. See you around Wii, see you around. I heard your next generation sister is going to be hot, that's cool right? Incest is best...that's what I was thinking. Let's not get all PC.

Can we be friends?

Yes

Thanks for viewing Claude
Online
Avatar image for claude
#1 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -

Hello Wii, we need to talk. We've had a time.

A Wii life on Giant Bomb in pictures.

 Super Swinging was fun!
 Super Swinging was fun!

 Games as bad as my MS Paint.
 Games as bad as my MS Paint.



 Wii Defense Force, hell yeah!
 Wii Defense Force, hell yeah!

 Oh my.
 Oh my.

No Caption Provided

 I saw a Narwhal in Endless Ocean. I took this picture.
 I saw a Narwhal in Endless Ocean. I took this picture.

 Tiger Woods PGA Tour with Motion Plus, you'll shoot your eye out kid.
 Tiger Woods PGA Tour with Motion Plus, you'll shoot your eye out kid.

 My 58 in Wii Sports Resort.
 My 58 in Wii Sports Resort.

 What gamers really want.
 What gamers really want.

 Wii fan working hard.
 Wii fan working hard.


 Hardcore Wii
 Hardcore Wii

 It's a sad story.
 It's a sad story.

 Fun with the Wii.
 Fun with the Wii.

 Holding on.
 Holding on.

 EGM 2005 Revolution?
 EGM 2005 Revolution?



 You can't kill me with words.
 You can't kill me with words.
It's come to this. I'm breaking up with you Wii. Maybe it was the fact I went HD that caused our relationship to strain or maybe the lack of Mario Golf or F-Zero, two of my favorite Nintendo franchises. I'll still give you a booty call from time to time and Skyward Sword seems like a nice piece of software. If you don't mind, I'll always plug a few older games in when the need arises. You will not collect dust.

Actually, I just want to see other consoles and see you too. Is that cool? It is? Cool. See you around Wii, see you around. I heard your next generation sister is going to be hot, that's cool right? Incest is best...that's what I was thinking. Let's not get all PC.

Can we be friends?

Yes

Thanks for viewing Claude
Online
Avatar image for gamer_152
#2 Posted by Gamer_152 (14464 posts) -

Claude, breaking up with his Wii? This can't be! Oh well, nice pictures Claude.

Moderator
Avatar image for video_game_king
#3 Posted by Video_Game_King (36564 posts) -

But I thought you two were here to stay, motherfuckers. You even said so on video.

Avatar image for marz
#4 Posted by Marz (5939 posts) -

  This song just jumped in my head for some reason.

Avatar image for claude
#5 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -
@Gamer_152 said:
" Claude, breaking up with his Wii? This can't be! Oh well, nice pictures Claude. "
If Arnold can break up with Maria, I can leave my Wii. Hey, we're still friends and I get to keep what matters the most in this relationship.
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Avatar image for bravetoaster
#6 Posted by BraveToaster (12636 posts) -

Good thing you didn't get Wii preggers. You're far too young for offspring.

Avatar image for jjor64
#7 Posted by JJOR64 (19670 posts) -

The last fun game I played through on my Wii was Donkey Kong Country Returns.  I really would love to play a new Wii game, but there just isn't anything that interests me.

I miss my Wii as well, but my Xbox just keeps sucking me in with Street Fighter.

Avatar image for thepickle
#8 Posted by ThePickle (4319 posts) -

His name is Claude. He loves his Wii, he loves his goddamn Wii.

Avatar image for skullo
#9 Posted by Skullo (689 posts) -

OH NO!

Avatar image for claude
#10 Edited by Claude (16648 posts) -
@Video_Game_King said:

" But I thought you two were here to stay, motherfuckers. You even said so on video. "

Here to stay and loving my fucking Wii are two different things. I will still love my Wii, but in a booty call fashion. I'm here to stay on Giant Bomb as in motherfuckers.

And yes, I'm using a lot of sexual innuendo, but that's fun.
Online
Avatar image for afroman269
#11 Posted by Afroman269 (7440 posts) -

Nice collection of pictures. I kinda miss the Wii Defense Force.

Avatar image for kyreo
#12 Posted by Kyreo (4682 posts) -

I promise, Claude, that I will read this later and respond thoughtfully.  I promise.

Avatar image for daveyo520
#13 Posted by Daveyo520 (7733 posts) -

BUT YOU LOVE YOUR WII! NOOOO! How could you!? You can't do this to it! You just can't! ;_;

Avatar image for kaosangel-DELETED
#14 Posted by KaosAngel (14251 posts) -

Finally.  

