• 79 results
  • 1
  • 2

This topic is locked from further discussion.

Avatar image for living_monstrosity
#1 Posted by Living_Monstrosity (76 posts) -

I've dated all kinds of girls, meaning different ethnicities as well as different styles (i.e. preppy, tomboy). But I have yet to get with a goth chick. There's this one club I go to that has a lot of those girls with the colored hair, nose rings, black makeup etc, but what usually works with other girls doesn't seem to work on these chicks - this one girl told me to f*** myself and called me a conformist when I merely asked her name.

Any of you hook up with a goth? Did you have to pretend to be a wizard or worship Satan to get their attention?

Avatar image for humanoid
#2 Posted by Humanoid (218 posts) -

With your back, the majority of them seem quite large.

She called you a conformist? I've dated a goth, I thought she was the Queen of goths, but she never called me a conformist. That sounds like the stereotypical goth they show on South Park.

Avatar image for sweep
#3 Posted by Sweep (10175 posts) -

Fake your own death.

I'm not even kidding.

Moderator
Avatar image for zacagawea
#4 Posted by Zacagawea (1678 posts) -
No Caption Provided
Avatar image for animasta
#5 Posted by Animasta (14903 posts) -

Sure she wasn't joking? if not than I don't think she's interested in a relationship with you, but feel free to try and stock up on hot topic gear and try again

Avatar image for hitchenson
#6 Posted by Hitchenson (4708 posts) -

Cut yourself, failing that, cut on her a bit.

Avatar image for shookems
#7 Posted by Shookems (479 posts) -
Loading Video...
Avatar image for thesoutherndandy
#8 Posted by TheSouthernDandy (4107 posts) -

This is my favorite thread of the day.

Goth girls can be hot. I guess you just have to find out how to tell the cool ones from the belligerent ones.

Avatar image for slowbird
#9 Posted by slowbird (1907 posts) -

I would prefer a raver chick.

Avatar image for sockemjetpack
#10 Posted by SockemJetpack (432 posts) -

So dye your hair black if it isn't already, pierce your face, get all sad and wear black and white striped shirts with leather pants. The only way to not be a conformist is to conform to the nonconformists.

Avatar image for shookems
#11 Edited by Shookems (479 posts) -

Whisper lyrics to evanescence songs into their ears, offer them dead roses, wear Jack Skellington t-shirts, get a fake nose ring, etc

Avatar image for drag
#12 Posted by drag (1212 posts) -

go fuck yourself seems like pretty decent advice to me

Avatar image for rockyraccoon37
#13 Posted by RockyRaccoon37 (527 posts) -

@drag said:

go fuck yourself seems like pretty decent advice to me

Spot on!

Avatar image for ares42
#14 Posted by Ares42 (3561 posts) -

It's all about appearance.

Avatar image for marz
#15 Posted by Marz (6019 posts) -

don't waste your time is all the advice i can give.

Avatar image for wrighteous86
#16 Posted by Wrighteous86 (3927 posts) -

Show her the scars on your arms. Make sure you cut the right way. Bitches love suicide scars.

Avatar image for theveteran13
#17 Edited by TheVeteran13 (1411 posts) -

Cut yourself and they'll sniff you out eventually, also buy some Ur by Usher and spritz that shit all over so you smell real sad.

What I'm trying to say here is that goth chicks are like sharks except the pointy teeth are in their vaginas

Avatar image for negativecero
#18 Posted by NegativeCero (3141 posts) -

My first reaction to seeing this thread title was laughter, followed by "God damn it," as I saw this wasn't a joke

Avatar image for benson
#19 Posted by benson (316 posts) -

Flail your arms around and shriek like you're a bat. Works everytime.

Avatar image for stonyman65
#20 Posted by Stonyman65 (3615 posts) -

@Living_Monstrosity said:

I've dated all kinds of girls, meaning different ethnicities as well as different styles (i.e. preppy, tomboy). But I have yet to get with a goth chick. There's this one club I go to that has a lot of those girls with the colored hair, nose rings, black makeup etc, but what usually works with other girls doesn't seem to work on these chicks - this one girl told me to f*** myself and called me a conformist when I merely asked her name.

Any of you hook up with a goth? Did you have to pretend to be a wizard or worship Satan to get their attention?

Is she hot? Because she doesn't sound like it. Why don't you tell that anti-conformist bitch to suck it? That's what I'd do.

Avatar image for hot_karl
#21 Posted by Hot_Karl (3321 posts) -

If she called you a conformist, she's probably a fake lesbian.

Avatar image for freshbandito
#22 Edited by Freshbandito (705 posts) -

"Man I been wit all kindsa womens, my dick constantly be wet, and that's why I come to gaming sites for woman advice."

Honest advice? she doesn't like you, there's no magical fucking chat up line when someone doesn't like you.

I'm just so glad that ryan image was posted.

