Well, a whole lot has changed around here since my last blog post. I’ve fallen very far behind on the soft monthly cadence for posts I set for myself because in the past few months, my attention has been pulled in other directions. Those include more music, books, and a frankly alarming number of video games. Believe me, I’ve written plenty of first paragraphs about whatever title I was playing at that time, but my motivation was usually squeezed out like sponge water. While schedule slips are nothing new to me, I ought to fight through the writer’s block and put something out there. Now is the destined moment.
As of the day of this writing, I’ve crossed 50 games beaten on my running list. That’s embarrassing on its face, especially since in my 2020 wrapup, I said I would never reach that milestone again. The fact that I did so in half the time says… something, I’m sure, but I don’t feel like I’ve wasted as much time as I probably have.
I’m also reaching another milestone: 50 blog posts on this account. My very first was in 2017, about earning the platinum trophy in Sleeping Dogs. I’m certainly not as prolific a poster as some other users I could name, but I think it’s worth celebrating the milestone anyway. This will be my 49th post, so based on the title, I’m sure you can do some complex math and predict what will come next.
Here are the first six months of my 2022 in video games.
1. Strikey Sisters – January 2
You know when you’re recovering from the holiday season, and you want something light to distract yourself? Strikey Sisters was that game for me. I first heard of it from a My Life in Gaming video about a whole pile of retro and retro-inspired Switch games. Oh, side note – I suggested that the Me Life in Gaming boys collaborate with Giant Bomb in the site survey, so I’m at least partly responsible for that happening! Anyway.
Strikey Sisters is a brick breaker with dashes of action elements that make it quite addicting. You move your little witch girl as the paddle, and you have to time swipes at the ball to give it some real potency. There are also enemies roaming around, which drop power-ups that can change the flow temporarily. There are even boss fights, which I have to imagine is not a common feature in brick breakers. The last boss caused me a whole lot of pain, and the dialogue sequences were certainly skipped through, but there’s a lot of charm here in a very cheap package. Great pixel art and arcade challenge make this one a winner if you find it on the eshop.
2. LEGO Batman 2: DC Super Heroes – January 3
If I had to nail down my own Guilty Treasure, it would almost certainly be the Traveler’s Tales LEGO games. For my particular generation, you would be hard-pressed to find more iconic shared memories around gaming. While those titles were always popular, they would never come up in any best-of lists or anything like that. In my personal history, I fell off around the second Indiana Jones. That is, until last December. LEGO Batman 2 was a Game with Gold, so I tried it out for old time’s sake. That almost immediately segued into scooping up nearly every LEGO game during the next sale and convincing several of my friends to do the same. Now I’m sitting on all these bricks, and I don’t know what to do with them.
LEGO Batman 2 itself is a weird transition between the classic structure I loved so much and what the games eventually evolved into. Chiefly, it features an open-world LEGO Gotham City for the first time, but it feels quite lifeless. The pace of each story level is great, with enjoyable puzzles in Gotham’s most important locales, but the open world doesn’t retain any of that. Naturally, you’ll just fly everywhere with Superman (blasting the John Williams theme as you do, of course) to each of the hundreds of gold bricks scattered around. This is also the first time they violated the sacred law: LEGOs Shalt Not Talk. The writing is fine for what it is, but my heart will always belong to the nonverbal comedy of the originals. As it turns out, the LEGO Boomer archetype is pretty common, which makes me feel like I’m not alone. So yeah, an average one of those, but I still got 100% because… well I just can’t not.
3. The Pedestrian – January 7
A nifty puzzle game that juxtaposes simple line art with nice 3D environments. The rules are well-taught, and nothing overstays its welcome. It's easy to imagine a ton of hair-pulling puzzles with these mechanics, but it hits a nice balance of challenge. The only time I had to give up and cheat was the very last puzzle, which itself was cool enough that I didn’t mind. And it gives you all the achievements just for playing through! Wow!
4. Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order – January 8
I’ve already put a whole post’s worth of words towards Fallen Order. Suffice it to say that Jedi: Survivor is one of the titles I’m most anticipating. This game has some rough edges, to be sure, but the opportunity to fix them all in the sequel is very exciting. As I said in the full review, good Star Wars content can have a spillover effect and pull you back into that galaxy. I really connected with Cal, Cere, and Merrin. It’s the quintessential 4/5 game that, if they focus on the right things, could easily become a 5/5 next time.
5. Mega Man 7 – January 8
I have a lot of down time at my job, so I figured I might as well put it to use with some portable gaming. The Mega Man Legacy Collection 2 is living on my Switch, and the first one I cleared from it is number 7. The first thing I think about when I remember Mega Man 7 is getting all the extra items hidden in each stage. It adds replay value, and they’re all straightforward to find, but I’ve never needed all that extra stuff to look out for in my Mega Man. I prefer him to rely on nothing but his wits and the boss weapons. But honestly, it doesn’t matter that much.
The second thing I think about is the last fight being a pain in the ass for no good reason. For the life of me, I don’t understand how to consistently dodge its attacks, and it has like 150% too much health. The third thing is that after you finally take down the boss, this is where Mega Man is fully prepared to blast Wily’s skull open once and for all. Collecting upgrades, the dissonant tone… Mega Man X elements bled back into the classic series, and I don’t know how I feel about it. I really like how this collection handles save states, though. You get one at every checkpoint, which hits a great balance between encouraging skill and not forcing you to replay parts over and over. It’s true that not relying on save scumming forms a stronger connection with a game, but I have plenty more to say on that subject later. For now, let’s talk about a game where save scumming is part of the design!
6. Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun – January 19
6a. …Aiko’s Choice – May 10
Desperados III by Mimimi Productions was one of my surprise favorites the year it came out. I was excited to check out its predecessor, and it’s the exact same thing. Taking the same concept from samurai to cowboys… I think we’ve got a Magnificent Seven situation here! While I prefer the setting and characters in Desperados III, Shadow Tactics is tremendous in its own right. With a team of up to five characters, you infiltrate enemy strongholds and take them out piece by piece. This gameplay loop is what makes the process so fun to me. Each of your characters has a handful of abilities that serve different purposes in manipulating guards. The game lays out the rules very logically, so you always feel equipped to handle whatever challenge the level design presents. Overcoming a seemingly impossible obstacle comes from finding the one weak brick you can exploit and turn into your enemies' annihilation. It's always a satisfying process no matter how many quick loads it takes. Missions also vary your team makeup, forcing you to come up with new strategies.
Getting through a mission the first time is tough enough, but once you do, the game reveals a bunch of additional challenges that are even harder. I love this choice because it lets the first playthrough be free of stress to play a certain way. Shadow Tactics seems niche at first glance, but anyone with the right mindset should be able to get tons of enjoyment out of it. The only points I deduct are for a few things that were done slightly better in Desperados III. I later purchased the standalone expansion, Aiko’s Choice, which takes place before a pivotal moment in the story. I was expecting a little more, I guess – it’s just three additional levels with some interstitial sections between them. I’m glad that the studio is continuing with this style, but I would have liked for some more new ground to be covered. Recently the whole shebang was on sale for a crazy discount, so if that ever happens again, I will personally message you angrily until you buy it.
7. Injustice: Gods Among Us – January 23
I’m a Marvel person, okay? The DC universe has never felt cohesive to me, probably because it’s stitched together with various characters the publisher bought up along the way. So when you turn that world on its head, it’s not that interesting to me. Inevitably, these cracked mirror universes involve superheroes punching each other, and here Superman has gone bad. It’s an idea we saw several times before Injustice and even more times after it. The Superman I identify with simply wouldn’t be evil. Not even the writer for the acclaimed Injustice comic series believes in the premise. The idea that Superman has to kill people to be interesting is fallacious.
Anyway, I played through the Injustice story mode because the game was free on PSN some time ago. The dated-looking character models are one thing, but the fighting is still strong. NetherRealm knows what they’re doing. Obviously, it doesn’t feel as good as Mortal Kombat 11, but it’s still fun for an afternoon of comic violence. Faced with subsequent fighters, though, I don’t think it’s worth seeking out for the story alone. The cutscene compilation videos do well for a reason.
8. LEGO The Lord of the Rings – January 26
Warner Bros. strike number two: I don’t like Lord of the Rings. I tried reading it in high school and I absolutely couldn’t stand it. I haven’t seen more than five minutes of any of the movies, all of which over my brother’s shoulder. I watched him play Shadow of Mordor, which was fun in a trashy sort of way, but far from faithful to Tolkien. The question, though – is my love for LEGO games stronger than my dislike for Lord of the Rings? The answer, it turns out, is yes.
LEGO Lord of the Rings is somewhat notorious for being delisted from digital storefronts. It is, however, backwards compatible with an Xbox 360 disc. Because the LEGO sickness ran truly deep at this point, I ordered a copy before it got more expensive. And… I got 100% again. Coming out the same year as LEGO Batman 2, the open world is a little better in this one. It’s an abridged version of Middle-Earth with plenty of crap to find, but it can also be totally ignored by following the dotted line along the Fellowship’s journey. It was the mechanics in this one that I found weak. You have dozens of random items to find and craft, which doesn’t integrate with the formula very well. Equipping these is a waste of time and finding them just feels like extra busywork. The voice audio comes directly from the movies, which gives less creative license for jokes. But in a franchise that is much too long for me, seeing the story so truncated worked surprisingly well. Unfortunately, this is by far the glitchiest of anything I’ve played this year. Bosses freezing up, characters flinging into outer space, and a flashing colors issue that could seriously harm photosensitive people is just the more egregious among them.
9. Death’s Door – January 28
When Death’s Door came out last year, I thought it looked really neat, but I had a feeling that it would come to Game Pass eventually. Waiting wins again! It’s got responsive controls, pretty graphics, and solid challenge. Obviously, it's very Zelda-inspired, with more of a twitch action bent. It's a fun world to explore. A map would have been appreciated, though, to stop me from getting turned around. You can sniff everywhere to improve your stats, or you can just grind against the more difficult fights. I never felt like victory was out of reach, which is critical to keeping me engaged against a formidable foe. So, yeah, highly recommend this one. I was hoping to like Tunic just as much, but I’m beginning to suspect that I just don’t like games with a lot of mysteries. Only put like 2 hours into that.
10. Gorogoa – January 29
Gorogoa has you solve puzzles by moving panels on a 2x2 grid. Its big hook is delving through the vignettes' layers for new discoveries. That's helped by the appealing art and sound. It’s very short, but there are moments of friction. You're left entirely to your own devices, so if you're not clear on what to do the game won't spell it out (apart from highlighting areas of interaction). However, that just makes overcoming those puzzles all the more satisfying. The story was a miss with me - not looking to feel anything while I'm doing puzzles - but it’s worth a play.
11. DOOM – February 4
Tim Rogers’s review of DOOM memorably labels Rogers as a DOOM Poser. After plowing through the modern PC release on the easiest difficulty and with mouselook enabled, all I have to say is… damn, it feels good to be a poser. Bumping the difficulty all the way down has become increasingly appealing to me in genres I consider outside of my main wheelhouse. In DOOM’s case, especially due to the image of Doomguy as an unstoppable demon-killing machine, it just feels right. It feels right to never switch from the beautiful shotgun and melt demons into pools of flesh with a single click. It feels right to whip the view around with unintended speed. It’s almost more DOOM than DOOM! I don’t even know what that means! When you aren’t doing that fun stuff, you’re running around mazes like a rat searching for keycards. That part isn’t my favorite.