If you're still gaming on a Wii, it's time you upgrade.  Pick up a nice PS3 and enjoy the fresh library of exclusives.  Nintendo made the best mistake of any company's life with the Wii.

Avatar image for jjweatherman
#15 Posted by JJWeatherman (14906 posts) -

Claude, nooooo! You're not Claude anymore without your undying Wii-love! We're gonna have to edit the GB Community song now. Do you realize that? Do you realize the implications of your actions?! This is easily the most irresponsible thing I've ever witnessed!


*mumbles*I knew it wouldn't last.

*kicks chair and storms out*

(Sorry, I'm tired. I post things like this when I'm tired.)
Avatar image for daveyo520
#16 Posted by Daveyo520 (7733 posts) -
@JJWeatherman: Are you always tired?
Avatar image for jjweatherman
#17 Posted by JJWeatherman (14906 posts) -
@Daveyo520 said:
" @JJWeatherman: Are you always tired? "
Hmmm. Yeah, that's probably accurate.
Avatar image for sparklykiss
#18 Posted by sparklykiss (2041 posts) -
But... You loved your Wii. You loved your god-
@HandsomeDevil said:
" His name is Claude. He loves his Wii, he loves his goddamn Wii. "
Dammit, beat me to it!

Now what will Claude love? This is depressing.

@JJWeatherman said:
" Claude, nooooo! You're not Claude anymore without your undying Wii-love! We're gonna have to edit the GB Community song now. Do you realize that? Do you realize the implications of your actions?! This is easily the most irresponsible thing I've ever witnessed!

*mumbles*I knew it wouldn't last.

*kicks chair and storms out*

(Sorry, I'm tired. I post things like this when I'm tired.)
"
This just means we need a new song, a better song. A song with whatever Claude's new love will be.
Avatar image for smtdante89
#19 Posted by SMTDante89 (2869 posts) -

Well, as long as you two are keeping in touch I guess it's alright.  But there's probably going to be a bit of awkwardness between you two from now on.

Avatar image for arbitrarywater
#20 Posted by ArbitraryWater (14470 posts) -

Oh great Claude. I thought you and the Wii were going to be together forever. Who gets custody of the kids?

Avatar image for conker
#21 Posted by Conker (1009 posts) -
Here you g-oh wait.... 
Here you g-oh wait.... 
Avatar image for ssj4raditz
#22 Posted by ssj4raditz (1156 posts) -

Beardless Claude looks hip!

Avatar image for claude
#23 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -
@ArbitraryWater said:
" Oh great Claude. I thought you and the Wii were going to be together forever. Who gets custody of the kids? "
I expect custody of my games to be brought to the new Nintendo console. That's all I ask. Let's have an easy transition in this relationship. I broke up with my Wii, I don't want a divorce with Nintendo.
Online
Avatar image for hitmanagent47
#24 Edited by HitmanAgent47 (8553 posts) -

With your beard, you look like 70 years old, without it you look 35. Never owned a wii though.

Just saying you look better without the beard imo.

Avatar image for privateirontfu
#25 Posted by PrivateIronTFU (3858 posts) -

I just got rid of my Wii. I realized the only two games I played for it were Super Mario Galaxy 2 and Donkey Kong Country Returns. Both of which I've beaten. And there doesn't seem to be anything on the horizon, besides Zelda, which I'll probably just get when the new Nintendo console comes out. And maybe those games will look a little prettier. 

Avatar image for claude
#26 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -
@HitmanAgent47 said:
" With your beard, you look like 70 years old, without it you look 35. Never owned a wii though. "
I'm thousands of years old.
Online
Avatar image for tuddlesworth
#27 Posted by Tuddlesworth (120 posts) -

Claude, you would paint the town jealous if you wore a top hat. 

Avatar image for cornman89
#28 Posted by Cornman89 (1600 posts) -

There's nothing worth believing in anymore.

Avatar image for claude
#29 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -
@Cornman89 said:
" There's nothing worth believing in anymore. "
With video games, there's always hope. With video games, you must have faith. It's the sole of the con that gets you.
Online
Avatar image for little_socrates
#30 Posted by Little_Socrates (5844 posts) -

Do you know how crazy it is to read your name in teal instead of red? Actually, I'm starting to wonder if it was always that way.

Avatar image for turboman
#31 Posted by turboman (9001 posts) -

There's always Wii HD, right?

Avatar image for portis
#32 Posted by Portis (1295 posts) -
@Claude said:


 What gamers really want.
 What gamers really want.

What the fuck? Creepy.

