Female gamers and jerks who bother us

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Sarkhan

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#1  Edited By Sarkhan

Hello:) 
 
I always wonderd why guys seems to be so hostile to us female gamers. May it be fps, fighting and even dual of the planeswalkers. My secondary profil is my full name with only 1 letter as last name, and while playing this(as i mostly do) i find ppl just beeing jerkd. Ofc you can sort the "young ppl" and so on. but in general. 
 
 
i main viper in SSf(who knew^^) and after i'v been defeated, i normaly get pm's like: Get back in the kitchen or read the manual first. My normaly reply is: Im just training and trying to figur out this character. we cant all be easymode shotos, now can we? " and i never hear from them again. 
 
So! thats why im asking. I never hear from ppl again, but i still get my inbox full of just jerks who wanna be funny or be....retarded(no offence) 
 
So..... can any male gamer here answear why, and can any female members share or tell how the hell you get out of it?
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HandsomeDead

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#2  Edited By HandsomeDead

Video games are for dweebs who got picked on in school so if they can't be the jock of the gridiron, they're the jock of the internet and if a girl threatens their masculinity, they need to lash out. Keep doing what you're doing and learn to love it.

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Sambambo

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#3  Edited By Sambambo

Get back in the kitchen.

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Sarkhan

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#4  Edited By Sarkhan
@ImaLizard said:
"

                    Learn to spell, we'll respect you when you do

                   

                "

I will after i live in a english country for a few years:)
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Video_Game_King

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#5  Edited By Video_Game_King

I'd say because games are kind of a guy's thing. Specifically, it's for guys who never had any luck with the girls. What do you think is going to happen when they see the one thing they can never touch?
 
On Giant Bomb, however, we've been around girls (specifically, Pepsiman and Symphony/PixelPrinny) long enough not to treat them like shit.

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Afroman269

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#6  Edited By Afroman269

A lot of guys online are still immature and insecure when a girl player is around. Also add the anonymity of the internet and you will receive insults. Also you should use some proper grammar in your post. Pretty hard to follow most of what you said.

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ImaLizard

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#7  Edited By ImaLizard
@Afroman269: afroman. howd you get so funkay?
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Sarkhan

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#8  Edited By Sarkhan
@Afroman269:
Yes, that seems to be the case in general. and it's a shame.
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Enigma777

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#9  Edited By Enigma777
@SuperSambo said:
" Get back in the kitchen. "
Srsly... that sammich isn't gonna make itself.
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#10  Edited By chrissedoff
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Jimbo

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#11  Edited By Jimbo

It's not like it's all hugs n handshakes between males on XBL - there's plenty of hostility on there to go around.  Are you having any trouble on Giant Bomb?

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Sarkhan

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#12  Edited By Sarkhan
@Video_Game_King said:
"

                    I'd say because games are kind of a guy's thing. Specifically, it's for guys who never had any luck with the girls. What do you think is going to happen when they see the one thing they can never touch?  On Giant Bomb, however, we've been around girls (specifically, Pepsiman and Symphony/PixelPrinny) long enough not to treat them like shit.

                   

                "

I dont 2know" those ppl as im not that much in the forums. Just today as the last pm just got me. But thanks for the info and your thoughts. and yes, i think you are right in general. I have 16 friends who are male on my list. And we always have funa nd joking. I added a few from SSF and DOTPW. Kicked 7 and hold 2.
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Turambar

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#13  Edited By Turambar
@Video_Game_King said:
" I'd say because games are kind of a guy's thing. Specifically, it's for guys who never had any luck with the girls. What do you think is going to happen when they see the one thing they can never touch?  On Giant Bomb, however, we've been around girls (specifically, Pepsiman and Symphony/PixelPrinny) long enough not to treat them like shit. "
Wait, they're chicks?  Time to hit them up for boob pics.
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Afroman269

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#14  Edited By Afroman269
@Vortexus1981: I suggest just playing without a mic on then. Guy or girl, playing online can get annoying. Now that I'm older, I'm getting more and more irritated with most of the online community. I just play with the mic off and mute half the players. I only talk when I'm rolling online with friends. 
 
