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Bruce's Album Reviews: Far by Regina Spektor

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Bruce

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Edited By Bruce

(If you disagree, that's fine. I have spoke to some people, albeit only a few, who have enjoyed the album)

I do not know who made this record, but it certainly was not the Regina Spektor who made
I do not know who made this record, but it certainly was not the Regina Spektor who made "Baobabs" and Soviet Kitsch.

The charm, or, the only reason to listen to Regina Spektor’s music, has always been her way of conveying youthful ignorance. Most of her early work, and her past album “Begin to Hope” covered mature topics such as coming of age, and conformity in life through repetition, combined with cynical and for the most part, witty observations (and a hell of literary allusions) about anything that seemed to sound good when put behind a few piano chords; and hell, even her voice sounds like that of someone who doesn’t understand the very things she sings about.
 
Regina Spektor’s musicianship has always been basic, but that’s not what her fans look at; songwriting was always the focus. One of the bonus tracks on “Begin to Hope”, “Baobabs” covers children in the horrifying city, growing up solely to be the same as everyone else.Spektor was only twenty-six when she recorded “Begin to Hope”, and while her theme of a Holden-esque youth-cynic fighting the phonies of conformity was still interesting then, it just sounds asinine when now coming from a woman who is nearly in her thirties. This is made worse by most of Far changing from an opinionated, youthful cynic, to an old woman trying her best to sound young. And where old Regina was about fifteen or sixteen, Far has lowered itself to a level of maturity akin to a twelve year-old.


The first track on the record is, “The Calculation” Here, Spektor rehashes her usual stuff, “We sat there looking at the faces, of these strangers in the pages, ‘til we knew ‘em mathematically.” It’s not terrible, but we’ve heard this from her before, and we’ve heard it much better. The song continues with its generic sentiment for a few more lyrics before hitting the masterful “So we made our own computer out of macaroni pieces; and it did our thinking while we lived our lives.” I wonder if she giggled as she scribbled that onto the paper. Again, the song isn’t awful, but saying that something is just above being awful is really no better. “Eet” begins nicely, “It’s like forgetting the words to your favorite song. You can’t believe it; you were always singing along. It was so easy and the words so sweet. You can’t remember, you try to feel the beat.” Regina ruins this one by having a chorus that consists of “Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet.” In case you're wondering, it sounds exactly as it looks. As if she’s trying to give the song validity beyond the initial verse, Spektor sings, “Someone’s deciding whether or not to steal. He opens the window, just to feel the chill. He hears that outside, a small boy just starting to cry. ‘Cause it’s his turn, but his brother won’t let him try.” Even when this boy’s story makes me forget that abomination of a chorus, Spektor has to remind me by enunciating “B-Teh, B-Teh, B-Teh” for the last few seconds.    


“Blue Lips”
is not worth more than a few words. I’ll let you decide for yourself by looking at its corny chorus: “Blue lips, blue veins, Blue, the color of the planet from far, far away.” Repeat that about three times, then comes, “Blue, the most human color. Blue, the most human color. Blue, the most human color.” The album continues with “Folding Chair”. This song was good until Regina decided that making dolphin noises (I shit you not) was how she wanted to destroy this one. At least she prepares you for it with the lyric, “I get scared, and I’m sitting here alone, dreaming of the dolphin song.” Continuing the album (at this point, I became very bored and started playing Diablo 2 as I listened) is “Machine”, which sounds as if Regina listened to “Fiction (Dreams in Digital)” by Orgy and then decided to write a spiritual-successor. Again, I only need to quote the chorus: “Hooking into machine. Hooked into machine. Hooked into machine. I’m hooked into, I’m hooked into. Hooked into machine. Hooked into machine. Hooked into machine. I’m hooked into. Hooked into machine.” Worse than this, is the ending lyric of, “And you lived in the future. And the future, it’s here, it’s bright, it’s now.” Honestly, I was ready to give up on Far after that song, but then came “Laughing With (God)”. After listening to this about four times in a row, I put my hands together, sending a prayer of thanks of my own for there being at least one song on this record showing the Regina Spektor of old. Regina’s idea that God “Can be funny”, and that our downs in life are simply the jokes he plays, which we don’t laugh at, well, it’s brilliant. Her childish voice returns, instead of the mature sounding vocal style she seemed to have picked for the previous songs. Spektor terrifically sings, “God can be funny, when he told you he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way; God can be so hilarious.” The song is classic Regina Spektor, and it ends wonderfully with, “No one’s laughing at God. We’re all laughing with God.”