12. Old School Musical – February 8
This is a rhythm game where the gimmick is pastiches of retro games. It’s fun to spot the references, but there’s just something about the whole package that feels off. For one thing, the soundtrack doesn’t really match with the games parodied on screen, which isn’t bad in itself. I had an issue where the button inputs were slightly desynced from the music, though. If I focused on the timing, I was fine, but that meant I wasn’t listening to the tracks at all. I also kind of hated the story, which was usually light and attempted comedy, but occasionally became dark and meanspirited. It overstayed its welcome by a large margin. When I beat story mode, I unlocked another set of songs set during my least favorite part. Yeah… no thanks.
13. NiGHTS… Into Dreams…. HD….. – February 13
Here we go, everyone, the first ever 3D Sonic game (by technicality)! Yuji Naka’s reputation is pretty much shot at this point, but I have to admit there’s something about NiGHTS that still interests me. It’s not the gameplay, which is pretty inscrutable most of the time. There are certain games that are designed for chasing high scores but forget to make playing them fun. Check and double-check. Still, I find the dream world visually appealing. NiGHTS is a neat-looking character. The (very light) story is fun. So what if I have no idea how I’m doing any of the things I’m doing? Obviously, that means I got poor ranks my first run through the levels – poor enough that the last one wasn’t unlocked. I had a better handle on things when I went back to improve my scores. However, the last level is identical for both the boy’s and girl’s side of the story, so I definitely only did the one side. I enjoyed NiGHTS and I can’t wait to never play it again.
14. SEGA AGES Space Harrier – February 14
The SEGA train keeps on rolling along with the Switch version of an arcade classic. I appreciate M2’s SEGA AGES releases on Switch. They add a bunch of extras to tweak, and it’s clear that the developers have a lot of reverence for these titles. I love Space Harrier as a minigame in the Yakuza series, but I hadn’t buckled down and made it all the way through. I had some extra assistance from the rerelease’s checkpoints, but that doesn’t change the fact that Space Harrier is just an enjoyable pick up and play experience no matter how it’s presented. And that music… classic!
15. Sonic 3D Blast: Director’s Cut – February 15
When you think of the mainline Sonic games, 3D Blast doesn’t come up very often. Still, I decided to be charitable to it before playing Sonic Adventure. You know... it's Sonic 3D Blast. It's not going to change your life. This "director's cut" is really cool, though. The control has been improved, which alleviates a lot of the frustration with the level design. But if you really hate the idea of exploring and grabbing birds, it's still not going to be for you. I appreciate the password feature and level select, which ratchets down the pressure by a lot. But for the life of me, I couldn't find the last two emeralds needed to get the true ending. Music remains the highlight of the whole experience, but of course that wasn't changed. I wish more developers would go back and revisit their old releases like this. This particular developer went on to make those LEGO games but wasn't a great boss and crunched his employees. Dang it.
16. The Great Ace Attorney Adventures – February 21
When I played the original Phoenix Wright trilogy, I put a year’s break between each entry to avoid getting burnt out. It had only been a few months since then, so would I get tired of the newly translated historical spin-off? Absolutely not. Exploring a new time period is exciting, and the game always keeps one foot in what I love about the series. Unlike earlier Ace Attorneys, these trials usually have juries. They won't impact your deductions often, doing so with brief segments where you must convince them to lean in your favor. This is a nice twist, but the best part is how no one vetted these jurors for impartiality. That means more voices added to the trials that alter the way proceedings unfold. The big addition to the investigation stage comes from Herlock Sholmes. Sholmes is hilarious as a slightly mad take on the great detective who always deduces incorrectly. Fixing his mistakes is dead simple, but it's gussied up with so much theatre that it's always a pleasure. A lot of times when I play these, Phoenix will say that he knows the answer, prompting me, who does not. But in some of the cases here, I figured it out before Ryunosuke. That was a great feeling and a mark of success for any mystery story. Plus, like the rest of the franchise, the soundtrack is full of instant classics.
17. Peggle NiGHTS… Into Pegs – February 21
If you played Peggle, you probably enjoyed Peggle. This is just more Peggle. It’s fun. I’m not gonna hurt myself trying to describe Peggle when I’ve got so many other games to cover.
18. Injustice 2 – February 23
I'm really only here for the story mode - I suck at fighting games and I don't like grinding for gear, either. From that perspective, this is an improvement over the first Injustice. The fidelity is obviously much nicer, and the game is very pretty during fights. Character designs are hit and miss. Some, like Scarecrow, work, but I don't know what's going on with Joker or Superman. The movesets do well at capturing the essence of each hero or villain. For anyone really into DC, this will be extra fun. But I gotta say, the evil Superman shtick was even worse this time around. Everyone is so angry, ready to beat each other to death for the flimsiest of reasons. Comics can be dark, but Superman is supposed to be the light that inspires everyone else. Obviously, this Superman is as dark as it gets. He doesn't have a character arc, which is the most disappointing thing. Would his defeat, imprisonment, and reunion with Supergirl cause him to do any reflection? Nope, he's 100% tyrannical from start to end.
