Rate the last movie you watched.

Edit: Geez, this post keeps getting longer and longer. I keep watching stuff but I don't want to make a separate post so soon.

Oh man, I've got a bit of a movie dump here. Been on a kick the last week. I watched Hereditary, which then lead me to find the discussion thread on here, which then I think it was there I saw someone mention "RLM" maybe? For some reason? So I had to figure out what that was.. and discovered the magic that is Red Letter Media's "Half in the Bag" and "re:View" series on YouTube. This has lead me to binge watching a bunch of their videos, digging up some movies I missed, and also movies I've had but just kinda brushed off and never got around to. Also not a fan of horror films but pushing myself to watch some. I feel like I get scared easily, my over-active imagination and all, but most of these movies suck and don't leave much room for imagination. Like, fuck playing some scary games. That sense of dread is what gets me.

Raw (2016) - 5/5 - Also known as "Grave" perhaps? French film. It's on Netflix. Just got done watching it a min ago.. Man. Essentially about a vegetarian girl going to college to be a vet and becoming cannibalistic. More to it than that of course, but that's how it appears on the surface and how it's put on screen. Good stuff. I found it intriguing, suspenseful, curious and sexy. Weirdly, I've got a bit of a crush on the main actress now. I love when female characters are given some level of aggression or predatory nature, because that's my experience in real life. Under that veil of innocence or shyness, they very much know what they want. Cool movie. Maybe stay away if you're uncomfortable with blood/gore. It's not jump scares or anything, just sort of drama/thriller/light-horror.

The Neon Demon (2016) - 5/5 - One I had sitting on the back burner, dug it out thanks to RLM. Glad I finally got around to it because that was good shit. Young girl heads to LA to become a model.. Abstract, mysterious, creepy, dark, trippy, great visuals and music. I had to go online afterwards and watch some stuff about this to have full appreciation. If you can, watch this on an OLED screen in the dark. The perfect black levels works wonders for movies like this. I'm in love with this song (The Demon Dance) and the scene it's paired with. I want to overlay this music onto so many things I can imagine.

Enemy (2013) - 4/5 - RLM suggestion. Another weird, sort of abstract movie that forces you to think. Denis Villeneuve directs (Sicario, Arrival, Blade Runner 2049, Prisoners.) Jake Gyllenhaal's character stumbles across someone that looks exactly like him in a movie and investigates. Eerie, suspenseful, mysterious. I had to immediately go online afterwards to try and understand what was going on in this movie, in a good way. And boy, that last scene.

I Don't Feel At Home In This World Anymore (2017) - 3/5 - Mentioned on RLM. On Netflix. Young woman is unhappy with the way the world works, her house gets robbed, hi-jinks ensue. Main actress (Melanie Lynskey) was good and fun. Elijah Wood co-stars, which was nice because I pretty much only know him from LotR. Both funny and sad. I can relate to how she feels about people being pieces of shit.

Hereditary (2018) - 3/5 - Wow, did you guys hype this up in the forums or what. Didn't see it in theaters i.e. didn't care enough to drive to a bigger theater 20 mins away and pay $10+ for a ticket and I'm glad I didn't. While the movie was decent, it was no where near as terrifying or fucked up as people were making it sound. Seemed better than most horror stuff but that bar is practically hovering right off the floor so.. yea. Had it's moments. Slow burn, which is probably better for a horror film. In the end, the story felt like.. unfulfilling? Or the way it was conveyed felt so? This one I had to look up to verify my interpretation was correct, but like in a shitty way. Nice to see Gabriel Byrne in something.

Lake Mungo (2008) - 2/5 - Another horror flick. This one of Australian origin. Jay of RLM highly recommended this in one of their videos. Meh. Very simple movie. Not much scary stuff here. Only one moment gave me the hebejeebies and they cheapen it with the only jump scare.

World's Greatest Dad (2009) - 2/5 - Another Jay RLM suggestion. "One of the funniest movies in the last decade" I believe were his words. I don't think this made me laugh at all. One of Robin Williams last roles I imagine. Movie is more drama/depressing than anything. I guess you could say its got a dry sense of humor but eh.

Grimsby (AKA The Brothers Grimsby) (2016) - 2/5 - Sacha Baron Cohen joint. I think it was Mike on RLM that said he found this hilarious? Maybe his sarcasm went over my head, but I made it like 75% through the movie I'd guess and just turned it off. I've got nothing against Sacha Baron Cohen, and bless his heart for locking Isla Fisher down, but I guess I just found this rather dull.

Crank: High Voltage (2009) - 3/5 - The sequel. Maybe I'd actually seen this already but just can't remember. I like Statham and Amy Smart is super cute but this was kinda boring. Again, maybe because I'd seen it already or the gimmick didn't do anything for me. Tired of movies doing non-stop quick cuts. That isn't "action", it's just a seizure inducing shit show.