The album continues with “Human of the Year”, where Regina tries very hard to show off her mature vocal ability as apposed to the child-like squeal we’ve come to expect from her. It’s not horrible, but as I said before, that’s not really a compliment. The song is just generic, even when it tries to turn into a female-folk version of Jeff Buckley’s “Hallelujah” toward the end. “Two Birds (On a wire)” is remotely clever, but falls on its face when it tries to introduce a little tuba section. (At least that’s what it sounds like.) “Dance Anthem of the 80’s” is a song that actually made me stop listening to the album for a bit, as I had to get a drink of water and listen to something else for about a half an hour. Sort of like how “Machine” seems to have taken its inspiration from an Orgy track, “Dance Anthem of the 80’s” can be looked at as Regina Spektor trying to do her best 3 6 Mafia “Stay Fly” impression during the intro. The song gets a bit better, introducing some cute vocal layers and a nice horn section, but “Eet” already covered the subject of “Moving to that beat, that beat.” Don’t worry folks, there aren’t many songs left on this one. Continuing on with this struggle is, “Genius Next Door”. Again, it isn’t bad, just boring. I really like some of Regina’s lyrics on this one, such as, “Atheists were praying full of sarcasm, and the genius was door was sleeping, dreaming that the antidote was orgasm.” Moving from one OK song to an absolute piece of shit, Far continues with “Wallet”. Just to give an idea of how stupid this one is, here are the lyrics in their entirety:


I found a wallet. I found a wallet. Inside were pictures of your small family. You were so young; your hair dark brown, you had been born in nineteen fifty-three. Your winter birthday was stamped on the plastic of a license so recently expired. I was so tired, as I walked through my door, I let all the contents of your wallet on the floor. And like a holy relic, or a mystery novel, I thumbed them in the dim light, searching for a clue: A blockbuster card; An old stick of juicy fruit; A crumpled receipt, for a pair of leather boots. I have no wallet. I have no wallet. I keep my cards together with a blue rubber band, and with a free hand, I search in my pockets, for pieces of, pieces of paper and change. I’ll take your wallet to my local blockbuster; they’ll find your number in their computer. You’ll never know me. I’ll never know you, but you’ll be so happy when they call you up.” (I know it's satire, but it's not good)


Despite Far having two more songs on it, (Neither which save the album.)I think it’s a good idea to sum it all up: Far is a bad album. Hell, I’d even go as far as saying that it’s one of the worst albums that I have listened to all year. It’s definitely a huge disappointment as I am a rather large fan of Regina Spektor. “Laughing With” is great, but nothing else on Far is. From what I’ve read from other listeners and user reviews of the album, most people are pissed at her change in sound (WE DO NOT WANT MATURE SOUNDING VOCALS FROM REGINA SPEKTOR) and direction. As much as I want the ignorant, witty, super-cynic Regina Spektor of old to return, it seems like it just isn’t possible given how many albums she has put out, and how old she is. If Far is any indication, “Laughing With” could be the last time we’ll hear the Regina Spektor that we’re used to.

Bruce's Final Grade: I don't want to give this a score, as I did not enjoy most of the album, but some people might disagree and enjoy more of the album than I did. If you're a fan of Regina, you might be able to look past some of the bullshit (I doubt it) but, if you're looking for an introduction to Regina Spektor, this is not the place to get it.