19. Ultimate NES Remix – February 25
Around this time, my friend was selling his modded 3DS system. I had just recently been thinking about 3DS homebrew, so it was perfect timing. I went through a lot of frustration, technically unsavvy as I am, getting everything working. Then, there was the familiar moment of having everything to choose from but no strong desire for any of it. I finally landed on Ultimate NES Remix, a mishmash of the two NES Remixes released on the Wii U. I only played the first one when it came out, which picked from mostly crap games for its challenges. Clu Clu Land, Ice Climber, and Pinball did not make the cut for the “ultimate” version, tragically. Even with titles I really enjoy, like Kirby’s Adventure and Punch-Out, I didn’t feel the same novelty I did back in the day. Doesn’t help that I can play the full games on any device I want now. It feels like watching movie clips online, but sometimes the clip is mirrored because it’s a Remix.
20. Mario Kart 7 – February 26
Mario Kart 7: the one before Mario Kart 8. I did buy a cart of this one because I like Mario Kart. Tragically, as so often happens in this industry, the sequel overwrites the previous one. 7 is great, but I’ve spent so much time with the perfect racing feel of 8 that coming back feels unimpressive. There’s no Waluigi, even though they have his track. I don’t even like Waluigi, but that feels personal, right? What did Waluigi do? Something perverted, no doubt. The tracks in 7 are good on balance, but the best ones are either already remade in 8 or will be DLC soon. But you can’t be a bee in Mario Kart 8! Only stupid Waluigi.
21. Pokémon Legends: Arceus – March 1
“What could possibly get me to care about Pokémon again?”
I asked that question last year and landed on several answers: Either a remake of Diamond and Pearl, a new Pokémon Snap, or any kind of game that made me feel like Pokémon actually existed as natural creatures. They quickly called my bluff by releasing all of these. While I ignored Snap and left Shining Pearl is in its case unopened for now, I did play through Legends. Pokémon fans (whose standards are inscrutable to me) largely seem to celebrate it. It pushes some much-needed advancements onto the series, but there is still a ways to go.
Let’s start with the graphics and performance. Arceus looks like a Wii game. Scratch that, I’ve played Pokémon games on the Wii that look better. The comical pop-in makes the Switch look like an even worse performer than its reputation suggests. Despite that, the strength of Pokémon designs is enough to somewhat sell the illusion of a living world. It helps that the majority of monsters come from the time I was most invested in Pokémon. It’s charming to encounter them in their natural environment up close. I haven’t done so in such an open game before. The weakest parts of Arceus are the ones that stick closely to the series formula. I haven’t felt engaged by Pokémon battles for a long time, and the battles here are turned to 11. I know fans that have a disturbing depth of knowledge about Pokémon mechanics; meanwhile, I can only remember about half the type matchups. Every time I threw out my Pokémon, either it would die in one turn or my opponent would. It was like a samurai duel where the fastest creature would mercilessly cut down their enemy. Even as my leveling fell behind, I was able to eke out victories. It was fun being challenged like that, but I got the sense that the system wasn’t working as designed. I don’t know how you could possibly untangle Pokémon battles and reinvent them, but I’m ready for a bigger change. And the story… well, I couldn’t tell you about the story because I was actively looking away from the screen and button mashing while it happened. While the Pokémon in Arceus are more real, the human element becomes more and more artificial with each iteration. Arceus didn’t fully reignite my love for Pokémon, but it did convince me that there’s still a spark that can cause the franchise to evolve.
22. LEGO Batman 3: Beyond Gotham – March 8
This iteration of the LEGO formula is a big improvement over the previous Batman game. I know I said I’m not a fan of the wider DC universe, but LEGO is the great equalizer where anyone can fit in. This goes for a kitchen sink approach where your party can pretty much do anything at any time. As a result, the puzzles feel a little less deliberate than before. Still, more characters get a chance to shine as you control both the Justice League and the Legion of Doom. The well of cameo heroes and villains goes deep, and there are guest appearances by the late Adam West and Gilbert Gottfried, and, more questionably, Kevin Smith and Conan O’Brien. I played plenty more open-world busywork here, but the environments are more polished than the first attempt. Of course I had to 100% it, what do you take me for, a fool? Right now, I would recommend this as the LEGO Batman to play.
23. Sonic Adventure DX – March 9
Whatever opinion you have about the Sonic Adventure games will invariably set off a land mine within the internet. For all its awkward technical elements, "so bad it's good" voice acting, and general age, the game shocked me with how fun it still is to play. This is the only 3D Sonic in my eyes that attempted to translate the 2D level design, and it does so with remarkable success. Sonic's levels are very replayable thanks to extra paths that reward you for mastery and zippy controls. While there are the big set piece moments that play themselves (I put the controller down and Sonic ran away from the whale anyway), they’re used as punctuation between exploratory sections where you can still test your speed. I also want to challenge the narrative of "Sonic good, everyone else bad." I enjoyed the campaigns of every character save for Big. And if you skip all the custscenes, Big's story is like 20 minutes. The flaws of Sonic Adventure are obvious and well-known. It could use a remake that streamlines a lot. But in its ideal state now, on PC with the Dreamcast Conversion mod, there's a good amount of joy still to be had.
24. The Gunk – March 10
The Gunk feels like a missed opportunity. It has serviceable puzzle-solving and light exploration, which can feel rewarding. That said, I always felt distant from the world somehow. I needed some more impact from sucking up the gunk. The dialogue is sometimes humorous, but the characters are rather one-note. It's written with a British dialect in mind, yet the actors don't have the accent. It's a short game, so you won't be angry about wasting your time. It just took me a lot of sessions because I wasn’t being engaged the way I was hoping to.