Won't You Be My Neighbor? (2018) - 2/5 - Maybe someone else with a better heart would find this more interesting. Mine is just a brick of coal cloaked in dark matter. I remember watching the show as a kid and I thought this would be a fascinating behind-the-scenes. Like, I remember the Trolley specifically and always thought that set was awesome with the train coming out of the wall. The show doesn't even touch on how that came to be though, and it's pretty much just about Fred Rodgers. I never knew he was a church/religious sort of dude, which is impressive because that never really came across in the show I guess. It didn't seem preachy I guess you could say? Probably wouldn't have even realized that as a child though I suppose.

Ocean's 8 (2018) - 3/5 - Disappointing. Sandra Bullock doesn't quite have the same allure to me that she used to. I thought Helena Bonham Carter was the stand out character for me, as much as she could be in this ensemble piece. There's something about her in movies that I find attractive. Other than Cate Blanchett, the rest of the cast I either didn't even recognize or I've seen them somewhere before but nothing remarkable. Why even put Rihanna in this? Feel like they could've really grabbed a bunch of amazing actresses to fill these roles. Throw more starpower at the problem. Oh geez and I completely forgot Anne Hathaway was in it and she is one of my biggest crushes. Yet I still forgot she was in this.. see what I mean? Boring heist.

First Reformed (2017) - 3/5 - Hmm. Not sure I can sum this story up. Saw it a week ago maybe? Some dark themes here. Very melancholy. Stars Ethan Hawke and Amanda Seyfried. Good performances. But yea, just the sort of movie to really make you feel.. bleeeeeh. Was a bit puzzled by the ending but opted not to dig deeper.

Evil Dead (2013) - 4/5 - Never seen the original. Don't have any reverence or reference for this. It was corny, creepy, but had quality. I thought it was decent. Good/funny gore effects. Particularly loved the last kill.. I may have been laughing out loud at that part. Only part that was intolerable and is one of my stupid-movie-buttons was where the idiot guy continues to look at and read the book even though it EXPLICITLY SAYS ALL OVER THE DAMNED THING NOT TO DO THAT!

Gerald's Game - 3/5 - Odd movie. Certainly had some creepy parts in it, even though the movie doesn't necessarily present itself that way at first. Odd twist. Apparently based on a Stephen King work. Feel like I don't see many movies that pretty much take place in one room. And it's interesting to see how they still gave the actors stuff to do.

Lights Out (2016) - 4/5 - Heeeeey, a horror movie that wasn't too shabby! Saw it mentioned on RLM, and I guess the bit of the short film its based on was scary enough to me that I thought I'd give this a whirl. The initial premise is the sort of thing that creeps me out. Not many cheap jump scares that I can remember, but mostly good, creepy lingering shots.

Robocop (1987) - 4/5 - Rewatch I guess. Good shit. Shame that remake one sucked. Original has a great blend of humor, action, and some light drama. Also, that generation Ford Taurus as a cop car always cracked me up. Just weird to see. My mom had the station wagon version.

THE NATURAL (1985) (rewatch) - 5/5 - One of the best sports movies of all time. One of the best endings of all time. (Don't watch this video if you haven't seen the movie!)

Mission: Impossible III - 2/5
Philip Seymour Hoffman is amazing and his performance is the only thing that stands out in this movie.

Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol - 1.5/5
I really like some of the actors like Simon Pegg and Paula Patton in this and their banter as a team is fun at times, but this was also just mind numbingly boring for an action movie. I don’t give a shit if Tom Cruise jumps on a plane, scales a building with weird gloves or runs from a sandstorm when the plot is so fucking boring and the characters feel paper-thin.

Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation - 1/5
This is just a rehash of Ghost Protocol. It’s the same formula and it’s just as boring if not more. I really don’t understand the critics praise for this, it just feels like Tom Cruise: The Movie. These movies are just for him to act and look like his version of a badass, which is basically the character Decker by comedian Tim Heidecker.

Conclusion: Having watched 5 M:I movies and only somewhat enjoying the first one it’s safe to say that this franchise is not for me.

That's not saying much, har-har. Also I don't think I understood that film. Just like there are war movies and anti-war movies, the Natural might be an anti-sports movie. It's quite an interesting exercise to contemplate the reasons, why sports documentaries are way way better than any dramatization or fiction, things like The Armstrong Lie(2013), Red Army(2014), Riding Giants(2004), Sunshine Superman(2014) and Pumping Iron(1977).

Unrelated, I've watched Under the Skin recently and it turned out to be a real challenge to finish. 2/5 To think I could watch anything with ScarJo, but it has been a long time since I really appreciated her, Match Point (2005), there is a kind of sports movie I can get behind, talk about a male fantasy.

A STORY OF YONOSUKE (2013) (rewatch) - 5/5 - I unabashedly love this movie. It's heartwarming, life-affirming, and more than a little bittersweet. The story is about an ordinary dude that has more of an impact on everyone around him than they realize, and it hits similar notes to films like IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE, but without being overly sentimental and saccharine. More people need to see this. Admittedly, my video only focuses on one relationship, but it's the most significant one.

Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2. 0/5. It's a war crime that fails to disguise itself as a dumpster fire.

Watched Rampage with the kids. Dumb, but fun. It felt like most characters were playing it pretty straight, but the villain characters may as well have been twirling their mustaches and laughing out MU-WAHAHAHAHA! for the length of the film.

Solid HDR implementation, though the CG stuff often looked oddly lit in ways I’ve not seen since the 90s. I’m assumig that’s the price to pay for higher resolution and expanded color pallets.

Anyhow, dumb movie, but it let me lay on the couch with the kids.

Hostiles

Watched this one with my wife on Netflix. I liked it a lot, but it’s messaging had all the subtlety of a hammer to the nose.

I felt like it could have been shorter. The same message was told repeatedly and with too little variance or narrative justification.

Great character work, beautiful vistas. It told a solid story, made me care, and is certainly worth a view.

The Call - 2/5

The premise itself is solid, and there's lots of potential in there for a good movie. However, the movie is filled with a lot of contrived and convenient moments. My main issue though was that the ending felt like it was incompatible with the rest of the movie's tone.

Oh, um, also, apparently this movie was made by the WWE :blink...

Lord of the Flies (1990) - 3/5

A fairly good adaptation of the book, even though it's not entirely faithful...I mean, there's not even the "sucks to your assmar" line!

Regardless, I still enjoyed the movie.

Upgrade - 3/5

Fun sci-fi movie with a nice premise that doesn't quite pay off in the end. Action is very well done but there is sadly not enough of it.

Inside Llewyn Davis - 3/5

I think the main thing I got out of this movie is a reminder of how much I like John Goodman's performances...

Lord of the Rings trilogy 5/5

Just rewatched these for the first time since they came out, and wow they hold up really well. I enjoyed them way more than when i saw them as a 13-15 year old. Ian McKellen in particular was very good.

Jurassic World - 3/5

Didn't love it, didn't hate it. It just left me completely indifferent. The genetically modified Dinosaur thing can go to hell though. Dinosaurs are cool enough (Jurassic Park proved that) you don't have to start down this derpy ass'd weaponized dinosaurs rabbit hole; now that they've gone there it'll be hard as hell to pull out of that downward spiral.

At the Earth's Core - 4/5

Love me a good rubber monster movie and dear lord did this one deliver. Gets bonus points for having Caroline Munro.

SEARCHING (2018) - 4/5 - Solid, effective thriller in the vein of "Screenlife" style of movies. And it's just cool to see a flick starring an Asian dude that doesn't go out of its way to point out his Asian-ness, nor end with a martial arts fight scene.

JURASSIC WORLD: FALLEN KINGDOM (2018) - 3/5 - It's even dumber than the first JURASSIC WORLD, which is saying something, but still entertaining. There are worse ways to kill 2 hours on a Saturday night. I would say its direction is better than the first one, especially in tense sequences such as when the little girl is "hiding" in her bed from the indoraptor. But the writing is just terrible. Can we get David Koepp back?

WON'T YOU BE MY NEIGHBOR? (2018) - 3/5 - Did this man really exist? Yes, I've seen episodes of his old show, but I just can't believe that there aren't any skeletons in his closet. I wanted to learn more about Mr. Rogers the man, what made him tick, and more of his life story. But what I got was more about Mr. Rogers the children's show host. It's still worth watching to reinforce that idea that we all just need to be more neighborly to one another like Mr. Rogers told us countless times. Sorely needs to be reminded in 2018.

Tomb Raider - Not a very good movie - 2/5.

@xshinobi: Yeah, that seems to be the general consensus which is weird because my wife and I genuinely enjoyed it. (We also love the !@#$ out of the Prince of Persia movie so maybe, just maybe, we just have terrible terrible taste.) :P

DESTINATION WEDDING (2018) - 4/5 - Essentially Keanu and Winona bickering for 90 minutes. I need at least two sequels.

@dbones80: Yea, that movie was interesting. As a miserable, cynical person myself who doesn't like going anywhere or doing anything according to my friends (I'd say I'm just misunderstood), I was excited when I saw the trailer.

Movie wasn't quite what I expected but I still found myself amused through the whole thing. I laughed out loud at a few parts. I think it takes a certain type of person to enjoy this one, likely someone who has a similar dark outlook on life and people.

Still, my favorite part is when Winona asks him to describe her, while they casually hang out in bed. Ugh my god.. what he says does an amazing job summing up what I like in a woman. And its written in a way that is sort of poetic and beautiful but not in the corny, flowery way that romance is typically thought of. It also doesn't hurt that I think she looks great in this and is just my type.

Destination Wedding (2018) - 4/5

I've watched a lot of stuff again but don't want to pile on the thread.