What to download: Laughing With


  
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Bruce

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#1  Edited By Bruce

(If you disagree, that's fine. I have spoke to some people, albeit only a few, who have enjoyed the album)

I do not know who made this record, but it certainly was not the Regina Spektor who made
I do not know who made this record, but it certainly was not the Regina Spektor who made "Baobabs" and Soviet Kitsch.

The charm, or, the only reason to listen to Regina Spektor’s music, has always been her way of conveying youthful ignorance. Most of her early work, and her past album “Begin to Hope” covered mature topics such as coming of age, and conformity in life through repetition, combined with cynical and for the most part, witty observations (and a hell of literary allusions) about anything that seemed to sound good when put behind a few piano chords; and hell, even her voice sounds like that of someone who doesn’t understand the very things she sings about.
 
Regina Spektor’s musicianship has always been basic, but that’s not what her fans look at; songwriting was always the focus. One of the bonus tracks on “Begin to Hope”, “Baobabs” covers children in the horrifying city, growing up solely to be the same as everyone else.Spektor was only twenty-six when she recorded “Begin to Hope”, and while her theme of a Holden-esque youth-cynic fighting the phonies of conformity was still interesting then, it just sounds asinine when now coming from a woman who is nearly in her thirties. This is made worse by most of Far changing from an opinionated, youthful cynic, to an old woman trying her best to sound young. And where old Regina was about fifteen or sixteen, Far has lowered itself to a level of maturity akin to a twelve year-old.


The first track on the record is, “The Calculation” Here, Spektor rehashes her usual stuff, “We sat there looking at the faces, of these strangers in the pages, ‘til we knew ‘em mathematically.” It’s not terrible, but we’ve heard this from her before, and we’ve heard it much better. The song continues with its generic sentiment for a few more lyrics before hitting the masterful “So we made our own computer out of macaroni pieces; and it did our thinking while we lived our lives.” I wonder if she giggled as she scribbled that onto the paper. Again, the song isn’t awful, but saying that something is just above being awful is really no better. “Eet” begins nicely, “It’s like forgetting the words to your favorite song. You can’t believe it; you were always singing along. It was so easy and the words so sweet. You can’t remember, you try to feel the beat.” Regina ruins this one by having a chorus that consists of “Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet, Eet.” In case you're wondering, it sounds exactly as it looks. As if she’s trying to give the song validity beyond the initial verse, Spektor sings, “Someone’s deciding whether or not to steal. He opens the window, just to feel the chill. He hears that outside, a small boy just starting to cry. ‘Cause it’s his turn, but his brother won’t let him try.” Even when this boy’s story makes me forget that abomination of a chorus, Spektor has to remind me by enunciating “B-Teh, B-Teh, B-Teh” for the last few seconds.    


“Blue Lips”
is not worth more than a few words. I’ll let you decide for yourself by looking at its corny chorus: “Blue lips, blue veins, Blue, the color of the planet from far, far away.” Repeat that about three times, then comes, “Blue, the most human color. Blue, the most human color. Blue, the most human color.” The album continues with “Folding Chair”. This song was good until Regina decided that making dolphin noises (I shit you not) was how she wanted to destroy this one. At least she prepares you for it with the lyric, “I get scared, and I’m sitting here alone, dreaming of the dolphin song.” Continuing the album (at this point, I became very bored and started playing Diablo 2 as I listened) is “Machine”, which sounds as if Regina listened to “Fiction (Dreams in Digital)” by Orgy and then decided to write a spiritual-successor. Again, I only need to quote the chorus: “Hooking into machine. Hooked into machine. Hooked into machine. I’m hooked into, I’m hooked into. Hooked into machine. Hooked into machine. Hooked into machine. I’m hooked into. Hooked into machine.” Worse than this, is the ending lyric of, “And you lived in the future. And the future, it’s here, it’s bright, it’s now.” Honestly, I was ready to give up on Far after that song, but then came “Laughing With (God)”. After listening to this about four times in a row, I put my hands together, sending a prayer of thanks of my own for there being at least one song on this record showing the Regina Spektor of old. Regina’s idea that God “Can be funny”, and that our downs in life are simply the jokes he plays, which we don’t laugh at, well, it’s brilliant. Her childish voice returns, instead of the mature sounding vocal style she seemed to have picked for the previous songs. Spektor terrifically sings, “God can be funny, when he told you he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way; God can be so hilarious.” The song is classic Regina Spektor, and it ends wonderfully with, “No one’s laughing at God. We’re all laughing with God.”