Avatar image for wjb
#23 Posted by wjb (1907 posts) -

Why...?

Avatar image for alistercat
#24 Posted by AlisterCat (7366 posts) -

With gloves?

Avatar image for n7
#25 Posted by N7 (4159 posts) -

Walk up behind her and start choking her. If she struggles, that means she likes you.

Avatar image for dvdhaus
#26 Posted by dvdhaus (373 posts) -

@Sweep said:

Fake your own death.

I'm not even kidding.

Fact! This man speaks the truth listen to him.

Avatar image for mikegosot
#27 Posted by MikeGosot (3237 posts) -

I don't have a fucking clue. And 2 of the 3 girlfriends i've ever had were goths.

Avatar image for benson
#28 Posted by benson (316 posts) -

Disembowel a goat in front of her in the name of Satan then lick your sacrificial knife suggestively

Avatar image for poppduder
#29 Posted by Poppduder (522 posts) -

I dont mean to sound wacky or anything, but try talking to her. Initiate conversation, listen intently while making eye contact. Ask her about her, dont say "wow thats really cool me too". Speak to her like a human. Then maybe tell her your last name and ask her to find you on facebook, or ask her for her number so you guys can catch a show or get sushi (bitches love sushi).

Avatar image for rattle618
#30 Posted by Rattle618 (1505 posts) -

If your only goal is to get a goth chick then just go for chunky/fugly ones and keep trying. It´s the same probability game as with any other group of women: the more you try the better your chances.

Avatar image for bruce
#31 Posted by Bruce (6238 posts) -

@Living_Monstrosity:

I dated a Colombian girl who was pretty goth. Dark make-up, into all that Wicca bullshit. Just walked up to her and asked her out. Preeeetty simple.

Avatar image for little_socrates
#32 Posted by Little_Socrates (5844 posts) -

If she told you to fuck off and called you a conformist she was probably wasn't looking to hook up. I was gonna post advice until I realized how horribly sexist and disgusting that would be.

As a straight nerdy white man, I'm telling you to fuck off.

Avatar image for joker369
#33 Posted by Joker369 (971 posts) -
@Zacagawea
No Caption Provided
Avatar image for living_monstrosity
#34 Posted by Living_Monstrosity (76 posts) -

I just want to get with a goth girl for one night cuz I heard they're freaky in bed and I want to see if it's true. But these kinds of girls are just so bitter and angry, which makes getting to first base difficult, let alone getting to home plate.

Goth chick: What kind of music do you like?

Me: Death metal and euro-dance. You?

Goth chick: WTF? Your music taste sucks ass!

Me: I doubt your music taste is any better.

Goth chick: Oh please, I bet you've never even heard of Moonspell you tool!

-_-

@dvdhaus said:

@Sweep said:

Fake your own death.

I'm not even kidding.

Fact! This man speaks the truth listen to him.

lolwut? Do you know this from experience? 0_0

Avatar image for thehumandove
#35 Posted by TheHumanDove (2520 posts) -

Talk about witchcraft and heavy metal. Also be sure to also fit into a stereotype as well, so you can relate, undermining actual identity and personality.

That should work

Avatar image for raviolisumo
#36 Posted by RavioliSumo (2188 posts) -

Those sound like scene girls to me. Did goth and scene become the same thing?

Avatar image for festeringneon
#37 Posted by FesteringNeon (2276 posts) -

I'm no pro, yet with having actually "been with" a goth chick.. these are my opinions:

No Caption Provided

Most can tell your intentions before you even open your mouth... that itself is your downfall. Most also may think the goth "object" is going to automatically be a freak, so the flash of their tough exterior shell, helps diffuse these types of situations. The fact is... they love bright colored cupcakes and flowers just like the next girl. But honestly, a cleaver gift (above) (coupled with http://www.etsy.com/listing/89884471/god-bless-sasha-grey-t-shir)and a tattoo sleeve will get you far, but doesn't mean she'll sleep with you, yet.

Avatar image for freshbandito
#38 Posted by Freshbandito (705 posts) -

@Living_Monstrosity said:

I just want to get with a goth girl for one night cuz I heard they're freaky in bed and I want to see if it's true. But these kinds of girls are just so bitter and angry, which makes getting to first base difficult, let alone getting to home plate.

pro-tip: women aren't bitter and angry if they turn you down (if it helps you feel better then run with it champ), it just means they don't like you and you're less of a man for it. Try faking your own death as others have suggested. Also 's choking advice is spot on.

Avatar image for seriouslynow
#39 Posted by SeriouslyNow (8504 posts) -
@TheHumanDove said:

Talk about witchcraft and heavy metal. Also be sure to also fit into a stereotype as well, so you can relate, undermining actual identity and personality.