@nick: I watched them with my daughter not long ago. I was prepared for them to be iffy, but they were really enjoyable.

I just watched a thing and it was so bizarre that I felt the uncontrollable urge to word barf. Not two posts ago I said I wasn't ready but my hand has been forced..

Elle (2016) - 2/5 - A french film. Directed by Paul Verhoeven of Robocop, Total Recall, and Starship Troopers fame. This movie ended with me audibly sitting here saying "What the fuck did I just watch?!" There are two aspects to this:

• The story and events itself. The subject matter is a more serious discussion, and I'm not entirely sure I understood what this was going for. It might've been some weird tie in about sex, violence, women, and video games. Not really interested in discussing that.
• The other part of this is how video games are weirdly involved. Maybe completely unnecessary to moving the narrative? Unless there is some deeper commentary here. The lead character is a middle aged woman who runs a game development company. Cool, no problem. Now, remember how we all laugh and talk about how fake video games are generated for scenes in movies? All the funny discussions about it on the podcasts. I don't remember this movie ever coming up. To cut to the chase: The video game character, poster, and title Styx is actually used in multiple scenes of the movie. One bizarre scene has them in a dev meeting and sampling some of the animations. Styx sprouting tentacles out of his body and essentially holding down and killing this female character. I've only seen the QL of the Styx games, but I don't remember anything like that. The game animation is later used as part of certain events where its been edited to be Styx with tentacles raping the character. There is so much to unpack about this stuff but I'm not necessarily here to do that. I was just shocked to have never heard of this before. They mention trying to get Activision to publish their game (at least it said Activision in the subtitles)? In a later scene, a poster for The Last of Us can be clearly seen in multiple shots. Another scene has them playing Styx at a PS4 demo kiosk.

It was just so weird. I don't understand why games are in this movie. Why Styx? Why Activision? Why PS4? Based on the movie subject matter, I would've thought any of these companies would've been like "Uhh no thank you, we don't think this really aligns with the image we are trying to present for the company." or something. Doesn't appear to be mentioned on the Giant Bomb wiki page either. Feel like it needs to be recorded just as one of the rare anomalies where a real video game is used in non-video game related piece of media.

I'm still so confused. Only giving it a 2 because, in general, the story was kinda all over the place for me.

Youth (2015) - 3/5 - Michael Caine, Harvey Keitel, Rachel Weisz. A slow, odd, introspective sort of movie. The usual stuff. What it means to live, to love, to grow old etc. Not sure I really took anything away from it that I didn't already feel. I ended up really liking the song/band that plays at the start of the movie: The Retrosettes - You've Got the Love. Very good performances I'd say, which is what you need for something with subject matter and a pace like this.

Support the Girls (2018) - 3/5 - I'd call this one pretty depressing. The kind where you feel shitty afterwards. Regina Hall plays a manager of your run-of-the-mill sports bar restaurant Hooters analogue thing. Not sure what to say about it other than.. It sucks to have a shit ass job? Certain aspects of it reminded me of myself. Good performances. Haley Lu Richardson is fire..

Skyscraper (2018) - 4/5 - Dwayne Johnson has a finger in half the movies that hit screens at this point. Went in with zero expectations, came out thinking it was decent. I was fully expecting another crappy San Andreas level generic action movie junk but I felt like it was a loose, modern take on the original Die Hard. Big building, bad guys, and the one guy who can do something about it. Not too shabby. And now I feel like some kinda creepy broken record but, Neve Campbell looked and did great in this. I mention it because I haven't seen her in like.. anything really since Scream? Haven't seen that movie in forever but it's like she hasn't aged? Hope she gets some more roles.

Humor Me (2017) - 3/5 - I love me some Jermaine Clement. Was expecting this to be more of a comedy (which is the genre it's placed under) but really it was another kinda-depressing, romantic light-comedy. Hes sort of an unmotivated, uninspired, failing writer, and his life is falling apart. Moves in with his father in a retirement community and events proceed from there. I wouldn't say Jermaine did poorly, but I like seeing him in a funnier light.

Spider Man (2002) - 3/5 & Spider Man 2 (2004) - 3/5 - While playing the latest Spider-Man game (now beaten, platinum'd, and tossed on the shelf) I was in a curious mood for some supplementary Spider-Man media. I know I had seen this before but it would've been around release. I can't remember anything about the third one or if I've seen it. Not much to say here. I think the Tom Holland version of the character is very good, although in retrospect, maybe Homecoming wasn't as much of what I wanted. I started rewatching Homecoming after these and kinda shut it off after a bit. Something about it was kinda dull. Like maybe I wanted more Tom Holland Spider-Man just running around the city handling general crime stuff. J.K. Simmons should just be brought back because he does an amazing job with that character. Casting Willem Dafoe as goblin is both perfect and ridiculous. He face has goblin written all over it.. but maybe too corny a role for someone as good as him. Was also interesting seeing a young, earlier role for Elizabeth Banks, who I had no idea was in this with a small part. Lucy Lawless is the "punk rock girl" on screen for a sentence? I'm also not sure I've ever seen the later "Amazing Spider-Man" movies, but based on some images, I'm not sure I want to..