The album continues with “Human of the Year”, where Regina tries very hard to show off her mature vocal ability as apposed to the child-like squeal we’ve come to expect from her. It’s not horrible, but as I said before, that’s not really a compliment. The song is just generic, even when it tries to turn into a female-folk version of Jeff Buckley’s “Hallelujah” toward the end. “Two Birds (On a wire)” is remotely clever, but falls on its face when it tries to introduce a little tuba section. (At least that’s what it sounds like.) “Dance Anthem of the 80’s” is a song that actually made me stop listening to the album for a bit, as I had to get a drink of water and listen to something else for about a half an hour. Sort of like how “Machine” seems to have taken its inspiration from an Orgy track, “Dance Anthem of the 80’s” can be looked at as Regina Spektor trying to do her best 3 6 Mafia “Stay Fly” impression during the intro. The song gets a bit better, introducing some cute vocal layers and a nice horn section, but “Eet” already covered the subject of “Moving to that beat, that beat.” Don’t worry folks, there aren’t many songs left on this one. Continuing on with this struggle is, “Genius Next Door”. Again, it isn’t bad, just boring. I really like some of Regina’s lyrics on this one, such as, “Atheists were praying full of sarcasm, and the genius was door was sleeping, dreaming that the antidote was orgasm.” Moving from one OK song to an absolute piece of shit, Far continues with “Wallet”. Just to give an idea of how stupid this one is, here are the lyrics in their entirety:


I found a wallet. I found a wallet. Inside were pictures of your small family. You were so young; your hair dark brown, you had been born in nineteen fifty-three. Your winter birthday was stamped on the plastic of a license so recently expired. I was so tired, as I walked through my door, I let all the contents of your wallet on the floor. And like a holy relic, or a mystery novel, I thumbed them in the dim light, searching for a clue: A blockbuster card; An old stick of juicy fruit; A crumpled receipt, for a pair of leather boots. I have no wallet. I have no wallet. I keep my cards together with a blue rubber band, and with a free hand, I search in my pockets, for pieces of, pieces of paper and change. I’ll take your wallet to my local blockbuster; they’ll find your number in their computer. You’ll never know me. I’ll never know you, but you’ll be so happy when they call you up.” (I know it's satire, but it's not good)


Despite Far having two more songs on it, (Neither which save the album.)I think it’s a good idea to sum it all up: Far is a bad album. Hell, I’d even go as far as saying that it’s one of the worst albums that I have listened to all year. It’s definitely a huge disappointment as I am a rather large fan of Regina Spektor. “Laughing With” is great, but nothing else on Far is. From what I’ve read from other listeners and user reviews of the album, most people are pissed at her change in sound (WE DO NOT WANT MATURE SOUNDING VOCALS FROM REGINA SPEKTOR) and direction. As much as I want the ignorant, witty, super-cynic Regina Spektor of old to return, it seems like it just isn’t possible given how many albums she has put out, and how old she is. If Far is any indication, “Laughing With” could be the last time we’ll hear the Regina Spektor that we’re used to.

Bruce's Final Grade: I don't want to give this a score, as I did not enjoy most of the album, but some people might disagree and enjoy more of the album than I did. If you're a fan of Regina, you might be able to look past some of the bullshit (I doubt it) but, if you're looking for an introduction to Regina Spektor, this is not the place to get it.

What to download: Laughing With


  
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Keyser_Soze

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#2  Edited By Keyser_Soze

I ain't reading that.