25. The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles – March 12
If you live outside of Japan, you can only buy the Great Ace Attorney games bundled together. I strongly suggest playing them back-to-back, as the momentum from the first story carries into the second, leading to an exciting conclusion. Great Ace Attorney 2 puts a lot of focus into revelations. The narrative is full of backstories and betrayals that give more weight to the already-endearing characters. My favorite part of the series is always the last case, where plot threads converge and the smuggest villains are battled. Even if some things push the suspension of disbelief, I loved how the story concluded. I was glued to the screen so much that it’s silly to remember I was hesitant to play a game without Phoenix Wright in it.
26. Super Mario 3D Land – March 14
I felt bad for not playing 3D Land since I’ve finished the rest of the 3D Mario games. It’s fun and engrossing even when you mean to just get through a few levels. The unfortunate problem is that it ultimately hasn’t left a strong footprint. Some of its mechanics were taken from Galaxy, and everything new it does was repackaged and refined in the sequel 3D World. The return of Racoon Mario also wasn’t the slam dunk they were hoping for. In short, there’s nothing you can point to and say, “that’s my favorite thing that’s only in 3D Land.” If you don’t care about that and just want a great platformer, I can’t remember a bad moment in the whole adventure. I wasn’t pushed to go through its second set of worlds, though.
27. Jet Force Gemini – March 17
Oh yeah… this is where things get interesting. As superfans might remember, last year I set the goal of getting all the achievements in Rare Replay, which also means 75% Gamerscore in each of the included Xbox 360 titles. I took a break around the N64 last year, and I picked up the challenge again around this time. I won’t go into too much detail on this list, because I plan to give it a massive write-up when I do finish (hopefully not too long now). I do have some high-level thoughts I can preview here, though.
Jet Force is kind of a bummer because there's no half-commitment. Beating it and getting 100% is functionally the same thing. The process of replaying levels with all the characters to track down all the junk is arduous and sometimes frustrating. It was definitely designed for the strategy guide. Boss fights are also a crapshoot due to unclear hitboxes, though placing the character on a rail there is a good choice. I do appreciate the new controls, which maps more sensibly onto a modern controller. Despite ample ideas, the experience is just not smooth enough for what's asked. I hate to be the “hasn’t aged well” guy, but here we are.
28. Perfect Dark HD – March 20
This updated release is moves well and doesn't waste your time. There are so many guns here, and the majority are fun to use. I also enjoy the length of the campaign levels; they become quite fast once you learn them. The Goldeneye style of difficulty, adding extra objectives, is still an inspired idea that should be more common. And if you're here for multiplayer, it includes a paralyzing amount of customization. The only knocks I have include a lack of signposting in certain missions causing me to wander around and the fact that the story lost me pretty early. The audio mix wasn't great, so I'm not sure if I missed some key lines or if we really did just end up in new locations without explanation. I appreciate the desire to freshen things up unbound from the 007 license, but I prefer espionage to aliens.
29. Grabbed by the Ghoulies – March 28
The kindest thing to say about Grabbed by the Ghoulies is that it's hardly aged at all. Its cel-shaded graphics are still appealing, and the gameplay is almost always functional. The flip side of that is, it wasn't exactly lighting up the world when it first came out, either. Rare's obligatory charm is present, of course. However, despite the many flavors of challenges attempting to diversify the experience, you really are just doing the same thing the entire time. Fighting is not precise due to the quasi-dual stick control scheme. While you can get the hang of it and eventually master the game, not enough variety justifies its already short length. And if you're someone who hates a lot of weird cartoon vocalizations, steer clear of Grabbed by the Ghoulies.
30. Kirby and the Forgotten Land – March 29
Kirby is one of the first franchises I felt real ownership over when I was a kid. Its highs are awesome, and its lows are still pretty good most of the time. Forgotten Land is theoretically a huge shift for Kirby: the first 3D title in the main series. In practice, it still feels like Kirby… in a good way. Your selection of copy abilities is leaner than what you might be used to, but each is thoughtfully adapted to the third dimension. On top of that, you have mouthful mode, where Kirby takes on the properties of increasingly strange objects. Forgotten Land defies the reputation of simplistic design by rewarding players who pay close attention. Every level has secrets that require smart usage of the mechanics to uncover. Building a town of Waddle Dees is delightfully adorable, although these are the same creatures Kirby has no problem massacring any other day. Finally, the story takes more of a back seat this time… until the last moments, where it speeds away like a truck. Kirby has always been great as something that can captivate kids but still engage more experienced players. After diminishing returns for a period, this entry is a strong sign that things are on the upswing again.
31. Perfect Dark Zero – April 4
31a. But the pain was just beginning…
Oh good lord…
I have to save my full thoughts on Perfect Dark Zero for its own dedicated blog post. In fact, I’ve already written it in full and will release it when the time comes. Let’s stay at the highest level possible:
If you play the campaign once, Perfect Dark Zero is a C- shooter that doesn’t capitalize on its own series.
If you achievement hunt, like my dumb ass committed to, you’re facing a time sink the likes of which I was fully unprepared for. I’ll explain all the tribulations down the road.
And maybe it was just because I was looking up a lot about it, so it got in my algorithm, or maybe it was anticipation for the upcoming Perfect Dark… but I saw a weird amount of other content around the game pop up while I was playing it. A weird synchronicity of the universe? Perhaps. I’m just glad it’s firmly behind me. Forever.
32. NORCO – April 17
I don’t know how much I can contribute to a discussion about NORCO. I don’t remember everything about the plot beats nor the themes. I have no background in Christianity, so all the allusions to that scene flew right over my head. I do remember strong characters and moments, though. Each of the party members you gain and lose is entertaining, especially the detective in the last act. The cult of Best Buy shirt kids is funny, but it hits especially hard at a phenomenon that is only becoming more dangerous as social media mutates into unrecognizable forms. NORCO has a good mood throughout its short runtime and hits a pretty good range on the aesthetic/didactic scale that I have just invented to judge these narrative games.