** Intermission ** - God dayum, I watched more movies than I thought since last post..

Bone Tomahawk (2015) - 4/5 - A thriller, drama, horror, western thing staring Kurt Russell, Patrick Wilson, Richard Jenkins among others. Some people go missing in the middle of the night due to some local tribe. A couple small, very graphic moments. Movie was less horror/action than I expected. Still, was intriguing nonetheless. Great performances. Events maybe didn't go quite as I expected or was hoping I'd say.

Brawl in Cell Block 99 (2017) - 4/5 - Same writer/director as Bone Tomahawk (S. Craig Zahler). Stars Vince Vaughn playing what I'd call a Vince Vaughn kinda roll. A big dude that is fairly straightforward. Also staring the sister from Dexter (Jennifer Carpenter) and the oh-so-charming Don Johnson. A little Udo Kier in there for my Command & Conquer: Yuri's Revenge friends. Surprise appearance by the guy who played the wonderful villain in the latest Luke Cage season (the rasta dude), Mustafa Shakir. It's the only other thing I've seen him in. Premise is.. hmm.. Their family is not doing so well, things happen, Vince Vaughn gets put in jail. Don't want to spoil anything from there. Again, a handful of very graphic, violent scenes. This is the one role where Vince Vaughn can do the things that it looks like he was meant to do.. Fuck people up.

Summer of 84 (2018) - 4/5 - Suspense, thriller, mystery, drama. A movie tapping into the whole '80s nostalgia vibe. Granted, it sounds like this was in production back when that first started. Young boys are being abducted in the area. A group of friends (a la Goonies, Stranger Things etc) take it upon themselves to investigate. Slow burn. Fairly good and creepy I'd say. One or two particular moments I will remember for quite awhile I think.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom - 2/5 - Why do I even bother watching this garbage anymore. Went in with low expectations and it still managed to limbo its way under a bar so low. Not sure what I can say other than all of this crap is absurd. As I've seen other people say, and they might've even said it in one of the movies: Why does this movie need all this other nonsense? Just seeing dinosaurs is amazing enough. Dumb as hell. Don't bother. If the original Jurassic park (and even the other old ones, as crappy as those kinda were) are your traditional, normal dinosaurs for our viewing pleasure.. then the Jurassic World series is them, digging up the bones and amber of a long dead series, extracting whats left of it, and breathing life into a hideous, sinful, bastard creation, twisting everything that made the old ones decent into some modern, hybrid, unrecognizable, stupid weaponized piece of shit.

Solo: A Star Wars Story - 4/5 - Violent swing in the opposite direction from the last movie.. I thought everyone said this was junk? I thought it looked like junk from the trailer. I didn't see any reason for this movie, and I've thought all of the new ones were pretty bad (Rogue One was okay). Again, low expectations on entry.. annnd.. Wait.. It's not that bad? If anything, it gave me more of a vibe of the original movies. The color (or lack of it) and grime of everything. It felt a little more small scale. The actors were all kinda meh, except Chewie and Donald Glover as Lando I guess. Emelia Clarke didn't seem right in that role, and whoever the main guy is trying to play Han.. Sorry dude but no one can do that role right. Yea, I dunno. I thought the whole thing was not so bad. I like the music when the Destiny-like enemy shows up.. But I'm also not sure I felt the music belonged in these scenes? And as one of those people who thought the only cool thing from the prequels was Darth Maul, I thought his appearance here was completely random and weird. Not sure if I should be happy about that or sad. The best of all the new Star Wars movies, but that isn't much of a feat.

You're Next (2011) - 3/5 - Thriller, Horror thing. Bunch of family meet up at a house. They start getting killed off. Somewhat straightforward but not quite. Has some slight twists. Some graphic violence in there. Sharni Vinson, whom I'm not sure I've seen in anything else, does a good job here being cute, warm.. and then some.

Sicario: Day of the Soldado (2018) - 3/5 - Watched the original Sicario somewhat recently and was pleasantly surprised. This one isn't quite the same thing. Didn't quite go in directions I wanted or expected. Didn't measure up to the first. Was missing that same gravitas. Maybe they'll decide to continue this because I like Benecio and Josh Brolin's characters and I like the super dark, realistic world these movies portray. Feels like some kinda good Tom Clancy shit.

Iron Fist (Season 2) - 3/5 - Never watched the first season as I had heard it was bad. Got to see some of Danny and Colleen in the other Netflix series. Saw something about this one being better so I sat down and binged watched it. Seemed on par with the others. Not bad. Very much have a crush on Colleen. Maybe wish there was a little less romance drama and a little more ass kicking. I'll probably watch a season three just because.

