I've failed about as drastically as I could imagine.
I'm 28. I still rely on my single parent far too much. I had a menial job for the majority of my 20s which is effectively the same as not working. I had to give up my apartment when I lost that job and now I'm living from home again. I was a top student near the beginning of school, but now I'm struggling. My girlfriend is constantly miserable and I appear to be incapable of doing anything about it, though she's probably miserable because I don't want to do 'fun' things and spend time with obnoxious people. So that's also my fault. I've taken out more than I've put in to the world and nothing other than decades of work and effort is ever going to justify my existence. I want the absolute minimum baseline treatment that adults treat other adults with, but since I am not capable of supporting myself, I'm not an adult and don't deserve to be treated like one.
To the 'who cares what others think' crowd. If you woke up tomorrow and the sun was blue, but everyone else said it was yellow, would you take your opinion as real or everyone else's? The 'it's okay to not meet the standard' is not how people actually feel, it's just what they say to failures to make them feel better. And then they continue to judge the world the same way they understand everyone else does.
would be excessive but if I could @EVERYONE I would, don't give anyone the power to tell you that you are not or can not be successful, who are these superior humans that we elevate above ourselves to not only allow them to judge our worth but take it as fact. I see so many people in here saying they have been told by friends/family they are "a failure" or "disappointment". I don't even personally know any of you and I can say that is a load of BS. No one on this earth should have the ability to rank your worth, don't tell me that a large group of perceptive people that have the insight to contemplate this question aren't successful, do you realize how many people drift through life without ever even considering this type of question? Don't let those same people demoralize you and demean you, pick yourself up and build your own happiness and success. You will go further in life while these negative influences move on to the next person to cast evil and hate on in an attempt to bring down. Misery and unhappiness love company and fear success. I don't see any one here that should feel they have to sink to that level.
Nearly killed in a car accident when I was six (it took my father). Got a really bad head injury from said accident. Was able to finish graduate school second in my group. That alone makes me feel both successful and lucky. I also have a wicked good savings account
I own a semi-successful business, a semi-nice home with semi-nice things in it, have a semi-loving wife, and a semi-large group of close friends. I'm also a man in his thirties that enjoys making and reading dick and fart jokes on a video game website.
Success is no where near as important as happiness.
I want to start making some money but it's very hard when I'm still in grad school and have a broke girlfriend. I procrastinate way too much which makes me worried about my ability to do well in the future. From a superficial view of my life I'm doing very well for myself, but I'm pretty sure I have some sort of mental disease that makes it hard for me to concentrate on work or be truly happy. I should probably go see a doctor about it.
I could be doing better, so while I don't really consider myself successful, I'm still really content. To me, a successful person is someone that can rely on themselves to make a living, or to support a family, while for me, I have a job, and it pays well, but it's nowhere near enough to live on my own; I'd probably have to get a second job, and/or a girlfriend with a job for that. Success is a personal thing though really. I'm pretty happy, so that's all that really matters to me right now.
Success is relative to your starting point, relative to your goals, and finally relative to what type of sucess you are measuring - spouse, parent, friend, job, lifestyle, or general well being.
I say it is impossible to be a sucess at everything, its a pick a few and be happy to keep those balls in the air. You might be a successful husband, a good friend, and successful at accountant; yet still be a less successful father, be terrible at keeping your heath up, and waste your money making your lifestyle suffer.
It is also possible to start off with all the breaks and an easy road to sucess and screw it up so badly as to make your life LESS of a sucess than its could have been. ...
I think I am a sucess at my job, but I am not very successful in my relationships with others. I am taking my health under control and have good health now, but I have no kids so 'a basic bit' of being alive has escaped me. My lifestyle is good...safe, happy, and I earn a lot. I have far outpaced what others thought I could achieve; but, to be honest I could probably do more creatively.
That's basically how I feel most of the time. I've pretty much disappointed my family. I think out of all my brothers (Even my deceased one). I'm the one that turned my life into the worst.
Same here.
But at the same time, I do notice that I'm one of the few around me that is actually striving to do something I feel passionate about. Most others are just 'looking for work'. I put that in quotes, because they are just doing work to do work that earns them money. You know, the people that constantly complain about the work they have to do, feel stressed out and are tired of life? That seems to be my family. Sometimes I think they are the failures and the only thing I fail in is meeting expectations of others. Which is still shitty, but at least I can enjoy my life.
That's basically how I feel most of the time. I've pretty much disappointed my family. I think out of all my brothers (Even my deceased one). I'm the one that turned my life into the worst.
Same here.
But at the same time, I do notice that I'm one of the few around me that is actually striving to do something I feel passionate about. Most others are just 'looking for work'. I put that in quotes, because they are just doing work to do work that earns them money. You know, the people that constantly complain about the work they have to do, feel stressed out and are tired of life? That seems to be my family. Sometimes I think they are the failures and the only thing I fail in is meeting expectations of others. Which is still shitty, but at least I can enjoy my life.