That should work

That's not Goth.  Goth chicks aren't Wiccan and often hate the fuck out of Metal.  Is The Cure metal? I don't think so.
Avatar image for daveyo520
#40 Posted by Daveyo520 (7748 posts) -

Well, how much does she weigh? I guess that will dictate what kind of physical training you need to do to get ready to lift.

Avatar image for benson
#41 Posted by benson (316 posts) -

Pretend that you're the ghost of Ian Curtis then touch her shoulder!

Avatar image for thehumandove
#42 Posted by TheHumanDove (2520 posts) -

@SeriouslyNow said:

@TheHumanDove said:

Talk about witchcraft and heavy metal. Also be sure to also fit into a stereotype as well, so you can relate, undermining actual identity and personality.

That should work

That's not Goth. Goth chicks aren't Wiccan and often hate the fuck out of Metal. Is The Cure metal? I don't think so.

That's alright, since it was sarcasm to make fun of willing stereotypes. I'm not an expert on goth culture

Avatar image for living_monstrosity
#43 Posted by Living_Monstrosity (76 posts) -

@Freshbandito said:

@Living_Monstrosity said:

I just want to get with a goth girl for one night cuz I heard they're freaky in bed and I want to see if it's true. But these kinds of girls are just so bitter and angry, which makes getting to first base difficult, let alone getting to home plate.

pro-tip: women aren't bitter and angry if they turn you down (if it helps you feel better then run with it champ), it just means they don't like you and you're less of a man for it. Try faking your own death as others have suggested. Also 's choking advice is spot on.

I know that. These are the kinds of women that are totally bitter though. I can tell just by overhearing their convos. They all hate their parents and are always talking about how much the world sucks.

Avatar image for forkboy
#44 Posted by forkboy (1584 posts) -

@Living_Monstrosity said:

I just want to get with a goth girl for one night cuz I heard they're freaky in bed and I want to see if it's true. But these kinds of girls are just so bitter and angry, which makes getting to first base difficult, let alone getting to home plate.

Goth chick: What kind of music do you like?

Me: Death metal and euro-dance. You?

Goth chick: WTF? Your music taste sucks ass!

Me: I doubt your music taste is any better.

Goth chick: Oh please, I bet you've never even heard of Moonspell you tool!

-_-

This shit is cringeworthy. Goths are just people. Some of them are very nice, some of them are petty fucks. So for starters try not being an awful douchebag who only wants to say "hey I fucked a goth lol".

Avatar image for pyromagnestir
#45 Posted by pyromagnestir (4453 posts) -

Punch her in the face and if she gets pissed off call her a conformist to gender socio evolutionary something, fuck I don't know. Make something up.

Avatar image for forkboy
#46 Posted by forkboy (1584 posts) -

@Living_Monstrosity said:

@Freshbandito said:

@Living_Monstrosity said:

I just want to get with a goth girl for one night cuz I heard they're freaky in bed and I want to see if it's true. But these kinds of girls are just so bitter and angry, which makes getting to first base difficult, let alone getting to home plate.

pro-tip: women aren't bitter and angry if they turn you down (if it helps you feel better then run with it champ), it just means they don't like you and you're less of a man for it. Try faking your own death as others have suggested. Also 's choking advice is spot on.

I know that. These are the kinds of women that are totally bitter though. I can tell just by overhearing their convos. They all hate their parents and are always talking about how much the world sucks.

Then stop trying to pick up teenagers.

Avatar image for glentennis
#47 Posted by GlenTennis (3273 posts) -

@Living_Monstrosity said:

pretend to be a wizard

You answered your own question.

Avatar image for living_monstrosity
#48 Posted by Living_Monstrosity (76 posts) -

@forkboy said:

@Living_Monstrosity said:

I just want to get with a goth girl for one night cuz I heard they're freaky in bed and I want to see if it's true. But these kinds of girls are just so bitter and angry, which makes getting to first base difficult, let alone getting to home plate.

Goth chick: What kind of music do you like?

Me: Death metal and euro-dance. You?

Goth chick: WTF? Your music taste sucks ass!

Me: I doubt your music taste is any better.

Goth chick: Oh please, I bet you've never even heard of Moonspell you tool!

-_-

This shit is cringeworthy. Goths are just people. Some of them are very nice, some of them are petty fucks. So for starters try not being an awful douchebag who only wants to say "hey I fucked a goth lol".

I don't see how wanting to have sex with a specific type of girl out of curiosity is equivalent to being a douchebag.

Avatar image for brocknrolla
#49 Posted by BrockNRolla (1725 posts) -

@Living_Monstrosity said:

this one girl told me to f*** myself and called me a conformist when I merely asked her name.

That's a red flag. Move along.

Avatar image for living_monstrosity
#50 Posted by Living_Monstrosity (76 posts) -

@BrockNRolla said:

@Living_Monstrosity said:

this one girl told me to f*** myself and called me a conformist when I merely asked her name.

That's a red flag. Move along.

Oh I already did from that one. She was a total bitch.