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Bruce

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#3  Edited By Bruce
@Keyser_Soze:

Then don't.
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Keyser_Soze

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#4  Edited By Keyser_Soze
@Bruce said:
" @Keyser_Soze: Then don't. "
OK, I won't.
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#5  Edited By Jayge_

Is this the CD where she has the song about nobody laughing at god?


For some reason, I found it offensive.

Like she was lecturing me about being a weak person who will turn to religion when things get bad, like everyone has to believe in god.

I am not a fan of Regina Spektor.
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Bruce

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#6  Edited By Bruce
@Jayge:

I suggest looking at the lyrics more carefully.
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Jayge_

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#7  Edited By Jayge_
@Bruce: Nah. The music itself doesn't warrant going back and finding out that I wasn't paying attention close enough in the first place anyway.
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Keyser_Soze

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#8  Edited By Keyser_Soze
@Jayge said:
" @Bruce: Nah. The music itself doesn't warrant going back and finding out that I wasn't paying attention close enough in the first place anyway. "
BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Bruce

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#9  Edited By Bruce
@Jayge:

That's actually how I felt about most of the album. BUT, back to your point, if you consider it shitty, I wouldn't let it offend you.
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phlegms

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#10  Edited By phlegms

She's hawt!
Makes pretty music too I guess.

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#11  Edited By Jayge_
@Bruce said:
" @Jayge: That's actually how I felt about most of the album. BUT, back to your point, if you consider it shitty, I wouldn't let it offend you. "
Advice taken.
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Bruce

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#12  Edited By Bruce
@phlegms:

SHE IS NOT HOT AND THIS ALBUM IS NOT GOOD! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I do like Laughing With though.
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#13  Edited By c1337us
@Keyser_Soze said:
" I ain't reading that. "
I am not listening to it either.

Seriously Bruce. Dude that is a pretty good look at the album you did there and I did screen through it a little bit. But this isnt the kind of tunes I usually listen to so I doubt I'll listen to the entire album, that Laughing with you posted with it was enough for me.
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Bruce

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#14  Edited By Bruce
@c1337us:

Laughing With is the only song I recommend people listen to from this piece of shit, so I don't blame you.
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#15  Edited By phlegms
@Bruce:  I suppose she would need a mustache and a tank top for her to appeal to you. 

See what I did there, I implied Homosexuality over the internet. Zing!
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Bruce

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#16  Edited By Bruce
@phlegms:

I've never been a fan of Jewish girls visually, maybe because I went to school with them for nearly 8 years. Now Alice Glass of Crystal Castles, that's a pretty girl.
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#17  Edited By phlegms
@Bruce:  I didn't know that Jewish girls had a particularly distinctive "look". And yes that chic from CC is hawt, but a weird freaky hot. Almost like I know she is  good looking but I'm not quite sure why..
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#18  Edited By BlastProcessing

I'll pass. I'm better off listening to my mom's Alanis Morrisette albums.

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#19  Edited By Ineedaname
@BlastProcessing said:
" I'll pass. I'm better off listening to my mom's Alanis Morrisette albums. "
Yeah, your Mum's sure they are ¬¬.........

However, tl:dr, but I did listen to that song, it wasn't bad, it wasn't anything I'd listen to alot, have you ever listened to Bitter:Sweet?
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Keyser_Soze

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#20  Edited By Keyser_Soze
@phlegms said:
" @Bruce:  I didn't know that Jewish girls had a particularly distinctive "look".
Bruce you anti-semite, if you don't apologise I'mma gonna contact AIPAC and the Anti-Defamation League to sue your unrighteous ass.
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Bruce

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#21  Edited By Bruce
@phlegms:

I totally could have went to prom with a girl who looked just like her too....if ONLY I ASKED!
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#22  Edited By phlegms
@Bruce: Whats all this about "prom" and "asking"? Over here we usually just force ourselves on the most unassuming female and have at it, jewish or not jewish.
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Bruce

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#23  Edited By Bruce
@phlegms:

'Tis the Irish way.
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#24  Edited By JamesF

Please stop with the music in which girls are singers. I can't stand it.