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Albummer!'s Things of the Year!

Perhaps our heavy metal friends didn't understand the point of the exercise? Who cares, we love them! Here are a few of Albummer!'s favorite things.

Hello beautiful babies,

We're Albummer!, the first show on Giant Bomb to scientifically prove sincerity is the ultimate cringe, and selling ringtones is the only true art. Since everyone at this wonderful and foolishly supportive website is starting their Game of the Year conversations, we thought it might be kind of cool to give you our individual Game of the Year answers in the art form made most popular by The Heavens Gate cult, a blog post.

Jordan Olds

No Caption Provided

My game of the year was The New Therapist I Started Seeing. This one has a much better open-world map and also she isn't constantly threatening to steal my dog that she wrote an emotional support letter for.

Emily Panic

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My game of the year is Marriage. The levels vary in difficulty and every boss is a different manifestation of our intergenerational and childhood traumas, except for one level which was strangely Bowser? And I was like "why is bowser in this game?????" 7/10 stars.

Katie Rose Leon

No Caption Provided

It didn’t come out this year but I banked like 40 hours on Banner of the Maid, the only game brave enough to ask “what if the French Revolution was fought not by pale and sickly Parisian men but big titty anime wives instead?"

Drew Kaufman

No Caption Provided

My game of the year was When I Knocked Over My Batman Forever Burger King Mug and I Instinctively Kicked it to Stop the Glass from Shattering, Bruising My Foot, and Spraying Iced Coffee All Over My Apartment. Supposedly this next DLC will add a hard mode where I have the option of also burning my small cat with hot sleepy-time tea.

Jeremy Hammond

No Caption Provided

My game of the year was, as it has been every year since 2015, Cities: Skylines. It’s the only game where you are God, and God likes trains. 10/10 perfect game no notes. Toot toot.

Lucie Steiner

No Caption Provided

My favorite game of the year was a tie between a Riding-A-Horse-In-Real-Life Simulator and Struggling Desperately to Give My Husband an Orgasm.

32 Comments

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domineeto

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Great list of things, we love things don't we folks?

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Surly_Skeleton

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Lucie, your knack for off-kilter thought makes each observation pure hilarious joy. There is good in the world. Thank you.

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Googly

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The ringtone for Toxic by Britney Spears is the true thing of the year.

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permanentsigh

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LIST GOOD

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dprotp

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thanks everyone my game of the year is emily's and lucie's macho man randy savage impressions

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Doszero

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Yes Drew but did the mug break? It's OK, I'm not afraid of spoilers.

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thepullquotes

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KRL is on the money about banner of the maid!

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ALLTheDinos

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Can’t believe you didn’t start off by asking Lucie how she thinks this list got made smdh

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ketchupman36

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But does Jeremy play with mods? That's the real thing we need to know

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thewoj

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@googly said:

The ringtone for Toxic by Britney Spears is the true thing of the year.

Truly the 2021 Winner for Best Emily's First Ringtone.

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Ranaul42

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I’m confused. I thought Katie Rose Leon was gone forever. I watched a super long tik tok about it and everything.

Though she is right the French Revolution benefits from anime girls.

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kinto

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@ranaul42: List could have been done for a while now. So, who knows?

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Zeuzerian

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No surprises here, solid list

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threeOCT

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So nice of Katie to give her pick before dying. Real legend shit.

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chamurai

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Love it, great list.

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TehBuLL

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Kump is 4000 lbs of non-sense.

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MilkABadChoice

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I unlocked the achievement of "Instinctively kick falling glass into hand" once. No-one saw it though and thus, no one believes me.

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mynameisfatmike

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This list is chef's kiss, so glad to have Albummer back after the break

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csl316

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Katie's alive? Well, at least she apparently used her final hours wisely.

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somedrumbum

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Perfection

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Asadasa5

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@permanentsigh: Thank you for this, king. This one wasn’t showing up for me in the list of articles on the front page initially.

List good!!!!!!! (A full 8 for KRL)

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TheSouthernDandy

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I love these goofballs

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airbagged

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Fuck LOL

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Afro_Stevens

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Outstanding

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MrFrank88

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Edited By MrFrank88

Albummer is the Albummer of the Year

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diet_hellboy

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@kinto said:

@ranaul42: List could have been done for a while now. So, who knows?

we wrote this two months ago and that picture they chose for me is old enough to bully my son.

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dreadpan

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Solid list. Will have to check some of these out.

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Manburger

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Edited By Manburger

This cracked me up, contender for Lists of the Year!

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jeremyhammond

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@ketchupman36: i have made assets for the steam workshop of course i play with mods

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ketchupman36

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chunkmassuhflex

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I wonder how much Jordan got paid to list the New Therapist as his G(T)OTY. They didn't even upgrade the graphics, they just added more dialogue options.

And Emily? The way described marriage read more like a 3/10... don't know how she could get to a 7. Follow the Money.

Katie Rose Leon did nothing wrong.

Drew's been in Big Mug's pocket since the beginning. Remember when he was just editing, but then had to start joining the show? Also, Goku was never pregnant. That was just an image off the internet, he doesn't even know Goku like that.

Of course Jeremy likes that game. He's ALWAYS talking about it on the show. No surprise there.

And the Old Steinbag herself... I bet she doesn't even know how this list got made. For shame.

I thought Albummer! was above being corporate shills. PFFT

Of course, this is a joke.

I love all y'all motherfuckers and Albummer! has been an absolute treasure.