Hunt for the Wilderpeople (2016) - 3/5 - A Taika Waititi joint. I liked "What We Do In The Shadows" and its weird to that this guy is directing Avengers movies now, so gave this one a go finally. Young boy in foster care is placed with a family. Hi-jinks ensue. Funny, odd, and charming. Sam Neil is great here. Check it out if you like the New Zealand accent.

And I think that's all I've got for now. Sadly, I'm starting new job on Monday so there goes all my freedom and good times. I still have all these other movies I could watch but who knows how that'll go.

The Soy Who Dumped Me: 2/5

I’m not the target audience for this movie and the host of girls I watched it with really enjoyed it but I just didn’t think it was super funny, despite a very talented cast who were clearly trying.

I did like the sudden bursts of violence that were just plain gnarly, though.

Mandy: I don't honestly know what to say about this movie. It's got a fairly straightforward plot, but also I'm not sure what happened at all. It's metal as hell, and Nic Cage is legitimately great in it - but the real standout is probably Linus Roache as the cult-leader villain. The soundtrack is incredible, every shot is gorgeously lit and framed, and also two men have a chainsaw duel. The whole thing feels like a dream. It's like someone took Upstream Color and made it metal. I loved it.

3 animated title cards out of 3

Solo A Star Wars Story: 6/10 - So this wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, in fact it was kinda fun. With that being said it didn't really feel like it should ever existed. The whole story felt like some cheap fan fiction they randomly pulled off the internet. Is this crap seriously cannon now? The characters were done okay I guess, Alden Ehrenreich acted a lot like Han Solo would, but just didn't give off the same vibe and especially the look, he felt a bit wrong. Donald Glover did mostly fine as Lando, didn't really mind him. His droid L3-37 however, was the most forced out of place crap in a Star Wars movie I've ever seen. It made Jar Jar Binks and Ewoks feel totally believable and likable in comparison, it was just all sorts of awful and is the only thing in the movie I truly hated, I just couldn't stop cringing the entire time it was on screen. I think it reminded me a bit of the prequels, dumb plot and dialog, but overall still felt fun. I enjoyed it more than The Last Jedi.

A Wrinkle in Time is somehow a 4/5 or fuck it maybe 5/5 movie despite a lot that should go against it: awfully overwrought, cheesy special effects, a six year-old you wanna punch, creepy love interest, messy editing. All of this goes to the wayside to make a movie with a great emotional core that I hardly get out of big budget movies anymore, plus give me a frequent change of scenery and I can be that much closer to being sold in a spectacle sense. An easy movie to turn your nose against and by all accounts you still will (see "they say Charles Wallace like every five seconds," the fucking Charles Wallace kid himself, and the kids pretending to jump off of fake cabbage lady at one point), but dammit it really is unlike anything I've seen this year and it turns out I mean that unironically.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail - 4/5

A very silly movie.

The Room - 2/5

I am glad to have finally experienced this thing...not actually the worst movie I've seen.

Although, it did help that I was watching it with a bunch of other people, which made it pretty fun to watch.

• Get Out - 5/5
• The Witch - 4/5
• Hereditary - 4/5
• The Incredibles 2 - 3/5

@seikenfreak: Bone Tomahawk is great, and yeah, I’m not going to watch Jurassic World (saw the first one because my wife and kids wanted to see it...abysmal...

I actually liked Iron Fist Season One more than Season Two. I also thought Luke Cage Season One wad bad while Luke Cage Season 2 was really good, so these takes might be kinda hot.

I thought Iron Fist Season One had a stable and consistent plot in Danny coming back to NYC and fulfilling his destiny fighting the hand. I think the aggravating naivety of his character was charming and purposeful, and that was reflected in the supporting cast eye-rolling at him all the time.

Anyhow, the second season felt...weird? Not too fast (less episodes help, Netflix!), not to slow, but...there was a weird lack of urgency to anything that was happening. Maybe that’s part of Danny learning to have some chill. Also, as a non-comic reader, all the shit that happened at the end of the season felt rushed and bananas. Reading into the history they’re drawing from, I get it more now.

VERY curious to see where Luke Cage and Iron Fist go next...Optimistic, too.

The Predator

I wanted so very, very much to love this movie. It definitely has its moments, but it falls short in so many ways. For one, it seems tonally confused. I love Shane Black in general. His writing is often clever and hilarious, and while The Predator is certainly funny, it's at the cost of there being absolutely no tension or horror to the situation whatsoever. The cast is good and the dialogue and jokes occasionally shine, but I really think Black should've reeled it in a bit. Comedy is welcome, but that shouldn't be the focus.

