Recently through my job I have thankfully been in the position to help some folks who were dealing with some extreme psychiatric issues. In my country, Ireland, we have a terrible track record of dealing with this kind of thing, especially when it involves young adult males.
I am privileged to live in a country where this kind of contact sets off a procedure of concern and intervention.
We all have dark moments in our lives. For some people though, these dark moments stretch out and seem completely insurmountable.
You are not alone.
Please call someone. Talk to a family member, or a friend. If you do not feel comfortable calling emergency services, please talk to at least one person before you follow through. I do not know how hard things are for you right now, but someone close to you will understand.
If you feel like there is no one close to you who can understand, call emergency services and ask for an ambulance. The person who picks up is trained in recognizing your fear and WILL help you. Please do not be afraid to reach out for help.
From my experience and through the experience of the staff I work with, talking to someone helps, be it a family member, or a friend, or just a stranger on the end of a phone line.
Please talk to someone first. You are never alone. If i had truly known that in the past, my own incidents of self harm and attempts at suicide would have been avoided. I thought I was completely alone. I was completely wrong.
I am here for you, this community is here for you, you are not alone!
EDIT - if y'all have something going on that you are worried about and want to talk about, feel free to message me. I am not a mental health professional, but through the course of my work I have a lot of experience just talking with people. Please do that. I 100 percent do not mind, and there is no shame in it. I cannot guarantee I will get back to you straight away, but I will listen to you and chat with you about your problems. I may have been there, and if not, I have a 26 member strong workforce behind me of police and civilian staff who will gladly chime in on the kind of help you can receive and where you can get it. The road may be long, but there are folks who can help you with your burden. :)