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Avatar image for ryan
Posted by Ryan (2278 posts) -

In case you missed it during our PAX Prime 2012 panel, we recently announced a loving, trust-based partnership with our friends behind the incredibly distasteful parlour game Cards Against Humanity, with a limited-edition Giant Bomb-themed expansion pack as the expected fruit of this eldritch coupling. For those not already familiar with Cards Against Humanity--either from its multipleThursday Night Throwdown appearances or its generally increasing cultural profile--it's essentially Apples to Apples or Mad Libs, but calibrated with Swiss precision for a nuclear brinksmanship level of offensiveness. So, you know, right up our alley.

As with the core Cards Against Humanity experience, crowdsourcing ideas for new cards for our expansion pack is an important part of the process, which is where you come in. There's a special page already up at Cards Against Humanity Dot Com where you can submit your stupid ideas--ideas that we will, no doubt, mock derisively when the Giant Bomb and Cards Against Humanity staffs (staves?) meet up to decide which cards will make the cut.

Feel free to submit any of your favorite Giant Bomb references, or just whatever funny, absurd, random, offensive thing that springs to mind, though know that one of our main goals here is to make an expansion worthy of one of our favorite games that'll be fun to play, even for those who don't know why that deer is wearing a wrestling mask, and don't care. (Example: me!)

Either way, whoever wins, we lose.

Staff
Avatar image for ryan
#1 Posted by Ryan (2278 posts) -

In case you missed it during our PAX Prime 2012 panel, we recently announced a loving, trust-based partnership with our friends behind the incredibly distasteful parlour game Cards Against Humanity, with a limited-edition Giant Bomb-themed expansion pack as the expected fruit of this eldritch coupling. For those not already familiar with Cards Against Humanity--either from its multipleThursday Night Throwdown appearances or its generally increasing cultural profile--it's essentially Apples to Apples or Mad Libs, but calibrated with Swiss precision for a nuclear brinksmanship level of offensiveness. So, you know, right up our alley.

As with the core Cards Against Humanity experience, crowdsourcing ideas for new cards for our expansion pack is an important part of the process, which is where you come in. There's a special page already up at Cards Against Humanity Dot Com where you can submit your stupid ideas--ideas that we will, no doubt, mock derisively when the Giant Bomb and Cards Against Humanity staffs (staves?) meet up to decide which cards will make the cut.

Feel free to submit any of your favorite Giant Bomb references, or just whatever funny, absurd, random, offensive thing that springs to mind, though know that one of our main goals here is to make an expansion worthy of one of our favorite games that'll be fun to play, even for those who don't know why that deer is wearing a wrestling mask, and don't care. (Example: me!)

Either way, whoever wins, we lose.

Loading Video...
Staff
Avatar image for wumbo3000
#2 Posted by wumbo3000 (1253 posts) -

That's insane.

Avatar image for deadmanforking
#3 Posted by Deadmanforking (587 posts) -

Hope.

Avatar image for galiant
#4 Posted by Galiant (2237 posts) -

Maybe I should get this when it's out. I don't have a deck yet.

Avatar image for jackhole
#5 Posted by Jackhole (407 posts) -

Floppy naturals

Avatar image for xmegadethxsly
#6 Posted by xMEGADETHxSLY (484 posts) -

CAME ON MYSLF

Avatar image for yummylee
#7 Posted by Yummylee (24646 posts) -

I love how this is filed under Baditude, given the recent debate.

Avatar image for huntad
#8 Posted by huntad (2348 posts) -

@Jackhole said:

Floppy naturals

If this isn't in the deck, I'm gonna be really disappointed.

Avatar image for hooded
#9 Posted by Hooded (495 posts) -

I sleep like a baby after bathing in a tub full of _______.

Avatar image for ironlink
#10 Posted by Ironlink (49 posts) -

So, will this be available outside USA and Canada? I find it quite ridiculous that they wont let Amazon ship their cards anywhere else.

Avatar image for papercut
#11 Posted by papercut (4109 posts) -

Why is this attached to Baditude ?