Avatar image for jjweatherman
#33 Posted by JJWeatherman (14906 posts) -
@Portis said:
" @Claude said:


 What gamers really want.
 What gamers really want.

What the fuck? Creepy.

"
I believe this was the result of a joke made on the Endless Ocean Quick Look. But yeah, it's an ominous cover for sure.
Avatar image for claude
#34 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -
@Afroman269 said:
" Nice collection of pictures. I kinda miss the Wii Defense Force. "
I still talk to oldschool. It's on facebook. I could still kick his ass for being banned. But I love him.
Online
Avatar image for afroman269
#35 Posted by Afroman269 (7440 posts) -
@Claude: He was banned? I thought it was just linkyshinks and then the other guys left.
Avatar image for claude
#36 Edited by Claude (16648 posts) -
@Afroman269 said:

" @Claude: He was banned? I thought it was just linkyshinks and then the other guys left. "

Far as know. I saw all the PMs and shit. I big misunderstanding and all parties were pissed. oldschool was dismissed. Along with Al3xnd3r.

EDIT

I should say, they asked for it.
Online
Avatar image for liquidprince
#37 Posted by LiquidPrince (16829 posts) -

Microwaved Wii scares me.

Avatar image for thehexeditor
#38 Posted by thehexeditor (1436 posts) -

Claude, you're amazing. Truly a one of a kind renaissance man.

Avatar image for kyreo
#39 Posted by Kyreo (4682 posts) -

Just as long as you still love your Goddamn Wii, I approve of this choice and you have my blessings.

Avatar image for gerhabio
#40 Posted by Gerhabio (1996 posts) -

That's you, Claude? You sound really young in the community song.

Avatar image for brendan
#41 Posted by Brendan (8953 posts) -

I don't even know you personally, but this is huge.  Where the fuck is our so-called real reporter if he isn't on this goddamn story!  Paaatriiiiiiick!!!

Avatar image for yoshimitz707
#42 Posted by yoshimitz707 (2539 posts) -

Yeah, Claude sounds like he's 15 in the community song. Freaks me out.

Avatar image for funexplosions
#43 Edited by FunExplosions (5534 posts) -

Badass beard, badass shave, badass Wii pics, badass picture-story, badass everything.

Avatar image for toowalrus
#44 Posted by TooWalrus (13389 posts) -

It does seem mind blowing that a console focused mainly on the imitation of sports movements and plastic racing wheels never got a new Mario Golf or F-Zero- Mario Golf Advance Tour and that GBA F-Zero both came out while I was traveling around the planet with my somewhat shattered family, I played the hell out of them. 

Avatar image for enigma777
#45 Posted by Enigma777 (6283 posts) -

You should have just texted it. 

Avatar image for claude
#46 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -
@TooWalrus said:
" It does seem mind blowing that a console focused mainly on the imitation of sports movements and plastic racing wheels never got a new Mario Golf or F-Zero- Mario Golf Advance Tour and that GBA F-Zero both came out while I was traveling around the planet with my somewhat shattered family, I played the hell out of them.  "
Strange indeed. I've been playing F-Zero GX on my Wii and Mario Golf: Toadstool Tour. Why is that? Why did I have to buy these games again? Only Nintendo knows. They look great in 480p though. Just saying.
Online
Avatar image for s7evn
#47 Posted by s7evn (1067 posts) -

You'll be back next year when the next Nintendo console is out :)

Avatar image for claude
#48 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -
@Enigma777 said:
" You should have just sexted it.  "
Online
Avatar image for sparky_buzzsaw
#49 Posted by sparky_buzzsaw (7819 posts) -

So long as you keep in touch with it, I'm not releasing the hounds.  Maybe.  OK, goddamn it, I really want to release the hounds.  Don't make me.

Do they still make Choose Your Own Adventure books?  Man, I dug the shit out of those as a wee one.  Gooooood times.

Avatar image for toowalrus
#50 Posted by TooWalrus (13389 posts) -
@Claude said:
" @TooWalrus said:
" It does seem mind blowing that a console focused mainly on the imitation of sports movements and plastic racing wheels never got a new Mario Golf or F-Zero- Mario Golf Advance Tour and that GBA F-Zero both came out while I was traveling around the planet with my somewhat shattered family, I played the hell out of them.  "
Strange indeed. I've been playing F-Zero GX on my Wii and Mario Golf: Toadstool Tour. Why is that? Why did I have to buy these games again? Only Nintendo knows. They look great in 480p though. Just saying. "
Oh I know, I recently played through Luigi's Mansion (again) using the Wii, looked better than ever- those component cables are great. 

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