Running my first D&D game for adults

Hey gang,

I've been a long time D&D enthusiast. My love runs back to reading the 3.5 edition Monster Manual in my local library and writing my own stories about them, and I've kinda been playing ever since then (Red Hand of Doom is the best module of all time)

However, I'm making my switch to being sat in the big boy chair of the DM in 2 weeks, and I'm looking for any tips or advice you guys could give me. I've PLAYED for over a decade, but I've never ran a proper game before for grown ups. When I worked at a primary school, I used to run a game for the children, but it was pretty stripped down and basic, with minimal dice rolling- More focusing on shared storytelling.

I'm going to be running a game for experienced players in a shop nearby, and I'm really eager to make a good first impression.

I'm going to be running Phandelver, both because I know the book pretty well, and I know it's a pretty easy intro for a new DM

Any advice for a fledgling DM duders? Any do or do nots?

Always do a session 0 if possible. Get to know your players and what they are looking for out of a tabletop experience. Different people come to the table for different reasons. As a longtime DM I can say that the number one thing you can do is understanding what your players are looking for out of each session and how you can tailor the experience to make something that the group as a whole will enjoy.

Some folks want heavy RP and don't enjoy combat as much, or vice versa. Some players want to be the "main character" and lead the direction of the story, and some players want to be lead. Some people want an open sandbox, others want a more guided railroad-type experience.

My goal as a DM is to make sure everyone at my table is having a good time. How well can you balance the personality types at your table? That's the biggest question. Also, don't feel bad if you have incompatible personality types at the table! There's only so much you can do as a DM.

Be ready for your players to do things you couldn't have prepared for. Don't be hurt when you set up for something big and they just find a way to completely skip it.

Like @nophilip mentioned, and I'm sure you already know from playing, focus on making the game fun first and once you understand the player's characters/play styles, work from that.

Good luck!

It’s very group dependent, but don’t hesitate to scuttle a greater plan if it’s for a direction your players are all into. When D&D is rolling, it feels like a good improv show. The important part is that they’re having a good time, not solving a puzzle. Austin says “be a fan of the players” a lot, and I think coming from the perspective of the PCs being characters you love (or love to hate) from a tv show you’re really into helps you make things interesting every session.

Echoing the point about Session 0: try to gin up one ally and one nemesis per character. See if there’s a logical place to stick both of them (a familiar brigand / a shopkeeper who was an old navy buddy / etc). Maybe one of them becomes a Shadow of Mordor-style recurring villain in a way your players enjoy.

There's a bit of advice from the "Dungeon World" manual that I always keep with me: "play to find out what happens." That goes for the DM too!

1) Preparation is essential, but don't chain yourself to what you've prepared. Prepare some "what" but don't force the "why." Make some characters, some locations, some encounters, and dip into that stash (and change it as needed) if you find yourself in need or an opportunity presents itself. Made a volcano encounter only to find the party took a left into the swamp instead? Lava becomes swamp juice and eruptions become bubbles of noxious gas. You'll be glad you prepared, even if the stuff you end up using in game is a Frankensteined-together mishmash of your prep.

2) I second the call for some sort of session 0. The most important question that everybody at the table needs to answer is: "why are these characters working together?" They may have different motivations, but every character needs to have some reason to want to show up every time and move the big ball down the field. I've made the "here's where our story starts, show up with characters" mistake exactly once, and I don't recommend it.

3) Here's a specific thing I like to do that I think sums up my philosophy (though it might not work for all groups). I despise Insight checks. Roll to see if this person seems like they're lying. What a bummer. Instead, I rework Insight to make it a tool for collaboration. A good Insight check gives the player the right to establish some fact about the NPC's mannerisms, affiliations, or disposition -- maybe even that they are clearly lying about [X]! Within reason, of course, but if your table's into it they will usually police themselves (that's true across the board, really). Now we're really all... playing to find out what happens!

For my D&D sessions, I try to have three types of encounters: role play, combat and a puzzle.

I agree with Peez, prepare as much stuff as you can and pull it our when it makes sense.

Whenever a player wants to do something, say "yes, and...". If you need to balance things, maybe add a cost to it.

Session Zero +1

Depending on how well you know your guests - its important to know why each one is at the table and make sure you're sprinkling in the aspects of DnD that interests them. It doesnt mean you need to do a deep dive on them day one, but be perceptive and listen to the things that excite them.

If you have a rogue in the party who has gone out of his way to make his rogue the best lock picker and trap finder that ever existed, make sure you set aside encounters where those skills shine. On the other hand if no one at your table cares about locked doors and traps maybe they're used more sparingly and a simple battle axe through the door or a fireball is enough to blow it off its hinges.

If there is a guy who is just there to do combats, he'll need some complex battles here and there to feel like the mathematically precise badass he put the effort into being.

If you have someone who really really loves magic and you're playing some low magic, grimdark realistic setting you'll have to revise your grand vision and maybe find ways to let this player discover something unique and special or find a way to let them bring their magic into play more.

A DMs job is to be a performer and an advocate for the players to discover, express and execute their interests. A DM is not a puppet master trying to play out their story.

Anecdote: I convinced my Wife to play DnD with me during COVID lockdown because I picked up Curse of Strahd and always wanted to run that module so I converted it into a 1 player campaign. I planned this session zero little tutorial experience where I'd ease her into combat and some of the more complicated game rules.

TLDR; I never played curse of Strahd with my wife. What I did end up playing was a long running romance campaign between her character and a throw away character I had intended to be a minor antagonist for her to learn combat with. Curse of Strahd is still sitting unplayed in my closet, but on the other hand I discovered I can 100% improve a medieval romance completely on the fly. I just gave up "preping" after that haha.

@junkerman: At the risk of derailing OP’s topic, I am deathly curious about how your Curse of Strahd-less romance RP went, given that it sounds like you had to shift gears from a prefab campaign to just ad-libbing the entire thing. Did you end up using the D&D rule set much, or did you spiral off into some kind of rules-lite RP to facilitate a more romantic story?

It couldn't be going better! We're having a really good time, and I feel like I'm doing a great job creating memorable encounters and moments :D

Thanks for all the advice from people in this thread. The session 0 really helped. I made a "Consent" sheet if you will, which asked them what kind of questionable/triggering content they wanna see/not see (Torture/Heat Deaths/Harm to Children/Spiders/Scorpions) etc, and that's really helped shape the encounters.

I'm really enjoying it :D