Warning: This post is going to mostly be me venting but if anyone has any actual suggestions on what to do here, that would be awesome.  
 
A while back (it feels like forever at this point), my Xbox 360 disc tray died. The error was that the tray would no longer read discs and would just read "Open Tray." This may have been my fault because before this happened, I had moved my Xbox and accidentally left it on an uneven surface while the disc was spinning. However, that's neither here nor there. The fact was it was broken, I had to pay 100 bucks and send it in for repair. An annoyance but I can deal with it, whatever. A few weeks later, the 360 comes back from repair. I put in a disc and lo and fucking behold, it's the same "Open Tray" bullshit. I could even tell that the disc tray was extra slow opening and closing. Maybe out of pure disbelief, I continued to open and close the tray for about 10 minutes. When, suddenly, it started working! The next day, I quickly realized that this was what was going to happen every time I turn on my console. I would have to open and close the disc tray for 10 minutes (sometimes more, sometimes less) in order to get a disc to play. And I actually did this for about a week until I realized that it just wasn't worth it. I called up Xbox Support and after some particularly useless suggestions, the idiot on the other end told me there was no way to fix it and I would need to send it in for repair...again. So, I send it again, definitely more annoyed than last time. That brings me to today... 
 
After another couple weeks of waiting, my Xbox is back. I hook it back up and start going through the initial start up process (pick your country, resolution, that shit) when I get to the part where I need to connect to Xbox Live. Well, I try to connect to Xbox Live the same way I have for years, with my wireless connection. And this is the message I get: 
 
"To use a wireless Internet connection, connect an Xbox 360 Wireless Networking Adapter to your console." 
 
A fine suggestion. Other than the fact that I have a 360 Slim with has a built-in wireless connection and I have NEVER fucking used a Networking Adapter. I go online to investigate and the only temporary solution I can find is "turn off everything and unplug everything for 10 minutes and then turn it on again." I do that and big fucking shocker, that shit doesn't work. Thanks Internet. The only other information I can find  is that this is a hardware problem and (you fucking guessed it) it requirements a goddamn repair. At this point, I'm in utter fucking disbelief. How can they fuck this shit up TWICE? Isn't it the repair centers job to fix the problem? HOW DO YOU COMPLETELY FAIL AT YOUR JOB NOT ONCE BUT TWICE? The real kicker here is that the guy I talked to on support the second time told me that my console was going to through a second testing process to ensure that there would be no problems again. Yeah, I guess that was some bullshit. I don't know what to do at this point. I made a post on the Xbox Support forums. The best solution I got there is "derp I don't know. Send it in?" How can I send it away for another 3 weeks when they have already proved twice that they are incapable of fixing anything? So, I can get it back and find another problem with it? I would call up Support again but I'm so frustrated that I'm scared I'll end up threatening to murder the guy over the phone. 
 
I just want to play some fucking video games. Is that so much to ask? The good news is that the disc tray does indeed work now besides the fact that it sounds like a fucking jet engine taking off. So, technically, I could play some games but I just not be able to use this service that I fucking pay for because Microsoft can't fix their own shit. Have any of you ever experienced anything like this? Am I the unluckiest person in the world? Shouldn't Microsoft just send me a whole new console at this point? I JUST WANT TO PLAY DISHONORED WHY WON'T YOU LET ME PLAY GAMES XBOX? FUCKING WHY?

Have you tried an Ethernet connection?

Man, that's pretty rough.

Not to sound like a jackass, but when my original 360 red-ringed I got the shipping box two days after calling and had the thing back within the week. Basically, your experience was much worse than most, I think, and Microsoft is usually better than that.

I feel for you. This kind of thing sucks. I've had to dismantle my home theater system twice now because the receiver stopped working properly. It's bad enough you have to be without it for a while, but having to extricate it from its wires and cables just adds insult to injury.

I'd call it in now rather than wait, just to get it on record even if you don't end up sending it in right away.

Have you tried an Ethernet connection?

Microsoft is terrible with this type of shit, it's a big reason why I got rid of my 360. I wish I could give you some helpful tips but I just gave up and my scenerio was not nearly as bad as yours.

In case anyone's wondering (you're probably not), I called up Xbox Support today and they told me that I had to send the console in for yet another repair. The best advice I got over the phone was "wow...that sucks..." and some guy asking "so uh...you like Grand Theft Auto, man?" as I tried to fight back my seething rage. 

Similar thing happened to me re the disc tray, had to keep ejecting for it to read, didn't even try microsoft, took it to a repair guy who looked at it and said it was a motherboard problem and I'd be better off buying a new one, which I did. Probably not what you wanted to hear, but it was most definitely problem solved.

Damn, that's some bad luck. I've only had to send my console in twice due to two isolated incidents (one of them being the 'Open Tray' problem). I never had to pay anything and both times I had my console returned within 4 days of me sending it out. They also gave me a 1-Month Subscription card both times.

@Milkman Dunno if you have twitter but the @XboxSupport twitter is pretty great they are pretty quick to respond and its an easier way to contact support rather than calling them and having to deal with the outsourced call center with some Indian dude who can barely speak proper English. Obviously no guarantees here in any fashion but that is usually my first route I take when I have issues.