All of that stuff would've worked better if the pacing wasn't so rapid. There are so many characters but the movie barely gives you a chance to start giving a shit about them. The editing is simply poor, and it sometimes feels like there are transitional or exposition scenes missing. Characters just suddenly wind up in a new place without much explanation. The final act also begins so abruptly that it has no real weight behind it. There's no build-up and it feels very rushed, and it's also kinda hard to tell what's going on and who's dying. I think the movie honestly should've been another 15 or so minutes longer. A quick pace and rapid editing can work to the benefit of some movies, but not one that has this many characters and this much going on. The original Predator works because it only focuses on the guys in the jungle and doesn't have to deal with a plethora of secondary and tertiary characters. I don't need in-depth character development or tons of lingering shots and slowburn scenes, but I would like something coherent and cohesive, something that gave a shit about its audience.

The ending is also just...really fucking corny. The whole movie is corny, actually, and there isn't anything inherently wrong with that, but it's a level of cheese that I don't think The Predator deserves.

All that said, I was still entertained. There is some good action and gore (although the majority of it is CGI), and I did enjoy many of the characters and dialogue. We don't often get hard-R action films with a budget anymore, that's nice to see at least. Like I said, there are moments of near brilliance here and there, but knowing everything around those moments doesn't stack up makes them that much more frustrating. The Predators themselves look fucking great and are as badass as you would want, they just need to be in a better movie. The Predator is a mess of a movie that, at best, feels like exactly the sum of its parts and nothing more. A bunch fun working pieces that don't gel well together at all. In a vacuum, I'd give The Predator a 3/5. As a Predator movie, I'd give it a 2/5 and say it's easily the worst in the franchise. As both a Predator fan and a Shane Black fan, that hurts, but it's the truth.

@casepb said:

It's like learning that the monicker Hodor actually came from "HOLD THE DOOR", origin stories may be the best thing about superheroes, but learning how the one-trick-pony acquired their skill is sort of disillusioning. Although the L3 robot gets a lot of criticism, it does represent how we imagine the interaction between man and machine, in the 70s it was a subservient, awkward and yet very polite C-3PO, and now in 2018 it's the authoritative, wisecracking, empowered and creepy thing, just like Siri, Alexa, Cortana.

Still, it's a failure by Disney's prop/model-making, who de-sexualized the droid, turning it into a Roomba-headed terminator to the point where it just induces cringe. The story and the dialogue makes much more sense with something lifelike and lovable that is probably already made in Japan.

In TNG Data was boning by season 1, on daytime TV.

With all the Joaquin Phoenix Joker talk, I noticed that The King of Comedy was on Amazon.

It’s one of a very small number of Scorsese or DeNiro (20th century) movies I hadn’t seen, so I took the opportunity to fill this gap in my watchlist.

Solid film. Light and dark at the same time, and it’s as relevant as ever. It’s not a masterpiece, but it’s a different film from those involved that had something to say, and an interesting way of saying it.

Manos Hand of Fate - 2/5

Another day, another bad movie. I'm not really sure what to say, other than, 'wow, this movie has a lot of slapping'...

I'm at Fantastic Fest, a genre film festival in Austin, TX. Here's what I saw on my first day:

CHAINED FOR LIFE (2018) - 4/5 - I have a thing for movies about movie-making, especially when they're so clever about it. All in all, I'm not sure I understand what this movie is really "about", but I liked the individual scenes, more when they're a movie within the movie.

THE WORLD IS YOURS (2018) - 4/5 - There are some amazing needle drops in this breezy crime/heist film from France. But even more amazing are the characters -- Vincent Cassel's Henri, who drones on and on about anything and everything -- Bruce, the Scottish drug lord that brings his preteen daughter to a deal -- Isabelle Adjani as the overbearing mother that loves money as much as she loves her son, and so many more -- I'm not sure which is my favorite. I would love to see sequels and spinoffs about any of these characters. This fills the OCEAN'S void rather nicely (no, I didn't forget OCEAN'S 8, I just don't care).

THE GUILTY (2018) - 4/5 - This the best "guy talks on the phone for 90 minutes" movie. Yes, it's better than PHONE BOOTH, BURIED, and LOCKE.

TUMBBAD (2018) - 2/5 - It has a solid premise, but the execution is severely lacking. There are couple of decent moments of horror in "chapter one" regarding the grandmother, but almost none afterwards. It just seems like an overlong TALES FROM THE CRYPT episode from India, and a bad one at that.

I finally watched Looking for Richard, Al Pacino's documentary about Shakespeare, how to interpret it, the language barriers (especially from an American perspective), etc. It was so much weirder and more intense than I anticipated. They filmed significant scenes from the play for real, with actors like Spacey, Baldwin, Ryder, and a lot of other recognizable faces, plus Pacino as . . . guess who. Boy, does he really GO for it, too. They all did interesting things with their line delivery in terms of meter and inflection overall, which was fascinating to see as an Englishman. Baldwin was a particular class act as Duke of Clarence.

Between each scene we see deep analysis, rehearsals, mini history lessons, interviews with scholars and legendary board-treaders like Jacobi and Branagh, Pacino asking random people on the street what they think of Shakespeare -- you know, documentary stuff.