@ImaLizard said:
" @Afroman269: afroman. howd you get so funkay? "
I be chillin and rollin them doobies, dawg.
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Sarkhan

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#15  Edited By Sarkhan
@Afroman269 said:
"

                    A lot of guys online are still immature and insecure when a girl player is around. Also add the anonymity of the internet and you will receive insults. Also you should use some proper grammar in your post. Pretty hard to follow most of what you said.

                   

                "

Yes. Im sorry bout that. But english is not my first(nor second OR third language) I just tried to ask a question.
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Sin4profit

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#16  Edited By Sin4profit

i don't play SSF4 online cause i'm terrible with fighting games but from my understanding is it's common to get some "smack talk". and if you let anything stand out in your profile, like your gender, then they'll use that as the basis of their smack talk. So with that game specifically, and a lot of competitive multiplayer games, you should expect that kind of behavior but don't take it too personally...otherwise you're justifying a reason for their aggravation over someone getting involved in their smack talk "culture".
 
guys are either overly excited when they meet up with girls on xbox live or they're aggressive towards the girl to desperately prove to themselves that they're not the "i'm exited every time a girl shows up" type. 
  
that's my take on it.

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PixelPrinny

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#17  Edited By PixelPrinny
@HandsomeDead said:

" Keep doing what you're doing and learn to love it. "

Yep, pretty much this.  
 
I get a kick out of the "get back to the kitchen" messages I've received since I like to imagine it's some pasty teenager or young adult who's popping a vein in their forehead as they write the best insult they can come up with while raging.  
 
As for getting out of it.. well you could always just not tell people you're a female gamer. It's not like people are required to pick gender-specific user names or wear big signs that announce their gender when they're playing (well, unless you use voice chat, I suppose, but only crazy people use it when not amongst friends. Hell, I have it globally turned off so I don't hafta hear weird strangers saying things I couldn't care less about or trying to troll games with annoying computer sounds or loud music). 
     
There's also the option to turn off incoming messages from people not on your friends list... at least on Xbox, not sure about PS3. *shrugs* Personally, I just say unless you are really offended by such things, just roll with it and have fun. Come up with witty replies and block/report them or post the messages on that website devoted to reporting silly sexist/racist messages people receive (I forget the name of the site, but I'm sure it can be Googled fairly easily and has been mentioned on GB a few times in the recent past)  or blog about em or whatever else floats your boat. 
 
@Video_Game_King said:

" On Giant Bomb, however, we've been around girls (specifically, Pepsiman and Symphony/PixelPrinny) long enough not to treat them like shit. "

Oh hey, random name drop. :P
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Dany

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#18  Edited By Dany

The anonymity of the internet allows anyone to be an asshole. They don't respond because they want to get a quick 'laugh' and go ruin the fun for someone else.

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FancySoapsMan

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#19  Edited By FancySoapsMan

I don't ever bother anyone I'm playing with unless they're a cunt.

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Sarkhan

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#20  Edited By Sarkhan
@Sin4profit said:
"

                    i don't play SSF4 online cause i'm terrible with fighting games but from my understanding is it's common to get some "smack talk". and if you let anything stand out in your profile, like your gender, then they'll use that as the basis of their smack talk. So with that game specifically, and a lot of competitive multiplayer games, you should expect that kind of behavior but don't take it too personally...otherwise you're justifying a reason for their aggravation over someone getting involved in their smack talk "culture". guys are either overly excited when they meet up with girls on xbox live or they're aggressive towards the girl to desperately prove to themselves that they're not the "i'm exited every time a girl shows up" type.   that's my take on it.

                   

                "

Well said, and thanks for your input:) No, i dont take it personaly. It's mainly just annoying. But i love beating them after a pm though^^ But i think you came close to nailing the pin here:)
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Ley_Lines

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#21  Edited By Ley_Lines
@Jimbo said:
" It's not like it's all hugs n handshakes between males on XBL - there's plenty of hostility on there to go around.  Are you having any trouble on Giant Bomb? "
This. Jerks are jerks to everyone. Not everyone not even most, but at least one is a jerk with a loud mouth. The insults you get are just germane to you and your gender. When you win, most people aren't going to message you a compliment.
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Scooper

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#22  Edited By Scooper
@Vortexus1981 said:
"My normaly reply is: "
There's the mistake you're making. Don't bother replying. 
 