33. Finding Paradise – April 27
This was the week where I was visiting family, so I only had my Switch and laptop with me. I decided to bust out some really short games living in my backlog that I had ignored for years. That started with the sequels to To the Moon, which rustled up a lot less attention than the first title as far as I’m aware. I don’t even remember buying them, to be honest.
Finding Paradise came out at a time when the indie revolution was in a totally different place, yet it still feels quite old. The RPG Maker graphics are cheap-looking, and the dialogue has a strong tinge of fan fiction style, if you know what I’m talking about. I felt like I was retreading a lot of the same ground from the first game. This time, though, there’s no novelty to it. While the series has a great science fiction premise, it would be better in the hands of more proficient writers. I love to write, but like I said at the top, sometimes it’s hard as hell to get it done. I don’t mean to insult anyone. But their style hasn’t changed, and the artificiality of each line keeps me from truly investing in these characters.
34. Impostor Factory – April 27
Okay, then… what if we got rid of all those characters? Impostor Factory begins seemingly disconnected from everything, starting on a supernatural mystery scene that gradually folds back into the overarching plot. That said, it doesn’t actually advance the plot, serving as backstory instead. To the game’s credit, I enjoyed the comedic moments more here. They just tend to be inserted in what would otherwise be the most dramatic scenes. It’s an odd choice. My biggest takeaway from the narrative was one that has nothing to do with science fiction. The protagonist is put in a heartbreaking situation that could really happen, and I wondered what I might do in her place. After that, the story devolves into simulation theory, alternate selves, and a whole mess of stuff I just wasn’t into. I think I’m done with this series. It’s spun its wheels for too long, and the world is moving around it.
35. Mega Man X – April 27
I got all the way to the last boss the first time I tackled Mega Man X, but I couldn’t quite get over the finish line. Since it’s a quick playthrough, I had no problem making it back in one sitting. This time, I begrudgingly made sure to get all the upgrades, making quick work of Sigma’s early forms. No need to get into that rant again. You don’t need me to tell you this, but Mega Man X is fun. Common consensus tells me it’s actually the best of the whole X subseries. Basically, I don’t need to make time to try the other ones. It’s also more approachable than a lot of the other Mega Man games I’ve played, so I wouldn’t be surprised if I go back for another round in the future.
36. Mega Man 10 – April 30
If Mega Man X is too much roman numeral for you, try Mega Man 10! I heard that people like 9 more than 10, so I played 10 first because I’m weird like that. And tragically, having played some of 9, I can’t differentiate them in my head. I can’t remember which levels go to which game. I suppose that’s part of the reason 10 didn’t have the same impact. Mega Man 11, though… I like that one a lot. They should make a Mega Man 12. Is that too much Mega Man? Probably too much for this blog post.
37. Super Meat Boy – April 30
Another one I got close to the end of and fizzled out. But that was so long ago in my gaming development. I’ve beaten Celeste multiple times now! Surely Meat Boy would be chump change. I gotta say, the fact that I could use my same cloud save from like eight years and three machines ago is so nice. I only needed to complete a few levels and then the final boss. It took a little while, to be sure, but my powers ensured that I won in the end. Meat Boy is slippery, so getting a handle on exactly how he will behave is tricky. Then again, it had been a long time. I learned that defeating a game you almost beat in the past can feel more rewarding than finishing one all at once. And I did it all with keyboard controls, despite the game strongly recommending against it. That’s how I started, and I’ll be damned if I give into pressure now. All the extra hard levels, though… nah, I’m gonna give that a miss.
38. SEGA AGES OutRun – April 30
Rounding out the most productive week in my gaming history is another SEGA AGES release for the Switch. I love the music and vibes of OutRun, but I wasn’t drawn to it as much as Space Harrier back then. Firstly, I thought the time limit was really strict in the arcade version. Second, the animation of the car flipping over is weirdly horrifying to me. That’s not even a thing with me in other media, it’s just that specific crash. Anyway, I gave myself the assists I needed and took a nice cruise through the landscape. Look, it’s 50 games, not all of them are going to have some big story attached.
Side note: I’m playing the SEGA Genesis Picross game at the moment, and the use of OutRun music while solving puzzles really adds to it.
39. Star Wars: Rogue Squadron II: Rogue Leader – May 9
Now back in my own home, I fired up the GameCube for the first time in a while for a game club on the My Life in Gaming Discord server. The first time I tried Rogue Leader, years ago, I couldn’t get anywhere. I put in the cheat to unlock all the levels, and surprise surprise, that didn’t help me. As a more dedicated and skilled individual, I defeated the Empire after a still-significant amount of struggle. One mission I fought against was with the Star Destroyer. Then, in the penultimate level, there are two of them! This is getting out of hand!! (This is a Star Wars joke) The final run at the Death Star II was especially frustrating since you have very limited room for error before you or the Falcon get blown to smithereens. Frustrations with mission design aside, Rogue Leader still looks great, especially for a launch title. The glow up from the first Rogue Squadron is staggering. While I doubt that I’ll be returning to achieve… any… medals, I could see myself tooling around and shooting TIEs on a rainy day.
40. Max Payne – May 13
When I play old games for the first time, I'm always bracing to put up with some frustrating edges that modernity has sanded down. Surprisingly, though, Max Payne is as fun to play now as when it came out more than 20 years ago. I played the Xbox port, and while I was prepared to deal with set checkpoints, quicksaving is retained and lightning fast. Everything should have quicksaves! This relieved so much pressure and gave me room to experiment with the mechanics. Bullet time is slightly more than a gimmick. You can use it to get the drop on unsuspecting goons and make yourself survive longer.