It's pretty funny, too; they accidentally set off a fire alarm in Shakespeare's house at one point. My highlights came from Pacino and Frederic Kimball, who are just brilliant, bouncing off each other like brothers high on life (and probably other things, to be honest...), shouting passionately and developing their own interpretations as the documentary unfolds. It's actory as fuuuck, but great.

What's sad is that they never made a Richard III movie with their team, as it was never their intention, but, man, it sure felt worth making to me. Michael Mann even did the final battle scene for god sake! Alas...

Here's my favourite scene.

Anyway, I enjoyed it a lot.

The Shape of Water is on HBO Go. I generally like Tel Toro, namely when he’s not making shit movies about giant robots, and this was no different.

It’s no Pan’s Labyrinth (I bet he’s sick of this), but it’s really good.

4 Pan’s Labyrinths out of 5.

Day two at Fantastic Fest:

BORDER (2018) - 3/5 - This movie goes some places. It's best seen knowing little as possible so I'm going to be vague here. It feels really long, but I just checked and IMDB lists it at 1 hour 41 minutes. Can't be right. It's very slow, and in the end, it didn't really turn out to be my type of movie. But the lead performance by Eva Melander is fantastic. I would still recommend it to the adventurous types, it's worth watching once.

THE PERFECTION (2018) - 4/5 - This movie is bonkers. Part De Palma, part Park Chan-wook, part Aronofsky, and a whole lotta insanity. How are they going to market this movie? My favorite of the festival so far.

MAY THE DEVIL TAKE YOU (2018) - 3/5 - Indonesian EVIL DEAD, but replace all the campy fun parts with family melodrama. Some scares were effective, but not particularly original. And most of the family scenes went way too long, dragging the pace down. I expected a bit more from the co-director of SAFE HAVEN (from V/H/S 2), but it's still solid for what it is.

THE NIGHT COMES FOR US (2018) - 4/5 - Well this was certainly the most violent action film I've seen to date. It's a solid 3 star flick that stands out from the pack with copious amounts of blood and gore. But once it gets to the final fight between Joe Taslim and Iko Uwais, it earns an extra star. This is a step up from HEADSHOT, that's for sure. Alas, I still like THE RAID series more.

@dbones80: Thanks for the impressions of The Night Comes for Us, been looking forward to checking that one out...

Just watched the animated Batman vs Two Face. It's similar to Batman: Return of the Caped crusaders with Adam West. The difference here is that it has some Newer Batman villains in the mix making it a bit strange yet a lot of fun. If you enjoyed that 2016 Batman with Adam West then you will love him in this as a lot of the voice actors return. It's a bit silly, goofy and just a lot fun. It's on Amazon Prime for free if you have that too.

@nutter: Sure thing. It comes out on Netflix next month so you'll get to see it soon.

@dbones80: Cool, thanks for the heads-up!

Day three at Fantastic Fest:

WEREWOLF (2018) - 4/5 - PSA: This is not a werewolf movie. What starts out as a Holocaust drama somehow turns into a thriller inside an abandoned mansion, then ends in an unexpected way that was better than how I imagined it would go. A pleasant surprise of the fest so far.

UNDER THE SILVER LAKE (2018) - 3/5 - This wasn't what I expected from David Robert Mitchell as a followup to IT FOLLOWS. But that's probably what people said about that movie, after he debuted with THE MYTH OF THE AMERICAN SLEEPOVER. He's not sticking with one genre. This is one weird ass movie. There's a lot of Hitchcock and noir here, and it very much reminded me of INHERENT VICE. Like that film, there's a lot to unpack, and it will require multiple viewings to find more clues to the overall story. Right now, it's a little too scattershot and messy for me. Oh, but that one SPIDER-MAN gag was really good.

ONE CUT OF THE DEAD (2017) - 4/5 - The first 30 minutes are kinda painful to sit through, but the rest of the film manages to elevate that first act into something great. Not going to say anything else because the fun is in the surprising way this movie unfolds and adds to what you've seen before. Just remember to hold steady for those first 30 minutes.

Solo (5/5)

As someone whose started to loathe the recent starwars movies for failing to tread new ground, the Solo movie was a really enjoyable ride which in my mind captures the best parts of starwars. People hanging out on Starships, Capes, and exploring the weirdness of space-fantasy!

It also featured ACTUAL actors like Thandie Newton, Paul Bettany and Woody Harrelson and it really elevates it over the campiness of new trilogy.

I also really appreciated that they found a creative way to explain that the kessel run being done in 12 parsecs was actually a unit of distance rather then speed.

@junkerman: What makes the actors in the sequel trilogy not "ACTUAL" actors?

@dbones80: Will you be seeing Halloween at Fantastic Fest? I read somewhere they were holding screenings for it at FF but I could be way off, I don't know