Also Viper's like the hardest character in the game to play. I can barely play her lol.
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ReyGitano

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#23  Edited By ReyGitano

The internet is filled with all kinds of idiots, but I won't apologize for them. 
That's not my job, and it's not my fault; it's theirs.
You make sacrifices when you use the power of online gaming, and unfortunately that's one of them. Hope you stick around and learn to not care like the rest of us, otherwise you're in for hell. 
If it makes you feel better, idiots are hostile towards all of us, not just women.

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mike

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#24  Edited By mike

I'm equally irritated with guys who treat female gamers poorly as I am with female gamers who feel the need to advertise that they're female. The whole "GamerChix" nonsense and all-female gaming clans are part of the problem, not the solution.    
 
Just play games, I don't need or care to know what your gender is. If it comes up online because you have a tag that makes it obvious you're a female (which I don't know why you would), just ignore the jerks, mute them, and don't respond to their messages. 

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FLStyle

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#25  Edited By FLStyle
@Vortexus1981: Agreed with the comments so far, all I have to add is that sadly it won't end so you should try to focus on the regular guys instead of the immature ones. There's plenty of regular guys here.
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Sarkhan

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#26  Edited By Sarkhan
@Scooper said:
"

                    @Vortexus1981 said:
"My normaly reply is: "
There's the mistake you're making. Don't bother replying.  Also Viper's like the hardest character in the game to play. I can barely play her lol.

                   

                "

Yes. I kinda know, but after 10-16-17 pms, you just want to say something. and yes. C.Vipers is hard as hell. But i dont want to be a "shoto". there are 35 characters in SSF4. 90%(my mind) uses 4-6 characters. I want to use the hard/overlooked one. BTW: Chokoblanka(female ssf4 player) look her up^^ 
 
But yes. Maybe i should just not reply. But then again. You male gamers, can you not reply after a "diss"? For me it took about 15-17 pms(just tonight) but how do you deal with this?
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GreggD

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#27  Edited By GreggD
@MB said:
"I'm equally irritated with guys who treat female gamers poorly as I am with female gamers who feel the need to advertise that they're female. The whole "GamerChix" nonsense and all-female gaming clans are part of the problem, not the solution.     Just play games, I don't need or care to know what your gender is. If it comes up online because you have a tag that makes it obvious you're a female (which I don't know why you would), just ignore the jerks, mute them, and don't respond to their messages.  "

This, pretty much. Also, you are very good at cosplay. Spitting image of Crimson Viper, if you ask me.
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frankxiv

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#28  Edited By frankxiv

i'm a male and people are jerks to me all the time. i think people are just jerks? food for thought.

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Gizmo

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#29  Edited By Gizmo

Blame Hip Hop Gamer, he probably wants to video interview you now and do a section on his website about how good he thinks you would be at giving head. 

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Sarkhan

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#30  Edited By Sarkhan
@PixelPrinny said:
"

                    @HandsomeDead said:

" Keep doing what you're doing and learn to love it.

                   

                "

Yep, pretty much this.  
 
I get a kick out of the "get back to the kitchen" messages I've received since I like to imagine it's some pasty teenager or young adult who's popping a vein in their forehead as they write the best insult they can come up with while raging.  
 
As for getting out of it.. well you could always just not tell people you're a female gamer. It's not like people are required to pick gender-specific user names or wear big signs that announce their gender when they're playing (well, unless you use voice chat, I suppose, but only crazy people use it when not amongst friends. Hell, I have it globally turned off so I don't hafta hear weird strangers saying things I couldn't care less about or trying to troll games with annoying computer sounds or loud music). 
     
There's also the option to turn off incoming messages from people not on your friends list... at least on Xbox, not sure about PS3. *shrugs* Personally, I just say unless you are really offended by such things, just roll with it and have fun. Come up with witty replies and block/report them or post the messages on that website devoted to reporting silly sexist/racist messages people receive (I forget the name of the site, but I'm sure it can be Googled fairly easily and has been mentioned on GB a few times in the recent past)  or blog about em or whatever else floats your boat. 
 