Another way Max Payne has survived the test of time is through its graphic novel presentation. They're obviously more cost-effective than fully rendered cutscenes, and the few in-engine scenes that exist reinforce the decision with their goofiness. The level design is also strong, with naturalistic environments that leave room to explore while also funneling you to the next shootout. Well, this was what I thought until I got to the dream sequence where you balance on a tightrope maze of blood with a baby wailing at you. That's like a trifecta of frustration. And just when I thought that was the low point, you do it again in slow motion! That indiscretion aside, the unconventional choices in Max Payne set it apart, giving it an instantly recognizable identity that insulates it from the tides of time.
41. SpongeBob’s Truth or Square – May 16
The SpongeBob games of my youth were primarily on the PC. They were very different from the console titles, yet shared the same names, which made talking to other kids about them confusing. Regardless, Truth or Square was another Game with Gold fairly recently. I figured it was better to play it for a few hours than let it sit there. Made by the studio that created the most renowned SpongeBob games, Truth or Square has a distinct air of limited time and budget. Under those restrictions, it’s commendable that there are no major issues I ran into. Each level is loosely themed around an episode of the show, with the premise being a trip through SpongeBob’s memories to find where he hid the secret formula. Truth or Square is the perfect example of a game that I never would have paid for but ended up with anyway. I have a lot of those, and this is a fine one of them.
42. LEGO Star Wars: The Skywalker Saga – May 21
As the culmination of the entire series thus far, Skywalker Saga is very successful at updating the overused LEGO template while not throwing out anything that makes it fun. That starts with the ability to toggle mumble mode for the classic LEGO experience. Shockingly, though, I stuck mostly to the voice acting. It's much more effective at using lines from the movies than prior attempts. Having the Clone Wars actors helps, too. The lower camera angle and humbler pool of powers grounds Skywalker Saga more than any previous entry. Instead of playing with toys from up high, you're given a minifig's-eye view, immersing you into the galaxy. My major criticism is the uneven distribution of levels. Every movie has five, but many are short vehicle stages. The levels are all shorter in general, making the stories even more abridged than usual. In Phantom Menace, for example, three out of five take place during the movie's climax. True, nothing much happens in Episode I until then, but this isn't their first time adapting these movies.
If you're into hunting for collectables, you will experience a veritable feast here. For the first time, I actually prefer the open world parts to the bespoke levels. That’s because they just made Super Mario Odyssey within the Star Wars galaxy. I appreciate how the designers let you make your own fun by exploiting Boba Fett’s jetpack or lifting droids with the Force to sequence break areas. You’ll run around nearly every planet from the movies, scooping up over 1000 special bricks and gazillions of studs. Your favorite Star Wars character is playable, even if it’s one of the really obscure ones. The scope of exploration is gargantuan, far beyond anything that’s been in the series before. And while I happily threw away many hours hopping between planets and snooping around, I want to stress that I will only do this once. If they make a game of the same scale in Middle-Earth or something, I’m not biting. Reporting has made clear that these games are not being made sustainably for employees, so here’s hoping that things improve and the scope creep is resolved. The series has a special place in my heart. I want the best for the passionate people who create it.
43. Shadow of the Colossus (PS4) – May 28
No one is going to hate me for this, are they? Alright, I’m just gonna say it. Everyone who got hurt in this game deserved it and I’m glad they died. Yes, yes, it’s a seminal title for the medium, Roger Ebert, etc. But every creature, from the biggest Colossus to the smallest lizard, pissed me off. I tried to go into every encounter with an open mind, and some were mostly great fights. However, there was almost always something that got in the way of the fun. I hated when the game took away control at the worst times and threw me off Colossi to repeat the same arduous process to get back on. I dreaded having to manipulate their AI in very specific spots that didn’t work half the time. I pointed and laughed when I felled the beasts, which is obviously the opposite of the intended reaction. Bluepoint’s rendition of the world is undeniably beautiful, but I got turned around so often I nearly gave up. And don’t get me started on the worst boss of them all, the horse. Games with a higher purpose tend to get more slack for their moment-to-moment play, which I usually grant. They also tend to control in more unusual ways. I’ve played countless third-person action titles with swords and climbing, so I’m not willing to forgive the unresponsiveness. I see what you’re doing, Shadow of the Colossus, but I respect you a lot more than I like you.
44. Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode 1 – May 30
It's.... well, it just isn't good. Right away, you'll notice how poor the physics feel. Everyone has seen that you can stand at a 45-degree angle and spin dash up a slope. Beyond that, Sonic's rate of acceleration feels terrible. The strong control felt in the classic series is nowhere to be seen. Episode 1 is like a cover band, rehashing old zones and bosses cheaply and much worse. The new gimmicks are never exciting, either. It's not the worst Sonic by any stretch, but Mania effectively wiped it from existence, which is for the better.
45. Streets of Rage – June 1
AKA: It’s Rewind Time. I didn’t feel like getting whupped over and over, so I cheated my way through it. The first Streets of Rage is no one’s favorite anyway, right? It’s clearly a very basic beat-em-up, but you travel through fun locations in the city. The music is boppin’. But like with a lot of old games, I don’t think your guy has the finesse to avoid all the attacks from enemies. That’s why I was fine using the tools the Genesis collection gave me. There are a whole bunch of other titles in that collection that are good fodder for lists like these, but this is pretty much it for now.