Online
Avatar image for dekkadekkadekka
#12 Posted by dekkadekkadekka (851 posts) -

"The kind of boner you get while watching a Sim die."

Avatar image for nickux
#13 Posted by nickux (1546 posts) -

Already thinking of some good (horrible) submissions. My only thing is I wish the submission page had a few more options like a checkbox to signify if you're writing a white or black card, do you write one card idea per submission, etc.

Avatar image for phatmac
#14 Posted by Phatmac (5931 posts) -

I'll try to not post stupid GiantBomb memes!

Avatar image for andrew2696
#15 Posted by andrew2696 (612 posts) -

I'm assuming Patrick has biggest, blackest dick covered? Screw it I'm using it again.

Avatar image for elixirbronze
#16 Posted by ElixirBronze (539 posts) -

Contributed with "Big ass ramp". don't know if it's funny or not just something half-related to giant bomb.

Avatar image for mordi
#17 Posted by mordi (582 posts) -

Should find some way to incorporate Big Jeffrey into this.

Avatar image for begilerath
#18 Posted by Begilerath (178 posts) -

@Hooded said:

I sleep like a baby after bathing in a tub full of _______.

Peter Molyneux

Avatar image for heatdrive88
#19 Posted by heatDrive88 (2962 posts) -

Just submitted:

"The tired look on Jeff Gerstmann's face when asked how to get into video games journalism."

Avatar image for lobstermobster
#20 Edited by LobsterMobster (97 posts) -

Secret Cave Hair

Avatar image for moncole
#21 Posted by Moncole (666 posts) -

"Nothing is bigger than Patricks hair except ________"

Avatar image for toug
#22 Posted by Toug (550 posts) -

Baditude.

Avatar image for shagge
#23 Posted by ShaggE (8447 posts) -

"A goddamn Dachshund."

Avatar image for isomeri
#24 Posted by isomeri (2826 posts) -

I'm really hoping that this won't be US-only.

Online
Avatar image for subrandom
#25 Posted by subrandom (145 posts) -

Gaming for me is a religion and Haze is the shit.

Avatar image for sonicrift
#26 Posted by sonicrift (330 posts) -

Will Smith's Cum Face

Avatar image for neondinosaur
#27 Posted by Otacon (2282 posts) -

Time to put my inhuman thinking cap on...

Avatar image for sergio
#28 Posted by Sergio (3541 posts) -

@sonicrift said:

Will Smith's Cum Face

That card should just have that image -- no text.

Avatar image for myketuna
#29 Posted by myketuna (1891 posts) -

"Naked cartoon pussy" must be a white card.

Not too sure about a black card. I really don't want to make it to "in-joke-y" because then no one but the community would "get" it.

Avatar image for jonnyboy
#30 Posted by jonnyboy (2867 posts) -

"Seven Hundred and Seventy Five Million Dollars."

Avatar image for myketuna
#31 Posted by myketuna (1891 posts) -

@sonicrift said:

Will Smith's Cum Face

This works on two levels. I love it.

Avatar image for angrywombat
#32 Posted by AngryWombat (4 posts) -

"I'm __________, and that looks fucked up."

Avatar image for random88
#33 Posted by Random88 (294 posts) -

Here are the ones I just submitted

White Cards

- Never being able to look your dog in the eyes again.

- Lauging outside an orphanage

- Breaking into a zoo to steal a monkey

- Your right hand turning into a girl

- Throwing a bottle of piss at singers you don't like

Avatar image for notdavid
#34 Posted by notdavid (873 posts) -

Is "WUB WUB WUB" already a card? Because I just now took care of that.

Avatar image for redhorn
#35 Posted by Redhorn (263 posts) -

Too bad that I can't get credited for all of my unspeakably genius submissions. ;_;

Avatar image for soralapio
#36 Posted by soralapio (285 posts) -

When you submit stuff, does the page just reset for anyone else? Am I supposed to get some kind of "way to go, you submitted stuff" page or is it working as intended?