@Video_Game_King said:

" On Giant Bomb, however, we've been around girls (specifically, Pepsiman and Symphony/PixelPrinny) long enough not to treat them like shit.

                   

                "

Oh hey, random name drop. :P

                   

                "

Thank you. No, i dont think there is a way to sort friends pm from everybody pm. But as you said. Nobody forced me to use my real name. I just wanted to show that there are female gamers and its ridiculous that you should hide it. But i take your tips. i will try to give a comeback now and then, but in general i just ignor.
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Gerhabio

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#31  Edited By Gerhabio

Yes, you are right, gamers worldwide tend to see their hobby as something of a patriarchal thing. I suppose when they see a girl playing they can't help but react. Sometimes they'll  get excited that a woman shares their same interest and bother her with false hopes of forming a relationship or simply getting some acknowledgement and interaction from the opposite sex. Other times (most often) you get people who do not like their patriarchy to be disturbed and will actively try to keep gaming male. And finally some might just not care and just interact on the merits of your play style or gaming experience. 
 
I gotta say, I do wish gamers were a little bit more varied. People in Giant Bomb tend to fall into the same categories of Male, 15-25, White, upper middle class. There's nothing wrong with that but it does limit outlooks and possibilities, even for a topic such as video games. Glad you're here!

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mike

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#32  Edited By mike
@Vortexus1981: How do these people even know you're a female? Are you talking to them with a headset or does your gamertag/PSN ID make it obvious?
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MEATBALL

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#33  Edited By MEATBALL

If you're stereotyping then I'd say that guys playing online are hostile online to everyone.

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SaltyPancakes

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#34  Edited By SaltyPancakes

I'm a douche bag to everybody and I love it! Jerks are jerks to everybody, females just have obvious history, anatomy and physiology  to make fun of just like jerks being racist or hateful against the disabled. MAN UP LADIES!

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Sarkhan

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#35  Edited By Sarkhan
@MB said:
"

                    @Vortexus1981: How do these people even know you're a female? Are you talking to them with a headset or does your gamertag/PSN ID make it obvious?

                   

                "

I have my name as my psn. that is my fault as i thought that would be my profil, not my tag.
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FluxWaveZ

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#36  Edited By FluxWaveZ

Pff, girls don't play games.

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Scooper

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#37  Edited By Scooper
@Vortexus1981 said:
" @Scooper said:
"

                    @Vortexus1981 said:
"My normaly reply is: "
There's the mistake you're making. Don't bother replying.  Also Viper's like the hardest character in the game to play. I can barely play her lol.

                   

                "
Yes. I kinda know, but after 10-16-17 pms, you just want to say something. and yes. C.Vipers is hard as hell. But i dont want to be a "shoto". there are 35 characters in SSF4. 90%(my mind) uses 4-6 characters. I want to use the hard/overlooked one. BTW: Chokoblanka(female ssf4 player) look her up^^  But yes. Maybe i should just not reply. But then again. You male gamers, can you not reply after a "diss"? For me it took about 15-17 pms(just tonight) but how do you deal with this? "
Well the guys that diss others are just loosers anyway. 
 
And yeah, ChokoBlanka's a beast. I play DeeJay myself, I got bored with the same old shoto nonsense myself.
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Raven10

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#38  Edited By Raven10

Well I don't play many games online, but when I do I don't use a mic and mute everyone in the game. I don't want to hear any smack talk or insults. Guys get upset when girls beat them at guy things. Something about pride and manliness. I try not to get involved. If a girl beats me at a game I find that pretty hot. No need to feel shame just because you lost. It's just a game. Plenty of more serious things to fail at than playing a game. So I say just ignore them because they are only insulting you because they feel insecure because you beat them. Just know that you upset them and feel some pride about that.

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Gerhabio

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#39  Edited By Gerhabio
@Vortexus1981 said:
" @Afroman269 said:
"

                    A lot of guys online are still immature and insecure when a girl player is around. Also add the anonymity of the internet and you will receive insults. Also you should use some proper grammar in your post. Pretty hard to follow most of what you said.