46. Guardians of the Galaxy – June 6
Talk about a pleasant surprise. No one was expecting much from this before release, but I played it on Game Pass and enjoyed almost all of it. Without the Gunn movies, I doubt Guardians of the Galaxy would have any brand recognition. The game is beholden to the films, but it sneakily unveils its own version of the team that I might prefer depending on the day. I initially bristled at how talkative everyone was, but that gave way to respect at the massive volume of lines and the consistency at which they are delivered. The game part of the game is perhaps least impressive, with enemy variety especially dropping off a cliff by the end. Admittedly, I got distracted and took some long breaks before I finally reached credits, but the story fully hooked me in the last hours. If you can forgive some occasional bugginess and derivative character designs, I strongly recommend experiencing Eidos’s take on the Guardians.
47. Space Invaders: Infinity Gene – June 13
"DEDICATED TO EVERYONE WHO LOVES GAMES AND CHARLES DARWIN"
Now that's something I haven't read before. Infinity Gene's gimmick of near-constant gameplay evolution is intriguing, even if it feels a little basic in practice. You start off shooting those iconic little aliens, but you soon take on titanic battleships and unnerving life forms. My biggest problem is reading it - everything is white, so in the very common occurrence where the screen is plastered with enemies, keeping track of their shots is near-impossible, which leads to a good deal of questionable deaths. Fortunately, you evolve options to help you out, and checkpoints are placed so that most people should be able to get through. This was another one from Games with Gold.
48. Sonic Adventure 2: Battle – June 14
After a momentary distraction, it was time to return to 3D Sonic. Even without putting my hands on the controller, I had seen Sonic Adventure 2 so many times that I already had big opinions on it. Yep, they didn’t change. If there’s a way for Sonic stories to take themselves seriously and pull it off, you won’t find it here. The plot is a tonal mess and filled with holes. So is the previous game, but Adventure 1 is more openly fun, or at least it seems that way to me. The only time I want to see these cutscenes is if Eggman pisses on the moon. I skipped them this time.
Sonic’s level design is already a significant departure from what I like about Adventure 1. His levels are all tubes that funnel him forward and favor twitch timing. You really have to go out of your way to find anything off the critical path. Tails’s levels are just as narrow, only significantly slower and you have to listen to beeping the whole time. The Knuckles stages are worse than their previous iteration not only because of their huge sizes but because the radar tracks only one emerald piece at a time. I forgot to mod the game to fix that. The room for expression is gone in all three styles. When I see the lifeless level design in something like Sonic Forces, I feel like it all comes from here. The soundtrack is also not as good!
Lastly, I know a lot of Sonic fans started out with Adventure 2 and they think Shadow is the coolest character. I’m here to break a hard truth to you. Shadow is quoted as saying, “I’m the coolest.” As everyone knows, claiming you are cool actually means you are not cool at all. Sorry.
49. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Shredder’s Revenge – June 20
We’re well into the second decade of retro revivals occupying a significant portion of the gaming landscape. Over the years, it’s become clear that the factor to make them succeed isn’t the developers coming back to their old ideas, but the passion surrounding the experiences of the retro age. TMNT: Shredder’s Revenge is about the best you could possibly hope for when it comes to celebrating the Ninja Turtles and their beat-em-ups. I don’t care that much about the Turtles outside of the first movie and some of the comics, but even a layman can tell that Tribute Games put 110% love into Shredder’s Revenge. The animation is beautiful enough to convince you the actual cartoon looked good. Its visuals pop off the screen, and every character is brimming with personality. Fighting is simple enough to enjoy if you haven’t played games in years. At the same time, exciting mechanics like super meter and co-op moves mean nuance is there for those that want it. The music by Tee Lopes, while stylistically different, is always up-tempo and driving. He was an appropriate choice, because not since Sonic Mania has a game so brazenly and delightfully reveled in its retro roots.
50. Contra Anniversary Collection – June 21
50 a, b, c, d, etc… all those Contras
Another retro collection that had just been sitting on my Switch. I worked on all the games in it over time. For me, the Contra series will always have a strong association with This Is the Run. Unlike that, I don’t need to beat it all “legit,” so I liberally used save states to get through most of them. I’ve gone back and forth a lot over save states and whether they count for beating a game. Ultimately, I landed on this: If I want to experience the releases people label as important, I’m fine doing so as a tourist. I can experience the ride and be done without hating myself. For my first playthrough, I think that is the most fun way I can do it. And if it’s not fun, why bother? I’m not trying to prove myself to anyone. Finally, those games aren’t going anywhere. For titles I really connect with, I’ll be happy to revisit it down the line in a harder fashion. Whew, sorry for the rant. I chat with a lot of people who can get gatekeepy at times, so I had to put it all out there.
The standout title in the whole Contra collection is Hard Corps, as I’m sure many will agree. It’s one giant clap back to the ex-Konami staff who went over to Treasure. There’s a new wild boss fight every few minutes, and the creativity never ceases to surprise. The American version decided to spit in your eye with one-hit deaths. If you’re not into save states, the collection also has the friendlier Japanese version, and the European version where everyone is a robot. The other Contra games are fun, too. I like Operation C a lot, considering most Game Boy versions of popular franchises were steep downgrades. Contra is simple and cheap at times, but the series is a good way to kill half an hour. And you can actually buy these, not just… subscribe to them.
9800 words later, it’s 50 mini-reviews in the books and a blog debt repaid in my eyes. If you read the whole thing… I simply don’t believe you, sorry. I will not be doing this for the second six months of 2022, but I will do it for another list of 50 games. This was a lot more work than I had expected, and I haven’t even begun the next one, so you may be waiting a bit for it. In the meantime, be kind to your fellow person, enjoy your gaming, and let me know what you thought. Bye!
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