Living life where your unhappy does suck, and not doing anything about it makes it worse. We all thrive to want to become something more then what we are, but trying to go about doing things can be difficult. All of us have to face are own exclusive challenges and problems during are lives. Sometimes we accomplish things, but then more problems will occur afterwards, its all apart of life and we all come to learn from what we experience.
Well, the first thing that popped into my mind while thinking about the question was Scarlett Johansson's breasts touching my face in slow-motion to the theme of 2001: A Space Odyssey. That hasn't happened yet, so I'm gonna go with, "No."
Successful...no not there yet. I'm 23 now and sometimes I do feel pretty sad/guilty/stupid that I've wasted 4 years of my life getting a degree that is barely helping me find any kind of work. But then I realize that I wouldn't have my gf or any of the friends I have now. I've essentially switched career plans so it's like starting over but only this time with a growing mountain of debt.
I'm stressed the fuck out, but I think I'll get to "successful" when I can live comfortably in my own place doing something I enjoy. And when I can finally afford to buy all the games on my "Shit I have to play" list.
Well, the first thing that popped into my mind while thinking about the question was Scarlett Johansson's breasts touching my face in slow-motion to the theme of 2001: A Space Odyssey. That hasn't happened yet, so I'm gonna go with, "No."
My only metric of success is how happy I feel, and I don't feel too happy these days. Feel like I'm droning on, no real passion. I'd say I'm a 2 stars out of 5 then.
I'm on the path to being successful. Going to be graduating in June with a degree in Economics from a good school. I'm hoping that well put in a position to get a good job and start paying back my loans.
Going through school was not without its challenges. I spent 3 years in Junior College. Transferred intending to do Computer Science, then promptly got my ass kicked by school, and stumbled through my first year at University. Had to make it up in summer by borrow money from my folks, then barely was allowed to come back. Spent a quarter there, then got kicked out. Did summer session again, switched majors to Econ, and now I'm going to graduate.
I did it the hard and stupid way, but I'm glad I toughed it out I guess. Still thinking about going to a state school and pursuing Computer Science though.
I'm happy about a lot of things in my life, but I wouldn't say I've achieved any kind of 'success'. I mean, that kind of sounds like some end game shit. I'm still working, learning, discovering, and I feel like I've still got quite a lot of that ahead of me.
This thread's kind of a sign of the times. Shit's tough, and the average age of self-sustainability has skyrocketed. Of course that doesn't mean you should accept that as an excuse. It's good to be keenly aware of your shortcomings/failings so you can learn from them, but also remember to not get lost in the negative. Enjoying life while up to your neck in crushing tasks is as good of a skill as any.
No one on this earth should have the ability to rank your worth
Not even yourself?
Yes, not even yourself. That may sound strange, but the recurring pattern we are seeing in this thread is that many people here have had there personal view of success skewed by negative influences around them. Whether it is people or temporary circumstances, these outcomes have allowed people to come to inaccurate conclusions of their own selfworth/success. I am saying that these determinations are not true, of course you are going to have a negative opinion of yourself when it is fueled by "friends" and family who for reasons I can't understand take some sadistic pleasure in demeaning those they should support the most. It's sad but this isn't uncommon, I am saying that self worth assessments coming from these circumstances are not going to be accurate.
@video_game_king: I'll need you to elaborate on what kind of answer you want from me, if we aren't having a conversation within the context of this thread then I am not sure where you are coming from.
I would say I'm a constant work in progress. I have succeeded in the goals I've set for myself. Right now I'm at a point where I'm going to make all new goals towards the next part of my life. I dropped out from college because I didn't like it or know what I really wanted and worked a shit job I hated. I went to a tech school years later and got a job in the field I was aiming to work in. I kind of diverged in what exactly I wanted to do but it's been interesting and I like it. I don't regret the past because it helped drive me to do better things.
@video_game_king: I'll need you to elaborate on what kind of answer you want from me
I'm not entirely sure myself. It just seems like.....I don't even know how to put it. You're placing self worth in the context of others, and I'm trying to see what happens if we move away from that? Or something? Not entirely sure.
Jobless college student living off mother's money! Oh, and I failed one of my required courses last semester! (Calculus. Shoot me.)
That said, I will finally be moving into a house off campus next semester, will be having to take care of rent by way of working as much as I can, while also doing well in school. If I can manage to take care of rent and get good grades, I will consider myself a success for where I'm at right now. And that's what I'm focusing on.
I probably think about this more than is healthy for a person's well-being. A few years ago I would have said absolutely not. Unemployed, severely depressed and alienating my friends and family.
A couple months ago though I finished my Masters degree and completed an internship that I loved and really found rewarding. I'm looking for a job right now since my internship ended and that is definitely a source of frustration. I don't know if I would say i'm success yet but i have definitely improved my life.
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