                   

                "
Yes. Im sorry bout that. But english is not my first(nor second OR third language) I just tried to ask a question. "
Wait... How many languages do you know? Which ones?  
 
Also, you shouldn't even dignify that Grammar Nazi gibberish with a response.
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BraveToaster

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#40  Edited By BraveToaster

Don't let anyone know you're a female. Problem solved.

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Sarkhan

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#41  Edited By Sarkhan
@G3RHRT said:
"

                    @Vortexus1981 said:
"

                    @Afroman269 said:
"

                    A lot of guys online are still immature and insecure when a girl player is around. Also add the anonymity of the internet and you will receive insults. Also you should use some proper grammar in your post. Pretty hard to follow most of what you said.

                   

                "
Yes. Im sorry bout that. But english is not my first(nor second OR third language) I just tried to ask a question.

                   

                "
Wait... How many languages do you know? Which ones?   Also, you shouldn't even dignify that Grammar Nazi gibberish with a response.

                   

                "

I speak 3, and i type 4....or 3 and a half as it seems^^
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Sarkhan

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#42  Edited By Sarkhan
@Axxol said:
"

                    Don't let anyone know you're a female. Problem solved.

                   

                "

You are right:) But wrong...?:( As why should gender even be a thing?
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BraveToaster

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#43  Edited By BraveToaster
@Vortexus1981 said:

" @Axxol said:

"

                    Don't let anyone know you're a female. Problem solved.

                   

                "
You are right:) But wrong...?:( As why should gender even be a thing? "
Gender shouldn't be a "thing", but the harassment won't end until you stop playing games or keep your gender private. 
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Sarkhan

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#44  Edited By Sarkhan
@Axxol said:
"

                    @Vortexus1981 said:

" @Axxol said:

"

                    Don't let anyone know you're a female. Problem solved.

                   

                "
You are right:) But wrong...?:( As why should gender even be a thing?

                   

                "
Gender shouldn't be a "thing", but the harassment won't end until you stop playing games or keep your gender private. 

                   

                "

Well said. I really think you said it there. But tbh....it's still verry sad that this still is a thing.
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GreggD

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#45  Edited By GreggD

I've got a legitimate question for the TC, if nobody objects. Pretty soon I'm going to be getting into Super Street Fighter IV on a deeper level, or at least I'm going to attempt to. My main is Fei Long. Do I stand a chance against the online community, if I can learn and get better?
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frankxiv

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#46  Edited By frankxiv

a fun experiment would be to make a male/masculine name and play on that and compare the hate levels. play like a week on your regular girly girl name and then play a week on the male name and see which gets more messages?

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Sarkhan

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#47  Edited By Sarkhan

Well, let me change from a woman In distress , into a fighting goddess^^ fei Long have some "strange" inputs, but on low lvl, yes, you should be fine:)
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#48  Edited By GreggD

Awesome. That's a good thing to hear.
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Bloodgraiv3

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#49  Edited By Bloodgraiv3
@FancySoapsMan said:
"I don't ever bother anyone I'm playing with unless they're a cunt. "

Pretty much this. 
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gamb1t

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#50  Edited By gamb1t
@Vortexus1981 said:
" Hello:)  I always wonderd why guys seems to be so hostile to us female gamers. May it be fps, fighting and even dual of the planeswalkers. My secondary profil is my full name with only 1 letter as last name, and while playing this(as i mostly do) i find ppl just beeing jerkd. Ofc you can sort the "young ppl" and so on. but in general.   i main viper in SSf(who knew^^) and after i'v been defeated, i normaly get pm's like: Get back in the kitchen or read the manual first. My normaly reply is: Im just training and trying to figur out this character. we cant all be easymode shotos, now can we? " and i never hear from them again.  So! thats why im asking. I never hear from ppl again, but i still get my inbox full of just jerks who wanna be funny or be....retarded(no offence)  So..... can any male gamer here answear why, and can any female members share or tell how the hell you get out of it? "
because you guys do things like this when men move along.