Avatar image for m2cks
#37 Posted by m2cks (633 posts) -

I contributed with "beating 100%" and "Jurassic Park dubstep". I'll have to listen to more bombcasts to get more ideas, haha.

Avatar image for pudge
#38 Posted by Pudge (1169 posts) -

NOTHING STOPS THE GAME ROOM QUICK LOOK. Well, nothing except for _________

Avatar image for pudge
#39 Posted by Pudge (1169 posts) -

@soralapio said:

When you submit stuff, does the page just reset for anyone else? Am I supposed to get some kind of "way to go, you submitted stuff" page or is it working as intended?

That's what happens for me too, seems to be as designed.

Avatar image for bkbroiler
#40 Posted by bkbroiler (1731 posts) -

I can't wait to watch the video content of the GB / Cards guys debating and choosing the submissions.

Avatar image for theoriginalatlas
#41 Edited by Atlas (2575 posts) -

Black card ideas:

  • "It sucks when you look in the fridge, and all you have to eat is..."
  • "Instead of organised religion, I live my life according to the teachings of..."
  • "You can take the ____ out of _____, but you can't take the (second blank) out of (first blank)."
  • "I almost dropped out of college to pursue a career in..."
  • "I can't help but think about ____ while having a conversation with ______"
  • "The first time I saw two men making out, my first instinct was to..."

White card ideas:

  • Giving over to the dark side.
  • An unnecessary hemorrhage.
  • Forgetting to bring your phone to the bathroom when you poop.
  • Defying the laws of physics.
  • George Brett's pine tar bat.
  • The swollen breasts of a woman pregnant with quintuplets.
  • A white man trying to dance.
  • Sleep apnea.
  • Trying to find a good pizza place at 3am.
  • The Rape of Nanjing
  • A vagina with teeth.
  • Mastication.
  • Female circumcision.
  • Flipping off a bus full of disabled children because it cut you off.
  • The euthanasia debate.
  • Beating an autistic child at his own game.
  • MC Hammer
  • Realising that you're outnumbered by people of the opposite race.
  • The Jewish Diaspora.
  • A woman's gay friend.

EDIT: Didn't read the whole post, if I had I'd know that this isn't the place to submit ideas. But here's what I came up with, if you think there are any winners in there let me know and I'll submit the best ones.

Avatar image for brandino
#42 Posted by brandino (273 posts) -

I still need to buy Cards Against Humanity. It's always out of stock /sadface

Avatar image for nerolus
#43 Edited by Nerolus (278 posts) -

@Deadmanforking:

No Caption Provided

Ryan and I at Pax 2012. Sporting my Cards Against Humanity contest shirt.

Avatar image for winternet
#44 Posted by Winternet (8399 posts) -

I want to apologize in advance for the numerous card ideas regarding the ER:P4 I will no doubt send in the near future.

Avatar image for twogunsablazin
#45 Posted by TwoGunsABlazin (63 posts) -

Here's hoping the community can come up with something better than what Ryan had on last weeks Bombcast!

Avatar image for animasta
#46 Posted by Animasta (14903 posts) -

@subrandom said:

______ for me is a religion and _____ is the shit.

works better as a black card really

Avatar image for mrklorox
#47 Posted by MrKlorox (11142 posts) -

Do I post multiple in one submission? Or do I make a submission for every single idea?

Avatar image for iamjohn
#48 Edited by iAmJohn (6239 posts) -

"Why is that deer wearing a wrestling mask?" would be a pretty funny black card, FYI.

Avatar image for wjist
#49 Posted by WJist (330 posts) -

I love everything about this stupid goddamn website and what stupidity it makes possible. CAH IDEAS SUBMITTED

Avatar image for mrasmus
#50 Posted by mrasmus (38 posts) -

I did the necessary submissions of "Face and Neck Stabbings", "Mysterious Fox", "Peter Molyneux", "Peter Molyneux's Balls", and "Unconditional Love". Low-hanging fruit, mostly, but they needed to at least be on the list.